Is it always necessary to always look into the person's eyes when they are talking?

Question

is it always necessary to look into the person's eyes when they are speaking? is it rude not to?

Answer 1

I don't necessarily think that it's rude not to. However, I feel much more comfortable and tend to be more drawn to remmeber a person if they look me in the eys when in conversation. It shows that they have confidence in themselves and that you're worth the time to actually stop and talk to.

Answer 2

It is very much a Western cultural thing. Many cultures have just the opposite convention - too much eye contact is considered quite rude. Do what is comfortable for you. If you can manage a little eye contact now and again just so that the person talking knows you are listening, that's great. But as long as you actually *are* listening and respond to the speaker in a way that lets them know you are (verbal responses, nodding, etc.) they will realize you are listening - you just have a different way of doing so.

Answer 3

*Who the heck is Bobby* has a great answer, by the way. I just wanted to comment.

I began making more of an effort to continue eye contact with people when I got some feedback from people in the county I lived in as a teen; it was before I started volunteering and working. Anyways. What one person said to me was along the lines of saying how "cute" "shy" and "demure" I must be for looking down and then up at people, and being unwilling (not unable) to hold eye contact. Another person thought I just hated to be around people at all and wanted to "get away as fast as possible" because I wouldn't look much when I was being spoken to. Neither things were true, so I began to make a conscious effort to look people in the eye. This involved shedding some other shy behaviors, and improving my sense of self worth. Good results were IMMEDIATE.

You don't have to look the entire time to show respect for a person, but if they're used to you looking them in the eye, and you start looking away, they're going to wonder A. what they've done wrong; B. what you've done wrong. And they should.

Answer 4

When I was young I felt that it was disrespectful to not look someone in the eye when they were speaking to me. I quickly learned that many people will talk for as long as you will let them and that not every conversation requires eye contact. I don't have time to stand at attention while people run their mouths. I'll ask "Do you mind if I continue working while we talk?" They always say they don't mind. Then I'm free to wash the car, change a diaper, whatever I need to do. Just look at them often enough that they don't feel ignored. Of course it would be rude to do that if you were being proposed to, someone is telling you about their dying mother, etc.

Answer 5

I believe it all depends on an individual and their personality. I for one is strong willed and when I talk to someone or they are talking to me I look at them in the eyes. It is just my way of letting you know that I'm listening and paying attention. I mean it all depends on the situation too. But not I wouldn't say that it is rude to not look them in the eyes.

Answer 6

Generally, that IS what you should do--but not constantly, because it's kind of weird if they're talking and your gaze never wavers once, because it looks like you're staring. Basically, just be sure to make eye contact once in a while, and nobody's going to think you're rude.

Answer 7

I always say if you can't look someone in their eyes while you are talking to them. Then you have something to hide.

Answer 8

If they are speaking directly to you and not a group it's rude to look away.

Answer 9

its a respect thing you should know that people are reading you when they look in your eyes and if you cant then they will take your for a joke

Answer 10

no, but if people don't makes a person think there hiding something. and usualy thats right, but what there hiding isn't always bad