if i am pregnant, can my boyfriend tell/force me to have an abortion?

Question

I mite be pregnant and my boyfriend has told me he doesnt want kids. i want kids. he is alot older than me

Answer 1

He doesn't own you or your body. If he didn't want the responsibility of kids, he shouldn't be having sex.

Do not let him tell you what to do in this situation. If he is a lot older than you, then one way or another, you're going to live a life without him at some point.

Be true to yourself. A child is something worth being selfish about, if you're doing it for you and the child.

Answer 2

I think it would have been mature of you and your boyfriend to discuss these matters beforehand. Knowing he doesn't want kids and that there's a possibility you may become pregnant is a bad combination, especially if you know you want a family of your own someday. How can you possibly be happy with him, when he doesn't satisfy your ultimate goals?
From the few sentences you typed, I'd say he sounds controlling and selfish. It's not about him. It's about you, your baby, your body, and your future now. With or without him. He cannot force you into anything- So don't let him. If you do, two things will happen:
1. You'll think about the baby you aborted for a long time to come,
and wonder what could have been.
2. You'll give him more control over Your Life.
It's your life. It should be a happy one-make your own decisions for yourself. If you want the baby, then keep it. There are many men your own age around who are on your level.
"Second best is never enough, you'd do much better baby on your own...Don't go for second best, baby!"

Answer 3

He can say anything he wants, Freedom of Speech is something everyone can excersice in America. He cannot force you to have an abortion. There's a big difference between telling you you have to do something, and making you do it. Think about it, what's he going to do, grab you by the hand and drag you to an abortion clinic and tell them he doesn't want the baby and make them strap you down and take the baby out? No doctor would do that! Maybe in a third world but I'm assuming you're in the U.S.

You need to ask yourself why this older guy is having sex with you and never wants kids? That is really odd. Is it possible he just wants sex ? and no future with YOU?

Answer 4

No....

A woman has the right to choose what happens to her body no one else gets to choose....

However with that being said, If it turns out you are not pregnant, you and your boyfriend have the responsibility to make sure that adequate birth control (condoms, the pill, contraceptive sponges, contraceptive foam etc.) are used every time....

Your boyfriend has already said he doesnt want children while you say you do want children, Maybe this is a good time to re-evaluate your relationship and goals.. If you are afraid of being forced to have an abortion you don't want there is more wrong here than the prospect of an unwanted pregnancy on his part...

Answer 5

Honey the only one who can make the choice is you. You have the right to make up your own mind. If you want the baby you have the baby. I love my children and they were alll unplanned. I would never have had an abortion but that is me. They are a blessing everyday. Please also know that most states have a law so that the father can not just walk away. You can take him to court and get the child support and help you need. You can not force him to be the Dad but he will always be the father. Do what is best for you.

Answer 6

Absolutely not. It is your body, your choice, your life. However, you sound very young, so think long and hard about what you do. 18 years is a very long commitment. Whatever your feelings are about abortion, remember that there are many childless couples who would love to adopt an infant.

If you decide to have a baby against your boyfriend's wishes, be prepared for the extreme likelihood that he will then become your ex-boyfriend. Hopefully you'll be able to get child support out of him, but don't expect much more. Good luck! I think you'll need it. And cross your fingers and legs that you're not pregnant, and USE PROTECTION! You can DIE from unprotected sex.

Answer 7

If you were not ready to be a parent why were you having sex? Poor decision making is not the fault of the unborn child. You can always give the child up for adoption to 2 people who will love and protect the child not just 1 person. That guilt will fade a lot faster the guilt of abortion. And that is what a "real " pro-choice is all about.

Answer 8

I was an 18 year old freshman in college and I got pregnant by a guy MUCH older than me. He CONVINCED me to have an abortion. That was the worst mistake I have ever made in my life. I STILL feel so guilty. My child would be 14 years old now, in high school and giving me gray hairs!!! Don't let him do that to you. You will regret it. To this day, I have not been able to bear a child. I sometimes wonder if I am being punished for what I did.

Answer 9

No he can't, but you can deny him any rights to abort parental his responsibility for a child. You can make him pay child support, but you can refuse him access to the child, if he decides he wants to be a father, without major concern for legal backlash. He could want to be a part of the child's life, but you can move the child away, in most states, despite any objections by him. In many states, including Missouri, you can deny him access to the child for six months, then terminate his parental rights because he had not been seeing the child.

A child deserve a father, but it should be an involved father. Making him pay child support for a child he does not want is like making a woman raise a child she did not want.

There are no easy answers here. That is why you should not have sex with someone who you know doesn't want children, unless one of you is fixed.

Answer 10

Absolutely not. He doesnt even have rights until the baby is born and he signs the birth certificate, or has a test done to prove its his!! If you feel you're ready, then have the baby. It's your decision, whether he approves or not. You just might be on your own though if he really wants no part in it.

Good luck!