Is it cheating?

Question

Is it cheating if my husband went to a fULLY nude strip club and got lap dances? Also he spent $200 or more there. I know they don't serve alcohol, so how could he have spent that much?

Answer 1

No, it's not cheating.

And, $200 is a drop in the bucket. Depending on the club, entrance fees can be $0-$60, lap dances can cost $40-$60 each. And, that's for one song (about 2 minutes).

If he came home all reved up for you - congrats.
If he didn't, where did all that tension get released?

Answer 2

Some guys spend more than that if they have it. You'd be surprised. I think your hubby is looking for some for of entertainment that he is not getting at home. Maybe you are not a sexy dance vixen and maybe you are. He spent $200--that's a lot. A regular lap dance is about $20 depending on the place so he must have a favorite girl who danced for him only all night or he let a few ladies dance for him or (I hate to say this) he could have let a dancer who is also a prostitute give him some extra services. You need to be careful...seriously. As a matter of fact, plan a visit to the clinic. It is cheating if you think it is. Would he be OK with you going to a totally nude club giving $200 to male strippers? I do not think he would like it. You need to stand up for yourself and what you believe in. Also, was he going to strip clubs before you were married to him? If he was, this situation is not all on him. You should have put your foot down from the start and moved on if you had to. A piece of paper does not change a man and does not change his ways. If this is a new side of him, tell him he is hurting your feelings, disrespecting you, and spending money you could you for more important things. He had better be taking care of his family first and foremost before he goes putting dollars into butt cheeks.

Answer 3

Jen have you given your blessings for you guy to go to this adult club its probably just not cheating to him if your aware that he is going there, I mean after all that is what happens there women undress and offer sexual stimulation to grown men the how could he spend spent 200 dollars? that would suggest that it 1 was very expensive to receive a lap dance or 2 he had a few but don't forget tipping the dancers and admittance . I think that you have a problem with his behavior so tell him that you are are his woman and that all that is at home if you that is are prepared to give him the thrill he seems so happy with. Think you have more of an issue with trusting him than his poor behavior Its funny though my wife goes to guys afloat and Iv seen the happy snaps my shrinking violet turns into a racy red rose as some young guy gyrates in front of her but Iv never actually gone to a strip show It seems less offensive for the ladies to attend these than their men

Answer 4

It's not cheating sexually, it's cheating emotionally because you feel betrayed by his actions. He could have spent that much on lap dances (typically $20 for each dance, ~5 min) or giving the dancers money while they danced (typically $1, but I've seen a guy throw out $100 in $1 bills just to get the dancer's attention). Some upscale clubs offer back rubs while you sit and watch, but this doesn't sound like that kind of place. In his defense, it's easy to sit and give money to the girls and not realize how much you spent because the more money they get, the friendlier they are to you. It's much harder to say no to a persistent, smiling nude girl, as most dancers are rather persistent and it's sometimes easier to say yes and be done with them.

Answer 5

Yes it is cheating! A married man has no right to look at another nude woman. The only reason you would spend $200 is on a personal lap dance or more. I think you need to be asking for a good lawyer or counselor instead of the people of Yahoo answers.

Answer 6

Most clubs don't allow touching dancers in the club. Things could go crazy too quickly, and its also illegal in some states. If the dancer and customer make arrangements outside the club, that's their business, and yes, that would be cheating. It is definitely suicidal if he isn't using condoms, and totally irresponsible if he's coming home to you after a parking lot quickie.

$200. is moderate to average, depending on your location, in the way of tips for a few cute dancers, and even if he doesn't drink booze, other drinks are very expensive. Some clubs also have favors guys can buy for the ladies. Depends on how long he's there. $200. in a few hours could mean he's trying to impress one particular lady, and that's not good.

If you have good sexual relations and are comfortable talking about this, why don't you sit him down and ask him why he likes going? Why not suggest that you'd like to go, and see what he says? Some women go because it gets their guys revved up for them :-) , and they also can keep an eye on them. If you're comfortable with it, enjoy yourself and have a good time.

If you're not interested in going, or feel feel threatened by it, and he's reluctant to have you along, hire a private detective (They'll be lining up for this assignment.) Hubby may be transacting illicit business or maybe this is his way of enjoying a harmless fantasy. There's only two ways to find out--you go with him, or hire someone to check it out.

Answer 7

lol.. ummmm lets see how do u think he spent 200???? if thats the only place he went to, the most he could of spent on gas and food ect maybe 50.00 then for how ever many lap dances those can cost a decent amount to to mention all the dollars he threw up there while the girls were dancing, the more money he spends the more attention he gets from the girls..

Is it cheating, hummmmmm to me it is.. to me any married man that needs to go look at naked women is cheating, i think its disrespectful of his wife and totally goes against his wedding vows.. "FORSAKE ALL OTHERS" , didnt say "FORSAKE ALL OTHERS BUT THE LOCAL STRIPPERS.. lol..

If that was my husband spending so much money on strippers and getting lap dances and just going into a place like that.. especailly if it was with out my knowledge.. he's bags would be packed and sitting outside the door with the locks changed, with a note that says when u want to be a real man, and be a good husband let me know till then go stay at the hookers house.. since she has all ur money.. lol..

Answer 8

Yes it is cheating, would he like it if you gave a lap dance in a nude strip club. Or would he like it if you went to a nude strip club and received a lap dance from a guy and spent $200.00. I believe that when you are in a relationship don't do to your partner what you would not want your partner to do to you. If he felt that it was OK, would he do it in front of you or his mom??????

Answer 9

Everyone is different in their definitions of cheating but if you are asking my personal opinion - my answer is HELL YES! So what if he paid for them or not. If he got lap dances and full nudity from your neighbor or friend, would you still consider it cheating? Just because he went somewhere where they do that kind of thing doesn't make it any better. They money he spent there is ridiculous. I would get into marriage counseling or divorce if I were you and (no offense) ask your husband if your are meeting his sexual needs or find out if he has some issue.

Answer 10

Just because you window shop don't mean your going to buy it. Let a man be a man. I don't think it's nothing wrong with a man going to a strip club cause it's nothing but an illusion.. Hopefully, know guy believes that a stripper who's heard it all before can really want a serious relationship. Outside of getting some more money.. Let him know how you feel about his spending so much money at a strip club. Tell him don't get that damn excited. But let him enjoy his self. The problem is when he don't come home after the club.

Answer 11

ya i would consider that cheating if he had just gone to the strip club and just watced but didnt get lap dances then eh its your call but if he went there and spent 200 bucks he definitly got lap dances and thats definitly cheating even though hes not actually having sex with the women he should have more respect for you and not even go to a place like that.