I have been with my boyfriend for seven years, and when i was younger i was the one that thought that he was cheating. Now, after seven years he thinks i cheat on him and we always fight about it. I don't give him any reason to feel that way but he still accuses me. It keeps getting worse, what can i do to make him trust me?
2006-09-17 17:18:43 · 13 answers · asked by Lenka 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Always let him know where you are. Always tell him everything.
2006-09-17 17:24:10 · answer #1 · answered by AugustMan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you have not had sex with anyone since at least last week, then laugh and say don't be silly, it is you and you alone, why else would I have stuck with you for 7 years even though you have cheated on me, I was told that the reason your bringing this up is because you may be cheating again, using reverse physiology on me are you, give him something to think about!
2006-09-18 00:27:14 · answer #2 · answered by Michael 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is anything you can do to convince him that you will not cheat, if he wants to believe that you will cheat on him. It's him, not you. If he continues to think this way, how many ways can you think of to convince him?
He's either very insecure about his relationship with you or he's drawing attention away from him by accusing you! Either ways you have to decide whether you want to live with such a condition in your relationship with him.
2006-09-18 00:50:01 · answer #3 · answered by G.T. L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had that feeling at a later stage with my ex gf, who left me now. A guy usually feels his love is cheating for one of 2 reasons, 1 is obviously if she really is cheating. But usually i think it is because he gets more and more scared of loosing her, and maybe questioning himself whether he is even good enough for you? I know i questioned that. At that point, even if my gf mentions another guy (be it a celeb or a someone at work) i assumed she liked him better etc etc. I dont know why that happened, it just did as i started to care more for her then i thought possible. But i wasnt getting the assurance, maybe i was the one who should have assured myself? Cos it can get very difficult for the girl to try to assure on something she didnt do.
I think he feels he will loose you. This is simply a sign of love. But most girls take it as a sign or mistrust (obviously you can see why) but seriously, rather than fighting, just hug the guy even if he dsnt let you. I know i regret continuosly saying that to my gf, cos she got sick of it and left. But if you really arent cheating, seriously dont give it up, dont let the fights make you think its a bad relationship. Sometimes fights show progression in a relationship. maybe you have to compliment him a little more? i dont mean fake compliments, the compliments of why you even went out with him in the first place.
7 years is a long time. You dont wanna lose this relationship, cos if everything else seems fine, this thing (fighting about cheating) can break relationships. But dont let it happen, its a guy thing to think that way, it doesnt mean the guy doesnt trust the girl enough, just means hes scared of loosing her. Depends on how sensitive the guy is tho. but usually guys do this because we dont know how else to show our feelings.
hope everything works out, best of luck, and dont give up , cos relationships at a later stage (your stage) get these kind of fights and make people think its ending, but infact you both are bonding even closer then ever and this insecure feelings sometimes arise.
Hmmm reminds me of the good old days......
take care,
Sel
2006-09-18 00:33:36 · answer #4 · answered by DudeWantsAnswers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of him. This relationship is over. If he doesn't trust you now after all this time, he never will. I always find that the one doing the accusing is the one doing the dirt.
2006-09-18 00:22:22 · answer #5 · answered by sinned 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
show him and TELL him that you only have eyes for him. Trust is the most important thing in a relationship, its the foundation, and if that is weak, than everything else will be too. 7 years is a long time and its worth fighting for! Trust me, he WANTS to trust you.
2006-09-18 00:21:37 · answer #6 · answered by Dead Birds Don't Poop 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep your eyes open, because the other person who said this is right, if he's acusing you that must mean he's guilty and wants to take the focus off of him.
As for convincing him, do something romantic and sentimental to show him your appreciation. It could be something as simple as getting him something he wanted on ebay, or maybe taking him to a nice dinner...or somethin a bit more personal leave him little notes around the house tellin him why you love him...and sneak in the phrase "because your the only man for me" it'll do wonders for his ego.
good luck!
2006-09-18 00:28:36 · answer #7 · answered by myfianceisamonkey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will take time. As long as you know in your heart, that's all that matters. Just be safe. In what ways it it getting worse? You guys have trust issues. Maybe you should take a break.
2006-09-18 00:25:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's impossible to dictate what others think or feel. All you can do is be honest and leave it up to him whether or not to trust you. If you aren't happy, and things don't seem like they'll change, it might be time to move on.
2006-09-18 00:25:00 · answer #9 · answered by El Guapo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is interesting. i was watching dane cook (the comedian) on a show just yesterday, and he was talking about something like this. he said that the first time he ever cheated, he kept on getting mad because he kept thinking that she was cheating on him too even though he was the only one. he said that he just kept getting madder and madder and he would just yell at her because he couldn't feel like he could trust her even though he did the cheating. i know this sounds dumb, but you never know, i would really trust dane cook on this one.
2006-09-18 00:25:46 · answer #10 · answered by GhostBear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you go out, don't put on any makeup. Wear plain, unflattering clothes. Don't socialize with guys. If you don't attract any attention from men, your boyfriend will not suspect you of cheating.
2006-09-18 00:26:56 · answer #11 · answered by Wait a Minute 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋