my parents got divorced when i was three but they still talk and get along. My dad got the kids and thinks thats the only thing he has better than her. Im a teenage girtl who needs to be with her mom. how do i tell my dad i want to live with my mom not him.
2006-09-18 11:22:18 · 22 answers · asked by tee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well some of you guys are acting like my mom has done something wrong. My mom can see me tuesday - thursday and every other weekend. she's an amazing mom. but i live with my three older brothers and dad who are all italian and im the only girl . being a 15 year old girl just doesnt work. They treat me like im 5 and over - protect me. They only want to be there for me when they can be assholes. and i just things its time for my to be with my mom. it isnt fair to hre that she has lived with only seeing her daughter twice a weekend and certain weekends for 12 years. She needs me in her life just as much as i need her in mine. Im going through things my dad cant help me with and she can. How do i tell him i want to move in with her
2006-09-18 12:12:46 · update #1
Why? Your Dad has taken care of you for at least ten years. Why do you NEED to be with Mom? Couldn't your Mom have gotten custody- some time during the last ten years? As for how you tell him- there isn't going to be a good way to say, "Dad, thanks for being Dad for all these years- but now I want to live with Mom." I suggest you first talk to Mom. Does she WANT to be a full time Mom? If so, why hasn't she tried to get custody? Is Dad just being too strict? Sexually abusing you? Not letting you date a 40 year old guy?
2006-09-18 11:49:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A teenage girl needs to be with her mother AND her father. That's not completely possible now and it is understandable that you would want to have your mother as a bigger part of your life.
You don't mention if your parents live in the same area and how much visitation your mother has now. Do you see her on a regular basis? Perhaps more extended visitation or joint custody would help you meet your needs?
In any event, if you tell your father that you want to live with your mother and not him, he is going to feel that you are rejecting him or that you think he is an inadequate parent, or that you don't love him, etc. He will probably be defensive and angry. You will need to make him realize that this is about YOU and not about him. I would explain to him your feelings - why you feel you need to be with your mother at this point in your life. Why it is best for you. Then ask him how this can happen without hurting anyone. Make him know that you still love him and want him to be a part of your life, but that you also love your mother and need her in more in your life at this time. Try to get him to figure out how to help you be happy. See if you can't let it become HIS decision, based on his desire to do what is best for you.
Good luck!
2006-09-18 11:40:54 · answer #2 · answered by Xeod 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It do not sound like your waiting for, you opt to be seen through a doctor and there are loose clinics that you'll pass to in maximum cities. once you make certain it both way you could make the alternative about what to do. i do not understand if i'd have my moms and dads undertake, it would should be with the youngster continually understanding you're the start mom. in case your round even if in case you do not have custody, and also you stay on the point of the youngster and the youngster is raised with the reality you'll have a toddler with a miles more beneficial positive feeling about themself. the concern of no longer telling the daddy is he is going to ought to entice close sometime. per chance no longer until eventually he's were given his head screwed on straighter than it really is now. yet he will opt to entice close. Your toddler desires to entice close also who the daddy is. even if if he under no circumstances receives it mutually a toddler will resent being saved from the reality. that's ok even as their youthful yet trust me when I say they hit the youngster years and Lord what a large number you'll have on your palms, or you moms and dads may have on theirs. the youngster desires to entice close even if if the guy is a jerk, the youngster should be raised understanding who he's and as he grows he will understand what he's. a guy or merely yet another sperm donor. yet first issues first, get looked at, earlier you panic. I favor you each and every of the success interior the international, and furnish an extra beneficial piece of recommend. in case your no longer waiting for, do not stay with this guy, do not take the danger the subsequent time it may well be powerful and think ofyou've got already stated he's no longer the great and also you doesn't desire a toddler through him. New Years is the following, initiate clean., and God Bless.
2016-10-16 01:16:19 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi tee,
You sound like you are a mature young lady and you know what you want. If your parents are on good terms it shouldn't be a problem with you sitting down with the both of them and telling them how you feel. Make sure your mother is with you when you decide to make that move. If your father loves you like that he will understand that a young lady needs her mother at this critical time to teach her how to become a young lady and respect herself as so. He will understand that he can not teach you how to do that. I don't know the situation between them but you have a choice, to make this decision and no one can stop you. But the way you explain it here you love your father very much and you don't want to hurt him. Just tell him that you love him very much but you want to learn to conduct your self as a young lady. He will still love you no matter what decision you make. It won't stop you from coming to his house on weekends, special occasions and holidays. He's still going to look at you as his little girl. If you dad refuse to let you go ask why, He might have a good reason.
2006-09-18 11:47:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just go tell him. It's not his choice. Do you know your mother? What has he said about her? Haven't you been in contact with her? Why doesn't she have joint custody? Don't worry about his head trip. He'll have one. You need a mother or a stand-in.
Your father is thinking in your best interest. You can solve this together or be in conflict over it. What do you want? You need to hang with an older female mentor if you mother can't play the role.
This is really sensitive. You have rights but you also need to remember, your mother may be a very bad influence on you. You need to know more about her before you make that kind of decision.
Your father has to know if you don't see her, you'll next be looking for a post to lean on, like a boyfriend.
2006-09-18 11:40:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sit down with your Dad and tell him how much you love him, how great it has been living with him, but you need to be with your Mom right now. Explain to him briefly that you are a teenager and there are things that you aren't comfortable sharing with him....girl stuff! If he loves you as much as a Dad should, he will understand. Try to talk to him calmly, so he knows that you don't want to leave him as a Dad, you just need Mom most right now. Good luck sweety! :)
2006-09-18 11:33:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell it like it is dont leave n e thing out bout what your feeling. You know and he'll understand like make an example tell him what if your parents got divorced and you were living with your mom and got older wouldnt you want to live with your dad? And he'll understand he'll just worry that you guys wont be that close n e more or you wont visit him. ok
2006-09-18 11:28:05 · answer #7 · answered by latina_lachula 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start by telling him that you feel like you can be honest and that you think he should know how you feel. Then just say it and see what questions or comments he has. Tell him that it isn't anything he is doing wrong. You just wonder what you are missing. Tell him you know he will always play an important role in your life no matter where you live.
2006-09-18 11:26:38 · answer #8 · answered by Steve M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him u love him and appreciate everything he does 4 u but u would like to live with your mom who u miss and need right now he sounds like a good dad so he will prob b ok with it just let him know u wont 4get him
2006-09-18 11:35:36 · answer #9 · answered by sarah71397 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just be honest and maybe say dad you know i love you and i thank you for being a great father and i will always love you for that but dad i think that its time i go live with mom i need her dad and i wanna be with her and assure him that you will still be his baby girl you just want mom also
2006-09-18 11:31:04 · answer #10 · answered by ladyrena12 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋