I've gone out w/a few but it's like I forgot how!!! I was w/the same guy since I was 19. I'm almost 25 now and we just broke up after easter. I try to be myself around guys who I go out w/now but it just doesn't feel right. Do you guys think I'm just not ready yet? My ex was abusive so it's not that I'm still pining for him. What do you think it is? Why am I not comfortable?
2006-09-18 00:43:39 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
no I don't still have feelings for my ex. That relationship was over long before I finally left him. He beat the crap out of me. I don't want to be w/him at all or I would have stayed.
2006-09-18 00:47:49 · update #1
You just need more time. You put alot of years and effort into your past relationship. Time will heal all and even if he was abusive you still miss him deep down. I know from experience. Just go out and have fun. Don't worry. You're still so young. You'll find another just why now? Go party and have fun with your girlfriends flirting with other guys.
2006-09-18 00:47:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are probably feeling this way because you have been with your ex for so long. 6 years is quite a while, and he was the only guy you were used to. You also could be feeling this way because it's hard trusting and opening your heart completely to other men right now because of the past abuse you have dealt with. It's hard for you to be yourself especially when you feel you can't really be this way with certian people. I think that maybe you should think about giving yourself time to get over the breakup. You may be moving and pushing for a new relationship too fast. Being in a new relationship will not ease the pain of the last one. Your heart will heal through time trust me. Get to know yourself a little better. Once you deal with you first then everything else will fall into place. I'm not saying that you need to turn down every guy that wants to be with you, but if he does come along make sure there is an instant connection between the two of you. You hav been abused and unhappy for so long. Make sure this time you know what you want and don't settle for anything less than you deserve. I wish you the best of luck!!!
2006-09-18 00:53:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're uncomfortable because you were with him for so long and it's weird to be out with someone else. It doesn't mean you're pining for him, it just means you haven't really adjusted to being without him. It will take time to get over that feeling. Are you ready to date? Only you can answer that. If you have no feelings for the ex anymore, then continue the dating. You will eventually be comfortable with it or you'll find someone who makes you comfortable.
2006-09-18 01:28:48 · answer #3 · answered by T.G. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need to take some quality time to help your self heal from your last relationship. This may be the reason that you are feeling uncomfortable in dating others so soon. Plus, you don't want to attract the same kind of person that your ex was, abusive, so you need to be careful of that. Make sure that you are not sending out the same kind of signals to others that attrached your ex to you to begin with. Work on improving you and making you happier, without dating someone else, and I think that you will attract the right kind of person to yourself that you want to meet.
2006-09-18 00:51:47 · answer #4 · answered by Kinnley 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you have got used to getting treated roughly which had become a habit for you. Now if some guys talk to you nicely, you think they pretend. You need a person who can love you, care you, kiss you, make you comfortable but at the same time spank you are use abusive language. You will then feel comfortable. I think I can just do that with all love.
2006-09-18 00:49:16 · answer #5 · answered by Spider 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your really not over it, although you are taking the steps to try to be. It's Ok. Just keep dating, and you will come across the one that captures what it is going to take to break that shell you put around yourself. It took me about 4 years to get over a guy one time. It's Ok.
2006-09-18 00:48:07 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi there!!
The only possible reason for this, based on how I understood the story is maybe you haven't coped up with the previous relationship that you had.. Don't be too negative.. Don't think of the things happened on the previous relationship that you had.. Cheer up and live life to the fullest..
Take care..
Goodluck..
2006-09-18 00:47:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
U need time to heal and mend after U break up it takes time more for some than others. Sounds like u have a good Heart.
2006-09-18 00:46:21 · answer #8 · answered by sarge 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After being beat up by the one that is supposed to be your support, hurts you body and soul. It will take you awhile to trust again and counseling might speed the process up. Don't self medicate with street drugs thinking they will help. They don't help, they just suppress the healing process.
2006-09-18 00:54:04 · answer #9 · answered by Yabut 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need time to get over the relationship and mourn for the loss of it. Once you put it behind you, you'll be raring to go out and have a blast.
2006-09-18 00:48:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋