My daughter's dad is my ex-fiance. We were together for 6 years, broke up for 7 and somehow found our way back to each other. The day before I found out I was pregant he moved a couple hours away. He was my first love and I haven't had serious relationships since him. I told himhe was a daddy and didn't hear from him until I was 8 months pregnant. He said he wanted to be around. Sweet. He called when she was a week old an nothing til she was 4 months old, and nothing again til 6 months. Well he's seen her, and everytime he asks if I'll move over there to make things easier on him. He's even asked me to tell the child support people that I really don't know who the dad is and he promises to give me money. Anyway, my question is should I keep taking her to him, and trying to make it easier on him or should I just not do anything anymore and let him buck up. I know how he is and if he feels backed into a corner he'll react. I don't want it to cause my daughter pain. Help!
2006-09-18 06:44:51 · 7 answers · asked by wonderwoman41477 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I have a 9 year old son whose father is a complete dead-beat, living in another state.
I take my child to Florida twice a year so he can see his father.
I do this for my son. I want him to know that he has a father who loves him. I bend over backwards to help his father be a dad.
I don't do this because I am nice. I do this because when my son gets older, he will find the truth out for himself, and I don't want to end up looking like I kept his dad from him.
Oh, and the child support issue? Do you want to perjure yourself and keep the money your child is entitled to from coming to you?
2006-09-18 07:39:39 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have your child still have interactions with her father.Yet it seems to me that he wants you on a yo-yo.One minute he wants you the next he does not. And yet you still give him the time of day.The child support thing that just proves that he does not want to be held any responsibilities for anything and is still like when you met him immature.You should keep the child support, know for sure you want him gone and just in your kids life.Make a visitation schedule see if he abides by it, if not then he does not want to be aroung and let him be. I know it is hard raising 2 kids on your own. But there are many women who are a mom and dad and there kids grow up being kick *** kids.
2006-09-18 13:52:33 · answer #2 · answered by Amry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say, don't make it easier for him. He needs to be a man and step up to his responsiblity! About child support, go through the courts! You want that to be garranteed! He may say he'll give you money, but if there is no courts overseeing it, it may not happen. Your child needs and deserves that money. ANY man can be a father but it takes a real man to be a daddy!! He needs to grow up and realize that he's a parent and being a parent requires sacrifices, tell him to move closer! You don't need to make it easier for him, he is a grown man!!
2006-09-18 13:50:45 · answer #3 · answered by faith 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My wife told the child support people that she did'nt know who the father of her first child was.Yes he promised to give her money if she did'nt turn him in, it was aconstant battle for her to even get necessities from him.when she finally gave up on him and went to the child support people ,they really gave her a hard time about why she had lied to them earlier. You are gonna have a ccomplicated enough life from here on without catering to this deadbeat sounding guy . He should make things easier for U.
2006-09-18 14:05:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First don't worry , if you worry you little girl picks up on that energy . If he has a true desire to see her , he will fly around the world too, that what love does to people. You have to think about how you feel about getting around his schedule rather than following your own? You girl will be happy if your happy because that's the energy you will have in the house.
2006-09-18 13:58:02 · answer #5 · answered by Tellie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he should pay his support as the law dictates and do not let him out of doing so.
Make it as easy as possible for your daughter to have a relationship with her father. That is important, one way or the other.
2006-09-18 14:00:13 · answer #6 · answered by Carp 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SOUNDS LIKE HE IS TRYING TO SHMOOZE YOU. WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE THINGS EASIER FOR HIM? HAVE THINGS BEEN EASY FOR YOU?
VISITATION AND CHILD SUPPORT ARE TWO SEPERATE ISSUES, MAKE HIM PAY CHILD SUPPORT, DO NOT TRUST THAT HE WILL LIVE UP TO HIS END.
TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT YOUR QUESTION, DOES'T SEEM TO BE VERY RELIABLE NOW, SO WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN CHANGE HIM??
2006-09-18 14:08:48 · answer #7 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋