2006-09-17 23:29:15 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
havin an affair
2006-09-17 23:36:41 · answer #1 · answered by Carefree? Noway! I wish! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for almost 16 years and I've seen MANY friends and family divorce. I see 3 main causes.
1] Married for the wrong reason. The right reason to marry is you love the other person so much that you can't be happy without him/her. Marriage is difficult and some days all that keeps you from killing that other person is that you love them.
Wrong reasons include: wanting to have kids NOW, making it easier to buy a house, getting health insurance, giving up on finding love and settling on someone you just like. I have seen divorces from all these things.
2] Marrying someone with a personality trait you absolutely hate but believing you can change that person. It is very hard to change basic things about a person. If your potential spouse is moody then he/she will probably always be moody. Or selfish, or whatever it is you don't like. If it's a deal-breaking problem insist on seeing it change BEFORE you marry rather than trying to fix it afterward.
3] Inflexibility. Marriage takes a lot of compromise. On every decision from what's for dinner tonight, to how much money to spend on a house, or where to retire, two people will have to come up with a solution both can live with. That means you can't always get what you want - and in today's society most people just don't get that. They think if they don't get everything they want then they are with the wrong person. Unless you marry a complete doormat you are going to have to learn to live without everything you want.
So in summary, marry for love - love of the person as is, not an idealized version - and then express that love by taking the loved one's needs into account when making decisions.
2006-09-17 23:55:53 · answer #2 · answered by Queen of Cards 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the main cause of divorce is lack of Trust.
Communication plays a major part in the relationship of a couple and if communication and honesty is lacking, suspicion evolves and mistrust sets in.
If there is mistrust between people for any reason, it is extremely difficult to gain trust back and the division of the couple begin, with the probability of them ending in divorce.
2006-09-18 00:11:41 · answer #3 · answered by Ally 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lack of money and poor communication beteween spouses are the main cause of divorce
2006-09-17 23:37:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Poor spelling.
Being married is the main cause of divorce. So don't get married.
:o)
Jerry
2006-09-18 00:42:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Misunderstanding between the both, either before marriage or after marriage.
2006-09-18 00:57:29 · answer #6 · answered by sona_d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The lack of communication, either by both parties or just one person.
2006-09-17 23:37:16 · answer #7 · answered by Mike S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage...I have never heard of non-married couples divorcing.
2006-09-17 23:37:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
loads of causes!!! bt the main one is lack of love n trust.
2006-09-18 10:53:41 · answer #9 · answered by sylesh3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Incompatibility. ~Scottie
2006-09-17 23:37:28 · answer #10 · answered by Scott T 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋