I was friends with this girl for many years and about 8 yrs ago she slept with my boyfriend who is now my ex ( has been for 8 yrs now ) ,We stopped being friends and now she wants to be my friend again. I am skeptical about it because I feel like she'll do it again. This happenend 8 yrs ago , do you think she'll do it again ? Or do you think I have nothing to worry about. I forgave her but I did not forget about it.
2006-09-18 06:10:50 · 20 answers · asked by ♥ Army Wife ♥ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Yes , we were very good friends. Best Friends , and I was always there when she needed me but I cannot say where she has been there for me when I needed her.
2006-09-18 06:27:04 · update #1
Whats in it for YOU!!!
Have you missed her fiend ship? (i left out the "r" on purpose)
and what kind of friend is that, who does what she did?
I hope you dumped the boyfriend right away also.
It doesn't sound like you really need to have this person in your life again. it has been 8 years, why pick a scab off an old wound.
Its wonderful that you can forgive, do you really need to start this up again and have to forgive all over again?
a Leopard doesnt change its spots and a Zebra doesnt take off his strips. I wouldn't trust her as far as i could throw her.
Just wish her luck and and say goodbye.
2006-09-18 06:39:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I look at it like this...It's great that you were able to forgive her, but that doesn't mean she has to be your friend again. She chose to sleep with your man which meant she didn't value the friendship she had with you. Screw her. She messed it up. All you would be doing is taking a risk by letting her back in your life again. I would say don't do it. You've been doing fine without her these past 8 years so continue on without her. You don't owe her anything and more than likely, she is just trying to make amends with you so that she can forgive herself...Oh well, that's not your problem...that's hers.
Screw her. You did your part...You forgave her. But you don't have to forget and it's not written anywhere that you have to be friends again in order to truly forgive.
2006-09-18 13:14:09 · answer #2 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends on you really, if you two were really good friends back then, then maybe you should forgive and forget and give her a second chance. But if you two weren't really that good of friends then I don't know if you should. However, 8 years is a long time, people can change in that time. If you were really good friends, then maybe you should give her a second chance. Just make sure, if you have a boyfriend now, that he stays away from her, haha I'm kidding about that though.
2006-09-18 13:18:24 · answer #3 · answered by TheFireWithin 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The loss of a friend over a boyfriend for one should never take place! If the boyfriend is going to cheat on you with a friend of yours, he's truly not worth having in the first place! Have this friend back in your life and let her know she did you a favor when she taught you this lesson in life and let her know that a friendship is more important to you than a cheating boyfriend! A boyfriend who's truly your boyfriend won't mess around on you anyways especially with your friend!
2006-09-18 13:20:16 · answer #4 · answered by shelly_mo67 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I agree that you can forgive, but never forget. At least you are at peace with yourself for forgiving her. Both of you have grown up a lot and your lives have changed. Get to know each other again (coffee, little talks) then go with your gut feeling if you want her for "good friend" again.
2006-09-18 13:17:38 · answer #5 · answered by Hammer 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can be friends again, just be really careful about it. Sleeping with a friend's boyfriend is a pretty bitchy thing to do but it's been 8 years, maybe she changed. Give her the benefit of the doubt but when she starts acting shady, dump her.
2006-09-18 13:12:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgivness is important for your sake, but I wouldn't trust her enough to let her into my life again.
Trust is important in any relationship-how would you be able to trust her? Would you want to be in a relationship with the guy she slept with?
Eight years is a long time, and people do grow up, but that is a biggie. Think about it carefully!
Good luck!
2006-09-18 13:17:46 · answer #7 · answered by Kailey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People always deserve a second chance, some people can change. But , unfortuantley chances are she hasn't and if she is willing to do something like that to you once, then she will probably do it again. My advice is maybe take the friendship slowly and see if you can trust her again.
2006-09-18 13:14:06 · answer #8 · answered by TRISHTHEDISH76 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if she did it once, she may do it again...you can forgive her but just be more and extra careful of her...maybe that time she was young and immature to think as it was 8 yrs ago..but anyway, if u accept her friendship again, make sure you be careful =)
2006-09-18 13:16:01 · answer #9 · answered by elektra_1286 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In order to truly forgive you have to forget.
Second chances are hard to come by
so help her out and give her a second try
what do you have to lose?
you could lose the best friend you would've ever had...
2006-09-18 13:14:08 · answer #10 · answered by Hex W 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋