Should I ring the other womans number?

Question

My husband was on a boys weekend, when he came home i used his phone and saw that he had phoned a woman at 1 in the morning, he had also received a call from the woman 10 mins before that. i felt sick. I had to question it and he tried to lie at first then said that they had met a group of girls - where having the crack and that his number was given as a point of contact for them to all meet up the next night. ( i doubt this !)
He has said so many different stories. The best thing is he lied initially because he said he did not want to cause any problems but he only deleted her name in contacts and forgot about the dialled numbers.
My head is in bits as to me, to give a number out and take a number is out of order. He has promised that nothing at all has happened but because he told me lies and just dug and dug himself into a hole, i dont know what to believe. He doesnt know but i still have the number, Should i ring and ask her or should i just leave it be now.

Answer 1

Hello Top Cat,

I would not call the other women. So what should you do:
It depends on what you want. Assume that he did something wrong. Would you forgive him for it when he takes responsibility for it or would you break up. In the first case, keep talking to your husband. But do it in an open environment. Ask him with appreciation what has happend (not that you have to appreciate what has happend). Tell him that you want to believe him, but there is just this doubt. Tell him that you really want to make your marriage work, but if he doesn't talk about what happend and why he did it, it is not going to help. Tell him how you feel!
And also investigae what this feeling is inside of you. Is it insecurity, anger, frustation, ......

If the second case is what you want, than I do not know what to do.

Hope you will deal with it!

Being honest is really a question of courage - courage enough to face what you fear. (Copyright - Harry Palmer)

Answer 2

I got my ring sized to a 5 1/2 but I feel like my finger varies so much throughout the day, sometimes I think this is way too big and might fall off, other times I can see it leaving indentations in my skin. Weird I know. I actually went 1/4 size smaller than what I measured because I wanted to make sure it never slipped off. I have only been wearing it for 5 days, but I know many people whos fingers will actually conform to the size of the ring after a while.

Answer 3

Man, that really sucks. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I can understand your desire to phone this woman. It might not be a bad idea. If nothing else, it will let her know that YOU know about her. However, you need to understand that if you were to ask her what happened that night, you have no way of knowing if she will tell the truth. I'm not saying the worst DID happen, but if your husband really did cheat on you, he may have called her since you confronted him and given her a story to cover himself...you just don't know and really have no way of knowing with any certainty.

If this is effecting your relationship...which seems to be the case...maybe you should consider counseling for you and your husband. He owes you that much.

Good luck to you.

Answer 4

This is bothering you a lot because your husband wasn't up front with you. It could be nothing, flirting or something more.

I would call the number and speak to the woman. This will at least put an end to your wondering what happened, but be prepared for the answer.

Answer 5

What have you got to lose if you call her and tell her that he's your husband and you weren't sure that she knew that. And that you didn't want to embarass her at all; just set the record straight. Be kind. I don't see any harm in that. And I'd let my hubby know that anytime I found a number ANYWHERE, I'd be calling it. OR...better yet....call her while he is there and tell her that your husband wants to talk to her, then hand him the phone. OH YEAH...that will make him pee his pants for sure! Godloveya!

Answer 6

CALL NOW!!!! Been there and done that. Let her know that he's married . If he lied to you he probably lied to her too. If you still think something is going on later leave as fast as you can. If they cheat once they will cheat again because they think they can get away with it.

Answer 7

Ring her and ask her but pretend that you're your husband's sister...not the wife. Do ask her and tell her something like he's left his cellphone at home and you can't find him, and would she know where he was? Do follow up and don't let your husband get away with cheating. He might not have done anything but he did try....so give him hell!

Answer 8

Why bother.....everyone can see that you dont trust him, what makes you think this woman is going to tell you the truth anyway.....let it go......and maybe try giving him the benefit of the doubt,,, maybe nothing really happened.....unless he has given you cause to mistrust him before then leave it alone.....

why are you still there anyway if you dont trust him.....?
no trust = no love .....just leave and get it over with, why put either one of you through more pain.....if you dont trust him dont be with him ....simple.

Answer 9

I would definatly call her! But she will lie about it so after you ask her (if thats what you wanna do) tell her to stay the hell away from your husband in no uncertain terms. You dont even gottta be nice about it.

Answer 10

depends...are you the jealous and insecure type? i am! and i would have to call...who knows?? maybe he wasn't completely lying! LOL! sometimes men take number just to prove to themselves and their friends that they can still get them...i wouldn't be too upset unless she knew intimate details about my man...maybe he needed an ego boost! either let it go for real or follow it through to the end of your marriage...