Fussy baby?

Question

I have a 3 month old daughter who I love very much...just thought I'd throw that out there lol...but she wont lay down for a nap or go to bed at bedtime unless I'm holding her, or laying down with her...I know it was a bad habbit to start...but I just couldn't help myself...it's my first baby and I have held her pretty much constantly, but I'm looking for some tricks to help me because I can't get housework done or anything when I need to...her daddy works second shift so he's not much help lol but any ideas lol...sorry it's such a long question do you think she is too young for me to let her "cry" it out yet?

Answer 1

My daughter was like this and I couldn't stand to let her cry it out. Instead I bought a sling and carried her with me all the time. She was much less fussy and I was able to get more done because my hands were free. She also slept in the sling and I would slip it off slowly and lay her down in it (careful not to let it cover her face). My dirty secret was to pop on a Baby Einstein video and put her in the bouncer and let her watch it...it kept her attention for a long time! I was amazed. That was how I got my housework done.

Also, when she falls asleep in your arms do you lay her down immediately? If so you may be doing it too soon. I wait until they are in a deeper state of sleep they are less likely to stir when you lay them down.

I have provided some links below that really helped me when I was having a hard time with my daughter. You can decide or not whether they are right for you, but they offer alternatives to crying it out, which I didn't feel comfortable with.

Good luck!

Answer 2

I got into the habit of holding our daughter until she would go to sleep very early on. It got to the point that she wouldn't go to sleep unless one of us was holding her. Not a good thing at all when I'm the only one home and needing to pee!

One night I got frustrated and my husband told me to lay her down and let her be. This was when she was about two months old. She fussed for a little bit, but went to sleep soon enough. She has slept much better since then (barring the last week, but she's back on track now).

I would suggest laying the baby down in her bed and staying close. Lay a hand on her tummy, sing to her... calm her down and let her know you're there, but don't pick her up. It may take a while, but she will eventually get into the habit of going to sleep on her own and letting you get a few minutes to yourself.

Our daughter has a hard time falling asleep now if we're holding her. I actually miss it sometimes, but I know that this is best for all concerned.

Good luck!

Answer 3

My #2 baby was a lot like that! I dont think any baby should be let to cry it out! Have you tried a baby swing? I use to have to put #2 in it and turn it so he faced me. I know the doctors are going to bash me for this one, but maybe she's still hungry? A table spoon of infant rice cearal may help fill her up a bit and settle her. I don't think you can hold a baby too much! They need to feel secure and loved, plus they don't stay small for long! Another thing is those snuggly baby carriers work good too, make sure you find one with good shoulder padding! Good luck!

Answer 4

It really is an individual thing. When we had kids, we made a conscious decision to be there for them. We wanted to instill a sense in them that there was always comfort and love to be had from us. I'll admit that in moments of frustration (cause we all have those no matter the philosphy), we did try letting our kids "cry it out", but it just didn't feel right. Yes, we probably endured a MUCH longer period of time during which our kids counted on rapid response and longed for parental comfort -- on almost any pretext =) but, I would like to think that our kids have a level of security and confidence, in our love for them at least, that supersedes our convenience. Also, my 11 year old daughter read my response, approves and says HI.

Good luck.

Answer 5

She will probably have to cry it out.
Each time you put her down for a nap or bedtime, hold her, mayber rock her, get her calm. Lay her down, you may have to pat her a little, tell her you love her and walk out. She will cry but not for long, you may have to go back in but not for at least 10 minutes, don't pick her up, just pat her again or rub her back. It will take a few times but that is the only way she will learn. She will sleep better and so will you!
Good luck.

Answer 6

I was told by a pediatrician that at 4 months of age, an infants nervous system has developed to the point where they can handle a little bit of crying it out. Before that age, they really are unable to handle it. I would start out slow, maybe only allowing her to cry for 5 minutes or less. Over time she will learn to soothe herself. I, unfortunately, waited until my son was 7 months old, and was stressed out all the time! After he learned to soothe himself to sleep for naps, and bedtime, I felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders! It only took him less than a week to get it down. Good Luck! Hang in there... it will get better!

Answer 7

Your baby isn't fussy. Your baby is just smarter than you..lol First of all, I have 4 kids which are all grown now and they all turned out great. I had fussy babies too.

You HAVE to put your daughter DOWN. She can cry for at least 45 min. without hurting herself, and that's per my baby doc.

Right now she is really confident that crying will bring you running. Put her to bed and do your regular routine, give her a kiss and walk out of the room, AND DON'T GO BACK INTO THAT ROOM. Obv. she is going to start crying, and when you don't respond by coming into the room....she is going to get realllly pissed off ! She will at some point settle down a bit, and then she'll rev v up again....this will probably go on for a while. BE STRONG. She'll cry herself to sleep. You're not being cruel. You've got to do this, and better now than when she's 9 mo. old and has much more endurance.

When you do this at night, she'll also cry herself to sleep and will probably wake up during the night and do it again. Go into her room and check on her, whatever you'd normally need to do, but don't get caught in the cycle of her playing the game of seeing if she cries and she can get you into the room. Decide when you'll have to just let her cry through it because you know she's ok and really needs nothing but attention.

During the day, you cannot hold her all day. You have to put her down and let her cry it out. I think its important for you to consider WHEN its ok for you to PICK HER UP. Try to pick her up at a point when she's behaving and quiet, so she doesn't get confused and think that you're picking her up bcz she's crying.

If you are consistant, you have about a week of hell to go through. It will get worse before better. But YOU must win, SO TO SPEAK. You have to be the parent and we must teach our children that they are safe in bed, but we sleep with dad in the other room. Mom has work to do, and she can watch, but she has toys to play with to occupy herself. And mommy knows her baby's different cries. There's one for I'm hurt and there's one for get over here and hold me....It's tough being a mom. No instructions. Sit on your hands if you have to. be strong. Good luck

Answer 8

My oldest son who's 19 had terrible colic and cried until he replaced into 4 months old. It replaced into residing hell! he's now an extremely calm person and it takes lots to get him mad. i do no longer think of their demeanor whilst they are babies has lots to do with how they prove as adults. My youngest son who's now 14 replaced into the wonderful toddler, infrequently ever cried did no longer even prefer to be held lots. He now has an extremely short temper and is rather extremely angered. So for my little ones it replaced into the choice of ways they have been whilst they have been babies.

Answer 9

Slowly wean her...lay with her without holding her...then lay with her just a short time...or just be there and touch or stroke her to sleep without laying with her....see?
Or purchase a snugly. She can sleep on your back while you continue your work...she gets to be close to you and you get your freedom. Don't worry, when she gets tired enough, she will sleep.
And no, it is not good to let a baby cry for long periods of time. There are better ways...try a warm bath, quiet soothing words...slow motion...darker room...and she will fall asleep soon,

Answer 10

I don't believe that you can give a baby too much love or comfort. I suggest you put her in a sling and go about you're chores. I promise that soon enough she will discover a way to settle herself to sleep. Good luck!