is it wrong for me to want to pay for our wedding?

Question

im the guy, traditionally its the brides familiy that pays most the cost but its our wedding and if we want something i dont want the parents saying its not in our budget. id rather pay for our perfect wedding

well i plan on paying for it not my wife im using my money i saved from iraq and im planning most of it cause i want it perfect for her. im using her ideas she gives me and goin from there.

Answer 1

the fact that it is the tradition that the bride's family pays for the wedding, you can approach your in laws and tell them that you would like to pitch in to the budget so that you can afford the wedding that you both dreamed of.

Answer 2

Tradition has gone out of the window a long time ago. Most of the time, the man and women are working and pay for their own wedding, with parents' help if they want. If you pay yourself, no one can tell you what to do - but it is nice if you still keep your families' wishes in mind.

Answer 3

You're correct in saying that traditionally the bride's family pays for the wedding but in today's world, it's not unusual for the bride or groom (or both) to pay for their wedding.

Answer 4

I would say no. I just got married and to be honest with you, me and my husband paid for EVERYTHING, including some of the weddings gifts people offered.

If you feel comfortable in accepting some help then take it, because a wedding, no matter how small you try to make it, always is expensive.

But like my husband said "If no help comes, the better we will appreciated and the big plus is we can do anything WE want"

Answer 5

I say go for it. It is ya'lls wedding, not the parents. You and your wife should have the wedding for your dreams. Good luck and I wish you and your fiance a long and happy life together!

Answer 6

More information, please. Like who are you in the relationship, who else has offered to pay or chip in, etc.

*******************

Sorry it took me a long time to add on, but I don't see a problem with you wanting to pay for it yourself. But I also don't see a problem with accepting help from family also, unless you are better off then both your parents.

I'm tying the knot in 3 1/2 weeks and we are mostly paying for it ourselves, but talking a little help from his parents.

If you are able to, and you don't want to feel obligated to have the wedding their way rather then your way, then by all means, pay for it yourself.

And congratulations!!!

Answer 7

not at all - but if either set of parents offer to contribute then politely accept & maybe say something along the lines of "
"" would you be prepared to pay for the flowers/cars/cake?? "" something specific that would be within their budget & they feel they have contribute to your day.
above all ENJOY your day

when my daughter got married - I paid for the fabric for & made her gown. they were going to go overseas for their honeymoon so her father paid for their passports.
apart from that they paid for most of it themselves - but reduced costs by asking guests to pay for their own meal at a restaurant rather than giving gifts

Answer 8

No. If you ever do that instead valuing that gesture the girl and her family will consider that you are buying them out and desperate to get her. So follow the traditional wisdom.

Answer 9

are you the guy or the girl? tradition the girl family pays. but the way men are they should pay. since they are the cost of the divorce when it happens.

Answer 10

I agree with you I am getting married in May and my fiance and i are paying for everything!!! I don't want anyone coming back and i did this and i did that or we can't afford it.. There is nothing wrong with it.