Well him and i have been together for 4yrs and have a daughter together.We seperated for 4months in different states, now ever since he came back he keeps talking as if i want to take my daughter here or there i will you will not stop me becuse i dont like it when she goes to her aunts house cause there is drugs. Im not willing to lose my daughter and he keeps deffending her.. I want to finish school and I have to pay for it that fine in all but he wants me to stay home to take care of the baby instead of getting a job. Then tells me that your school is last in my mind and he has made it so hard for me to go to school anymore for my GED. It's werid (like a gut feeling) sometimes I really do think im mading the biggest mistake getting back with him. My best friend yes he is a guy we've known each other ever since we were 2yrs old and were both 18yrs now. My b/f get jelouse and pissed off if i talk to him or have anything to do with him. I don't knwo what to do
2006-09-18 02:56:47 · 11 answers · asked by Kristy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You may have made a mistake getting back together with him, but you can't dwell on that. You did what you thought was right at the time. You need to figure out whether you want to stay with him now though. Ask yourself what he brings to your relationship. He seems very controlling and it doesn't sound like he supports you. That is not good.
As far as protecting your child-that is your God given responsiblity!! If he is willing to put your child in a situation that could be harmful, then shame on him! But, don't you let it happen!! You HAVE to protect that child!!
Go back to school! Get your GED! Sometimes you can find places that offer free child care while you are going through the classes. Regardless, you need to go to school. This will only benefit you and your child in the future and you need to be able to provide for the two of you in the event he is not there to do so.
Of course he is jealous of your friend. He sees another man being there for you in the way he should be. Anyone would be affected by this. However, he is also trying to control you due to his own insecurity. His problem, not yours.
Be strong hon! Do what you have to do to better yourself for you and your child! Your life is not about doing what he wants you to do or not do. You are your own person!! Good Luck!
2006-09-18 03:21:02 · answer #1 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it comes down to what you really want. Are you happy? Do you have a good time together? You didn't mention any.
Big decisions are hard to take in life. We tend to go along with what we have being afraid of the change. From what you telling, he is jealous, he doesn't respect your wishes..I'm willing to bet he has no idea about your dreams and hopes.
Do you have an option to make it on your own? If you would be alone, could you support yourself and the kid through school?
I would say you need to have a serious talk with him. Tell him what you want, what you expect from the future. Don't settle for less. If you want to make something in your life, right now might be the time. It might be hard, but in the long run , if he is not the guy, you will suffer a whole lot more than starting all over right now.
2006-09-18 10:10:26 · answer #2 · answered by Portos 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like your boyfriend is being very supportive of you and that's never a good thing. Your desire to go back to school is OUTSTANDING! DO IT! It will help you build a better life for you and your daughter.
As for your male best friend, I am a guy, I have a female best friend and I've taken some crap for it. (Jealous boyfriends and such) We've never done anything. Just friends and I'm damn glad we've remained so. Anyway, if you boyfriend really loves and trusts you than your friend should not be an issue.
Bottom line: You need to take care of yourself first! Go to school, be friends with whomever you want to be. Your boyfriend can say in your life, but it is YOUR life and he will have to accept that. If he can't, he can leave. And DO listen to your gut. The gut tends to be a good predictor.
2006-09-18 10:04:22 · answer #3 · answered by danl747 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to do what is right for you and your daughter now, and not worry about him too much. if he is holding you back it is because he is worried you could do better for yourself and maybe find out that the world doesnt revolve around him. you need to go to school to better yourself so you can provide for you daughter.
Dont allow your daughter to go anywhere around drugs, God, if the place got busted they would take your daughter and put her in foster care.. you dont want that to happen, hold her close to you and only leave her with people you know you can trust and wont allow her to go with her dad, like you other friend........ sounds like her has his head screwed on the right way!! no chance of you hooking up with him??
Good luck!
2006-09-18 10:08:39 · answer #4 · answered by Debbie H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are questioning this...then the answer is YES..you made a mistake getting back with him...if it was right, there would be no question...anyone who makes education and growth hard for any individual to achieve or who is not supportive of it...BEWARE..they are very insecure and controlling...you do't need that...get out now...get your education and focus on you and your own family and what is best for ya'll...
2006-09-18 10:07:15 · answer #5 · answered by flyingnurse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a very hard situation, you are very young, if you dont feel good with the father of your baby you dont have to live with him....you are starting to live so try to be alone for a while if your best friend is a guy your husband have to be jelaus thats logic.....so analize your situation ask your parents for help....dont ruin your life!!!
2006-09-18 10:01:08 · answer #6 · answered by haki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it was a mistake goin back - it usually is. My advice is to leave and finish your schooling and take care of your child. it is obvious that he is immature and is threatened by the fact that you are trying to do something to improve your future. he should be supportive of you finishing school. he is being controlling and trying to keep you down.
you keep striving to improve yourself and get a better life for yourself and your child. good luck
2006-09-18 10:02:32 · answer #7 · answered by island3girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hes trying to control your every move. He doesnt want you to work because he wants to know where you are at ALL times. He sounds very abusive. You need to get very far away from him. Dont let him ruin your life. You will be sorry if you stay. GET OUT!!!!!!
2006-09-18 10:00:21 · answer #8 · answered by michelle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what's best for your child and your future. He is controling and is content being a loser. If you want to better yourself for the sake of your child leave him.
2006-09-18 10:07:10 · answer #9 · answered by grudgrime 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of the child do whatss best
2006-09-18 09:59:42 · answer #10 · answered by phil d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋