It started with a visit to a Chinese massage joint about 3 weeks ago. Of course the establishment offered a happy ending and I obliged. A couple days later I visited another establishment (not Asian) that advertised as a health spa in the local alternative paper. This place offered full nude hot tub massages. I soon worked my way through all of the "therapists" and have settled on two different ones. In the last 10 days, I have started visiting a strip club after work as well. I have been visiting the Chinese place during my lunch time, then going to a local gentlemen's club for private dances after work - and then visiting the full service "health" spa each night before bed. This has turned into a $600+ per day habit. I am less concerned with the money part and more concerned with what has suddenly "tripped my trigger". I am a 36 year old male going through divorce. My urge to partake in these activities is seemly out of control. What is wrong with me? Will it stop?
2006-09-19 01:51:33 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Koleebear - seems you may be on to something. I greatly enjoy the holding, touching, warm breaths that come with the sessions more than the sexual climax.
jassy - I don't know that I prefer these places or paying. I think it is more likely that the girls in these places know the experience I am looking for - and they provide it.
2006-09-19 02:51:07 · update #1
Hmmm 36 year old male going through a divorce, well my friend there is your answer. this sounds like a need for attention, affection, and love. the desire to feel needed and wanted. You are falsely thinking that this is giving you this. there are far less expensive ways of doing this Hun trust me I have been through a divorce and did some weird things LOL. This urge you have if you look at it is not about the sex, its about been with people who make you feel special, having someone touch you in a way that you had forgotten existed. On a more sinister note, you do need to stop this, if it turns into an obsession you re in trouble my friend. This can lead to all sorts of out of character behavior. May I be as bold to suggest you seek out a new hobby to fill this void you have right now. Join a local golf club to photography club or anything that interests you. Do not join a dating agency you are so not ready for another relationship, both of you will end up been hurt.Find something constructive to fill this void. Good luck
2006-09-19 02:02:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Birth control is not an effective way to terminate a pregnancy. If you are pregnant you could be severely damaging the fetus. Your test said neg. and those are usually pretty accurate if the test was done correctly. You have the option of stopping sex activities for a while to think this through. Think, don't just react, okay? Stay calm... Your symptoms are similar to premenstrual symptoms so keep that in mind. You may just be late. The pull out method is not effective b.c. (birth control) because pre-ejaculation contains sperm, which leads to pregnancy. Condoms and pills are much more effective. The pull out method is just a waiting game until it leads to pregnancy. You have to be on b.c. for something like a month before it is actively minimizing pregnancy chances. There are instructions and information readily available for b.c. pill use. There should be instructions on the container. The unprotected sex will very likely lead to pregnancy. If you are not planning to raise a child for the next 18 years, and then as an adult, for the rest of your life, you should take effective, preventative measures. This means reading instructions, considering what the consequences of your actions are, and acting in a way that is consistent with want you want, and do not want. Best Wishes!
2016-03-27 08:50:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OY! you're addicted! no actually you're trying to dull the pain of the divorce and cover it up with a physical "high". of course it is empty because there is no emotional fullfillment in it. i'm not sure if i would continue this behavior because of the cost, the health risk, but also because eventually, you'll come down and realize that it didnt help with what you're going through. you need to face the pain now, not later. try and get some counseling, talk to someone about how you're feeling about the divorce. sometimes its worth paying the 600 a day to talk to someone versus just feeling good for an hour. the high will last longer. God will help you get through this. Just ask him for his help. Blessings to you and it will be ok. you'll survive. i know because i've been there.
2006-09-19 02:09:27 · answer #3 · answered by Joyce K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, there is nothing wrong with you!
Being as u are going thru a divorce, its natural to want to explore what is out there w/o the worry of attatchment.
Seems you were sexually negleted for a while and now are making up for it.
Let it take its course, if money is not a worry then what the heck!
Enjoy it for as long as it may last but do monitor your finances as this, like any other addiction, can drain your bank account b4 u know it.
2006-09-19 01:57:05 · answer #4 · answered by koleebear 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your going through a divorce your life has changed. You found an activity that relaxes you. You'll stop once the money starts to run low and the excitement of going to the establishments gets tired.
2006-09-19 01:56:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's the divorce thing. your doing a rebound thing with lots of girls .Was your sex life inadequate when you where with your wife? maybe that's why. Or maybe , you just want to have sex all day long , and you don't have any one to do it with , so you pay for it. Question is Do you prefer these places over a normal sexual relationship with one person that you don't pay? You may have to go therapy if you want to stop this very addictive behavior.
2006-09-19 01:57:53 · answer #6 · answered by jassy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like a sex addiction. With the divorce and all, you're going thru a wierd time. This is why they have therapists. See one.
2006-09-19 01:58:00 · answer #7 · answered by Judy L 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't know if it will stop, but if you are going through a divorce this is something new I'm assuming and anything different from what you had is a bonus, hey what ever feels good(within reason of course)
2006-09-19 01:58:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
no man...its great i ve done the same thing for 5 years but not everyday only 2 times a month or so....you learn stuff when you sleep with women like that is a good experience for a man...nothing wrong with it....its just experience only dont get too used to it or you will have psychologigal problems cause women are for loving not just sex...
2006-09-19 01:56:00 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
you anwers your own question i will point it out for you i am a 36 year old male going through a divorce. get help
2006-09-19 02:03:02 · answer #10 · answered by michelle 2 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋