I hate my mother!?

Question

We have some of my dad's relatives visiting, and she has to have the biggest mouth ever. She won't shut up and the only things I've heard her say about me aren't nice. She won't stop saying of how fat I am, she's telling them I eat a lot, and that I never help her around the house. WTF? I wish I could just run away from here. It hurts how she won't shut up about my weight. I may be a overweight, but I'm not obese or anything!

Answer 1

Choose a private time alone and tell her how you feel without losing your temper. Go over in your mind the things you want to say but avoid sinking to her level. Instead of saying "you this" or "you that" say "I feel" & "I want" type sentences. Dont play the blaming game just let her know how you feel without yelling!
Make light hearted comments like "I'm on a seafood diet - I see food and I eat it" your rels probably feel that she is too hard on you and will admire your spirit.
Dont run away

Answer 2

Moon, you poor thing.
Try taking your mother aside and explaining to her how her comments make you feel. Remind her that anorexia and bulimia are very real, very deadly diseases that very often take root due to just this kind of behavior.
You may also want to gently remind her that it is her job as a parent to educate you about nutrition and proper exercise. Let her know that you are open to exploring weight loss options (if you are), but not if it will be used as an excuse to ridicule you. Let her know that, no matter what your age, you deserve and demand to be treated with respect and dignity. You do! We all do.
In your mother's defense, she is probably trying to motivate you, although she is doing a poor job. She may also feel that she is being judged as a parent if everyone and everything isn't perfect. It's unfortunate that you are suffering because of your mother's insecurities.
Finally, remind her that by criticizing you, she is only making herself look bad, and more than likely she is making your relatives feel uncomfortable. I'm sure they are wondering what she is saying about them when their back is turned.
If that doesn't work, leave nursing home brochures around where she can find them and tell her you'll get the last word and the last laugh! ;) Good Luck, sweetie!

Answer 3

Mothers...who can live with them... I understand where your coming from. I am 21 years old and have depression and im adhd. All my life all I heard from my mom was the negitives. I ran away many times, only to be brought back by the cops which made it worst. I am a tad bit over weight, when someone says something about it I make sure they know I dont like it. I say sly comments like, "Yeah maybe I am fat....you know what I think I'll not eat till I'm as skinny as you want...." makes them think...or sit down with your mom..I know it sounds cheesey but sit down with her....tell her that all you hear is her talking bad about u. Mothers blow you off but they will think twice about talking...or say a sly comment when she says something bad like "if I had a nickle for every negitive thing you say about me...I would have enough to move out" online diarys help witht he venting also....myspace.com or Opendiary.com are good sites......hope things get better keep me updated :)

Answer 4

Next time she says something like that just kiss and hug her and apologize to her for not being the daughter she wanted, but, you love her very much. Trust me this will sting her like nobody's business. Sometimes the truth shocks people back into reality. For some reason she is ignoring that fact that even though she's the Mom, her thoughtlessness can hurt the most of all.

Answer 5

Don't run away from home or anything like that.
If you let her get to you, she will.

Just remember: "The person who insults you, is trying to cut you down to THEIR size."

Maybe SHE feels unworthy or fat. Maybe she is the one with issues and is just hiding behind you. Or, maybe she is jealous of your dad's or your dad's relatives' affection and love for you!

You have no reason to allow your self esteem to suffer because of her. Keep telling yourself that you are beautiful just the way you are. If YOU feel that you need to loose weight, then do it for yourself, not for anyone else.

After all, she is your mother, and as such you owe her your respect and devotion.
Good Luck and BE HAPPY!

Answer 6

Tell her what you feel, be honest about it. You two should work it out before it gets out of hand. Open up to her, give her the time to explain her side why she's like that to you, also give your side of the story and tell her everything that's bothering you and hurting you. Good luck ^-^

Answer 7

I would tell her to stop bashing you in front of your dads family.I would tell her if she has this big of a problem with you she can discuss it with you and your father not other family members.Tell her how much it hurts you and that she is causing you to hate her.

Answer 8

UNFORTUNATELY YOUR MOM MIGHT BE MAKING THE SAME MISTAKES MY PARENTS MADE WITH ME. I CALL IT NEGATIVE LOVE. THEY THINK BY SAYING THOSE MEAN AND NASTY THINGS ABOUT YOU, MIGHT GET YOU TO LOSE WEIGHT. IT OFTEN BACKFIRES AS YOU ARE HAVING ILL FEELINGS TOWARDS HER AND SHE IS NOT GETTING THE RESULTS OF TRYING TO HELP YOU. I SUGGEST FAMILY THERAPY TO GET THIS ALL IN THE OPEN NOW SO LINES OF COMMUNICATION CAN BE OPENED BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU.

Answer 9

Maybe you should talk to your dad and have him speak to her. Running away will not solve the issue.

Answer 10

yur mudder is hurting inside and just taking it out on you.i have been there ..it hurts...using your body to hurt you is wrong..i like chubby girls..they are cute and soft..but thats me..tell your mudder to stop it..but she wont ..tell her you feel her pain..and maybe therapy would help or maybe some large black..d*ick might get the job done..call doctor phill on her..