divorice help please !!!?

Question

my wife hated me i understand fine but she moved out and took everything as well as my two boys
i never drank or abused anyone
we just had marital breakdown
help me understand ladies how can you destroy a man like this with out any regards to the way he may feel
we just didn't click fine i can deal but taking my life (kids ) away is wrong i was a good father and was there all the time for my little guys and always stayed home after work to play with them so my wife could go and do things
now she only lets me see them during my days off but she put them in daycare for 2 of my days off why would some one eliminate the childs father for no aparrent reason

Answer 1

because unfortunately some people are just hateful and selfish and they dont think about how they would feel if they were in the others shoes.. my suggestion to u is to get ur stuff together.. get a place with an extra room for your kids, get everything set up as if they were going to live with u , right down to day cares ect.. And fight for atleast JOINT custody..and i would fight to be able to watch the kids on ur days off that they go to the daycare, no sense in them being watched by strangers if they have a loving parent willing to do it.. u can ask the court for that right and i cant see them denying u that.. Im really sorry ur going through this, but not all women are like this.. i have custody of my 3 kids, and i give their dad all visitation possible.. they know all they have to do is give me alittle bit of notice and unless i have something major planned (which is a rarity) they can see the kids any time they'd like.. i tell my x everything about the kids, from doctors appts to school functions, i try very hard to keep him very active in the kids lives and promote their relationship..unfortunately my x husband doesnt take me up on those opportunities..as he is one of those men that like to only be a father when its convient to them..

My husband now feels ur pain , as he is in the same situation as u are..he feels his kids were ripped away from him and he can no longer read to them every night and kiss them every a.m. His x wife uses his kids as pawns in her sick games..and makes him look bad as a father every chance she gets even though he goes above and beyond for his kids..(he goes to doc appts, dentist appts, pays his child support, takes the kids any time she needs him to for whatever reason, there are time that we have the kids more then she does in a month..he buys them school supplies, school clothes, pays for field trips, goes on field trips if he can..sometimes if he doesnt have to work a day during the week he shows up to their school and has lunch with them.. he goes to open houses, and IF she tells him, he goes to all school functions he can if he's not working..
And he prays for a day that his kids will be old enough to want to come live with him...and for a judge to grant him atleast joint if not full custody of the kids, as right now he only has shared..

So just stay a good father, do all u can for your kids, let them know ur there, and never get wrapped up in things that divert urself away from them and dont let their mom stop u from being a dad, UR THEIR DAD and u have just as much right to ur kids as she does..

Answer 2

She uses them against you. The marital breakdown did not make you suffer enough. But the weakness you now have is the kids and she will use that against you. Obviously your both still not getting along even after the seperation. But you are entitled to full visitational rights as a parent.
You actually should get everything documented and bound by law . Whatever verbal agreements you may have always end up infront of a judge but never before the fights and inconveniances occurr.
The Loser Is? The Kids! If she feels really bitter about the failed marriage it will only grow worse.

Answer 3

stop playing her VICTIM you can go to ANY Juvenal court FILE a Lil something called visiting or joint custody. She dose not have to stay in a marriage she feels is bad because you have children. ACCEPT for WHATEVER reason you were not THE ONE for her. She has a right to leave!, you have a right!, to see your kids BY LAW she can't keep them from you. Why worry about WHY she did not want you. Just do what you need to to get a legal order over the kids to see them pay support and be a FATHER you don't need her to be a Dad. It's not doing you any good to whine about what a good non abusive husband you were POINT BLANK she moved on you do to. You can't change her feelings. I'm sure were not hearing any of your FAULTS this is pretty one sided question you paint her as the one who's wrong.

Answer 4

I am sorry to inform you that what you are experiencing is not uncommon. Unfortunately it happens most every time. Women for some reason think they own the children. They also like to play games with the visitations and for some reason think the children do not need a father. There is no reasoning with them and the courts always seem to side with them. That is why every man should fight for shared custody of the children, no matter how old/young the children are. If you think you have trouble yet, wait until she starts letting men spend the night.

Answer 5

Fight for your right to be a father to your children. Go to court and get visitation that is more equal. If you sit back and let this happen without putting up a fight it will only get worse.

Answer 6

Obviously she was thinking of being with someone else if she never wanted to spend time with you and were always gone leaving you with the boys. Dont blame yourself, she may not want the boys telling you things she may be doing.

Answer 7

if you are that good you can take her to court to get to see your kids more you can be the best man in the would and it's not good for some of them you being nice will get a new one soon good luck to you and the kids

Answer 8

SHE'S A BIT** SOME WOMAN DON'T DESERVE MEN LIKE YOU IF YOUR WERE A DEADBEAT SHE WOULD BE COMPLAINING BUT YOU SEEM DECENT I WOULD TAKE HER TO FAMILY COURT AND GET VISITATION RIGHTS YOU ARE ENTITLED TO THEM AND BEAT HER TO THE PUSH AND GO GET A COURT ORDERED CHILD SUPPORT CASE SO THAT SHE DOESN'T GO AND SAY YOUR NOT TAKING CARE OF THEM MAKE THE FIRST MOVES AND IF YOU DON'T GO WHATEVER YOU BUY THOSE KIDS KEEP YOUR RECEIPTS AND NEVER GIVER HER CASH ALWAYS $ MONEYS OR A CHECK AND KEEP COPIES OF THEM SHOWING WHAT THEY ARE FOR GOOD LUCK

Answer 9

Stop being a passenger and take control. Take her to court and get 50% custody.

Answer 10

Dont say a be conscious dont see this youthful guy back till finally the divorce is very final. sturdy success. permit his lawyer do his job enable them to coach wether or no longer you had an affair. purely dont ensure or deny something and allow your lawyer do his job, this abode grew to become into it yours formerly you acquire married? purely request it interior the settlement worse come to worse youll could sell and split the money till you want to pay him out ?