Your thoughts on parents who try to butt-in on little league coaches?

Question

I just finished college and my playing career in football. I started a new job and had the time to volunteer to coach a 4th grade football team. Though it's my first year coaching kids, I have 14 years of football experience. This dad thinks it's his place to tell me how to coach and it's getting on my nerves. After every game and almost every practice this jack @$$ tells me what he thinks I should do. He makes up this B.S. stat sheet for games and gives me copies every Monday. He tells me about his 9 years of little league experience and his two championships he's won, which as we all know are meaningless. I'm not doing this for money or for wins, I just want to help kids learn to play football and have some fun. How do I tell this ****** to back off and let me coach?

By the way I only have 16 players and this is the first year for 10 of them. Your thoughts?

Answer 1

I used to cover sports as a sports editor and have dealt with many an overzealous parent, so I can totally relate.

You can try the pleasant route, convey to him how impressed you are with his dedication and that he should consider coaching his own team (even find one that needs his help).

Or, if that fails, you can try the whup-*** route and just tell him that you appreciate his input but that you'd really like to handle coaching the team in your own way. And that while you of course want to win games, your primary focus is on the teaching aspect of it.

Hope that helps. (It's not the kids who are the immature brats, it's their parents, isn't it.)

Answer 2

GOOD GRIEF!!
Congrats on taking a strong step into the coaching industry.

This is a very tough call...and it's one all coaches probably face at some point in their careers....maybe...
At least I have.

First...it's a great idea to have a parents night. And I can tell you haven't had one yet. I do this with out youth annex team.

This is a time to lay down the rules so that YOU the coach don't get stepped on.

One thing you learned in college ball was never let your opponent get in your head...you've done that ...this dad is in your head.
Now you can't coach without his influence.

So at the parents night...clearly outline why your there, make it clear this is not about stats, recognize that there are a lot of serious parents but that this is for the kids.

This is not a democracy where other parents get to air their views...this is the coaches introduction evening and where you stand.

After that...you have a right to have a team zone (no parents allowed) on the sideline...and then - as far as I'm concerned - any other pushy father gets the true Linebacker in me
and I roar
"SIT DOWN - OR I BENCH YOUR KID UNTIL YOU DO!!!!"

Fortunately, I'm still 6'4...240 pounds
and the only time that came out...I made the poor man cry...


When you take stat sheets from this father - you're encouraging his participation...you can either use this...or disuse it. Thats your choice...it's your battle - think of the end result in either case.

Remember your focus coach;
you're there to teach kids how to love the sport.

We have a team mom that is totally inappropriate in everything she does...but she sincerely tries her flakey little heart out and she isn't too domineering.
I made her a shirt - it says "Team Mom" and I made her responsible for team juice at half time and after the game.
It kept her so busy and out of my hair that I actually have an alley rather than a headache.

keep your power base - keep them out of your head.
Either use their meddling or send them packing...but make your decision an advantageous one.

Good luck - and have fun

Answer 3

First off you are right in every way. I have coached youth football and middle school track and in both cases had parents with far fewer credentials than I think I needed their input. Let him know it is your team and you will coach it your way. Try not to let him get to you, and always remember youth sports aren't really about the wins and losses, but the lessons that are learned along the way. Your main goal is to teach, about the sport and about being a good sport and teammate. If you do that you will be fine.

Answer 4

Well, try not taking yourself so seriously - it IS little league - and it'll be easier to be indifferent to his comments. Second, we all, including yourself, think we know more than the next dude - man's nature. I'm not belittling your football experience, nor your commendable effort to take time from yourself and spend it on the little guys - I pitch in and help with my son's coaches. I try not to make the coach feel as if I wanted to take over - cause I don't have the time to. If I was able to, I would put in to coach. I am not, so I just try and help the coaches with practices. Perhaps this dude is the same way. If he's just too damn annoying, tell him to put in to coach his own team next year!!

Good luck.....

Answer 5

I coached for 5 years. Parents had to sign a waiver that I made up. It pretty much stated that I was the coach, My decisions were final. And That i was available the second Sunday of each month for comments or complaints. Parents that broke those rules got to see their sons sitting on the bench or removed from my team.

Answer 6

There are self-important morons everywhere.
Ten years ago, my daughter was six years old and played T-ball.
Most of her friends, school chums and neighborhood kids were on the other team. When my daughter came up to bat, every kid on the other team started cheering for her.
The parents of the kids on the other team started yelling at their children to shut up.
What a bunch of slime-balls. I never took my daughter to T-ball again.
BTW- This happened in Gallup, New Mexico. I hope this gets printed in the Gallup Independent ( the local newspaper)

Answer 7

Tell him you appreciate his helpfulness but you want to handle things your way. If he does not like what is going on, then he should volunteer to coach. If all else fails, tell him to rack off.

Answer 8

well try to ignore him, but make it clear that you are the coach and have complete authority, just remember it's about the kids having fun and learning, and it might not hurt to remind him of that too

Answer 9

Little League is for fun, and it's for the KIDS. Unfortunately, you're dealing with an IDIOT who needs to understand that he is WAY OUT OF LINE. Tell him as forcefully as you can that he is SPOILING IT FOR HIS CHILD!

Answer 10

my heart go's out to ya for trying to mentor children.good job! tell this man to butt out,and if he wants to coach then take on his own team next year.i see this alot,parents need to let the coaches coach.but im afraid it will be never ending.but don't give up.i'll tell you thanks now,cause kid's need people like you.good luck!