hi my problem is that im married for bout a year now and i seem to dread going to bed with my wife coz she always wants to sleep past two in the morning as she doesn work and i on the other hand have to get up at 7 for work, also when we in bed i can sleep till she falls off to sleep cos i must massage her off to sleep by rubbing her head or feet. Even when we on the couch watching tv we cant cuddle coz i must massage her.. if i must stop for 5 seconds she will get moody and upset with me, I really dont know what to do help me
2006-09-18 20:31:15 · 18 answers · asked by MOSES I 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Talk to her about it.
Tell her you need 8 hours sleep to function properly, or you can't do your job.
Tell her that massage time is before 11pm, and you are sorry, but after that you must get some sleep. If you become ill due to lack of sleep, what will she do then
2006-09-18 20:47:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok if you never had a heart to heart talk before now is the time . You should both sit down .And seriously talk about this .Because enough is enough when you have one side that has a problem to the point that your asking for help with your marriage. So obviously this has struck a nerve for you. It will not get solved until you first confront the problem . Your giving and not getting . A marriage dose not work that way .first of all you should not have to dread going to bed with your own wife and you,ve only been married for a year. And you have to massage her to sleep .So who massages you to sleep.And by the time you go to sleep Good it,ts time to go to work. And is she still asleep. If you love her talk to her and tell her how you feel . Maybe she dose not see your side of the picture.. Communication is so very important in a marriage. Or any relationship.I pray you both can work this out in love.
2006-09-19 04:27:46 · answer #2 · answered by boodababy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
erm your wife need to realize that you need your sleep as a working man. If you didn't work she would not have a roof over her head. remind her that marriage is about give and take and not just take. massaging her is fine but not every night of the week. maybe suggest that you do it on a Saturday night only as you don't have to get up for work the next day?.ask if you can have a massage one night a week also.massage is great foreplay but does not have to lead to sex. explain you love cuddling up with her on the couch but need to relax also after a long day at work. Your wife needs to realize that she is been very selfish, and gently suggest it may benefit her to go out and get a part time job then she could go to a massage parlor once a week with her wages.
2006-09-19 03:38:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
quit babying her. That's just crazy and ridiculous. You're the man, working and she's not doing much to help relax you or thinking of you at all. I'm sorry, but this woman sounds like the devil. Why, why, why would you put up with this when you're obviously such a nice guy??? Listen, you have to put your foot down and not do these things for her. She has you eating out of the palm of her hand. A marriage is supposed to be a give and take thing, not a give, give, give for one, and take, take, take for the other. If you keep doing this, your resentment is only going to build and then you'll blow ending in divorce. If you put your foot down, maybe she'll get pissed and again, end in divorce, OR maybe you put your foot down and she appreciates you more and respects you more, ending in a happy marriage. I know putting your foot down now may seem hard, but it's either that and get a divorce sooner rather than later, or putting up with it until you go insane and being miserable for an even longer period of time.
2006-09-19 03:47:04 · answer #4 · answered by t.larae 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun when you do things like messaging, is because you want too, not because you have too. If she doesn't work, shouldn't it be her messaging your feet. She needs to have some consideration about your needs as well, is not all her. I am sorry to tell you this but it seems she has you wipped, trained. If you have to get up at 7 then she needs to let you sleep. If it bothers you when she gets moody, then you get moody first. If she does not let you sleep, take your self to the sofa or the floor. any where far from her. You have to let her know this is bothering you.
2006-09-19 03:42:46 · answer #5 · answered by carabela 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are her husband not the massage parlor. Tell her you dont feel like rubbing her head or feet stand up for yourself. Let her know how you feel, dont let her walk all over you . How would she feel if she had to massage your head or feet all day think about it.
2006-09-19 03:35:22 · answer #6 · answered by shelly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send to a spa for a course of massages
2006-09-19 04:40:51 · answer #7 · answered by jaygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its always the same thing me me me well welcome to mthe club first you need to put your schedule in prospective she wants these things donne fine but what about you were you get yours this is a act were the pareticipation of both parties must come into play you seem to have a scheduling proble,m there is always the proper time and place tell her you want yours too................she sounds as if you are a vac you take out the closet only when she wants it
2006-09-19 03:38:37 · answer #8 · answered by rammesis2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A relationship is about the needs of TWO people, not one.
If she wan'ts to get, she needs to give. It aint rocket science.
You two need to have a serious talk.
Soon.
2006-09-19 03:34:52 · answer #9 · answered by Norton N 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Visit a marriage counseller.
2006-09-19 03:42:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋