What are good jokes for class and excuses for homework?

Question

A joke in class would be like clicking ur pen a bajillion times or stuff like that

I don't have my mathbook so i cant do my homework and I just like to hear these and if I have my homework but i forgot to turn it in during the beginning of class i use these

My favorites are:
My brother smoked it

I didnt do my homework becuase the apacolypse is right around the corner and i dont want to waste my time doign homework

Answer 1

tell you some jokes:

-Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what i just said.
-When did you first notice this problem?
-What problem?

One more joke:

A guy calls his vet and says "What should I do with my cat?Vet says "What do you mean? Guy says "I had a leak in my lawnmowers gas tank and the cat drank the gas. Then the cat began to run around and around the yard, climbed a tree. then fell out of the tree stiff. Vet says "Is the cat dead? Guy replies "nope he ran out of gas.

Last of all just want to tell you that whatever you do, just don't give up. Also you must love and care for the people around you. In that way they will also show you the love that you show to them. Just be yourself and happy everyday. Wish you all the best and good luck!!

Answer 2

There are no excuses. Seriously. If your dog seriously ate your hw, there's way to try again or be prepared for the failed assignment. I've had a few encounters with papers I've worked on for hours suddenly dissapearing, (hard drive crash or damn something)... but I didn't give up. I stayed up and did a second version, even though it was definately worse than the first. Some grade is better than none. And there's usually always time to find an altnerative for a second try w/out blurting the excuse. Otherwise, learn from it, and be prepared next time. **** happens.

Answer 3

Alex and constipation themes. How humorous. i'm getting attendance calls in college and you in user-friendly terms would not have self belief the indepth excuses I hear. often times I in simple terms want to assert "adequate already, that's in simple terms too lots training!" right this is a celebrity Suzie

Answer 4

I'm not good with jokes but I can tell you this:

Homework -

(1)
Well you see (teacher) I can't think when my stomach is empty, therefor I can't learn when I'm hungry. My parents are too poor to be able to pay for food, and our Food Stamps ran out. That's why I keep falling asleep in class, and I can't think therefore I can't do or finesh my homework.

(2)
Seriously I have a little bro/sis who's a baby and they barffed all over my homework this morning during breakfast. I assumed you didn't want proof because it might make you sick for smelling or touching the evidance. Since it was in the morning I didn't have time to re-do my homework.
Do you really want me to turn in homework full of puke?

(3)
IT's been hot the last couple of days, and my parents/bro/sis refused to turn on the AC in the car/truck/van. We were on the highway this morning to drop me off at school. They had the windows down, and !WooSH! all my school work flew out the window onto the highway! It was to dangerious they siad to go back, so I'm here now, homeworkless. Sorry.

(4)
This kid wanted me to do their homework for them, and at first I did it. But then I got tired of helping them cheat so I told them no. This morning they ganged up on me and jumped me. They took all my paper out of my book bag, saying they knew I had it and I wouldn't turn it over. In the middle of all this, they also took my Homework for this class too. Because I refused to do their homework, now I'm the one getting a bad grade on my homework!

Muhahahahahaha...
yes EVIL ...
;-)
Hey, don't over use these... if you use them wisely they'll work like a charm and ALWAYS get you off the hook...

just take these examples and come up with your own to add on LOL!

;-)

Cya!
::: Peace :::

Answer 5

I remember when I was in 5th grade there was a kid in my class who used to smear those "table talk" pies all over the top of his desk. Not really the best joke, but I still remember it 20 years later.

Answer 6

Clicking your pen a bazillion pen is not a joke.
This is a joke: one day, you'll be a doctor. LOL! You'll be flipping hamburgers, sweaty-tweety, for all your life!

Answer 7

Step one: get everyone to synchronize their watches, cell phones, etc.
Step two: everyone except for one person set for a given time. That one person sets for 30 seconds earlier.
Step three: when that person's cell or watch rings, the teacher tells him/her to turn off the noise and if s/he hears one more alarm...

Answer 8

Life is full of emotions like laughing, smiling, crying, weeping, fear, hatred, jealousy and many more. Out of all these, laughing is loved and liked by all. That is why someone has rightly said, “ You laugh and the world will laugh with u, you weep and you shall weep alone.” Sometimes, life becomes monotonous and one starts getting bored. To remove such monotonousness and boredom, I feel that surfing on the following websites can be helpful in making one cheerful, refreshen up and gain some emotional or psychological energy too. Surf on them and see how helpful these are to you to bring a smile on your face.
http://www.comedycentral.com/jokes/index.jhtml
http://www.ahajokes.com/
http://www.the-jokes.com/
http://www.lotsofjokes.com/
http://www.jokesgallery.com/
http://www.workjoke.com/projoke.htm
http://www.jokes2000.com/
http://yahooligans.yahoo.com/content/jokes/
http://www.xs4all.nl/~jcdverha/scijokes/
http://www.kidsjokes.co.uk/
http://www.ahajokes.com/yo_mama_jokes.html
http://www.allfunnypages.com/funny-jokes/yo-mama-jokes/funny-yo-mama-jokes.htm
http://www.africanjokes.com/africanjokes/?id_category=98
http://www.blonde-jokes.info/
http://www.zelo.com/blonde/index.asp
http://www.indiabook.com/jokes/Entertainment_and_Arts/Bollywood/

Please visit the above pages to find different variety of jokes. I hope, it helps you in making you laugh. Enjoy and have fun..

Answer 9

If you don't want to go to class you can tell your professor that your mom just got home from space and you had to go to Cape Canaveral to see her. It worked for my roomate!

Answer 10

so in other words you want to distract your fellow classmates from learning and not learn anything while you're in school?

grow up. get a life. focus your engery elsewhere. if you want to be a jerk, do it some place else. kids go to school to learn, not to have people like you hold them back.