"Nothing happened." Can I believe him?

Question

In July my husband went on vacation with two of his male friends. I found out that they took three women from the Grand Canyon to Las Vegas. He's says nothing happened between him and this woman. However they had been emailing and text messaging each other for almost 2 months afterwards, now it has stopped. I confronted him with this a couple of days ago. He says he didn't do anything and has never cheated on me, even though he has have numerious chances and thinks about effing women all the time. I told him that thinking about having sex with another woman is halfway there and he will eventually do it. Am I wrong about this? And should I believe him when he says that nothing happened?

He never told me he took them there, he let me assume that they met in vegas, but i found this out on my own.

Answer 1

You'll probably never know if anything happened in Vegas with that woman. But, the fact is that he lied to you...for months! He disrespected you by carrying on a relationship (however innocent it was) with another woman behind your back. He should not have done anything behind your back that he wouldn't do in front of your face. And then to brag that he has had opportunities to be with other women and has thought about it, is just cruel. You don't deserve to be treated like that. He has a lot to do to make this up to you. Do not let him turn this around on you! Give him hell!

Answer 2

He seems to have been playing around ... Why would 3 guys pick up 3 women for any other reason than f**king them?

You don't say where the women were from - unless they were American Indians as I believe there aren't many other folk living around the Canyon - so I guess they were probably on vacation too (and had left their husbands at home) ... Everyone knows Vegas isn't the Vatican - I was there last year (Vegas that is!) - and that such things go on ... Maybe you should ask his friends for their stories and compare - there's bound to be some discrepancies which might confirm your fears.

Answer 3

Clearly something happen..... he kept in touch with emails and text messaging.
You are not wrong..... he's already planted seed of deceit into his head and now he's hoping to bluff his way out, if he gets away with it once... what's to stop the second....
But the point is this :-

Sweetie ... in situations like this you have to decide if you want to put your marriage into bigger troubles or do you want to deal with what's troubling you ?
Ask yourself :
1.Do you believe him?
2. Can you trust him again.? Do you want to trust him again?
3. If you stay , can you put this inccident in the past... and behind you ...or will it now make you fearful everytime he is not with you.
4. Has there been other sign or inccident that you did not see before, but now all seems to be making sense. ( Reflect on that )
Take your time to look into the impact this situation has on you and then when you ready .. you can sit with your husband on the understanding that this is his last chance to tell you the complete truth..... you will know what to do, from then on, all the signs will be there to help you make a decision, when you are focus on the situation and not your emotions.
Hope this helps you make sense and I wish you well.

Answer 4

I feel bad for you, I have been cheated on by my husband and he even took me into a Catholic church to swear in front of God that he didn't cheat. I went back to him, then his mistress came up pregnant, calling our house about having an abortion, it all came out. He was sleeping with her and I was the fool. Men can be pigs and don't realize the pain sleeping with another woman can cause. Be careful hon, if he went on vacation with two men and three woman, put it together..... something just isn't right. If I were you I would certainly have suspicion. If you can't trust him, try counseling or something, cause the dis trust inside you will only grow into a huge green eyed monster and eventually take over your life. Good luck.

Answer 5

You're not wrong and don't believe it.
He's saying that he has had chances and thinks about it all the time to make you think, "Well, oh, he's just thinking it in his head, he wont do it."
Use your womanly instinct; 3 guys pick up 3 women but nothing happens? Bull!
You need to leave his sorry ***. He is disrespectful, he most likely did cheat, and any man that thinks about having sex with other mean is a cheater in his mind and doesn't deserve to be married to a quality woman.

Answer 6

Trust him that nothing happened - especially now that the testing etc seems to have stopped - HOWEVER...verify that nothing else is happening. I think your husband was doing some heavy duty flirting and maybe "zipless" sex. I'd suggest a couple things;

1) Get off his back about his even thinking about another woman - there is no value in fussing at him other than pissing your husband off. He deserves to have the privacy of his own thoughts, just like you do.

2) You DO need to talk to him nonconfrontationally about why he was doing the texting etc. and let him know that it hurt your feelings.

I wish you Good Luck

Answer 7

No matter who you are, you shouldn't ever put yourself in a good position to cheat. The odds are you will. Therefore, when he went along with his buddies to Vegas, the odds became very good that he would cheat. Why else would you go to Vegas with women? Why not just the guys? I don't know your husband, but the fact that he thinks about screwing different women "all the time" would lead me to believe he would do it. Best of luck to you, honey.

Answer 8

I don't believe him. You don't take women on vacation and "nothing happening". Bull sh*it!!! And him texting / emailing for 2 months afterwards was the confirmation that YES something did happen. Do it back to him. Take another man on vacation and rub it in his face. He'll be singing a different tune then.

Answer 9

When you marry sombody it must always come with TRUST. marriage is not some kinda food that if you don't like the taste or if it is hot you just gonna spit out of your mouth. I do not know about your relationship but perserverance and goodness must be shown from you. Most of the times wives are the reason why men fall and they try to find that imperfection from other women. Show love and learn to listen.

Answer 10

honestly,,if he went with 2 men and 3 women that's a red flag Hun,,you will always have doubt no matter what he says. only they know what happen. you will always wonder.if any women were going it should have been you!i know they say you have to have trust to make it work. well that's over the edge and putting a man to temptation..personally i think a man on vacation with another women is wrong and i would try that shoe on and let him see how it feels. if not move on..lifes to short to be walked on. trust your heart.