What celebs you think are gay in Hollywood and hiding it?

Question

Why don't they just come out...

Answer 1

A lot swing "both ways" because it is accepted. It is so many...too many to list here. Wait...I have a website link:

From www.geocities.com/mnussitch/gossip.html



A List

Version 4.4 (13 October 02)

Next update around the start of the new year.

The following may or may not be true, and is based on hearsay, rumor, and gossip--most of it from relatively reliable sources, some from more dubious ones, and some based on my own suppositions. I have tried to make this list as accurate as possible, but in some/many cases I wasn't able to verify rumors. I have not put anything here that I know to be untrue. If you want, send me e-mail .

Proceed at your own risk. Believe what you want & reject the rest.

FOD means "Friend of Dorothy," a.k.a. a gay man.
L______ stands for lesbian.
B______ stands for bisexual.

Recent updates, additions and corrections since Version 4.3 are in blue.

With thanks to the folks on alt.gossip.celebrities , K-Y Mellie, and Jill "The Diva" Stempel, from whose page I took some of the information included below. Thanks to Richard Corliss (in Time) and Richard Johnson (in the Post) for mentioning the site in their columns. Thanks to John Lithgow for mentioning the site on Conan O'Brian's show; to reward him I made up something about him for his entry. Thanks to Maxim magazine for rewarding my efforts with a Site of the Week award. Thanks to the Star for the interview.



Ackroyd, Dan. Very charming in person, or so I'm told.

Adams, Bryan. Prefers the company of gentlemen. Linked with Todd Oldham.

Adams, Maude. Bisexual. Linked to Bruce Dern & OJ Simpson. Reportedly took Dern to court for claiming to have penetrated her while filming a simulated sex scene during the movie Tattoo.

Adjani, Isabelle. Formerly with Daniel Day Lewis & Warren Beatty.

Affleck, Ben. Rude and a boor. "Boring." May possibly be more than just friends with Matt Damon. Has a filthy mouth. Tranny chaser. Recovering alcoholic. Linked with Pamela Anderson, Sandra Bullock, Salma Hayek, Lauren Holly, Famke Jannsen, Nicole Kidman, Jennifer Lopez, and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Agassi, Andre. Humorless, vain airhead. Possibly closeted. Linked with Steffi Graf, Brooke Shields (his ex-wife), and Babs Streisand.

Aguilera, Christina. "Rude, crude, selfish and disrespectful." Stuck-up snot. Possibly prefers women and three-ways. Cocaine addict. Has breast implants. Bad tipper. Linked with Carson Daly (Christina, is this the best you can do?), Dave Grohl, Enrique Igelsias, and Justin Timberlake.

Aikman, Troy. FOD. Or perhaps not. Reports differ.

Albert, Prince, of Monaco. FOD? Linked with Angie Everhart, Kylie Minogue, Brooke Shields, Claudia Schiffer, and Sharon Stone.

Al Fayed, Dodi. Linked to Princess Diana, Darryl Hannah, Princess Stephanie of Monaco, Winona Ryder, and Brooke Shields. Died in the same car crash that snuffed Di.

Alger, Horatio. Pederast. (This is an established historical fact, not mere gossip.)

Ali, Muhammed. Cheated on his wife. "An uncaring, self-centered dad."

Allen, Joan. Former coke dealer and user before hitting Hollywood and making it big. Has been clean for a number of years now and is well-respected and generally seen as being a very nice woman.

Allen, Tim. Possessed of “self-destructive” and “womanizing ways.” Former coke dealer.

Allen, Woody. Neurotic pedophile who took up with his wife's adopted daughter and betrayed the esteem millions held him in; still literally cannot understand what the problem is. Linked with Diane Keaton & Mia Farrow; had affair with teenager during filming of Manhattan.

Alley, Kirstie. Divorced from Parker Stevenson. $cientologist. Given to boasting publicly about her partners' sexual skill. Recovering drug addict. Has a torture chamber in her house. Linked with James Wilder.

Allman, Gregg. Recovering drug addict. Linked with Cher. Reportedly introduced porn star Savannah to the biz when she was only 16.

Almodovar, Pedro. Gay.

Ames, Willie. Recovering drug abuser. Currently a tedious born- again Christian.

Amos, Tori. Rape victim. Record industry brat whose first attempt at a prog-rock album was so laughably bad it was suppressed. Employed casting couch to get the chance to make the follow-up album. Needs to get over herself.

Anderson, Gillian. Divorced. Single mom; daughter reportedly fathered by David Duchovny. May have a drinking/drug problem. Rumored to be bisexual. Hot-tempered. Linked with David Duchovny, Melissa Etheridge, Jodie Foster, Gina Gershon, and Helen Hunt.

Anderson, Laurie. Linked to Lou Reed.

Anderson, Loni. Failed marriage to and bitter divorce with Burt Reynolds; held her adopted son hostage in the divorce. Bi_____; linked with Carol Burnett.

Anderson, Louie. Bi______

Anderson, Pamela. Ex-wife of Tommy Lee and broke up with him again after taking him back; maybe she is learning, after all. Has breast implants. Videotaped sex with her husband; tape was then stolen from them and widely sold. Continues to be surprised that no one takes her seriously; lied, stupidly, about Tommy Lee giving her Hepatitis C when the truth, that it was Kid Rock who gave it to her, was so easily discovered. Formerly with Ben Affleck, Scott Baio, Dean Cain, John Cusack, Kid Rock, Marcus Schenkenberg & Sylvester Stallone.

Anderson, Richard Dean. Closeted FOD or bisexual. Linked with Justine Bateman, Lara Flynn Boyle, Marlee Matlin, Sela Ward, and Katarina Witt.

Andress, Ursula. Formerly married to John Derek, which means she's suffered enough. Linked with Mikhail Baryshnikov, Jean-Paul Belmondo, Marlon Brando, Sean Connery, James Dean, John DeLorean, Harry Hamlin, Dennis Hopper, Marcello Mastroianni, Ryan O'Neal, Elvis Presley,and Peter O'Toole.

Andrews, Julie. Reportedly closeted L____, in long-term relationship with Carol Burnett. Married to Blake Edwards.

Aniston, Jennifer. Has become a big pothead through of her relationship with Brad Pitt. Has jealousy issues. Linked with Adam Duritz, Tate Donovan, Paul Rudd, and Brad Pitt.

Ann-Margret. Linked with Johnny Carson, Eddie Fisher, Steve McQueen, and Elvis Presley.

Apple, Fiona. Humorless, self-important brat. Holding on to reality with only a couple of fingers.

Arbuckle, Fatty. Slut. Unfairly convicted in the public of killing a younger actress via Coke bottle rape; poor Fatty was innocent, but the world was convinced otherwise.

Archer, Anne. $cientologist.

Arden, Eve. L______ or Bi______.

Armstrong, Louie. Major pothead.

Arnaz, Desi. Philandering SOB, but Lucille Ball loved him, so I shouldn't say any more. Alcoholic. Married to Lucille Ball; linked with Ginger Rogers, Cesar Romero, and Lana Turner.

Arnold, Tom. Failed marriage to Roseanne Barr; bitter divorce from her. Large drug user & dealer. Has hair implants. Treats his assistants badly. Former tabloid snitch.

Arquette, Patricia. Linked with Nicholas Cage, Tom Cruise, and Christian Slater.

Arthur, Jean. Bisexual.

Astaire, Fred. Rumored for years to enjoy the company of younger men. Difficult to work with. Linked with Ginger Rogers.

Aykroyd, Dan. Nice guy, but has a taste for loose women in bars. (But then, who among us does not?)

Azaria, Hank. Linked with (failed marriage to) and merkin for Helen Hunt. Linked with Matthew Perry. (No, really!)

Bacall, Lauren. Bailed on supporting victims of McCarthy because "they were Communists." Very stingy. Married to Humphrey Bogart; linked with Kirk Douglas, James Garner, Harry Guardino, Burgess Meredith, Frank Sinatra, and Emmanuel Ungaro.

Baez, Joan. Bisexual, although she now denies any former same-sex relationships. Formerly with Bob Dylan.

Baio, Scott. Closeted bisexual. Former unrestrained relationship with Erin Moran; also linked with Pamela Anderson, Nicole Eggert, and Heather Locklear. Jodie Foster claims to have made out heavily with him, as well.

Baldwin, Alec. The bloviator. Arrogant SOB. Punches out photographers. Acts like spoiled infant on-set. Left Janine Turner almost literally at the altar. Drug problem. Linked with Kim Basinger (failed marriage; among other things, he hit her), Kristin Davis, Jennifer Love Hewitt, and Tatum O'Neal.

Baldwin, Daniel. Cokehead. Slut.

Baldwin, Stephen. So enamored of himself he probably masturbates while holding up his own facial shot.

Ball, Lucille. Long-suffering wife of Desi Arnaz; smart, smart woman and a great comedienne. Alcoholic, and not a good mother to her children. Linked with Milton Berle, Henry Fonda, Peter Lawford, Robert Mitchum, George Raft, George Sanders, and Orson Welles.

Banderas, Antonio. Left his wife for Melanie Griffith. Not the brightest bulb in the lamp. Linked with Angelina Jolie.

Bankhead, Tallulah. Omnisexual, and enjoyed it. Hilarious raconteur & source of many great stories. Drug user. All About Eve was reportedly about her. Linked with John Barrymore, Sr., Robert Benchley, Leonard Bernstein, Marlon Brando, Yul Brynner, Winston Churchill (!), Gary Cooper, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr, Greta Garbo, Billie Holliday, Libby Holman, Beatrice Lillie, Chico Marx, Hattie McDaniel, Burgess Meredith, Edward R. Murrow, and Johnny Weissmuller.

Banks, Tyra. Breast implants. Difficult to work with. Linked with Michael Johnson, Seal, John Singleton, Chris Webber, and Tiger Woods.

Baraka, Amiri. Anti-Semitie.

Bardot, Brigitte. Animal rights activist. Linked with Warren Beatty, Jean-Paul Belmondo, Marlon Brando, Sean Connery, Alain Delon, Mick Jagger, Louis Malle, and Roger Vadim.

Barker, Clive. Out and open about it.

Barkin, Ellen. Formerly married to Gabriel Byrne. Linked with Ron Perelman.

Barrymore, Drew. Enjoys playing both sides of the field; openly admits to being B______. Flashed Dave Letterman on camera. Had messy breakup with her domineering mother. Didn't make it through high school. Hygienically challenged. Recovering drug & alcohol addict. Linked with Jeremy Davies, Heather Graham, Tom Green (Drew, what are you thinking?),Val Kilmer, Courtney Love, Jack Nicholson (when she was 13 or 14), Chris O'Donnell, Sam Rockwell, and Luke Wilson.

Bartel, Paul. Out and doesn't care who knows it.

Baryshnikov, Mikhail. Linked with Leslie Brown, Jessica Lange, Liza Minnelli, Isabella Rossellini, and Janine Turner.

Basinger, Kim. "Has more neuroses than an inbred poodle." Acts like a spoiled infant on- and off-set. Jerk. Recovering cocaine and alcohol addict. Linked with Alec Baldwin (failed marriage), Jeff Bridges, Sean Connery, Eminem, Richard Gere, Michael Keaton, Prince, Robert Redford, Burt Reynolds, and Mickey Rourke.

Bass, Lance. Self-described "power bottom."

Bassett, Angela. Isn't as nice as she seems.

Bateman, Justine. Linked with Richard Dean Anderson.

Bates, Kathy. L______.

Bearse, Amanda. L______.

Beatty, Warren. Slut supreme; the only person he hasn't slept with is me (and, okay, Shirley Maclaine). Currently married to Annette Benning (though rumors are that he's not faithful to her, either). Also reportedly humorless, homophobic, and unpleasant--and, BION, not good in bed, according to H-wood prostitutes and Madonna (although Joan Collins says otherwise about this). Difficult to work with. Linked with (deepbreath) Isabelle Adjani, Brigitte Bardot, Candice Bergen, Sonia Braga, Judy Carne, Cher, Julie Christie, Joan Collins, Janice Dickinson, Britt Ekland, Jane Fonda, Melanie Griffith, Goldie Hawn, Bianca Jagger, Diane Keaton, Madonna, Vivian Leigh, Jackie Onassis, Michelle Phillips, Diana Ross, Diane Sawyer, Stephanie Seymour, Carly Simon, Barbara Streisand, Liv Ullman, Mamie Van Doren, and Natalie Wood (along with a cast of thousands).

Beck. $cientologist. Linked with Gina Gershon and Winona Ryder.

Beckinsdale, Kate. Has a penchant for setside squabbling.

Belafonte, Harry. FOD. Rumored to have married Farley Granger on Fire Island during the 1950s.

Belmondo, Jean-Paul. Linked with Ursula Andress & Brigitte Bardot.

Bening, Annette. Married to Warren Beatty.

Bergen, Candice. swoon! Closeted L______ Widow of the late Louis Malle, for whom she provided beard services. Linked with Warren Beatty, Jerry Brown, Robert F. Kennedy, Henry Kissinger (oh, Candice, how could you?), Jack Nicholson, Burt Reynolds, and Terence Stamp.

Bergin, Michael. FOD. Bathhouse habitue'.

Bergman, Ingrid. Linked with Yul Brynner, Gary Cooper, Bing Crosby, Burgess Meredith, Gregory Peck, Anthony Quinn, Omar Sharif, Spencer Tracy. Shocked Hollywood and America by going to Europe and having a child out of wedlock. Mother of Isabella Rosselini. One of the 10 Most Beautiful Women Ever.

Berkley, Elizabeth. Formerly with Paul Verhoeven.

Berle, Milton. Sour, unpleasant man. Notorious for stealing other comedians' jokes/gags. Legendary implement. Bad father. Swapped women (and possibly drag queens) with Bing Crosby. Once "dated" Marilyn Monroe; also linked with Lucille Ball, Theda Bara, Veronica Lake, Aimee Semple Macpherson, and Nancy Reagan.

Bernard, Crystal. "Hypocritical Christian who engages in lesbian affairs and then quickly retreats to religion and her boyfriend and pretends to be Miss Moral." Linked with Morgan Fairchild.

Bernhard, Sandra. L____/bisexual. Had affair with Madonna; also possibly linked with Debi Mazur and/or Jennifer Grey.

Bernsen, Corbin. Philanderer. Linked with Vanna White.

Bernstein, Leonard. Bisexual; had a preference for teenaged African-Americans. Linked with Tallulah Bankhead, Rudolf Nureyev, and Lana Turner.

Berry, Chuck. Voyeur and likes playing with poo as well as watching women urinate and defecate.

Berry, Halle. Formerly married to wife-beater David Justice, and formerly abused by one of her men. "Temperamental" (read: difficult to work with). Formerly a very pricey kept woman. Linked to Prince Albert of Monaco, Kevin Costner, Spike Lee, Eddie Murphy, and Wesley Snipes (reportedly the one who beat her and rendered her near-deaf in one ear).

Bertinelli, Valerie. Difficult to work with. Linked with Eddie Van Halen (as well as most men within her general vicinity).

Beyonce. Linked with Eminem and Jay-Z.

Bisset, Jacqueline. Has some brains behind her beauty. Linked with Alexander Godunov, Dean Martin, Marcello Mastroianni, Steve McQueen, Ryan O'Neal, Frank Sinatra, and Terence Stamp.

Black, Karen. $cientologist.

Blackwell, Mr. ***** Supreme (I mean that in a good way). FOD. Linked with Cary Grant, Tyrone Power, and Randolph Scott.

Bleeth, Yasmine. Hygienically challenged. Cocaine abuser; introduced to blow by Don Johnson, Yasmine has ruined her face and nose through its overuse. Linked with Richard Grieco, Don Johnson, and Matthew Perry.

Bloom, Orlando. A yummy monkey, indeed. ("Dirty flirt.") Linked with Susanna Eng.

Bloomberg, Mayor. Into being dominated. Admits to pot use.

Bonaduce, Danny. Drug user. Beat up a transvestite hooker. General impression he projects is of a jerk--at least, that's my take on him.

Bogarde, Dirk. FOD. Linked with Judy Garland.

Bogart, Humphrey. Cheated on his wife. Anti-semite and drunkard. Affairs with Lauren Bacall and Louise Brooks.

Bolton, Michael. Vain. Deserves a sound thrashing. Linked with Ashley Judd & Nicollette Sheridan.

Bonet, Lisa. Difficult to work with. Linked with Lenny Kravitz (formerly married to him).

Bow, Clara. Enjoyed men--many and often. Infamous in Hollywood for her enthusiasm and endurance; was "special friend" to the entire 1929 (1927?) USC football team. Linked with Eddie Cantor, Gary Cooper, John Gilbert, Bela Lugosi and John Wayne.

Bowie, David. Huge drug abuser. Married to Iman. Openly bisexual & supposedly linked at one time with Mick Jagger; also linked with Bianca Jagger and Marianne Faithfull.

Boyer, Charles. Committed suicide following the death of his wife. Linked with Katharine Hepburn and Hedley Lamarr.

Boyle, Lara Flynn. Good old girl. Possible coke habit, which might explain why she's so unhealthily gaunt. Linked with Richard Dean Anderson, Adam Duritz, Harrison Ford, Kyle Maclachlan, Jack Nicholson (EW!), David Spade, and Bruce Willis.

Bracco, Lorraine. Bi______. Linked with Harvey Keitel & Edward James Olmos via failed marriages.

Branagh, Kenneth. "Early in his career was ambitio-sexual--would sleep with anyone to advance his career." Cute but conceited. Possibly yet another Great Gay British Actor. Couldn't handle his then-wife's success and pouted, causing Emma Thompson to divorce him. Linked with Helena Bonham Carter and Alicia Silverstone.

Brando, Marlon. Alien/freak. Admitted bisexual. Not a good father to his children; reportedly molested his daughter who committed suicide. Glutton. A slut, in his time. Difficult to work with. Linked with Ursula Andress, Tallulah Bankhead, Brigitte Bardot, Joan Collins, Wally Cox, Faye Dunaway, Marilyn Monroe, Rita Moreno, Jackie O, and Shelley Winters.

Brandy. Diva-in-training.

Brett, George. Bi______.

Brewster, Jordana. Linked with Derek Jeter and Mark Wahlberg.

Bridges, Jeff. Former heavy drug user (and possibly not-so-recovering alcoholic). Linked to Kim Basinger, Valerie Perrine and Cybill Shepherd.

Bridges, Todd. Long string of drug busts.

Broderick, Matthew. Married to Sarah Jessica Parker (although the marriage may be in trouble). Formerly with Jennifer Grey, Helen Hunt, and Penelope Ann Miller. Killed a mother and daughter in a traffic accident in Ireland, and is reportedly still contrite over it. Is destined for Hell because of Ferris Bueller. Possible FOD.

Brolin, Josh. Linked with Minnie Driver and Diane Lane.

Brooks, Louise. Former call girl. Razor-sharp as well as beautiful. Linked with Humphrey Bogart, Charlie Chaplin, Greta Garbo, and William S. Paley.

Brooks, Mel. Possibly B_______. Linked with Anne Bancroft.

Brosnan, Pierce. Homophobe.

Brown, Bobby. All-around asshole. Married to and merkin for Whitney Houston. Linked with Madonna. Wife-beater and generally abusive towards women. Slut, alcoholic and drug addict. Most likely riddled with every sexually-transmitted disease so far discovered. Unpleasant personality. Some of the worst humanity has to offer.

Brown, Jerry. Fruitloop. Linked with Candice Bergen, Stevie Nicks, Linda Ronstadt, Liv Ullman, and Natalie Wood.

Brown, Jim. Physical abuser of women; has a problem with anger and violence.

Brown, Downtown Julie. Multiple plastic surgeries. Was a prostitute when she first came to NYC.

Brown, Julie. L______.

Browne, Jackson. Talentless, conceited hack and abuser of women. Beat Darryl Hannah while he was involved with her.

Bryant, Kobe. Only married his girlfriend when her parents threatened to have him arrested for statutory rape.

Brynner, Yul. Conceited. Linked with Tallulah Bankhead, Ingrid Bergman, Joan Crawford, Marlene Dietrich, Judy Garland, Gina Lollabrigida, Marilyn Monroe, and Nancy Davis Reagan.

Bujold, Genevieve. Difficult to work with. Linked with Elliot Gould.

Bullock, Jim J. Crystal meth user. FOD; HIV+.

Bullock, Sandra. Reportedly a very nice person, although she was very rude to a group of NYC firefighters. Linked with Ben Affleck, Hugh Grant, Matthew McConaughey, Chris O'Donnell, Jason Patric, and with Dweezil Zappa.

Buono, Victor. FOD.

Burghoff, Gary. Difficult to work with. Has a mangled hand.

Burke, Billie. (aka Glinda, the Good Witch) L______.

Burke, Delta. Difficult to work with.

Burnett, Carol. Reportedly a Closet L______. So adorable most men would marry her anyway. Reported long-term relationship with Julie Andrews. Also linked with Loni Anderson.

Burns, Ed. Linked with Heather Graham, Lauren Holly, Winona Ryder, and Christy Turlington.

Burr, Raymond. Closet case. Linked with Tuesday Weld.

Burton, Richard. Drunkard. Closet case. Abused women. Funneled money to IRA. Two marriages to Elizabeth Taylor. Tried but failed to seduce Eddie Fisher. Also linked with Zsa Zsa Gabor, Ava Gardner, Jean Simmons, Susan Strasburgh, Barbra Streisand, Lana Turner and Raquel Welch.

Busey, Gary. Drug user. Wife-beater. Has found Jesus and now supposedly lives a boring, party-free life, although rumors are that this is a sham. Assaulted Robin Quivers during an appearance on the Howard Stern show. Linked with Babs Streisand.

Bush, Barbara. Married to George Bush. Reportedly nice in her dotage but vicious to social outsiders as a college girl.

Bush, George. "Glad-handing sack of ****." Prissy and sanctimonious hypocrite. Had long-time affair while married to Barbara Bush; hired his mistress as State Dept spokeswoman. Also reported to have enjoyed the favors of "party girls."

Bush, George W. Recovering drunkard and cokehead. Not the brightest bulb in the lamp, and in fact couldn’t spell cat if you gave him the “c” and the “a.” The best argument against participatory democracy I know. Hypocritical moralist; Bill Clinton without the brains. Funded a girlfriend's abortion. At odds with his wife over how to treat his daughters' alcoholism.

Bush, Kate. "The most stoned woman in Britain." Alcoholic. Holds a number of, shall we say, "off-beat" religious & philosophical ideas. Linked with Peter Gabriel & David Gilmour.

Butler, Brett. Escaped from a horrible marriage to a wife-beater. Recovering alcoholic. Got breast implants, and has a penchant for exposing her new teats to anyone--particularly cute young (young) men. Unpleasant to her cast and crew.

Butler, Dan. Open about his preferences.

Byrne, Gabriel. Formerly with Ellen Barkin, Naomi Campbell, Madonna, and Julia Ormond.

Caan, James. Abuser of women. Alcoholic & cocaine user. Patron of Heidi Fleiss.

Cage, Nicholas. Long-time heroin user. Didn't make it through high school. Attacks paparazzi. Has at least dabbled in (and with, and on) men. Formerly with Patricia Arquette (ex-wife), Laura Dern, Sarah Jessica Parker, Lisa Marie, and Uma Thurman.

Cagney, James. Possibly had a few same-sex affairs. Linked with Merle Oberon.

Cain, Dean. Vain pretty boy. (Very pretty.) Reportedly easy to work with. Might be playing for the home team. Deflowered Brooke Shields. Formerly with Pamela Anderson, Teri Hatcher, Nastassja Kinski, Gabrielle Reece (who he treated badly--or possibly it was the other way around), and Samantha Torres.

Caine, Michael. Recovering alcoholic. Linked with Faye Dunaway & Bianca Jagger.

Cameron, James. Conceited putz. Cheated on Linda Hamilton with Suzy Amis.

Campbell, Naomi. Unpleasant woman. Drug addict; has been hospitalized for overdoses at least once. Poster child for Assholes Of America (Models Division). Dim bulb. Linked to Eric Clapton, Adam Clayton, Robert De Niro, Johnny Depp, Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Fiennes, Quincy Jones, Eddie Murphy, Sean Penn, Sly Stallone, and Mike Tyson.

Campbell, Neve. Has acquired a reputation for using her co-stars as stepping stones to better roles, and giving her body in exchange. Rumored to be Bi______. Linked with John Cusack and Matthew Perry.

Capote, Truman. Gay (duh). Drunk. Linked with Errol Flynn and Tyrone Power.

Carne, Judy. Bisexual. Linked with Warren Beatty, Steve McQueen, Burt Reynolds, Vidal Sassoon.

Carey, Drew. Victim of sexual abuse when a child. Picks the wrong women to fall for, poor guy. Enjoys being humiliated in bed.

Carey, Mariah. A certain problem with faithfulness and hygiene. Her early career was funded by her sister's prostitution. Very difficult to work with. Has breast implants. Linked to P. Diddy, Matt Dillon, Eminem, Grant Hill, Derek Jeter, and record company exec Tommy Mottola, who she used to get a record contract.

Carrey, Jim. Unpleasant man, simultaneously rampantly insecure and hideously conceited. Extreme hypochondriac. Didn't make it through high school. Has been known to act extremely childishly on-set, although there are some reports that one-on-one he's not bad. Has sexually harassed numerous actresses. Used LSD when he was a kid. Linked with Lauren Holly, Ashley Judd, Courtney Love, Linda Ronstadt, and Renee Zellweger.

Carson, Johnny. Jury is still out on whether he is a manipulative, cold, creepy jerk, or simply a clueless and stupid innocent who was overly-well-protected by his handlers. Wife-beater. Hires working girls to sit on his lap and call him "Daddie." Linked with Ann-Margaret, Angie Dickinson, Morgan Fairchild, Sally Field, and Mamie Van Doren.

Carson, Lisa Nicole. Suffers from bipolar disorder; drug user.

Carter, Helena Bonham. Home-wrecker (with the husbands' help, of course). Broke up Kenneth Branagh's marriage to Emma Thompson, broke up Tim Burton's marriage, and was also linked with Steve Martin.

Carter, Lynda. Alcoholic.

Cartwright, Nancy. $cientologist.

Caruso, David. Egotistical. Difficult to work with.

Cates, Phoebe. Linked with Kevin Kline.

Cather, Willa. L______.

Chamberlain, Richard. Not-so-closeted FOD.

Chan, Jackie. Very private about his personal life, but has finally has provided some good gossip. Reportedly a very nice, down-to-earth man, although his marriage fell apart because he was never home and he did cheat on his wife. Reportedly linked with Maggie Cheung, Anita Mui, and Elaine Ng, who he fathered a child on.

Chancellor, John. Boozebag. Possibly dabbled in Uranian relationships when younger.

Chandler, Jeff. Crossdresser.

Chaplin, Charlie. Had a taste for young women; was the inspiration for Humbert Humbert in Lolita. "Notoriously oversized." Linked with Louise Brooks, Marion Davies, Paulette Goddard, Hedy Lamarr, Pola Negri, and Lupe Velez.

Chapman, Graham. Gay. Alcohol & drug abuse.

Chapman, Tracy. L______. Linked with Alice Walker.

Chase, Chevy. Vain, humorless, unpleasant man. Recovering drunk.

Cher. Unpleasant personality. More plastic surgery (including breast implants) than anyone (except Michael Jackson) thought the human body could withstand. Difficult to work with. Penchant for younger men; linked with Gregg Allman, Warren Beatty, Sonny Bono, Tom Cruise, David Geffen, John Heard, Val Kilmer, Richie Sambora, Gene Simmons, and Eric Stoltz.

Cherry, Neneh. L_____/bisexual.

Chevalier, Maurice. Closet case. Linked with Merle Oberon.

Chow Yun Fat. The Coolest Man Alive.

Christensen, Helena. Linked with Jon Bon Jovi, Adam Clayton, Billy Corgan, Liam Gallagher, Michael Hutchence, Dave Stewart, and Michael Stipe.

Christian, Claudia. L______/bisexual.

Christie, Julie. L____/bisexual. Linked with Warren Beatty, Brian Eno, Omar Sharif, Donald Sutherland, and Terence Stamp.

Churchill, Winston. Admitted to one same-sex affair. Linked with Tallulah Bankhead.

Clapton, Eric. Hasn't had a happy life; recovering drug addict. Linked with Naomi Campbell, Sheryl Crow, Mick Jagger, Janis Joplin, and Michelle Pfeiffer.

Clark, Anthony. Racist, gay, bi-polar pothead (quite a combination, that).

Clark, Arthur C. Pedophile (hey, I don't believe it, either, but that's the rumor).

Cleese, John. Is hard to work with, but he admits it. Didn't get along with his mother, who didn't want any children and regretted Cleese's birth.

Clift, Montgomery. Called "Pink Princess Tiny Meat" due to his underendowment. Closet queen. Drunkard. Linked with James Dean and Elizabeth Taylor.

Clinton, Bill. Corrupt gladhanding weasel. (Likable in person.) Horn-dog; reportedly nailed Sharon Stone on election evening. Rumored to have slept with Markie Post and Babs Streisand (while Hillary was visiting her ailing father, no less!). Merkin for Hillary Clinton. Underendowed.

Clinton, Hillary. L______/bisexual; reported to have slept with one/both of the Fosters and George Stephanopoulous. Corrupt, manipulative power behind Bill Clinton.

Clooney, George. Reportedly a nice guy. Slut. Possibly swinging for both fences. Like lumberjacks, likes to try on women's clothes. Linked with Lucy Liu, Kelly Preston, Julia Roberts, Winona Ryder, Charlize Theron, and Renee Zellweger.

Close, Glenn. Linked with Woody Harrelson, William Hurt, Jeremy Irons, Kevin Kline, and Cam Neely.

Cohen, William S. Anti-Semite.

Colbert, Claudette. Bisexual. Linked with Gary Cooper and Marlene Dietrich.

Cole, Natalie. Recovering heroin and cocaine addict; former Harlem streetwalker. Plays both sides of the fence.

Cole, Paula. Diva.

Coleman, Gary. Admitted virgin at age 30. Selling dates with himself over the Internet. Freak.

Collette, Toni. Is criminally underused by Hollywood. Recovering bulemic. Linked with Jonathan Rhys-Myers and Michael Stipe.

Collins, Joan. Doxy who is not aging well. Alcoholic. Reportedly was a hooker when she first arrived in Hollywood. Linked with, oh, just about everyone, including Warren Beatty, Harry Belafonte, Marlon Brando, Sydney (son of Charlie) Chaplin, Robert Evans, Dennis Hopper, Anthony Newley, Ryan O'Neal, Terence Stamp, and Robert Wagner.

Condit, Gary. Not only a murderer but also into leather and being watched.

Connery, Sean. Arrogant and self-satisfied sexist. Abuser of women. Never graduated from high school. Wears a toupee. Notorious tightwad. Requires a penis pump to function with women. Linked with Ursula Andress, Brigitte Bardot, Kim Basinger, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Gena Rowlands, Lana Turner, Shelley Winters, Lana Wood, and Catherine Zeta-Jones, who impressed him with her oral skills.

Connick Jr, Harry. Punk, albeit a talented one. Hung, and ought to be. (Yes, I know things are "hung" and people are "hanged.") Married to Jill Goodacre.

Cooper, Gary. Unthinking conservative; worked with HUAC, damn his eyes. Bisexual. Linked with Tallulah Bankhead, Ingrid Bergman, Clara Bow, Claudette Colbert, Marlene Dietrich, Anita Ekberg, Paulette Goddard, Libby Holman, Grace Kelly, Carole Lombard, Sophia Loren, Patricia Neal, Merle Oberon, Barbra Stanwyck, Lupe Velez & Mae West.

Copperfield, David. Vain and preening jerk. Hair-fetishist. Linked with Claudia Schiffer, although reportedly she only goes out with him because he pays her a lot of money. Also rumored to have a huge collection of gay porn, and possibly be a FOD. Vile personal habits.

Coppola, Sofia. Married to Spike Jonze.

Corgan, Billy. "Unpleasant, egomaniacal jerk; numerous enemies in the Chicago club scene, since he's always been the above." Linked with Courtney Love (while Kurt Cobain was still alive).

Cornwell, Patricia. L______. Stalked/stalks Jodie Foster; seems to be quite unstable. While researching a book, got involved with an FBI agent; said agent's husband then tried to kill Cornwell. Has stolen at least one story idea & plot.

Costner, Kevin. Humorless slut who overestimates the level of his own talent. Prone to interfering with production, direction, etc of his films. Cuckolded John Travolta. Linked with Halle Berry, Kathy Lee Gifford, Elle Macpherson, Michelle Pfeiffer, Kelly Preston, and Mira Sorvino.

Coulter, Ann. Alcoholic and habitual liar; if she says 2+2=4, doublecheck her figures.

Cox, Courtney. Junkie. Linked with David Arquette, Adam Duritz, Michael Keaton, Conan O'Brien, Sean Penn, Richie Sambora (who she blames for starting her coke addiction), and Christian Slater.

Crane, Bob. Into S&M. Liked to pick up prostitutes and videotape his sex with them. Liked to hook up with actresses he was working with as well as bored housewives in places he was doing dinner theater. Bludgeoned to death by a shady businessman in a hotel room post-videotaping.

Crane, Hart. FOD.

Crawford, Cindy. Former wife/beard to Richard Gere. Closet L____. Hard to work with. Linked with/used as merkins Robert De Niro and Val Kilmer.

Crawford, Joan. "Slept with every male star at MGM except Lassie." "She was a mean, tipsy, powerful, rotten-egg lady." "'There is not enough money in Hollywood to lure me into making another picture with Joan Crawford. And I like money." Vain and unpleasant personality. Horrible to her children. Broke into Hollywood by starring in porn films. Abused by her parents. Alcoholic. Clean freak. Reportedly killed her husband. Linked with Dorothy Azner, Jean-Pierre Aumont, Yul Brynner, Jackie Cooper, Kirk Douglas, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr, Henry Fonda, Glenn Ford, Clark Gable, John Garfield, Jackie Gleason, Cary Grant, Rock Hudson, JFK, Tyrone Power, Martha Raye, Barbara Stanwyck, Franchot Tone, Spencer Tracy, John Wayne, Johnny and Weissmuller.

Crosby, Bing. Unpleasant, cold personality. Treated family horribly and was physically abusive towards his children. Alcoholic. Swapped women (and possibly drag queens) with Milton Berle. Linked with Joan Bennett, Ingrid Bergman, Joan Blondell, Frances Farmer, Grace Kelly, and Mary Martin.

Crow, Sheryl. Drug addict. Difficult to work with. Broke up Ellen-and-Anne by nailing Anne, having Anne fall in love with her, and then tossing Anne aside. Also linked with Eric Clapton, Bob Dylan (ewww!), Jakob Dylan, Kid Rock, and Owen Wilson.

Crowe, Russell. Reports are divided on whether is a straight-shooter or an egotistical roughneck. Drunkard. High school drop-out. Has had at least one three-way (with another man, no less); rumored to have been same-sex before he hit it big in Hollywood. Rumored to have sold drugs as a teen. Linked with Jennifer Connelly, Jodie Foster, Heather Graham, Nicole Kidman, Courtney Love, Meg Ryan, Winona Ryder, and Sharon Stone.

Cruise, Tom. Oh, definitely not a Friend Of Dorothy. Why would you ever think such a thing? No, certainly not. And he definitely doesn't force his gay lovers to sign lengthy non-disclosure contracts before he gets involved with them; that's just a vile, untrue rumor started to bring shame on this quite emphatically heterosexual movie star. Certainly not someone who has and enjoys sex with lots of men. $cientologist. Vain & arrogant. Never graduated from high school. Acted badly towards Nicole Kidman during their break-up, which was caused partially by his insistence on raising the kids $cientologist (she wanted them raised Catholic) and partially because of her pregnancy, which may have been his and may have been Ewan McGregor's. Broke up with Nicole via his representatives. (Cruise, you swine.) Linked with Patricia Arquette, Cher, Penelope Cruz, Rebecca DeMornay, Nelly Furtado, Nicole Kidman, Heather Locklear, Paul Newman, Lisa Marie Presley, and Mimi Rogers.

Cukor, George. FOD.

Culkin, Macaulay. Perhaps the quintessential Too Famous Too Soon child star. Messed up on drugs--somewhat understandable, given his father (as thorough an ogre as you're likely to run across outside of the Crosby household). Possibly molested by Michael Jackson. Very friendly in person, however. Linked with Mila Kunis (of That '70s Show).

Curry, Tim. FOD or Bi______. Linked with Annie Potts.

Curtis, Jamie Lee. Pothead. Recovering drug and alcohol addict. Married to Christopher Guest. Linked with Adam Ant.

Curtis, Tony. Linked with, oh, just about everybody (including Janet Leigh, Marilyn Monroe and Mamie Van Doren). Abused by his mother. Recovering drug & alcohol addict.

Cusack, John. Linked with Pamela Anderson, Neve Campbell, Minnie Driver and Uma Thurman.

Dafoe, Willem. One of the Ten Biggest Men in Hollywood. Linked with Madonna and Mira Sorvino.

Dalle, Beatrice. Thief, drug user (cocaine and heroin) and generally wild and uncontrollable woman. Linked with Rupert Everett.

Damon, Matt. Cracking under pressure of fame, the little punk. Best friends with Ben Affleck, and possibly more. Linked with Penelope Cruz, Claire Danes (when she was under the legal age), Minnie Driver (who found out that he'd dumped her when she heard it on Oprah--Damon, you jerk), Susanna Eng, Calista Flockhart, Lucy Liu, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Winona Ryder.

Daly, Carson. Even less intelligent than he looks, which is saying something. Linked with Christina Aguilera, Jennifer Love Hewitt, and Tara Reid (what, does Daly wield The Force against women or something?).

Dando, Evan. Linked with Bijou Phillips, Julianna Hatfield, Kylie Minogue (who he was caught having sex with in a public toilet), and Liv Tyler, among others--and, yes, he and Julianna were having sex.

Danes, Claire. Insecurity leads her to take abuse from men--or perhaps it's her need to cover up her attraction to women. She needs someone like me to talk to. Linked with Matt Damon and "Indie moron" Ben Lee.

Dangerfield, Rodney. Problem with substance abuse.

Danson, Ted. Reportedly vain. Formerly involved with Whoopi Goldberg. Currently married to Mary Steenburgen.

Danza, Tony. Self-important (though at least one bartender says otherwise). Fingered as a client of a gay escort; prefers well-hung gentlemen, esp. porn stars.

Davies, Marion. Linked with Charlie Chaplin, Clark Gable, Leslie Howard, Joseph P. Kennedy, Dick Powell, William Randolph Hearst and Rudolph Valentino. (Her clitoris was nicknamed "rosebud" by Hearst, which is meaningful to you if you've seen Citizen Kane.)

Davies, Ray. Bisexual. Linked with Chrissie Hynde.

Davis, Ann B. Religious fanatic and alcoholic. L______.

Davis, Bette. A great star, and a great ***** (and not in a good way). Linked with Henry Fonda, Howard Hughes, Franchot Tone, and Gig Young.

Davis, Geena. Very difficult to work with, and has let her success go to her head. Breast implants. Linked with Jeff Goldblum, Renny Harlin (busted marriage) and Brad Pitt.

Davis, Kristin. "Snotty and spoiled." Recovering alcoholic. Linked with Alec Baldwin and Jeff Goldblum.

Davis, Miles. "The single most overrated figure in jazz." Brilliant despite the hype, but his genius does not outweigh the pure evil he did to so many other people. Emotionally and physically violent towards women, including Cicely Tyson during their marriage.

Davis, Jr, Sammy. Bisexual. Member of the Church of Satan. Linked with Linda Lovelace, Marilyn Monroe, Kim Novak and Jean Seberg.

Day, Doris. Hard to work with. Had an unhappy life. Linked with Jimmy Hoffa, Frank Sinatra, Tyrone Power, Ronald Reagan, and Debbie Reynolds.

De Acosta, Mercedes. Gave rise to the game of linking people via their sexual conquests. Famed Hollywood L______. Linked to Maude Adams, Alice B. Toklas, Marlene Dietrich, Isadora Duncan, and Greta Garbo.

Dean, James. Open bisexual; habitue of rough trade and leather bars. Linked with Nick Adams, Ursula Andress, Pier Angeli, Montgomery Clift, Rock Hudson, Eartha Kitt, Roddy McDowell, Sal Mineo, Liz Sheridan (Seinfeld's mom on Seinfeld) and Natalie Wood. Difficult to work with. Called 'the Human Ashtray' because he would ask men in leather bars to put out their cigarettes on his bare chest. Reportedly enjoyed amputees.

Degeneres, Ellen. Openly gay. Linked with Anne Heche, KD Lang and Martha Stewart. Some have said she is difficult to work with.

De Havilland, Olivia. Bisexual. Linked with Errol Flynn, Clark Gable, Edward Heath, Howard Hughes, John Huston, Frederic March, Burgess Meredith and Jimmy Stewart.

De La Hoya, Oscar. Rapist. Anti-semite.

Delaney, Kim. L______. Habitue' of L.A. girl bars. Once smuggled ganja for friends. DUI arrest.

Delon, Alain. Closet queen. Linked with Brigitte Bardot, Jane Fonda, and Shirley Maclaine.

Del Toro, Benicio. Regular guy. Macho. "Shockingly sweet...amazingly mellow." Has no particular liking for oral sex. Linked with Susanna Eng and Heather Graham.

Deluise, Dom. FOD.

DeMille, Cecil B. Anti-Semite.

DeMornay, Rebecca. Daughter of rightwing crackpot Wally George. Formerly with Tom Cruise.

Deneuve, Catherine. Into young boys in leather. Linked with Dean Martin, Marcelle Mastroianni, Roman Polanski, Burt Reynolds, Omar Sharif and Roger Vadim.

De Niro, Robert. Ho-hopper; linked to prostitutes both domestically and internationally. Prefers African-American women. Linked with Naomi Campbell, Cindy Crawford, Calista Flockhart, Whitney Houston, Janet Jackson, Ashley Judd, Uma Thurman and Shelley Winters.

Denver, Bob. Pothead.

Denver, John. His head was never recovered following his fatal plane crash.

Depardieu, Gerald. Asshole. Rapist as a teen. Grammar school dropout. Hygienically challenged. Linked with Nastassja Kinski.

Depp, Johnny. Difficult to work with. Drug user/abuser. Experimenting sexually. Linked with Naomi Campbell, Sherilyn Fenn, Jennifer Grey, Juliette Lewis, Kate Moss (with whom he shared addictions), Vanessa Paradis, Christina Ricci, and Winona Ryder.

Derek, Bo. "Very nice woman. As down to earth as can possibly be expected."

Derek, John. Creep. Jerk. Linked with (married to) Ursula Andress, Bo Derek, and Linda Evans.

Dern, Laura. Helped break up the marriages of Billy Bob Thornton and Ben Harper. Linked with Nicholas Cage, Jeff Goldblum, Renny Harlin, Kyle MacLachlan, Vincent Spano, and Treat Williams (while still a teen).

de Rossi, Portia. L______.

Des Barres, Pamela. World's Most Famous Groupie. Linked with Micheal Des Barres, Bob Dylan, Mick Jagger, Waylon Jennings, Don Johnson, Keith Moon, Jim Morrison, Jimmy Page, Robert Plant, and Frank Zappa.

Dey, Susan. Recovering alcoholic. Linked with David Cassidy and Wes Craven (while he was married).

Diana, Princess. Vain, shallow, petty woman. The less you knew her, the better you liked her. Addicted to Rohypnol.

Diaz, Cameron. "Self-important bimbo." Germ-phobic. Alcoholic and heroin user. Very hard to work for; once made her assistant shave her armpits for her. Linked with Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Dillon, Jared Leto, and Ed Norton.

Dicaprio, Leonardo. Slut. Reportedly aggressively bisexual. Treated Claire Danes horrendously on the set of Romeo. Reported heavy drug & alcohol use, to the point where it interferes with his acting performance. Hygienically challenged. Punk. Allegedly made gay porn under another name. Linked with Naomi Campbell, Cameron Diaz, Natasha Henstridge, Eva Herzigova, Lauren Holly,Juliette Lewis, Demi Moore, Kate Moss, Bijou Philips, Baby Spice, and Kate Winslett.

Dick, Andy. DUI and drug abuser. Bisexual.

Dickinson, Angie. Linked with Burt Bacharach, Johnny Carson, David Janssen, JFK, Larry King, and Frank Sinatra.

Dickinson, Janice. Linked with Warren Beatty, Mick Jagger, Grace Jones & Dolph Lundgren (in a three-way), Kelly LeBrock, Liam Neeson, Jack Nicholson, Prince Albert, and Sylvester Stallone.

Diddy, P. (aka the Egotist Formerly Known As Sean Coombs and Puff Daddy.) Hard to work for. Lousy in the sack. Possibly Bi______. Linked with Naomi Campbell, Mariah Carey, Lisa Lopes, Jennifer Lopez, Mase, and Leah Remini.

Diesel, Vin. Prefers the company of gentlemen (what a loss!). Ashamed of his ethnic background. Reportedly a nice guy in person. Linked with Nicole Kidman and Michelle Rodriguez, who said Vin was lousy in the sac (oh, like any of us are going to believe that).

Dietrich, Marlene. Good old girl; player with both sexes. Had a final, ugly descent into alcoholism. Linked with Brian Aherne, Burt Bacharach, Cecil Beaton, George Bernard Shaw (!), Yul Brynner, Claudette Colbert, Colette, Ronald Colman, Gary Cooper, Mercedes De Acosta, Kirk Douglas, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr, Eddie Fisher, John Gilbert, Ernest Hemingway, Howard Hughes, Joseph P Kennedy, JFK, Burt Lancaster, Fritz Lang, Hattie McDaniel, Burgess Meredith, Edward R. Murrow, Edith Piaf, George Raft, Erich Maria Remarque, William Saroyan, Frank Sinatra, Barbara Stanwyck, Adlai Stevenson, Jimmy Stewart, Mike Todd, John Wayne, and Orson Welles.

Dillon, Matt. Reportedly bisexual. Likes being tied up. Alcoholic. Linked with Mariah Carey and Cameron Diaz.

DiMaggio, Joe. Physical abuser of women, including Marilyn Monroe. Whoremonger. Psychopathically cold personality. Treated his family badly. Had mob ties. In sum, as bad at being a person as he was good at playing baseball.

Disney, Walt. Cold fish personality; sexist, racist, anti-Semitic homophobe.

Doherty, Shannon. Completely unpleasant person. Hypocritical conservative. Incredibly hard to work with. Has a long string of failed relationships, from one-night stands (of which there were a number) to ongoing relationships. Bi______; rumored to have been a regular at Playboy Mansion parties and engaged in trysts with Playmates. Breast implants. Linked with Heidi Fleiss, and possibly a former worker for her. Recovering (current?) drug & alcohol addict. Drunk driver. Linked with Judd Nelson and Matthew Perry.

Dole, Bob. Reportedly a good person. Divorced once and had affairs while separated.

Douglas, Ileana. Diva-in-training.

Douglas, Kirk. "The most hated man in Hollywood." Difficult to work with (obviously). Sex addict, and was willing to physically force women to have sex with him. Linked with Lauren Bacall, Joan Crawford, Marlene Dietrich, Rita Hayworth, Patricia Neal, Gene Tierney, and Lana Turner.

Douglas, Michael. Repugnant, contemptible man. Recovering drug & alcohol and sex addict. Linked with Maureen Dowd, Melanie Griffith, Demi Moore, Brenda Vaccaro, and Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Downey, Robert, Jr. Was a penis-struck "human piñata" courtesy of the other inmates in jail; has made lots of new friends in his cell. Has now admitted to several same-sex episodes. Recovering and probably current drug addict. Stalks his ex-girlfriend. Never graduated from high school. Linked with Farrah Fawcett, Calista Flockhart,Sarah Jessica Parker, Winona Ryder, and Uma Thurman.

Downey, Roma. Linked with married man Michael Nouri.

Drescher, Fran. Yet another failed Hollywood marriage.

Dreyfuss, Richard. Recovering drug & alcohol addict. Difficult to work with. Good liberal, though. Closeted FOD or bisexual.

Driver, Minnie. Possibly not nearly so sweet as she likes to be portrayed. Linked with Josh Brolin, John Cusack, Matt Damon, David Duchovny, Joey Fatone (of NSYNC), Harrison Ford, Chris Isaak, Mick Jagger (oh, yuch), David Schwimmer, and Elliot Smith.

Drudge, Matt. FOD and egg fetishist who's done great damage to his gay brothers and sisters by aiding the cause of fascists, intolerant orthodox Christians, and conservative scum. Ethically challenged hypocritical lackey and moral catamite to right-wingers. We remember you from the old days, Matt-o, and when you fall back to obscurity we'll be waiting with sharpened knives.

Dryer, Fred. Difficult to work with. Conservative yahoo.

Duchovny, David. Married to Tea Leoni; deals with his separation from her by engaging in steamy phone-sex with her. Pothead. Reportedly likes strippers and young women. Likes porn--a lot. Hard to work with. Formerly with Gillian Anderson (allegedly fathered her child), Minnie Driver, and Winona Ryder.

Dunaway, Faye. Difficult to work with; was once voted "worst passenger" by a group of H'wood limo drivers. Very cheap, very self-absorbed. Linked with Marlon Brando, Lenny Bruce, Michael Caine, Marcello Mastroianni, Steve McQueen, Jack Nicholson, and Peter Wolf.

Duncan, Isadora. Aggressively Bi_______, and quite enjoyed herself. Linked with Mercedes De Acosta and a cast of thousands.

Dunst, Kirsten. "Stuck-up," although since writing that I've gotten several e-mails attesting to Kirsten being really sweet. Caught smoking pot in public (not smart, girl, not smart). Linked with Heath Ledger and Tobey Maguire.

Duritz, Adam. Linked with Jennifer Aniston, Lara Flynn Boyle, Courtney Cox, Winona Ryder, and Gwen Stefani. (Having typed this, I will now light myself on fire.) (I stole that line from ESPN's brilliant Sports Guy.)

Dylan, Bob. Has treated his women badly; numerous sexual diseases. Linked with Joan Baez, Sheryl Crow, & Pamela Des Barres.

Earle, Steve. Recovering addict.

Eastwood, Clint. Refreshingly modest and down-to-Earth personality. Did not treat Sondra Locke particularly well in his relationship with her, though, and has a problem with staying faithful. Possible early same-sex relationship with his mentor Arthur Lubin. Also linked with Francis Fisher and Babs Streisand.

Eden, Barbara. Inexplicably popular in Japan. Reportedly now shopping her fading charms around for cash.

Eddy, Nelson. Not, contrary to what I said earlier, gay; was, rather, devoted to Jeanette MacDonald. (How sweet!)

Eggert, Nicole. Hygienically challenged. Drug/alcohol problems.

Ekberg, Anita. Linked with Gary Cooper & Marcello Mastroianni.

Ekland, Britt. Linked with Warren Beatty, George Hamilton, Ryan O'Neal, Peter Sellers, Rod Stewart.

Electra, Carmen. Admits to same-sex affairs. Will use the casting couch to get roles. Linked with Vin Diesel, Fred Durst (of Limp Bizkit), Tommy Lee, Dave Navarro, Prince, and Dennis Rodman.

Elfman, Jenna. $cientologist. Linked with Thomas Gibson. Pothead. Given to salty language.

Ellington, Duke. At the least very gay-positive; may have slept with his openly gay collaborator Billy Strayhorn.

Eminem. Described as a nice guy by his friends, but his lyrics are vile and evil. Reportedly closeted very deeply. Linked with Kim Basinger, Beyonce, Mariah Carey, Geri Halliwell, and Elton John.

Eng, Susanna. Tssss...*hot*. Linked with Orlando Bloom, Matt Damon, Seth Green, James Marsters, Lenny Kravitz, Joaquin Phoenix, Eric Stoltz, Benicio del Toro, and Owen Wilson.

Estevez, Emilio. $cientologist. Linked with Paula Abdul (ex-wife) and Demi Moore.

Etheridge, Melissa. Out of the closet L_____. Linked with Meg Ryan, Helen Hunt, and Tammy Lynn Michaels (of Popular).

Evangelista, Linda. L_______; using Kyle MacLachlan as a merkin.

Everett, Rupert. Openly gay; former rentboy. Linked with Beatrice Dalle.

Farley, Chris. "Addicted to everything."

Farrow, Mia. Failed marriages to/relationships with Woody Allen, Eddie Fisher, Ryan O'Neal, Roman Polanski, Andre Previn, Philip Roth, Peter Sellers, Frank Sinatra, and Tom Stoppard. Adopted many refugees from overseas but raised them in dubious manner. Shrill and humorless.

Fawcett, Farrah. Cokehead. Prima donna wanna-be. Slut during her early years as an actress. Married & divorced Lee Majors. Linked with Robert Downey, Jr., Ryan O'Neal, Vincent Van Patten, Burt Reynolds, and Sylvester Stallone. Kleptomaniac.

Feldman, Corey. Obnoxious punk; drug addict & drunkard.

Fenn, Sherilyn. Linked with Johnny Depp Prince, and Kiefer Sutherland.

Fergie, Duchess of York. Has been stalking Tiger Woods. She's also stalked Kevin Costner and George Clooney.

Field, Sally. Linked with Johnny Carson, Kevin Kline, and Burt Reynolds.

Fiennes, Ralph. Overly impressed with himself. Left his wife for an older woman.

Fierstein, Harvey. Sweet, insecure, openly gay.

Finney, Albert. Linked with Anouk Aimee, Audrey Hepburn, Diane Keaton, and Shelley Winters.

Fiorentino, Linda. Enthusiastically played the field--both sides--while in college. Difficult to work with.

Fisher, Carrie. Recovering drug addict. Former wife of Paul Simon. Never graduated from high school. Bipolar, but is finally on the right drug regimen and has her life together again--good for you, Ms. Fisher. Very witty writer. Linked with Ben Affleck (you go, Carrie!) Harrison Ford, and George Lucas.

Fisher, Eddie. Admitted speed user. Linked with Pier Angeli, Ann-Margaret, Marlene Dietrich, Mia Farrow, Judy Garland, Merle Oberon, Stefanie Powers, Debbie Reynolds, Connie Stevens, Elizabeth Taylor, and Mamie Van Doren.

Flatley, Michael. Hilariously vain and conceited dancer. One of several men for whom the phrase "GET OVER YOURSELF" was invented. Divorced his wife. Voted one of the twenty most-hated people in Ireland.

Fleming, Ian. Slut. Wife-swapper and Bi______.

Flockhart, Calista. Anorexic, and rumored to have a heroin jones. Linked with Matt Damon, Robert Downey, Jr., Robert DeNiro, Harrison Ford, David E. Kelley (with whom she cuckolded Michelle Pfeiffer), and Garry Shandling (who deserved much better than and from Flockhart).

Flynn, Errol. "The most despicable human being yet born." "My son had not only been a bad little boy, he had been a nasty little boy." Jerk and Nazi sympathizer--also a spy for the Axis, if rumors are to be believed. A closeted FOD. Anti-Semite. Linked with Truman Capote, Olivia de Havilland, Doris Duke, Howard Hughes, Barbara Hutton, Hedy Lamarr, David Niven, Eva Peron, Tyrone Power, Lana Turner, Gloria Vanderbilt, Lupe Velez, and Shelley Winters.

Fonda, Bridget. Linked with Eric Stoltz and Dwight Yoakum.

Fonda, Henry. Cold man in person, even to his family. Linked with Lucille Ball, Joan Crawford, and Bette Davis.

Fonda, Jane. Ninny. Wasn't faithful to Tom Hayden during their marriage. Breast implants. Multiple plastic surgeries. Linked with Warren Beatty, Alain Delon, James Franciscus, Tom Hayden, Huey Newton, Papa John Phillips, Robert Redford, Donald Sutherland, Ted Turner (failed marriage), and Roger Vadim.

Ford, Glenn. Linked with Joan Crawford, Eva Gabor, Judy Garland, Rita Hayworth, Debbie Reynolds, and Barbara Stanwyck.

Ford, Harrison. Rumored to be a skirt-chasing slut into stripper clubs; wife dumped him when she found out that the rumors were true. Big hemp smoker. Also rumored to be into leather and S&M, as well as being a homophobe. Linked with Lara Flynn Boyle, Lesley Ann Down, Minnie Driver, Carrie Fisher, Calista Flockhart, Julia Ormond, Michelle Pfeiffer, Kristen Scott Thomas, and "about four dozen others."

Ford, John. "An S.O.B., a demonic man. Part of his mercurial personality was to do something he knew was mean or mischievous, then try to justify it." Linked with Katherine Hepburn.

Foster, Jodie. Closeted L______. Reported to be very nice in person. Close "friendship" with homophobe Mel Gibson. Had major falling out with Michael Douglas. Linked with Gillian Anderson, Russell Crowe, Mel Gibson, Rob Lowe, and Kelly McGillis.

Foxx, Redd. Difficult to work with.

Francis, Kay. L______.

Frank, Barney. Out; would make a great president.

Franklin, Aretha. Victim of incest; her first child was her father's.

Franz, Dennis. Can be a jerk.

Fraser, Brendan. Unpleasant personality. FOD. Linked with Alicia Silverstone.

Freeman, Morgan. Heavy ganja smoker. Recovering alcoholic.

Fry, Stephen. Playing for the home team. No longer celibate, as he was for a good long while.

Furlong, Edward. Abuser of women. Drug user. Linked with Natasha Lyonne.

Gable, Clark. Notorious tightwad. Bad breath, and bad in bed. Preferred blondes--had a hang-up about brown/black pubic hair. Used the casting couch to break into Hollywood; had George Cukor fired from Gone With The Wind because Cukor knew that. Committed murderous hit and run, and MGM covered for him. Linked with Joan Crawford, Marion Davies, Olivia de Havilland, Ava Gardner, Paulette Goddard, Jean Harlow, Grace Kelly, Hedy Lamarr, Carole Lombard, Merle Oberon, Louella Parsons, Nancy Davis Reagan, Norma Shearer, Lana Turner, Lupe Velez, Shelley Winters, and Loretta Young.

Gabor, Eva. One of the good Gabor sisters. (Zsa Zsa was the evil one.) Never experienced an orgasm with a man; faked every one of them. Linked with Glenn Ford, Merv Griffin, Tyrone Power, and Frank Sinatra.

Gabor, Zsa Zsa. "The most expensive courtesan since Mme de Pompadour." Vain, arrogant, unpleasant woman. Slapped a cop who -dared- pull her over on a traffic violation. Cheated on every one of her nine husbands. Linked with Richard Burton, Sean Connery, Duke of Saxony, Conrad Hilton, Mustafa Kemal Ataturk (!), JFK, Aly Khan, Henry Kissinger, William S. Paley, Porfirio Rubirosa, George Sanders (after they had divorced and while George was married to Zsa Zsa's sister Magda), Frank Sinatra, and Rafael Trujillo.

Gabriel, Peter. Linked with Laurie Anderson, Roseanne Arquette, Kate Bush, and Sinead O'Connor.

Garbo, Greta. Sad woman; had her career sabotaged by MGM. Rumored to be a man. Linked with Max Baer, Tallulah Bankhead, Louise Brooks, Mercedes De Acosta, Dolores Del Rio, John Gilbert (who she left standing at the altar), Joseph P. Kennedy, Carson McCullers, Ramon Novarro, Erich Maria Remarque, Leopold Stokowski, and William S. Paley.

Garcia, Jerry. Drug addict. Hired by the FBI in 1968 to "channel youth dissent and rebellion into more benign and nonthreatening directions."

Gardner, Ava. "The world's most exciting animal." Temperamental, self-destructive, and a drunk. Linked to Richard Burton, Robert Evans, Clark Gable, Howard Hughes, John Huston, Fernando Lamas, Peter Lawford, Robert Mitchum, David Niven, Mickey Rooney, Porfirio Rubirosa, George C. Scott, Omar Sharif, Artie Shaw, Frank Sinatra, Robert Taylor, Mel Torme, and Lana Turner.

Garfield, John. Good old lefty liberal who was essentially killed by HUAC. Linked with Joan Crawford, Hedy Lamarr, Edith Piaf, Lana Turner, and Shelley Winters.

Garland, Judy. Led a sad & unpleasant life: alcohol, pills, suicide attempts; died from an "accidental" drug overdose. Bisexual. Linked with Dirk Bogarde, Yul Brynner, Eddie Fisher, Glenn Ford, Aly Khan, Peter Lawford, Oscar Levant, Ethel Merman (!), Tyrone Power, Artie Shaw, Frank Sinatra, Robert Stack, Kay Thompson, Spencer Tracy (when JG was 15), and Orson Welles.

Garner, James. FOD married to beard.

Garofalo, Janeane. Janeane, you're wonderful--don't worry about yourself so much! Recovering alcoholic. Linked with Ben Stiller.

Garrett, Leif. Drug user.

Gates, Bill. Poster boy for the Nerd Generation. Is heavily dominated/hen-pecked by his wife. Still unclear whether Gates and Microsoft are only examples of greed, or whether there is a more sinister evil at work. Hygienically challenged; is a "full-on slob." Has this thing where he sometimes rocks uncontrollably in his chair. Had a need for speed (automotive) while young. Reportedly entertains call girls in his office.

Gaynor, Janet. Bisexual. Linked with Mary Martin.

Geer, Will. Closet queen and open communist. Linked with Harry Hay, a pioneer in the American gay rights movement.

Gellar, Sarah Michelle. Recovering anorexic. Prefers to go out with men less famous than she. Has grown too impressed with herself and acted the diva on the set of Scooby Doo. Has hair extension because of the damage all that dyeing has done to her hair. Either "bitchy" and "imperious" or simply too take-charge and aggressive for fragile egos. Linked with David Boreanaz (whose marriage she helped destroy), James Marsters (who she should dump Freddie Prinze Jr. for), Jerry O'Connell, Matthew Perry, and Freddie Prinze Jr (whose attraction, for SMG, is one of the great mysteries of our time).

Gere, Richard. Former husband/merkin to Cindy Crawford. Closet case, although the gerbil-stuffing rumor was spread by Stallone. Likes it rough--very rough. Linked to Kim Basinger, Barbara Carrera, Julia Roberts, Diana Ross, Barbra Streisand, Uma Thurman, John Travolta, Tuesday Weld.

Gershon, Gina. Got her role on "Snoops" by nailing David E. Kelley. Linked with Gillian Anderson, Beck,and Lenny Kravitz.

Gershwin, George. Slut. Linked to Kitty Carlisle, Paulette Goddard, Ginger Rogers, Simone Simon, and Fay Wray.

Gibbons, Leeza. Once upon a time was quite the party girl.

Gibson, Mel. Strident and clueless Catholic. Compulsively cheats on his wife; refuses to let her use birth control. Homophobe and sexist. Alcoholic. Has a taste for Thai hookers; has them flown in while he's on set. Is also a shoe fetishist.

Gielgud, Sir John. Openly gay (good on you, Sir John).

Gifford, Frank. Lackwit husband to Kathy Lee. Cheated on her when given the chance, admitting his taste for pornography. Former client of Heidi Fleiss' brothel. FOD or Bisexual.

Gifford, Kathie Lee. One of the foci of evil in the modern world. Sociopathic personality; emotional abuser of her child; empty-headed & vain. Exploits third-world workers via her clothing line. Does not treat her assistants well. Cheap tipper. Linked with Kevin Costner.

Gilbert, John. Had his career ruined by that SOB Louis B. Mayer. Was left standing at the altar by Greta Garbo. Linked with Clara Bow, Marlene Dietrich, Carole Lombard, Norma Shearer, and Lupe Velez.

Gilbert, Sara. L______.

Gingrich, Newt. Evil, egotistical conservative martinet. Draft-dodger. Divorced once; cheated/cheats on his wife, and reportedly used House offices for trysts. Has oral sex with women so he can claim he didn't sleep with them. Forced ex-wife to sign divorce papers hours after her cancer surgery. Deadbeat dad.

Gish, Lillian. Bisexual.

Givens, Robin. Difficult to work with, although her failed marriage to (and abuse at the hands of) Mike Tyson might explain that. Linked with Michael Jordan, Jason Kidd, Eddie Murphy (when she was 16), Brad Pitt, Malik Sealy, Howard Stern, Mike Tyson, and Forest Whitaker.

Glenn, Scott. Would-be food connoisseur--but a failure at it.

Glitter, Gary. Into kiddie porn.

Goddard, Paulette. Bisexual. Had a lifelong taste for rich men and rich living. Linked with Charlie Chaplin (by marriage), Johnny Carson, Gary Cooper, Clark Gable, George Gershwin, Howard Hughes, John Huston, Aldous Huxley (!), Frida Kahlo (!), Sir Alexader Korda, Burgess Meredith (by marriage), David Niven, Aristotle Onassis, Erich Maria Remarque, Diego Rivera, Artie Shaw, John Steinbeck, Spencer Tracy, John Wayne, and H.G. Wells.

Goldberg, Whoopi. Bi______. Former teenaged streetwalker. Former heroin addict. Formerly involved with Ted Danson (a worse crime?). Possible involvement with Patrick Stewart. Linked with Frank Langella. Hygienically challenged. Difficult to work with.

Goldblum, Jeff. Has let his fame go to his head. Slut. Linked with Geena Davis, Kristin Davis, Laura Dern, and Lisa Marie Presley.

Gooding, Cuba, Jr. Gave way to temptation and cheated on his wife.

Gordon, Ruth. "Very difficult and rather horrible."

Graham, Heather. "Will sleep with anyone if it will advance her career." Coke user. About two cans short of a sixpack. Linked to Drew Barrymore, Ed Burns, Russell Crowe, Benicio del Toro, Heath Ledger, Tobey Maguire, and James Woods.

Grammar, Kelsey. Drug and alcohol problems. Statutory rapist.

Grant, Cary. Difficult to work with. Tightwad. Played both sides of the fence. Linked with Mr. Blackwell, Dyan Cannon, Joan Crawford, Doris Duke, Howard Hughes, Barbara Hutton, Grace Kelly, Sophia Loren, Kim Novak, Ginger Rogers, Randolph Scott, and Mae West.

Grant, Hugh. General idiot and ninny; an Oxbridge grad but reportedly eight sandwiches short of a picnic basket. B_______. Linked with Sandra Bullock and Elizabeth Hurley.

Gray, Macy. Functioning heroin addict, and now back to using crack. Get your Death Pool entry for her in now; you may not have much time.

Gray, Spalding. Reportedly unpleasant in person. Screen debut was in a hard-core porn film--as the star.

Grey, Jennifer. Possible Bi____. Linked with Matthew Broderick, Johnny Depp, and George Stephanopoulos--and, if rumors are true, Madonna, Sandra Bernhard, and/or Debi Mazur.

Grieco, Richard. Conceited. Rapist. Linked with Yasmine Bleeth.

Griffin, Merv. Closeted, but still gay as an Ungaro Spring Frock. Linked to Eva Gabor.

Griffith, Melanie. Broke up Antonio Banderas' marriage, then married him herself. Breast implants. Recovering drunk & drug addict. Homophobe. Formerly with Warren Beatty, Michael Douglas, Ed Harris, Don Johnson, and Ryan O'Neal.

Griffiths, Rachel. Hygienically challenged, and has developed a diva-like attitude since Six Feet Under became successful.

Grohl, Dave. Linked to Christina Aguilera and Winona Ryder, who he did not treat well at all.

Gumbel, Bryant. Prick. Difficult to work with. Wanton philanderer and adulterer, and treated his wife horribly before and during their divorce. Doesn't like cheese.

Gwynne, Fred. Apparently not gay, just manic depressive and unpleasant to work with.

Haas, Lukas. Messed himself up in a big way with drugs; his career might well be over now. Linked with Natalie Portman.

Hagar, Sammy. Pinhead. Likes multiple women at the same time.

Haim, Corey. Reputed drug addict and rent-boy. Linked with Winona Ryder.

Halford, Rob. Out and admitting it.

Halliwel, Geri. L______.

Hamilton, Linda. L_____/bisexual. Linked by marriage with James Cameron; reportedly rebounded from the failure of that marriage with a stuntwoman.

Hancock, Herbie. The nicest, sweetest man in the music business.

Hanks, Tom. A well-meaning and nice man who can and should be forgiven for Forrest Gump--although current rumors have his star status going to his head--a shame, if so. Recovering drug addict. Knocked up his first wife in college.

Hannah, Darryl. "A 25-watt bulb in a 100-watt socket." Hygienically challenged. Has a prosthetic finger/fingertip. Linked with Jackson Browne, Dodi al Fayed, John-John Kennedy, Val Kilmer, and Mickey Rourke.

Hannigan, Alyson. (Willow on Buffy) Into three-ways. Very pleasant woman, and is very well-liked on the Buffy set. Very open, and cheerily so, about her sex life; good for you, Ms. Hannigan.

Harlin, Renny. Unpleasant man, treats his women poorly (cheats on them) and his casts and crew worse. Linked with Geena Davis and Laura Dern.

Harlow, Jean. Died too soon. Linked with Max Baer, Clark Gable, Howard Hawks, Howard Hughes, William Powell, Bugsy Siegel, Jimmy Stewart, and Thomas Wolfe.

Harmon, Angie. Cokehead.

Harrelson, Woody. Major pothead and general oddball (as well as bad poet). Father is a killer. Beats women. Self-described "sex addict." Linked with Glenn Close, Carol Kane, Penelope Ann Miller, Ally Sheedy, Brooke Shields, and Moon Unit Zappa.

Harris, Ed. Substance abuse problems. Formerly with Melanie Griffith. Married to Amy Madigan.

Harris, Neil Patrick. FOD.

Harris, Richard. Recovering drunkard; charming personality, though. Reportedly difficult to work with. Linked with Merle Oberon.

Harrison, Rex. Vain, cold, unpleasant personality; egregiously nasty. Disliked by his fellow actors & actresses. Reported to be impotent. Linked with Carole Landis, Vivien Leigh, and Merle Oberon.

Hart, Melissa Joan. Alcoholic.

Hasselhoff, David. Was enormous in Germany at one time, but thankfully this is no longer so. Depending on who you talk to, either down-to-earth despite his success, or a raging egomaniac. Recovering alcoholic.

Hatch, Orrin. Deeply closeted gay male with a penchant for leather & rent-boys.

Hatcher, Teri. Prima donna and difficult to work with. Linked with Dean Cain.

Hawke, Ethan. Hygienically challenged. Overly impressed with his own intelligence. Failed author. Cokehead. Told friends and strangers, in excruciating detail, about how Uma Thurman’s private parts changed after childbirth (what a moron Hawke is). Linked with Lisa Loeb, Julia Roberts & Uma Thurman, who he married.

Hawn, Goldie. "Close to 60 and dresses like a 20-year-old hooker." Hygienically challenged. Linked with Kurt Russell; lets him cat around on her due to low self-esteem. $cientologist. Couldn't stand Bette Midler on First Wives Club set. Linked with Warren Beatty.

Hayek, Salma. Career has apparently gone to her head. Linked with Ben Affleck and Ed Norton.

Hayes, Isaac. $cientologist.

Hayworth, Rita. Betrayed her Latino heritage and became kept woman of and unpaid prostitute for Howard Hughes--all to stay in Hollywood and be a star. Victim of child abuse. Linked with Kirk Douglas, Glenn Ford, Aly Khan, Peter Lawford, Victor Mature, Robert Mitchum, David Niven, Tyrone Power, Anthony Quinn, James Stewart and Orson Welles (who did not treat her well).

Head, Edith. Straight, believe it or not.

Heard, John. Linked with Cher and Margot Kidder (with whom he's back together now, years after their six-day-long marriage). Abuser of women; accused of stalking second wife Melissa Leo, who was fired from her tv show by the network for fear of bad publicity.

Heche, Anne. L____, bi_____, hetero, who knows? Reported to have a certain difficulty with faithfulness. Reportedly got herpes from her father when he sexually abused her when she was a kid. It's still unclear whether she's insane or whether the press has overblown her mental state. Linked with Ellen Degeneres, Steve Martin, and Vince Vaughn.

Henley, Don. Humorless, vain, full-of-himself prick. Hygienically challenged. Habitue' of Hollywood brothels; likes multiples. Statutory rapist and drug user; got off from consequences of overdosing a teen by spending much money.

Hepburn, Audrey. Possibly the most beautiful woman who ever lived. Deserved better from the men in her life. Linked with Mel Ferrer, Albert Finney, Ben Gazzara, William Holden, JFK, Gregory Peck, and Peter O'Toole.

Hepburn, Katharine. Long-running affair with Spencer Tracy, and longer-running affair with female friend. Reported to have often made use of the services of a high class pimp, requesting patrician blonds. Also linked with Charles Boyer, John Ford, Howard Hughes (whom she had a son by), Jimmy Stewart and Spencer Tracy.

Hershey, Barbara. Had her lips surgically altered. Drug use. Kook. Linked with David Carradine.

Heston, Charlton. Right-wing gun kook. Reportedly likes young girls--and, if rumors are to be believed, young boys, too. Abuser of women. Alcoholic.

Hewitt, Jennifer Love. Home-wrecker; got involved with Scott Bairstow and messed up his marriage. Linked with Alec Baldwin, Carson Daly, Stephen Dorff, Enrique Iglesias, Joey Lawrence, and Shaggy.

Hill, Grant. Linked with Mariah Carey and Jada Pinkett.

Hill, Lauryn. Exploits her personal employees and treats them horribly.

Hoffman, Dustin. Obsessive, conceited perfectionist.

Holden, William. Drunk. Linked with Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Jackie O, Stefanie Powers (who he beat), Barbara Stanwyck, and Shelley Winters.

Holly, Lauren. Ex-wife of Jim Carrey. Indiscreet about his sexual skills. Vain. Linked with Ben Affleck, Ed Burns, Leonardo DiCaprio, Pete Sampras, and Luke Wilson.

Holmes, Katie. "Obsessively searching for drugs to enhance and increase her orgasms." Linked with Joshua Jackson, Chris Klein, and James Van Der Beek.

Hoover, J. Edgar. Closet queen; lifelong companion of his assistant Clyde Tolson. Transvestite. Jerk. Virulent racist. Refused to take actions against American Mafia because they had pictures of him in a dress; blackmailed by CIA after Wild Bill Donovan blackbagged him in the 1930s.

Hope, Bob. "The woman-chaser. The coward. The cheap guy...he thought he was playing a character. He was playing, really, the real Bob Hope." Given to telling racist/sexist/homophobic jokes when the camera isn't running or when he's in front of soldiers. Can't die soon enough.

Hopkins, Anthony. Recovering alcoholic. Linked with Kim Basinger and Emma Thompson.

Hopper, Dennis. Recovering drug addict. Heidi Fleiss customer. Linked with Ursula Andress, Joan Collins, Michelle Phillips, Jean Seberg, Tuesday Weld and Natalie Wood.

Houston, Whitney. Shrill and unpleasant. Hygienically challenged. Was notoriously, infamously unpleasant and hard to work with on the set of Waiting To Exhale. Closeted L_____; married to Bobby Brown, and almost deserves such a fate. Battered wife. Alcoholic and drug abuser. Breast implants. Linked to Enrique Iglesias, Robert De Niro and Kelly McGillis.

Hudson, Kate. "A nut. While growing up Goldie treated her as a peer instead of as a daughter and Kate is bizarre and aimless, will do anything for a good time, drugs, sex, etc. She is bisexual, her husband Chris Robinson actually encourages her to have sex with other women even when he isn't around." Was Yoko Ono in the break-up of the Black Crowes.

Hudson, Rock. Friend Of Dorothy. Reportedly had a long-time relationship with Jim Nabors. Abused by his parents. Linked with Wally Cox, Joan Crawford, James Dean, Elizabeth Taylor and Mamie Van Doren.

Hughes, Howard. Corrupt, evil man who hated everything and everybody; grew insanely concerned about germs later in life, reportedly due to encroaching syphilis. Kept numerous homes for starlets he'd use and cast aside. Often impotent with women; had to have them pretend to be men for him to be aroused. Had Rita Hayworth as a kept woman and pimped her around in exchange for favors. Linked with Bette Davis, Yvonne de Carlo, Olivia De Havilland, Marlene Dietrich, Faith Domergue (when she was 15), Errol Flynn, Ava Gardner, Paulette Goddard, Cary Grant, Jean Harlow, Katharine Hepburn, Barbara Hutton, Hedy Lamarr, Carole Lombard, Ida Lupino, Marilyn Monroe, Jean Peters, Tryone Power, Ginger Rogers, Randolph Scott, Norma Shearer, Gene Tierney, Lana Turner, Gloria Vanderbilt, and Shelley Winters.

Hulce, Tom. FOD.

Hunt, Helen. Closeted L_____ or Bisexual. Notoriously cheap, and unpleasant to her staff. Linked with Gillian Anderson, Hank Azaria, Matthew Broderick, Melissa Etheridge, and Kevin Spacey.

Hunt, Linda. L_____.

Hunter, Rachel. Vain; recovering (current?) heroin addict. Linked with Mark Mcgrath, Rod Stewart (failed marriage), and Robbie Williams.

Hunter, Tab. Open FOD. Linked with Johnny Mathis, Anthony Perkins & Natalie Wood.

Hurley, Elizabeth. Strike-breaking scab. Just possibly might have some problems with faithfulness. May be a dominatrix type. B_______. Linked with Hugh Grant, Denis Leary, Steve Nash, Matthew Perry and Tom Sizemore.

Hurt, John. Reportedly a FOD.

Hurt, William. Dreadfully unpleasant man. Long record of mistreating women. Stingy; drunkard. Formerly with Glenn Close, Mary Beth Hurt, Marlee Matlin, and Sandrine Bonnaire.

Huston, Anjelica. Formerly with Jack Nicholson & Ryan O'Neal. Acts horribly toward her hired help.

Huston, John. "The character he played in Chinatown was John Huston." Could be charming, though; raised his ex-wife's illegitimate daughter as his own. Crackpot. Linked with Mary Astor, Olivia De Havilland, Ava Gardner, Paulette Goddard, and Marilyn Monroe.

Hutton, Timothy. Formerly with Patti Davis, Angelina Jolie, Diane Lane, Mary Louis Parker, Uma Thurman, and Debra Winger. Regular with certain Hollywood prostitutes; Hutton enjoys the occasional menage a trois with them.

Hynde, Chrissy. "Good to her staff and extremely loyal." More of a man than I am. Linked with Ray Davies & Jim Kerr (was married to him)

Idle, Eric (of Monty Python fame). "Unpleasant egomaniac. Brown-noser. Known to treat people like gold until he gets what he wants from them. Personally responsible for the financial ruin of former best friend and ex-Rutle Neil Innes. When he was in Monty Python, he was the only member of the five who wrote bits by himself, instead of with one of the others, because he couldn't get along with any of them. To his credit, he openly admits that he's not a nice person."

Idol, Billy. Regular customer with Heidi Fleiss.

Imbruglia, Natalie. Linked with Lenny Kravitz.

Igelsias, Enrique. FOD, or perhaps Bi______. Grabby and gropey. Linked with Christina Aguilera, Whitney Houston, and Anna Kournikova.

Igelsias, Julio. Slut; given to boasting about his conquests. Linked with Diana Ross.

Irving, Amy. Divorced from Steven Spielberg; cheated on him with Willie Nelson.

Isaak, Chris. Has a thing for Asian women. Various gay rumors. Linked with Margaret Cho (who says he's great in bed), Minnie Driver & Winona Ryder.

Jackman, Hugh. mmmmMM! Very nice guy, humble and faithful to his wife. Possibly a little too friendly with John Travolta. (NOOOO!)

Jackson, Janet. Bi______ with an insatiable sexual appetite. Breast implants. Reportedly mentally & emotionally unstable; abused/neglected as a child, which might explain that. Multiple rumored pregnancies and one child by former husband De Barge who she refuses to admit to. Very much the diva. Linked with Matthew McConaughey, Robert De Niro, Justin Timberlake, and Q-Tip.

Jackson, Joshua. Saved three women from drowning. Linked with Brittany Daniel and Katie Holmes.

Jackson, Kate. Difficult to work with. Unlucky in love. Linked with Edward Albert.

Jackson, Michael. Pedophile. Former Jehovah's Witness. General freak. Has had numerous operations on his face. Strange relationships with Macauley Culkin, Emmanuel Lewis, Tatum O'Neal, Lisa Marie Presley, Diana Ross, Elizabeth Taylor, and his ex-wife, who he never lived with and who got pregnant from him via artificial insemination. Over 40 years old (same age as Prince, BION) and so can no longer blame his many problems on his messed-up childhood.

Jackson, Samuel L. Recovering drug addict.

Jagger, Bianca. Failed marriage to Mick Jagger. Linked with Warren Beatty, Bjorn Borg, David Bowie, Michael Caine, Senator Chris Dodd, Ryan O'Neal, Maximilien Schell, Sen. Bob Torricelli, and Mort Zuckerman.

Jagger, Mick. Former drug user. Stingy. Regular customer of Heidi Fleiss. Bisexual & reportedly linked with David Bowie. Marriages to Jerry Hall & Bianca Jagger. Recent liaison with Minnie Driver; formerly linked with Brigitte Bardot, Eric Clapton, Pamela Des Barres, Janice Dickinson, Tom Driberg, Marianne Faithfull, Allen Ginsberg, Jerry Hall, Brian Jones, Astrid Lindstrom, Madonna, Princess Margaret, Rudolf Nureyev, Mackenzie Phillips, Linda Rondstadt, Carly Simon, Rod Stewart, Uma Thurman, Margaret Trudeau, and Andy Warhol.

Jay-Z. Bi______. Linked with Beyonce.

Jeter, Derek. Linked with Jordana Brewster and Mariah Carey.

Jett, Joan. Open L______.

Jewel. Extremely self-important and condescending. Embarassingly bad poetaster. Linked with Jean Claude van Damme & Sean Penn.

Jillian, Ann. A very nice woman.

Joel, Billy. Recovering addict. Linked with Christie Brinkley.

John, Elton. Openly gay. Recovering drug & alcohol addict. Linked with Eminem (hard to believe, I know).

Johnson, Don. Unpleasant, conceited personality. Former and most likely current drunkard and drug addict; reportedly introduced Jasmine Beeth to coke. Hygienically challenged. Has made use of hookers in the past. Linked with his teen co-star--not his first case of statutory rape, either. Has been seen shopping for sex toys with a male companion. Given to groping women. Linked with Patti D'Arbanville, Pamela Des Barres, Jasmine Bleeth, Melanie Griffith, Penelope Ann Miller, Babs Streisand, and Uma Thurman.

Johnson, Lyndon Baines. "He would screw anything that would crawl." Hired beautiful "secretaries" while President just to have someone to regularly shtup; had one of his aides pimp pretty women seen in crowds for him. Used the power of the Presidency to enrich himself. Actually enjoyed getting under people's skin.

Johnson, Magic. Slut. Pathologically cheated and cheats on his wife. Continues to sleep (sans protection) with random women even after developing AIDS.

Jolie, Angelina. Deadbeat. B_______. "Tempestuous." "Earning herself a reputation as a homewrecker." Likes to cut herself before sex. Drug user. Linked with Antonio Banderas, Timothy Hutton, Billy Bob Thornton, and her own brother(!!!).

Jones, Catherine Zeta. "Insecure, vain, clingy and whiny." A little too impressed with herself. Lies about her age; is actually 10 years older than she claims. Linked with Sean Connery and Michael Douglas (yuch!).

Jones, Davy. A nice guy. A doper, too.

Jones, Jenny. A tyrant to her crew.

Jones, Tom. B_______. Reportedly raped Cassandra "Elvira" Peterson.

Jones, Tommy Lee. Depending on who you talk to, just a good old Texas boy, or a raging prick. Despite public proclamations to the contrary he did not (reportedly) get along with Will Smith on the set of Men in Black, which makes it seem like the latter and not the former is the truth. Reportedly obsessed with fashion models.

Joplin, Janis. May have played both sides of the field. Linked with Bill Bennett (!), Dick Cavett (!), Eric Clapton, Kris Kristofferson, Jim Morrison, Joe Namath, and Peter Tork.

Jordan, Michael. "He's a big ole ho!" Obsessively competitive, to a disturbing degree. Compulsive gambler. Philanderer. Linked with Robin Givens and Vanessa Williams.

Jovovich, Milla. Linked with Luc Besson (by failed marriage) & Bruce Willis.

Judd, Ashley. "A cold fish." Hypocrite who slept with anyone she thought would advance her career. Heavily surgically augmented; "gobbles more antidepressants than you can imagine." Neglects her pets. Linked with Michael Bolton, Jim Carrey, Robert De Niro, and Matthew McConaughey. Tends to be with her costars.

Judd, Wynona. Switch-hitter.

Kaye, Danny. FOD. Linked with Shirley Maclaine, Princess Margaret, and Laurence Olivier (with whom he had a long-time fling).

Keaton, Diane. Linked with Woody Allen, Warren Beatty, Albert Finney, Steve Martin, and Al Pacino.

Keaton, Michael. Has a temper. Linked with Kim Basinger, Courtney Cox, and Michelle Pfeiffer.

Keillor, Garrison. Rumored to be into being dominated. By professionals.

Kelley, David E. Vain. Has done a good job of peddling a quite ludicrous set of exploitive and pandering story lines via his television shows; when religious fundamentalists blame the U.S. for depraving the world, David E. Kelley shows, along with the unspeakable Dawson's Creek, are what they are thinking of. His devotion to casting and bedding women who look like his wife, Michelle Pfeiffer is more than a little nasty; Calista Flockhart is one of the poor women who had to put up with his no-doubt reptilian touch. Used the casting couch to bed Gina Gershon, who is entirely too good for Kelley. Overall, the man has a serious case of the ick.

Kelly, Gene. Jerk, and reportedly a FOD. Sent money to the IRA.

Kelly, Grace. "Sexual tyrannosaurus." Rumored to be a drunk and anti-Semite. Linked with Jean-Pierre Aumont, Oleg Cassini, Gary Cooper, Bing Crosby, Clark Gable, Cary Grant, William Holden, Aly Khan, Ray Milland, David Niven, Prince Rainier, Mohammed Reza Pahlavi, Frank Sinatra, Jimmy Stewart, and Spencer Tracy.

Kelly, R. Had an affair with Aaliyah when she was only 15. Is into three-ways and sex with underage women. Jerk.

Kennedy, John F. Cheated on Jackie with anything that came within 50 feet of him. Bad in bed. Poorly endowed. Typical Kennedy (read: schmuck) when it came to women. Linked with Joan Crawford, Angie Dickinson, Marlene Dietrich, Judy Exner (who was also a Mafia man's woman), Zsa Zsa Gabor, Sonja Henie, Audrey Hepburn, Sophia Loren, Jayne Mansfield, Marilyn Monroe, Lee Remick, Norma Shearer, Blaze Starr, and Gene Tierney.

Kennedy, John F, Jr (John-John). May have played for the home team while at Brown. Linked with Daryl Hannah, Madonna, Christine Onassis, Sarah Jessica Parker, Brooke Shields, and Xuxa.

Kennedy, Joseph P. Father to JFK. Fascist. Nazi sympathizer. Bootlegger. Fixer of elections. Cheated on long-suffering wife with Marion Davies, Marlene Dietrich, Greta Garbo, and Gloria Swanson.

Kennedy, Robert F. Linked with Candice Bergen, Jayne Mansfield, Marilyn Monroe, Kim Novak, and Rudolf Nureyev (in a phone both, of all places).

Kennedy, Ted. Drunkard. Failed marriage behind him. Rampant horndog. Killed a woman in accident and tried to cover it up. One of Washington's biggest sluts.

Kensit, Patsy. Linked with Jim Kerr and Liam Gallagher.

Kerr, Jim. Linked with Chrissie Hynde (by marriage) & Patsy Kensit.

Keys, Alicia. There's a bright light shining here--through both her ears, unimpeded by grey matter. Mysteriously overrated as a musician; professional musicians sneer (when they're being kind) at her piano playing and arrangements.

Kidman, Nicole. Acted the beard for Tom Cruise. L______. Not a $cientologist--no, really! Temperamental; difficult to work with. Regular at certain L.A. girl bars. Forces her gay lovers to sign lengthy non-disclosure contracts before she gets involved with them. Is generally seen to have been the victim in the break-up of her marriage with Tom Cruise. The divorce reportedly was caused partially by Cruise's insistence on raising the kids $cientologist (she wanted them raised Catholic) and partially because of her pregnancy, which may have been his and may have been Ewan McGregor's. Linked with Ben Affleck, Russell Crowe, Vin Diesel, Tobey Maguire, and Ewan McGregor.

Kilborn, Craig. Empty-headed, arrogant, smug, sexually-harassing asshole.

Kilmer, Val. B_______. Reportedly very hard to work with; also rumored to have a problem with violence. Conceited, and unpleasant to his personal assistants. (Although, to be fair, I'm told that he has mellowed out considerably in the past couple of years and is no longer the enfant terrible of Hollywood legend.) Mooches food off of other people's plates. Linked with Cher, Cindy Crawford (merkin duty), Drew Barrymore, Darryl Hannah, Michelle Pfeiffer, Elizabeth Shue, Mira Sorvino, Joanne Whalley (he reportedly beat her), and Mare Winningham.

King, Larry. General creep; lousy in relationships, hygienically challenged and ignorant of politesse, manners, and common courtesy. Likes much younger women. Linked with Angie Dickinson.

King, Stephen. Recovering drug and alcohol addict.

Kinski, Nastassja. Recovering alcoholic. Linked with Dean Cain, Gerard Depardieu, Milos Forman, Quincy Jones, Rob Lowe, Marcello Mastroianni, Dudley Moore, Roman Polanski (when she was 16), Jon Voight, and Wim Wenders.

Kirk, Tommy. Closeted for years, now out.

Kissinger, Henry. Sycophant to kings and presidents; is a corrupt, vain, amoral and oily would-be Richilieu on whose hands are the blood of millions. Humanity is the poorer for having produced such as he. Linked with Candice Bergen, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Shirley Maclaine, Jill St. John, Marlo Thomas, and Liv Ullman.

Klein, Calvin. HIV+.

Kline, Kevin. Reportedly has had at least one same-sex affair. Linked with Phoebe Cates (his wife of 10+ years), Glenn Close, Sally Field, Mary Beth Hurt, Patti LuPone, Linda Ronstadt, and Meryl Streep.

Kmetko, Steve. Admitted FOD. Linked with Greg Louganis.

Knievil, Evel. Has turned into a bitter old crank in his old age.

Knotts, Don. A very nice man.

Kravitz, Lenny. Hygienically challenged. Linked with Lisa Bonet (his ex-wife), Susanna Eng, Gina Gershon, Kate Hudson, Natalie Imbruglia, Kate Moss, Kylie Minogue, Vanessa Paradis, and Robyn.

Kristofferson, Kris. Pothead. Linked with Janis Joplin, Carly Simon, and Babs Streisand.

Kubrick, Stanley. Self-hating Jew; a "tyrannical taskmaster" and an overrated filmmaker.

Kulp, Nancy (Miss Hathaway on Beverly Hillbillies). Bisexual.

Kuralt, Charles. Simultaneously kept a wife in NYC and a mistress in Montana who he'd visit while on the road.

Ladd, Alan. Died of an "accidental" overdose of alcohol and sedatives.

Lake, Veronica. Schizophrenic and drunkard. Had a well-earned reputation for being very unprofessional. Linked with Milton Berle, Victor Mature, Joe McCarthy, Ari Onassis, and Porfirio Rubirosa.

Lamarr, Hedy. Linked with Jean-Pierre Aumont, Charles Boyer, Johnny Carson, Errol Flynn, Clark Gable, John Garfield, Stewart Granger, Howard Hughes, Burgess Meredith, David Niven, Otto Preminger, George Sanders, Rudy Vallee,

Lancaster, Burt. Bisexual. Difficult to work with. Drunkard. Linked with Marlene Dietrich & Shelley Winters.

Lanchester, Elsa. Bisexual; beard for Charles Laughton.

Landers, Ann. She and her sister gave their all for the troops on leave during WW2. Sometimes they gave their all at the same time, in the same room, with two different men.

Landon, Michael. Pious, sanctimonious hypocrite. Philandering boozebag.

Lane, Diane. Linked with Christopher Atkins, Bon Jovi, Josh Brolin, Timothy Hutton, and Christopher Lambert.

Lang, KD. Openly gay. Linked with Ellen Degeneres.

Lange, Jessica. In failing relationship with Sam Shepard; also linked to Mikhail Baryshnikov, Bob Fosse, and Jack Nicholson.

LaSalle, Eriq. Prima donna.

Lauer, Matt. Quintessential talking head--and not in a good way. Has a problem with flatulence due to excessive intake of Vitamin C.

Laughton, Charles. Closeted Friend of Dorothy. Unhappy man.

Lawford, Peter. Drunk. Drug user. Acted as panderer for JFK. Raised as a girl until the age of 9; abused as a child by his nanny. Linked with Lucille Ball, Dorothy Dandridge, Ava Gardner, Judy Garland, Rita Hayworth, Kim Novak, Nancy Davis Reagan, Elizabeth Taylor and Lana Turner.

Lawrence, Martin. Unpleasant personality. Sexually harassed female costar of his show. Given to very public bursts of insanity. Statutory rapist; violated the Mann Act. Diva who thinks he's above petty things like rehearsals.

Lawrence, T. E. (You know, "of Arabia.") Enjoyed being whipped with a birch.

Leary, Timothy. Hygienically challenged and likely driven insane from his drug use.

LeBlanc, Matt. Closeted Friend of Dorothy. Rude and a jerk.

LeBrock, Kelly. Linked with Janice Dickinson, Steven Seagal, and Rod Stewart (Lord, if I'd gone out with the latter two I'd be a lesbian, too)

Ledger, Heath. Hard to work with. Linked to Kirsten Dunst, Heather Graham, Tara Reid, and Naomi Watts.

Lee, Spike. Habitual philanderer.

Lee, Tommy. Hygienically challenged ex-husband of Pamela Anderson Silicone. Wouldn't score 700 on the SATs and probably couldn't spell his last name without assistance. Also linked with Carmen Electra and Heather Locklear. Abuser of women.

LeGuin, Ursula K. Bisexual.

Leigh, Vivien. Manic depressive; towards the end of her life, was acting out "nymphomaniacal tendencies" with any number of men. Linked with Jean-Pierre Aumont, Warren Beatty, Peter Finch, Rex Harrison, Sir Alexander Korda, and Laurence Olivier.

Lennon, John. Physically abusive and unfaithful to his women.

Lennon, Julian. Drug user/abuser.

Leno, Jay. Into bondage.

Leoni, Tea. Married to David Duchovny. Pothead. Got costars thrown off her tv show because they took attention away from her. Likes to dress up in her sexplay with Duchovny.

Letterman, David. Astoundingly insecure and neurotic; major self-esteem issues. Relax, David, we all love you! Besides, anyone with any sense can see that Leno is a suck-up and a schmuck. Dave, you're the man.

Levinson, Barry. FOD.

Lewis, Daniel Day. Formerly with Isabelle Adjani--broke up with her by fax (what a jerk). Vain and "eccentric." Reported drug user. Linked with Sinead O'Connor, Julia Roberts, Winona Ryder, and Greta Scacchi.

Lewis, Emmanuel. Very friendly, very cool.

Lewis, Jerry. Pompous, arrogant exploiter of diseased children. Can't understand why his film about a clown in a Nazi death camp is in bad taste. Never graduated from high school. Difficult to work with. Sexist. Percodan addict.

Lewis, Juliette. $cientologist. Looks hygienically challenged, even if she isn't really. A bit touched in the head. Linked with Leonardo DiCaprio, Johnny Depp, and Brad Pitt.

Lewis, Richard. Hooked on phone sex.

Liddy, G. Gordon. Flunky to Nixon. Convicted criminal. Cheerfully amoral.

Lil Kim. Might not be the biggest diva on Earth, but she tries harder.

Limbaugh, Rush. Conceited, morally bankrupt fascist. Divorced several times. Draft dodger. Long record of not voting, despite his political views.

Liotta, Ray. Helped break up Mark Grace's marriage by luring his wife away from him.

Lithgow, John. Reportedly a very nice man, although when I was a wee lad, he'd beat me up on the way to school, take my lunch money, stick my head down the school toilet, give me double-jock-locks and snicker-snag on me. No, really!

Liu, Lucy. Has apparently let her fifteen minutes go to her head. Hard to work with. Linked with George Clooney and Matt Damon.

LL Cool J. Porn addict. Bi______. Has dated at least one transsexual.

Lloyd, Emily. Suffers from obsessive-compulsive disorder.

Lockhart, June. Still enjoys chasing those younger men.

Locklear, Heather. Married to Richie Sambora. Linked with Scott Baio, Tom Cruise, Mark Harmon, and Tommy Lee.

Lombard, Carole. Linked with Gary Cooper, Clark Gable, John Gilbert, Howard Hughes, David Niven, William Powell, Anthony Quinn, George Raft, Cesar Romero, David O. Selznick, and Preston Sturges.

Long, Shelley. Difficult to work with. Doesn't like to read big books because her lips get tired.

Lopez, Jennifer. "The bitchiest girl in showbiz." Linked with Ben Affleck (in what is rumored to be a publicity stunt), P. Diddy, and Ralph Fiennes.

Loren, Sophia. Linked with Gary Cooper, Cary Grant, JFK, Marcello Mastroianni, Peter Sellers, and Omar Sharif.

Louganis, Greg. Openly gay. Linked with Steve Kmetko.

Louise, Tina. Reportedly exchanging sex for the money of rich older men.

Love, Courtney. Bisexual. Widow of Kurt Cobain. Teen stripper. Breast implants (since removed). Several cosmetic surgeries, including four tummy tucks as well as extensive facial work. Given to revealing skin during her live shows. Former drug user; may still be overusing prescription drugs and alcohol. Can be hard to work with. Reportedly linked to Drew Barrymore, Jim Carrey (Courtney, what were you thinking?), Billy Corgan (either while Kurt was still alive or before she met Kurt--accounts differ), Russell Crowe, Evan Dando, Ed Norton, Trent Reznor, Paul Rudd, Winona Ryder, and Scott Weiland. Needs someone like me to talk to about her troubles.

Lowe, Rob. Caught on tape enjoying favors of an underage girl in the company of another man. Slut. Never graduated from high school; couldn't tell you who's buried in Grant's Tomb. Has acquired a well-earned diva reputation on the set of West Wing. Linked with Jodie Foster (merkin duty), Melissa Gilbert, Fawn Hall, Nastassja Kinski, Demi Moore, Ally Sheedy, and Princess Stephanie.

Loy, Myrna. Bisexual. Linked with William Powell.

Lugosi, Bela. Drug addict towards the end of his life.

Luscious Jackson. On occasion acted like complete assholes.

Lynch, David. Alien. Linked with Isabella Rossellini, who he did not treat well.

Lynde, Paul. Adorable queen.

Lyonne, Natasha. Drug user. Linked with Edward Furlong.

Macdonald, Norm. Gambling problem. Alcohol/drug problem. It might be an act, or he might really be a stupid prick.

Macdowell, Andie. The light's on upstairs, but nobody's home. Possibly mildly retarded. Seems to have an aversion, in private life, to wearing any clothes. Recovering drug addict. Linked with Dennis Quaid.

MacGraw, Ali. Claims to be a recovering sex addict. Linked with Salvador Dali, Robert Evans, Steve McQueen, Ryan O'Neal, and Peter Weller.

MacLachlan, Kyle. Rumored to be well-hung. Linked with Lara Flynn Boyle, Laura Dern, and Linda Evangelista.

Maclaine, Shirley. General kook. Highly obnoxious. Very stingy and not friendly to the public. Linked with Alain Delon, Elton John, Danny Kaye, Henry Kissinger, Robert Mitchum, Yves Montand, Frank Sinatra, and Kenneth Tynan.

Macpherson, Elle. Former coke addict. Linked with Kevin Costner & Sean Penn.

Madden, John. "A belligerent buffoon."

Madonna. Switch-hitter. Openly lusted for but never got Antonio Banderas. Formerly with Warren Beatty, Sandra Bernhard, Bobby Brown, Gabriel Byrne, Willem Dafoe, D'angelo, Mick Jagger, John-John Kennedy, Jack Nicholson, Sean Penn, Prince, Dennis Rodman, and Henry Rollins, and possible Jennifer Grey and/or Debi Mazur; currently with Guy Ritchie, who certainly married up. Hygienically challenged. Penny-pincher. Hired many of Heidi Fleiss' people for her own purposes.

Maguire, Tobey. FOD or Bi______. A very sweet, regular guy. Linked with Kirsten Dunst, Heather Graham, and Nicole Kidman.

Maher, Bill. Incredible horndog; would diddle the alligators if they drained the pond. Masturbates before every taping of his tv show; has it written into his contract that the producers must give him 15 minutes to do so. Rumored not to be a very nice person.

Malden, Karl. Confirmed user of rentboys.

Malkovich, John. Reportedly a prick & a "pompous gaseous windbag." Linked with Glenne Headley and Michelle Pfeiffer.

Malle, Louis. Liked little boys. Married to Candice Bergen and cheated on her, the putz. Linked with Brigitte Bardot, Jeanne Moreau, and Susan Sarandon.

Manilow, Barry. Playing for the home team.

Mansfield, Jayne. Smart woman who deserved better. Did not have good luck with men. Member of the Church of Satan. Linked with Oleg Cassini, JFK, RFK, Henry Miller, and Porfirio Rubirosa.

Manson, Marilyn. Self-important little pud. Coke addict; decided, during one recent tour, to become the biggest asshole in existence, and has started throwing feces at people. Linked with Rose McGowan and Parker Posey.

Mantle, Mickey. Drunkard. A regular at NYC brothels while he played for the Satanic, child-abusing, women-slapping New York Yankees. Friends with Mob-linked bookies.

Maguire, Tobey. Linked with Kirsten Dunst.

Margaret, Princess. Chock full o'prejudices: Anti-Indian, Anti-Irish, Anti-Semite. Linked to Mick Jagger & Danny Kaye.

Margulies, Julianna. Prima donna.

Marsalis, Wynton. Failed long-time relationship with Victoria Rowell.

Marshall, Penny. Past (present?) drug user. Formerly married to Rob Reiner.

Marsters, James. Linked with Susanna Eng and Sarah Michelle Gellar.

Martin, Dean. Drunk. Used Mob connections to break into the music biz. Linked with Jacqueline Bisset, Catherine Deneuve, Marilyn Monroe, and Lana Turner.

Martin, Mary. Bisexual. Linked with Janet Gaynor.

Martin, Ricky. FOD. Has officially let fame go to his head.

Martin, Steve. Long string of unhappily-ended relationships, which would imply that the rumors of him being a prick are true. Reportedly boring in bed. Dumped by Anne Heche for Ellen DeGeneres. Linked with Helena Bonham Carter, Diane Keaton, Stephanie Seymour, and Victoria Tennant (who left him because he was "dull").

Masterson, Danny. (From That 70s Show) $cientologist.

Mastroianni, Marcello. At least one same-sex experience. Linked with Ursula Andress, Jacqueline Bisset, Faye Dunaway, Catherine Deneuve, Anita Ekberg, Nastassja Kinski, Sophia Loren, and Jeanne Moreau.

Mathis, Johnny. FOD. Linked with Tab Hunter.

Mathis, Samantha. Pothead. Was with River Phoenix the night he died. Linked with Christian Slater.

Matlin, Marlee. Formerly with Richard Dean Anderson & William Hurt.

Matthews, Dave. Bi_______, but not currently playing the field.

Mature, Victor. Linked with Rita Hayworth, Veronica Lake, Elizabeth Taylor, Gene Tierney, and Lana Turner.

McConaughey, Matthew. Self-absorbed jerk. Possible FOD. Pothead. Formerly with Sandra Bullock, Janet Jackson, and Ashley Judd. Horndog, and by one account a rapist who stalked and terrorised a woman from 1993-2000.

McDaniel, Hattie. Bi______. Linked with Tallulah Bankhead & Marlene Dietrich.

McDermott, Dylan. Formerly with Julia Roberts.

McDowell, Roddy. FOD. Rumored to be able to pleasure himself orally, and willing to do so at parties. Linked with James Dean and Farley Granger.

McEnroe, John. Unpleasant personality. Linked with Tatum O'Neal & Patty Smythe.

McGillis, Kelly. Closeted L_____. Linked with Jodie Foster and Whitney Houston.

McGowan, Rose. Jerk. Exhibitionist. Grew up in the anti-Semitic Children of God cult. Used the casting couch to get a part in Scream. Linked with Marilyn Manson.

McGovern, Elizabeth. Formerly with Sean Penn and Rob Reiner.

McKellan, Ian. FOD.

McLaughlin, John. Former Jesuit. Penchant for much younger women, rough sex and bondage. Given to racist and sexist comments; several sexual harassment suits against him. A monster to work for, although he once did me a big favor.

McNichol, Kristy. Difficult to work with. Manic-depressive. L_____.

McQueen, Steve. All-time slut. Could be difficult to work with. Tightwad; alcoholic and drug addict. Formerly with Jacqueline Bisset, Ann-Margaret, Judy Carne, Faye Dunaway, Ali MacGraw, Sharon Tate, Mamie Van Doren, and Natalie Wood.

McRaney, Gerald. General jerk; fascist. Married to Delta Burke (they deserve each other).

Meadows, Tim. FOD, with a preference for white men.

Menjou, Adolphe. Unpleasant personality. Sang like a diva to HUAC.

Meredith, Burgess. Linked with Lauren Bacall, Tallulah Bankhead, Ingrid Bergman, Olivia De Havilland, Marlene Dietrich, Paulette Goddard, Hedy Lamarr, Ginger Rogers, and Norma Shearer.

Merman, Ethel. L______/bisexual. Marriage to Ernest Borgnine (lasted only a month). Linked with Judy Garland and Jacqueline Susann.

Michael, George. "Hung like a tse-tse fly." FOD, and now open about it. Used Brooke Shields as a beard.

Miller, Dennis. By several reports the biggest prick in Hollywood. (I realise there's stiff competition for that role, but that's how folks in the business describe Miller.)

Miller, Penelope Ann. Linked with Matthew Broderick, Woody Harrelson, Don Johnson, and Al Pacino.

Mineo, Sal. Closet queen. Linked with James Dean and Tuesday Weld.

Minnelli, Liza. "The world's most famous zombie." Pill popper. Booze-bag. Undead. Breast implants. Linked with Eddie Albert, Adam Ant, Charles Aznavour, Mikhail Baryshnikov, Ryan O'Neal, Joe Pesci, Geraldo Rivera, Martin Scorsese, Peter Sellers, Gene Simmons, and Ben Vereen.

Mitchum, Robert. Long time (several decades) drug user. Cheated on his wife (boo). Anti-Semite. Linked with Lucille Ball, Ava Gardner, Rita Hayworth, Shirley Maclaine, and Marilyn Monroe.

Mizrahi, Isaac. Straight. Linked with Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, and Cynthia Nixon.

Moby. What a sweet guy! I just want to give him a big hug every time I see him. (But he's rumored to be a spreader of STDs--say it ain't so, Moby!) Linked with Natalie Portman and Christina Ricci.

Monroe, Marilyn. Drunk and drug abuser. Failed marriages/relationships with Milton Berle, Marlon Brando, Yul Brynner, Oleg Cassini, Paddy Chayefsky, Tony Curtis, Sammy Davis Jr, Joe Dimaggio, Blake Edwards, Albert Einstein, Howard Hughes, John Huston, Elia Kazan, JFK, RFK, Dean Martin, Arthur Miller, Robert Mitchum, Yves Montand, Mickey Rooney, Porfirio Rubirosa, George Sanders, Bugsy Siegel, Frank Sinatra, Mel Torme, and Orson Welles. Did not enjoy sex, but used it to gain things from men (and, reportedly, some women, including her drama coach). Difficult to work with. Employed casting couch and casting kneepads to break into Hollywood, and starred in at least one porn film pre-stardom.

Moore, Demi. "Not very bright or talented."Very nasty separation from Bruce Willis, although they may be back together. Never graduated from high school. Former high-priced Las Vegas callgirl. Achieved her breathy voice by permanently and deliberately damaging her vocal cords. Ego roughly the size of the Kingdome. Difficult to work with. Cheapskate. Former drug user & abuser. More than one breast implant operation. $cientologist, but was forced to leave the cult by Willis when she tried to "convert" the kids. Bisexual, if not practising. Linked with Leonardo DiCaprio, Michael Douglas, Emilio Estevez, Anthony Kiedis, Rob Lowe, and Brad Pitt, and Ally Sheedy.

Moore, Dudley. Alcoholic and drug user. Abuser of women. Linked with Susan Anton, Nastassja Kinski, and Tuesday Weld.

Moore, Mary Tyler. Has led an unhappy life. Recovering drunkard. Attempted (but failed) to mercy-kill her dying brother. Breast implants.

Moore, Roger. FOD.

Moorehead, Agnes. Bisexual. Linked with Debbie Reynolds.

Moran, Erin. Quite spunky during Happy Days, when she was sparking Scott Baio 6-8 times a day, sometimes behind the set; now a dull and self-righteous born-again Christian.

Morrison, Jim. Drug user and abuser of women. Linked to Pamela Des Barres, Janis Joplin, and Nico.

Morrissette, Alanis. Manipulative sell-out who changed images when she reached her age of majority and could legally capitalize on her sexuality. Says she doesn't drink or do drugs but that she loves sex; rumors are that she quite indulged herself in that regard as a teenager. Reportedly bisexual.

Mortensen, Viggo. Deee-licious. Linked with Exene Cervenka and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Moss, Kate. Drug user. Linked with Johnny Depp, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jade Jagger, Lenny Kravitz, and Billy Zane.

Mullalley, Megan. Openly B_______. (Oh, be still my heart!)

Murphy, Brittany. L______. Linked with Winona Ryder.

Murphy, Eddie. Has penchant for transsexual hookers; reported foot fetishist to boot. Greedy. Habitually late on-set. Difficult to work with. Linked with Halle Berry & Naomi Campbell.

Murray, Bill. Good tipper.

Nabors, Jim. Gay as an Ungaro Spring Frock. Reportedly had long-time relationship with Rock Hudson.

Najimy, Kathy. L_____."An utter *****. Horrible to staff, and surprisingly humorless offstage. Only nice to folks she considers more important, ie can help with her career."

Nastase, Ilie. Unpleasant personality. Racist.

Neeson, Liam. Not what one could call faithful to his women, and apparently doesn't limit himself to just women. Linked to Janice Dickinson, Helen Mirren, Sinead O'Connor, Natasha Richardson (his wife), Julia Roberts, Brooke Shields, and Barbra Streisand.

Negri, Pola. Linked with Johnny Carson, Charlie Chaplin, and Rudolph Valentino.

Neill, Sam. Very charming in person, or so I'm told.

Nelson, Judd. Drug addict. Jerk. Roundly loathed in Portland, Maine, where he is originally from. Regular customer with Heidi Fleiss. Linked to Shannon Doherty.

Nelson, Willie. Reportedly hygienically challenged. Nice man in person, though. Linked with Amy Irving.

Nesmith, Mike. "His mother actually did invent liquid paper, which netted him $30 million dollars when she died. He's a control freak, stemming from early poor days of selling pots of correction fluid business-door-to-door and only eating that night if successful."

Neuwirth, Bebe. Difficult to work with. Cokehead. Linked to Kevin Spacey and George Stephanopoulos.

Newhart, Bob. A genuinely nice and modest man.

Newman, Paul. FOD in a beard-merkin arrangement with wife Joanne Woodward. Linked with Tom Cruise.

Newton, Wayne. "Hung like a gnat."

Newton-John, Olivia. Bi______. Linked with John Travolta.

Nicholson, Jack. Insane. Physically abusive towards women. Reportedly enjoyably zany half the time and incredibly insufferable the other half of the time. Reputed drug user (enormous quantities). Slut; reportedly competed (competes?) with Warren Beatty for most women rogered. Regular at certain Hollywood brothels; likes multiples. Grew up believing his grandmother was his mother and his mother was his sister. Linked with Drew Barrymore (at a very young age), Candice Bergen, Lara Flynn Boyle, Janice Dickinson, Faye Dunaway, Anjelica Huston, Jessica Lange, Madonna, Michelle Phillips, Meryl Streep, and Margaret Trudeau.

Nicks, Stevie. Egotist. Is to fashion what Mike Tyson is to civilised behaviour. Claims she hasn't had sex with a man since 1994. Bi______. Big cokehead, but is afraid that it will damage her vocal chords and so has her assistant blow it into her anally. (Isn't that grotesquely delicious gossip?)

Nielsen, Brigitte. More of a man than I am. Breast implants. Failed marriage to Sly Stallone. L_____. Can be had if you've got the money.

Nimoy, Leonard. Recovering alcoholic.

Niven, David. Suave, wry man. The opposite of Ronald Reagan with regards to their WW2 experiences; Reagan boasted, repeatedly, that he saw action, which was a lie, while Niven, who was one of the first British actors to enlist and who was part of the D-Day invasion, was quite modest about it. Linked with Doris Duke, Errol Flynn, Ava Gardner, Paulette Goddard, Rita Hayworth, Grace Kelly, Deborah Kerr, Hedy Lamarr, Carole Lombard, Merle Oberon, Ginger Rogers, Norma Shearer, Simone Simon, Mae West and Loretta Young.

Nixon, Richard. Evil man--corrupt, racist, anti-Semite homophobe. Almost single-handedly responsible for robbing America of its faith in the presidency. Addicted to Dilantin. Beat his wife.

Nolte, Nick. Not as sober as he pretends to be. DUI arrest. Linked with Debra Winger.

Norton, Ed. Linked with Cameron Diaz, Salma Hayek, and Courtney Love.

Novak, Kim. Reportedly...well, this smacks of urban legend, but reportedly Kim Novak had "testicular feminization syndrome" and "was genetically a male." Linked with Sammy Davis, Jr, Cary Grant, RFK, Aly Khan, Peter Lawford, Porfirio Rubirosa, and Frank Sinatra.

Novarro, Ramon. Killed by rough trade hustlers & left with a dildo (inscribed to him from Rudolf Valentino) anally inserted. Linked with Greta Garbo.

Nureyev, Rudolf. "The Great Vaselino." Played all sides of the field. Linked with Leonard Bernstein, Margot Fonteyn, Mick Jagger, Robert F. Kennedy (in a phone booth, no less), Robert Mapplethorpe, Freddie Mercury, Anthony Perkins, and Michelle Phillips.

Oberon, Merle. Liked her men, even while married. Linked with Jimmy Cagney, Maurice Chevalier, Gary Cooper, Eddie Fisher, Clark Gable, Richard Harris, Rex Harrison, Leslie Howard, David Niven, and Darryl F. Zanuck.

O'Brien, Pat. Closet case.

O'Connor, Carol. Son overdosed on drugs.

O'Connor, Sinead. Went from heterosexual to bi_____ to avowed L______ to married woman; where she's going now, nobody knows. Pot user. Linked with Daniel Day-Lewis, Peter Gabriel, Liam Neeson, and Prince.

O'Donnell, Chris. Formerly with Drew Barrymore and Sandra Bullock.

O'Donnell, Rosie. Finally out of the closet, which I'm sure is a great comfort to the tens of thousands of gay men and women who might have been comforted by the gay role model Rosie would have provided; but, obviously, making money and telling lies about yourself is much more important than helping other people. Fangirl made good. Unpleasant towards cast and crew any time the cameras aren't rolling. Unpleasantly obsessed with Tom Cruise. Now openly unpleasant to everybody, down to making jokes about people dying with cancer. Calls herself a "*****;" well, if the shoe fits, Rosie....

Oldman, Gary. Eccentric (to put it politely). Major heroin/alcohol monkey on his back. Linked to Isabella Rossellini & Uma Thurman (failed marriage).

Olivier, Laurence. "Pretentious megalomaniac." FOD. Linked with Greer Garson, Danny Kaye (a long-time partner), and Vivien Leigh.

Olmos, Edward James. Reputed child molester. Linked to Lorraine Bracco via failed marriage.

Olsen, Susan. DUI twice.

Onassis, Aristotle. Linked with Maria Callas, Paulette Goddard, Jackie O, Veronica Lake,

Onassis, Jacqueline Kennedy. Had a "world-class spending fetish."Linked with Warren Beatty, Marlon Brando, Pete Hamill, William Holden, JFK, RFK, Ari Onassis, and Frank Sinatra.

O'Neal, Ryan. Prick. Pothead. Physically abusive of his women and children. Linked with Ursula Andress, Jacqueline Bisset, Joan Collins, Britt Ekland, Mia Farrow, Farrah Fawcett, Melanie Griffith, Anjelica Huston, Bianca Jagger, Carole King, Ali MacGraw, Liza Minnelli, Joni Mitchell, Diana Ross, Barbra Streisand, Margaret Trudeau, and Tuesday Weld.

O'Neal, Tatum. Heroin addict. Tried in vain to seduce Michael Jackson. Linked with Alec Baldwin and John McEnroe.

O'Reilly, Bill. Surprisingly unintelligent, for all his bluster. Anti-Muslim bigot.

Ormond, Julia. Cheap. Linked with Gabriel Byrne, Harrison Ford, and Brad Pitt.

Osmond, Marie. No longer a Mormon (good for you, Marie!). Linked with John Schneider.

O'Toole, Peter. Incredibly filthy stage name. Recovering drunkard. Brought up as a girl for the first twelve years of his life. Linked with Ursula Andress and Audrey Hepburn.

Pacino, Al. Face lift. Linked with Jill Clayburgh, Beverly D'Angelo, Diane Keaton, Penelope Ann Miller, Kathleen Quinlan, Tuesday Weld, and Debra Winger.

Palin, Michael. All-around nice guy.

Palmenteri, Chazz. Used a personal assistant for sex (threatened to ruin her career if she didn't), then paid her off (with De Niro's money) so she wouldn't talk.

Paltrow, Gwyneth. "Snotty, pompous, chain-smoking toothpick." Rumored to be evil and back-stabbing to her competitors. Acts like a diva on-set and off. Rumored to have dumped Brad over his heavy pot/X use as well as her snooty attitude towards his lack of education. Reportedly a "favorite" of Harvey and/or Bob Weinstein. Linked with Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Viggo Mortensen, Brad Pitt, Jonathan Schaech, David Schwimmer, Jerry Seinfeld, Mark Wahlberg, and Luke Wilson.

Parker, Dorothy. Drunkard. Played the field with many men, including Robert Benchley. Repeatedly attempted suicide.

Parker, Sarah Jessica. Very superstitious. Has a troubled marriage to Matthew Broderick; reportedly threatened to get pregnant if he didn't marry her. Has made many more enemies than friends on the set of Sex and the City. Has inverted nipples. Linked with Nicholas Cage, Robert Downey Jr, Michael J. Fox, John-John Kennedy, and Chris Penn.

Parton, Dolly. Very easy to work with. Bi______. Good ole gal. Reportedly seduced a 13-year-old boy, which isn't cool.

Patinkin, Mandy. Vain. Unpleasant to work with. Wife-beater.

Patric, Jason. Heroin addict. Linked with Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Julia Roberts, and Christy Turlington.

Pearce, Guy. Pothead.

Peck, Gregory. Nice man, and openly gay-friendly in his 80s. I'd do him. Linked with Ingrid Bergman & Audrey Hepburn.

Peckinpah, Sam. Insane; treated cast and crew horribly.

Penn, Sean. Punches out photographers; needs therapy--badly. Poetaster. Linked with Naomi Campbell, Courtney Cox, Jewel, Elle MacPherson, Madonna (failed marriage), Mary Stuart Masterson, Elizabeth McGovern, Susan Sarandon, and Robin Wright (troubled marriage).

Perkins, Anthony. FOD. Linked with Tab Hunter, Rudolf Nureyev, and Victoria Principal.

Peron, Eva. Linked with Errol Flynn,

Perry, Matthew. Reportedly bulimic; also reportedly a drug/alcohol addict who is not now quite as drug-free as he pretends to be in public. Linked with Hank Azaria, Yasmine Bleeth, Neve Campbell, Jennifer Capriati, Shannon Doherty, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Selma Hayek, Elizabeth Hurley, Amanda Peet, Julia Roberts, and Jamie Tarses.

Peters, Bernadette. Swings her legs on both sides of the fence.

Petty, Tom. Very cool guy, very good to those who work for him and drive him.

Pfeiffer, Michelle. Reportedly was a high-priced call-girl at one time. Linked with Eric Clapton, Kevin Costner, Harrison Ford, Michael Keaton, David E. Kelley, Val Kilmer, John Malkovich, Fisher Stevens and Kiefer Sutherland.

Phillippe, Ryan. Used to be gay for pay. Linked with Reese Witherspoon via marriage; she reportedly does not treat him well, and he returns the favor by chasing other women.

Phillips, Bijou. "She is out of control--a beast. She chews with her mouth open and has no manners." Cocaine abuser, and publically so. Linked with Evan Dando and Leonardo DiCaprio.

Phillips, Emo. "Was NOT playing a character in his act, is REALLY like that all the time. Formerly? married to Judy Tenuta, despite her trying to hide that fact. Oh, and also liked exposing himself to children."

Phillips, Lou Diamond. Wife left him for Melissa Etheridge; reports on how he took this differ.

Phillips, Mackenzie. Recovering drug user. Possible L______. Linked with Mick Jagger.

Phillips, Michelle. Drug user. Linked with Warren Beatty, Dennis Hopper, Jack Nicholson, Rudolf Nureyev, and Roman Polanski.

Phoenix, Joaquin. Coke user. Bad driver. Linked with Susanna Eng.

Phoenix, River. Drug addict; died of overdose. Played from both sides of the plate. Horrible family. Linked with Samantha Mathis and Martha Plimpton.

Piaf, Edith. Drunk and drug addict. Bisexual. Linked with Jean Cocteau, Marlene Dietrich, John Garfield, and Yves Montand.

Piazza, Mike. Has a taste for Latin men.

Pierce, David Hyde. FOD.

Pink. Bi______ with a taste for black men. Recovering heroin addict.

Pinkett, Jada. Either Will Smith is really the type to cheat on her if she isn't watching him all day, every day, or she's paranoid. (You make the call.) Linked with Grant Hill. Married to Will Smith.

Pitt, Brad. Hygienically challenged. Hard to work with; was horrible on the set of Devil's Own. Used to wear a chicken suit for El Pollo Loco. Reportedly broke up with Gwyneth Paltrow over her refusal to service him orally. Reported heavy drug use. Plays both sides of the field. Has herpes. Has wandering eyes (and other body parts). Was arrested in 1989 for exposing himself to drivers in Malibu. Linked with Jennifer Anniston, Nicole Appleton, Geena Davis, Robin Givens, Juliette Lewis (while she was only 16), Robin Givens, Demi Moore, Julia Ormond, and Uma Thurman.

Poitier, Sydney. Dignified man; too cool for words. Linked with Diahanne Carroll.

Polanski, Roman. Enjoys favors of young women--very young women. (Read: teenage girls). Statutory rapist. Difficult to work with. Linked with Catherine Deneuve, Mia Farrow, Nastassja Kinski, Michelle Phillips, and Sharon Tate.

Pop, Iggy. Bisexual. Recovering drug addict. Exhibitionist.

Pope Paul VI. Wasn't just a Pope; was also a Queen.

Pope Pius XII. Morally vile; anti-Semite who deserves as much moral condemnation as it is possible to give for his contemptible and inexcusable actions before and during WW2, when he could have helped the Jews of Europe but did not. Is, if there's any justice, burning in Hell as I type this.

Porter, Cole. FOD.

Portman, Natalie. Has admitted to lusting after other woman, but claims never to have done anything about it. (No, certainly not.) Is succesfully living the life of an ordinary college student; in person, very modest and unassuming. Linked with Hayden Christiansen, Lukas Haas, and Moby.

Posey, Parker. Bright woman. Linked with Jimmy Fallon and Marilyn Manson. (oh, Parker, say it ain't so!)

Poundstone, Paula. L_____; claims to be asexual and celibate. Possible child molester, although the charges were dropped.

Powell, William. Linked with Kay Francis, Jean Harlow, Carole Lombard and Myrna Loy.

Power, Tyrone. Played both sides of the fence. Rumored to have held scat parties with Cesar Romero and Monty Wooley. Linked with Mr. Blackwell, Truman Capote, Joan Crawford, Doris Day, Errol Flynn, Eva Gabor, Judy Garland, Rita Hayworth, Howard Hughes, Cesar Romero, Eva Peron, Simone Simon, Gene Tierney, Lana Turner and Loretta Young.

Powers, Stefanie. Sexually harassed her young assistant. Linked with Timothy Dalton, Eddie Fisher, William Holden (who beat her), David Janssen, Gary Lockwood, and Robert Wagner.

Presley, Elvis. Slut. Pill-popper. Was once blackmailed because someone had a film of Elvis with five women--at once. Didn't like to perform oral sex, but sure liked receiving it. Linked with Ursula Andress, Ann-Margret, Doris Duke, Shelley Fabares, Angela Lansbury, Juliet Prowse, Cybil Shepherd, Nancy Sinatra, Barbara Stanwyck,Barbra Streisand, Mamie Van Doren, Tuesday Weld and Natalie Wood.

Presley, Lisa Marie. $cientologist. Weird-*** relationship with Michael Jackson. Linked with Nicholas Cage and Jeff Goldblum.

Presley, Priscilla. $cientologist.

Preston, Kelly. Married to John Travolta. $cientologist. Formerly with George Clooney, Kevin Costner, Luke Perry, and Charlie Sheen.

Price, Vincent. Gay; his wife was a L______.

Priestly, Jason. "Rumored to have gotten a major part bent over a producer's desk." Drug user. FOD.

Prince. Long string of failed relationships (Apollonia, Kim Basinger, Sheena Easton, Carmen Electra, Sherilyn Fenn, Susanna Hoffs, Madonna, Sinead O'Connor, and Vanity), and now fallen on economic hard times. Divorcing his wife. Abuser of women.

Prince Edward. FOD.

Prince George. Queen's Consort. FOD.

Principal, Victoria. Used casting couch to get into the profession. Had affair with Andy Gibb, Anthony Perkins, and Frank Sinatra.

Prinze, Jr., Freddie. Bi______. Linked with Sarah Michelle Gellar.

Prowse, Juliet. Linked with John Holmes and Elvis Presley.

Puente, Tito. 40-year-long cocaine habit. (Oh, Tito, what were you thinking...?)

Quaid, Dennis. Recovering alcohol & drug addict. Has a certain difficulty with that whole "faithfulness" concept. Linked with Andie MacDowell and Meg Ryan.

Queen Latifah. L______.

Quinn, Anthony. Slut; generally good-natured. Physically abusive towards women, though. Linked with Ingrid Bergman, Rita Hayworth, Carole Lombard, Mae West and Shelley Winters.

Raft, George. Ties to organized crime. Linked with Lucille Ball, Marlene Dietrich, Carole Lombard, Norma Shearer, and Mae West.

Ramone, Joey. Down-to-earth personality. Hygienically challenged.

Rather, Dan. Difficult to work with. Conceited.

Reagan, Nancy Davis. The eminence grise(ly) in the Reagan White House. Used astrology to determine policy decisions. Slept with Frank Sinatra in the White House itself. Personally pro-choice but kept quiet and supported anti-choice actions for her husband's career. Former "Hostess Girl"/prostitute for the studios when they needed to recruit someone; reported to give the best head in Hollywood, in her day. Was pregnant when she married Ronnie. Linked with Milton Berle, Yul Brynner, Clark Gable, Peter Lawford, Frank Sinatra, Spencer Tracy, and Mike Wallace.

Reagan, Ronald. "I have never seen one man more pussy-whipped by his wife in my life." Absent-minded, evil-by-omission man. Betrayed his fellow Hollywood stars to red-baiters. Homophobe and racist. Rapist of Selene Walters during the 1950s. Symbol and figurehead of almost all that was wrong with the 1980s. Linked with Doris Day, Nancy Davis Reagan, and Jane Wyman.

Redford, Robert. Recovering alcoholic. Formerly with Kim Basinger, Sonia Braga, Jane Fonda, and Babs Streisand.

Reece, Gabrielle. Linked with Dean Cain and Tiger Woods.

Reed, Lou. Rumored bisexual & serial dater of transsexuals. Drug addict. Linked to Laurie Anderson & Suzanne Vega.

Reed, Rex. FOD. Shoplifter.

Reeves, Keanu. May be a FOD, although there are many conflicting reports on this. Hygienically challenged. Never graduated from high school. Supposed drug use. No one home upstairs, but it's a hell of a climb up the staircase. In person, a nice, sweet, unassuming guy. Linked with David Geffen, Carrie-Anne Moss, and Michael Stipe.

Reid, Tara. Coke (and pot, and heroin, and everything else) user, snob, bad tipper. Into group sex. Linked with Tom Brady, Carson Daly (oh, yuch), Heath Ledger, Ashton Kutcher, and David Schwimmer.

Reilly, Charles Nelson. Openly gay.

Reiner, Rob. Limping by on massive daily doses of antidepressants. Formerly married to Penny Marshall.

Reitman, Ivan. Unpleasant person. Homophobe.

Reno, Janet. If rumors are to be believed, a part-time dominatrix. Reportedly a repeat DWI offender who was never arrested because of her power. Linked with Donna Shalala.

Reynolds, Burt. Failed marriage to and bitter divorce with Loni Anderson; linked with Kim Basinger, Candice Bergen, Judy Carne (who he married), Faye Dunaway, Chris Evert, Farrah Fawcett, Sally Field, Hal Needham, Cybill Shepherd, Dinah Shore, Mamie Van Doren and Tammy Wynette. Now on very hard economic times; reportedly almost homeless. Abuser of women.

Reynolds, Debbie. L____/bisexual with a taste for leather & the lash. Not a particularly good mother to Carrie Fisher. Drunkard. Married to Eddie Fisher. Linked with Doris Day, Glenn Ford, Agnes Moorehead, and Robert Wagner.

Ricci, Christina. Recovering anorexic; formerly burned herself with cigarettes. Linked with Johnny Depp and Moby.

Rice, Anne. Bad writer, bad dresser, bad neighbor, bad person.

Richards, Denise. The light's on in the attic, and it's a hell of a view, but nobody's home. Breast implants. Clean freak/germphobic. Former Heidi Fleiss worker. Linked with Patrick Muldoon, Charlie Sheen, and John Stamos.

Richards, Keith. Heavy (former?) drug user. Zombie/undead. Linked with Mick Jagger in a Portrait-of-Dorian-Grey fashion.

Richert, Nate. FOD.

Richie, Lionel. Hit his wife (although it was when he'd discovered her in bed with another man).

Rivera, Geraldo. Was born 'Jerry Rivers.' Thinks a little too highly of himself. Switch-hitter. Linked (by his own account, at least) with Judy Collins, Chris Evert (no, Chris, say it ain't so!), Bette Midler, Liza Minnelli, and suppposedly a thousand others. (I suspect stat padding.)

Rivers, Joan. Curiously humorless; vain, as well. No stranger to the plastic surgeon's knife. Apologist for Reagan et al. Warped relationship with her daughter. Cheap and stingy. In her attempts to be funny she has turned into a crass, vulgar shrieking harridan.

Robbins, Tim. Boy-toy of Susan Sarandon. Pothead.

Roberts, Eric. Oddball, perhaps because of drugs. Abuser of women. Linked with Sandy Dennis.

Roberts, Julia. Has well-earned reputation for falling in love with, and just as quickly dumping, her costars. Drunkard and drug user. Difficult to work with. Very difficult to work for and drive. Plays both sides of the field. Size queen and likes that back-door loving. Linked with Ben Bratt, George Clooney (who she cheated on Ben Bratt with--and who among us would not?), Daniel Day Lewis, Richard Gere, Ethan Hawke, Lyle Lovett (who she married, then divorced, thereby breaking the poor boy's heart), Dylan McDermott, Liam Neeson, Jason Patric, Matthew Perry, Kiefer Sutherland (who she left on the eve of their wedding), and Bruce Willis.

Roberts, Tanya. Alcoholic, which was the reason for her leaving/being fired from That 70s Show.

Robinson, Smoky. Has a crack habit and is a slut.

Roddenberry, Gene. Unpleasant martinet; repeatedly cheated on his wife, who deserved much better. Slept with Nichelle Nichols.

Rodman, Dennis. Crossdresser. Semi-closeted bisexual, or perhaps just confused. Reported alien. Rapist. Linked with Carmen Electra and Madonna.

Rogan, Joe. Asshole. Needs repeated beatings before he's fit to rejoin the human race.

Rogers, Ginger. Linked with Desi Arnaz, Fred Astaire, Lew Ayres, George Gershwin, Cary Grant, Howard Hughes, Leo McCarey, Burgess Meredith, David Niven, Jimmy Stewart and Rudy Vallee.

Rogers, Kenny. Openly admits to enjoying using 1-900 numbers & being talked dirty to. (Points for honesty, anyhow.)

Rogers, Mimi. $cientologist (or perhaps ex-$cientologist, according to some). Linked with Tom Cruise.

Romano, Ray. Gambling addict.

Romero, Cesar. FOD. Rumored to have held scat parties with Tyrone Power and Monty Wooley. Linked with Desi Arnaz and Tyrone Power.

Ronstadt, Linda. Linked with Jerry Brown, Mick Jagger, Kevin Kline, and George Lucas.

Rooney, Mickey. Conceited. Born-again Christian. Claims to have sodomized Elizabeth Taylor. Links to Ava Gardner, Marilyn Monroe, Norma Shearer, Gene Tierney, and Lana Turner.

Roosevelt, Eleanor. Bi______.

Roosevelt, Franklin Delano. Had long time affair with a woman not his wife.

Roseanne. Deeply disturbed woman. Never graduated from high school. String of failed marriages/relationships. Former prostitute; has had L____ affairs in the past. Has claimed to suffer from MPD. Domineering towards her cast and crew. Formerly married to Tom Arnold.

Rose-Marie (from The Dick Van Dyke Show). L______.

Ross, Diana. Conceited freak. Humorless jerk. Has admitted to having same-sex relationships. Linked with Warren Beatty, Richard Gere, Berry Gordy, Julio Iglesias, Michael Jackson, Ryan O'Neal, Smokey Robinson, and Gene Simmons.

Rossellini, Isabella. Refreshingly modest woman. Daughter of Ingrid Bergman. Linked with Mikhail Baryshnikov, David Lynch, Gary Oldman and Martin Scorsese.

Rossdale, Gavin. Closet queen. Pothead. Linked with Gwen Stefani.

Roth, David Lee. Closeted FOD.

Rourke, Mickey. "Kissing him is like kissing an ashtray." Arrogant, egotistical, hygienically challenged punk. Vocally pro-IRA. Difficult to work with. Abuser of women. Victim of a horrendous, failed face-lift. Linked with Kim Basinger, Darryl Hannah, and Carre Otis.

Rubiroso, Porfirio. Liar and slut. Linked with Dolores Del Rio, Doris Duke, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Veronica Lake, Jayne Mansfield, Marilyn Monroe, Kim Novak, and Eva Peron.

Russell, Keri. Reportedly very nice and professional. Linked with Scott Speedman.

Russell, Kurt. Humorless and conceited. Compulsively cheats on POSSLQ Goldie Hawn.

Ryan, Meg. Difficult to work with: "The biggest ***** (the Against the Ropes cast) have ever worked with in their careers!" Linked with Craig Bierko, Russell Crowe, Anthony Edwards, Melissa Etheridge & Dennis Quaid.

Ryder, Winona. Hopping from musician to actor to musician with all the agility and speed of a starved hyena targeting a limping Thompson's gazelle. One of her well-earned Hollywood nicknames is "Wanna Ride Her?" Rumored to enjoy pleasuring herself far more than she enjoys or is capable of being pleased by her boyfriends. Has a crudely, stereotypically masculine approach to sex. Pothead. Shoplifter. Broke up with Damon because he convinced her to make a bad set of investments, and she lost over $1 million. Has done good work with her community, though. Bi______. Linked with Ryan Adams, Dodi al Fayeed, Beck, Bono, Ed Burns, George Clooney, Matt Damon, Evan Dando, Daniel Day-Lewis, Johnny Depp, Robert Downey Jr., David Duchovny, Adam Duritz, Jakob Dylan, Everlast, Jimmy Fallon, Dave Grohl, Corey Haim, Chris Isaak, Courtney Love, Brittany Murphy, Chris Noth, Dave Pirner, Charlie Sheen, Christian Slater, Mark Wahlberg, Paul Westerberg, Bruce Willis, and Pete Yorn.

Sabato, Jr., Antonio. Bi______. Nice guy.

Saget, Bob. Vain; needs to be slapped, several times & hard.

Salenger, Meredith. Enjoyed the best the Harvard water polo team (men's) had to offer while at Harvard.

Sambora, Richie. Cokehead. Married to Heather Locklear. Linked with Cher, Courtney Cox, and Ally Sheedy.

Sampras, Pete. Pleasant but dull. Linked with Lauren Holly, Kimberly Williams and Bridgette Wilson.

Sanders, George. My idol. Linked with Lucille Ball, Dolores Del Rio, Doris Duke, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Hedy Lamarr, Marilyn Monroe, and Gene Tierney.

Sarandon, Susan. Treats her staff badly, and in public, no less. Linked with Barry Bostwick (who slapped her around) Louis Malle, Tim Robbins (current thing) and Sean Penn.

Sargent, Dick. FOD.

Sawyer, Diane. Contemptible woman. Linked with Warren Beatty; married (beard duty) to Mike Nichols.

Sacchi, Greta. Imperious towards her personal staff. Linked with Vincent d'Onofrio and Daniel Day Lewis.

Schaech, Jonathan. Closeted FOD. Linked with Christina Applegate and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Schiffer, Claudia. Three sandwiches short of a picnic basket. Linked to Prince Albert & David Copperfield (on beard patrol).

Schlessinger, Dr. Laura. Even worse than she appears. “Aggressive, hypersensitive, bossy, condescending, huge on the ego and skimpy on the tip.” Hypocritical and insufferable moralist prig of the worst order. Simply one of the most vile human beings on the face of the planet, and an embarassment to humanity.

Schneider, Fred. FOD.

Schneider, Maria. Bi______.

Schroeder, Rick. Drug abuser and heavy partier.

Schwarzenegger, Arnold. Unpleasant, vain conservative. Has a Nazi father. Apologist for Kurt Waldheim. Steroid use early in his weightlifting career, as well as nude pictures (and possibly more, as a kept man) done for gay men. Troubled marriage to Maria Shriver. Customer with Heidi Fleiss. Reportedly required a penile implant due to the steroids he took/takes. Given to groping women. Linked to Vanessa Williams.

Schwimmer, David. Linked to Minnie Driver, Gwyneth Paltrow, Tara Reid, and Audrey Tatou.

Scott, George C. Linked with and physically abused Ava Gardner.

Scott, Randolph. Closet case. Linked with Mr. Blackwell, Cary Grant, Howard Hughes, and Lupe Velez.

Seagal, Steven. Deserves to be beaten. Repeatedly. Jerk. Vain. Failed marriage with Kelly LeBrock, who he mistreated. Sexual harasser.

Seger, Bob. Booze-bag, drug abuser, musical hack, beater of women, and repeat DUI offender.

Seinfeld, Jerry. Comedian who is humorless about his penchant for young/under-age women. Former $cientologist. Linked with Tawny Kitaen and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Selleck, Tom. Open conservativism + closet queen = hypocrisy.

Sellers, Peter. Difficult to work with. Unpleasant personality. Married to Britt Ekland. Linked with Mia Farrow, Sophia Loren, and Liza Minnelli.

Sennett, Mack. FOD.

Seymour, Jane. Reportedly demands the highest degree of pampering from movie & tv show producers.

Seymour, Stephanie. Had collagen injected into her lips; supposedly a recent plane ride made them explode. Linked with Warren Beatty, Steve Martin, and Axl Rose (who beat her).

Shaffer, Paul. FOD. (Or perhaps not. Accounts differ.)

Shakira. Diva.

Sharif, Omar. Sexy man. Compulsive gambler. Linked with Ingrid Bergman, Dyan Cannon, Julie Christie, Catherine Deneuve, Ava Gardner, Sophia Loren, and Barbra Streisand.

Shatner, William. Bi______. Depending on who you talk to, either a humorless martinet and control freak or a charmingly conceited man. Seems to have become more of the latter and less of the former in recent years. Alcoholic.

Shearer, Norma. "Hot-blooded." Clark Gable, John Gilbert, Howard Hughes, JFK, Burgess Meredith, David Niven, George Raft, Mickey Rooney, Jimmy Stewart and Irving Thalberg.

Sheedy, Ally. Former bulimic, recovering drunk/drug addict. Poetaster. Linked with Woody Harrelson, Rob Lowe, Demi Moore, Richie Sambora, and Eric Stoltz.

Sheen, Charlie. Claims to be a born-again Christian; former (and possibly current) regular at Hollywood brothels and with Hollywood prostitutes. Never graduated from high school. Really bad poet. Treats his women badly. Drug user/abuser. Linked with Corey Haim (?!), Ginger Lynn, Kelly Preston, Denise Richards, and Winona Ryder.

Sheila E. L______.

Shepherd, Cybil. Difficult to work with. A fun-lovin' gal while younger; engaged in a three-way at least once. Linked with Gloria Allred, Peter Bogdanovich, Jeff Bridges, Charles Grodin, Don Johnson, Larry McMurtry, Elvis Presley, Burt Reynolds, and Bruce Willis.

Shields, Brooke. Bi______. Bizarre and currently fractured relationship with her domineering mother. Claimed virginity long past anyone thought it likely or possible, especially those at Princeton who knew of her relationship with Dean Cain. Was paid by Michael Jackson and George Michael to act the beard for them. A harridan for a mother. Very friendly and polite in person. Also linked with Andre Agassi, Prince Albert of Monaco, Dodi al Fayeed, Woody Harrelson, John-John Kennedy, George Michael (beard duty), Liam Neeson, David Strickland, and John Travolta.

Shore, Pauly. Really is as stupid as he appears to be. Customer at Heidi Fleiss' brothel.

Shue, Andrew. Linked with Courtney Thorne Smith.

Shue, Elizabeth. Hygienically challenged. Has begun acting increasingly erratic. Linked with Val Kilmer. Posed/poses for naughty pictures.

Siegfried and Roy. Semi-closeted FODs. Poor tippers.

Silverstone, Alicia. Insecure. Pothead. Rumored to be L____. Linked with Brendan Fraser and Adam Sandler (oy, Alicia...).

Simmons, Gene. Drug user/abuser, although this seems to be disputed. Slut; has nude pictures of over 1000 of his conquests. Good businessman. Linked with Cher, Liza Minnelli, Diana Ross, and Shannon Tweed.

Simmons, Richard. So far out he's on the other side. Stalker of Babs Streisand. Unrequited crush on David Letterman.

Simmons, Russell. Swinger.

Simon, Carly. Linked with Warren Beatty, Mick Jagger, Kris Kristofferson, and James Taylor (who she is back together with)

Simon, Paul. Humorless personality. Failed marriage to Carrie Fisher. Currently married to Edie Brickell. Linked with Shelley Duvall.

Simpson, Orenthal James (OJ). Murdered his ex-wife and her bedmate-of-the-evening; bold-facedly lies about it. Either delusional or sociopathic. Anti-Semitic. Linked with Maude Adams and Tawny Kitaen.

Sinatra, Frank. Misogynist. Never graduated from high school. Pals with organized crime figures and made men; used his mob connections to get his role in From Here To Eternity. Mistreater of countless woman. Pimped for JFK & RFK. Marriages/affairs to Lauren Bacall, Jacqueline Bisset, Doris Day, Angie Dickinson, Marlene Dietrich, Patty Duke, Mia Farrow, Eva and Zsa Zsa Gabor, Ava Gardner, Judy Garland, Merv Griffin, Grace Kelly, Shirley Maclaine, Marilyn Monroe, Kim Novak, Jackie O, Victoria Principal, Nancy Reagan (while in the White House, no less), Jill St. John, Elizabeth Taylor, Lana Turner, Gloria Vanderbilt, Tuesday Weld and Natalie Wood.

Singleton, John. Physically abused his wife. Slut. Slept with every extra he could lay his hands on at the set of Shaft.Linked with Tyra Banks.

Sinise, Gary. Former drug user.

Sizemore, Tom. Wife-beater. Recovering heroin addict. Linked with (did not cheat on his wife with) Elizabeth Hurley and Heidi Fleiss.

Skye, Ione. Claims to have become a lesbian after divorcing Adam Horowitz. Linked with Jenni Shimizu.

Slater, Christian. Recovering and seemingly current alcoholic and drug user. Abuser of women. Linked with Christina Applegate, Patricia Arquette, Courtney Cox, Mary Stuart Masterson, Samantha Mathis, Winona Ryder, and Christy Turlington.

Smith, Anna Nicole, The Widow (TWANS). Never graduated from high school. Former prostitute & stripper; recovering (current?) alcohol & drug addict. Breast implants. Several beers short of a six-pack. Has had l______ affairs. Married an old man to get his money; a spendthrift. Just a sad, pitiful woman. Linked with Robin Leach and Donald Trump.

Smith, Bessie. Bi______.

Smith, Jeff (The Frugal Gourmet). Unpleasant, vain personality; sexual harasser and pederast.

Smith, Liz. L______. Does not write her own column.

Smith, Robert. Notoriously bad in bed.

Smith, Will. No longer refreshingly down-to-earth and unpretentious, his stardom has now gone to his head, and he's turned into a raging, vain asshole. Linked to Jada Pinkett.

Smits, Jimmy. Possible drug abuse or AIDS or both.

Snipes, Wesley. Beat Halle Berry badly enough to make her lose part of her hearing.

Solti, Sir George. "Hung like a horse and a darling of the divas."

Somers, Suzanne. Was victim of horrendous death threats from ABC for asking for more money after first season of Three's Company. Drug abuser.

Sorbo, Kevin. Playing for the home team.

Sorkin, Aaron. Recovering and struggling drug addict. (Of course, that's divine punishment for his abandoning Sports Night like he did.)

Sorvino, Mira. Reportedly difficult to work with. Refused to act alongside Ellen DeGeneres because she's afraid of somehow being linked with Ellen in the public's eye. Linked with Kevin Costner, Willem Dafoe, Val Kilmer, John Leguizamo, & Quentin Tarantino.

Soul, David. Wife-beater and necrophiliac. (so the rumor goes, anyhow)

Spacey, Kevin. Way back in the closet--behind your old sneakers--that's where Kevin's hiding. Linked with Rupert Graves, Helen Hunt, Bebe Neuwirth, and Bryan Singer.

Spade, David. Highly neurotic and self-involved; filled with schadenfreude and ill-will for other comics.

Spears, Britney. Very stingy (although I'm hearing reports that this is not always true). Breast implants. Has been known to enjoy marijuana on occasion. Chain-smoker. Has let her fame go to her head and become a beeyotch. Per Justin Timberlake, her mouth was deflowered a long time before the rest of her body was; Justin dumped her once he was told--by Christina Aguilera, no less, if my source is to be believed--that she was shtupping their shared choreographer. Also linked with Nick Carter, Jeff Gordon and Marcus Schenkenberg. (Gads, what horrible taste in men! Not a brain cell among them.)

Spelling, Tori. Hilariously bad actress using her father's money to buy herself a new nose, breasts and career. Sexually linked with her brother (yuch--that's so nasty on so many levels). Linked with Jean-Claude van Damme.

Spiner, Brent. Reportedly linked with Marina Sirts, Gates McFadden, and numerous others. Also reportedly a very closeted Friend of Dorothy. Generally very nice and friendly to everyone.

Springfield, Rick. Physically abused his wife.

Stallone, Frank. $cientologist.

Stallone, Sly. Underendowed, and has a taste for prostitutes. Hard to work with. Crudely hit on and was humiliatingly dissed by Uma Thurman. Once dumped his wife via Fed-Ex. Starred in soft-core porn film. Has a bad bed-side manner. His hired help are not allowed to look at him during his parties. Linked with Pamela Anderson, Naomi Campbell, Janice Dickinson, Farrah Fawcett, Brigitte Nielsen, and Janine Turner.

Stamos, Rebecca Romijn. Bi______. Linked with John Stamos.

Stamp, Terence. Linked with Candice Bergen, Jacqueline Bisset, Julie Christie, and Joan Collins.

Stanwyck, Barbara. Married Robert Taylor in a beard-merkin arrangement. Linked with Jean-Pierre Aumont, Frank Capra, Gary Cooper, Joan Crawford, Marlene Dietrich, Glenn Ford, William Holden, Al Jolson, Elvis Presley, and Robert Wagner.

Steele, Danielle. Linked with George Hamilton.

Steenburgen, Mary. Married to Ted Danson; formerly married to Malcolm McDowell.

Stern, Howard. Reportedly nice guy despite his asshole act and demeanor. Separated from his wife, in part because of his monomaniacal work habits and in part because of his affair with a stripper. Linked with Angie Everhart and Robin Quivers.

Stevens, Connie. Linked with Eddie Fisher and John McCain.

Stevenson, Parker. FOD. Linked with Kirstie Alley.

Stewart, Jimmy. Linked with Olivia De Havilland, Marlene Dietrich, Jean Harlow, Rita Hayworth, Katharine Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Ginger Rogers, Simone Simon and Loretta Young.

Stewart, Kordell. FOD.

Stewart, Martha. Unpleasant personality. Said to have a taste for much younger men. Bisexual. Tax-dodger. Inside trader.

Stewart, Patrick. Reportedly temperamental. Said to pack one of the largest weapons in Hollywood. Hits on everyone in sight. Possible involvement with Whoopi Goldberg.

Stewart, Rod. "The cheapest man in rock and roll." "Swaggering, pineapple-haired string bean." Vain; recovering (current?) heroin addict. Possibly B_______. Was dumped and divorced by Rachel Stewart because he'd turned into a boring old fart. Linked with Britt Ekland, Kelly Emberg, Rachel Hunter, Mick Jagger, Kelly LeBrock, and Joanna Lumley.

Stiller, Ben. "Uptight prick." Linked with Janeane Garofalo, Christine Taylor, and Jeanne Tripplehorn.

Sting. "Humorless prat." Hygienically challenged. Nice man. Good tipper.

Stipe, Michael. Massive cokehead. Rumored to prefer the company of gentlemen, and is now admitting it. Hygienically challenged. Reportedly linked with Helena Christensen, Toni Collette, Natalie Merchant, River Phoenix, and Keanu Reeves.

Stoltz, Eric. Jerk. Linked with Cher, Susanna Eng, Bridget Fonda, Laura Linney (he helped break up her marriage), and Ally Sheedy.

Stone, Oliver. Disingenuous drug fiend and alcoholic. Vain. Closet case. Regular at certain Hollywood brothels. Arrested for DUI. Has a thing for Asian women.

Stone, Sharon. Unpleasant personality--over-full of herself. Steals quotes and does not give attribution; steals jewelry and does not return it. Given to quickly selecting and then rejecting men, based on what they can do for her and what & how much they can buy her. Difficult to work with. Has had a tendency to tv shop for her one night stands--sees them on tv, rents a room, and then has her selections told to meet her there. Poor tipper. Breast implants. Dope smoker. Power-obsessed. Used the casting couch to get roles and her way on the set. Linked with Prince Albert of Monaco, Russell Crowe, Dwight Yoakum and Dweezil Zappa; reportedly nailed Bill Clinton on election night.

Stowe, Madeleine. Married to Brian Benben.

Streep, Meryl. Linked with Ed Begley, Jr, Kevin Kline, and Jack Nicholson.

Streisand, Barbara. "Everything she sings is charged with self-loving vulgarity." Vain & egotistical harridan; legendary for being difficult to work with--perhaps the worst such in the history of Hollywood. Grotesquely bad taste in interior decorating. Notorious tightwad despite her wealth. Had a videotape of her having sex with two-bit actor James Brolin stolen from her house. Affairs with Andre Agassi, Warren Beatty, James Brolin, Richard Burton, Gary Busey, Bill Clinton,Clint Eastwood, Sam Elliott, Milos Forman, Richard Gere, Elliott Gould, Peter Jennings, Don Johnson, Kris Kristofferson, George Lucas, Liam Neeson, Ryan O'Neal, Elvis Presley, Robert Redford, Omar Sharif, Tommy Smothers, Pierre Trudeau and Peter Weller.

Sutherland, Kiefer. Linked with Sherilyn Fenn, Michelle Pfeiffer & Julia Roberts.

Swank, Hilary. $cientologist.

Swanson, Gloria. Linked with Wallace Beery, Joe Kennedy, Sr., and Ari Onassis.

Swanson, Kristi. Linked with David Spade. DUI.

Swayze, Patrick. $cientologist. FOD. Alcohol problem.

Tarantino, Quentin. Egotistical and unpleasant (although reportedly quite good at oral sex). Never graduated from high school. Crudely hits on many, many women. Linked with Margaret Cho (who says he's great in bed) and Mira Sorvino (who QT didn't treat well).

Taylor, Elizabeth. Abused by her father (not sexually) as a child. Drug addict. Helped to ruin Richard Burton. Ambiguous/weird relationship with Michael Jackson. Linked with Carl Bernstein, Montgomery Clift, Eddie Fisher, Malcom Forbes, George Hamilton, Rock Hudson, Peter Lawford, Victor Mature, Mickey Rooney, Frank Sinatra, and Rod Steiger.

Taylor, Lawrence. Cokehead.

Tesh, John. Vacant, vain talking head; talentless "musician." Germ-crazy.

Theron, Charlize. Enjoys "adult toys" and ganja. Linked to George Clooney and Dwight Yoakum.

Thicke, Alan. Pothead.

Thomas, Derrick. Cokehead.

Thomas, Jonathan Taylor. FOD.

Thomas, Philip Michael. Difficult to work with. Conceited. Wife-beater.

Thompson, Emma. Graceful ex-wife to Kenneth Branagh. Formerly linked with Anthony Hopkins & Jonathan Pryce. For some years she tested Stephen Fry's celibate gay status by parading naked in front of him.

Thompson, Fred. Jerk.

Thorne Smith, Courtney. Linked with Andrew Shue.

Thornton, Billy Bob. Dumped his wife (who he abused both physically and emotionally) like a load of three-day-old shrimp once he got famous. Recovering anorexic. (There are conflicting accounts as to who is to blame for Thornton's divorce of his first wife; either he is physically and emotionally abusive or she is a violent psychopath and habitual liar) Drug user. Has a pathological fear of antiques and dirty silverware. Linked with Laura Dern and Angelina Jolie.

Thurman, Uma. Never graduated from high school. Cokehead and alcoholic. Has enjoyed the favors of a number of men--a large number. Linked with Nicholas Cage, John Cusack, Robert De Niro, Robert Downey Jr, Richard Gere, Ethan Hawke (whose baby she bore), Timothy Hutton, Mick Jagger, Don Johnson, Judd Nelson, Gary Oldman (failed marriage), Brad Pitt, Sam Shepard,and Donnie Wahlberg.

Tiegs, Cheryl. Face lift.

Tilly, Jennifer. Very nice person.

Timberlake, Justin. A mental lightweight. Linked with Christina Aguilera, Janet Jackson, Alyssa Milano, and Britney Spears.

Tomlin, Lily. Hollywood's most openly Closeted L_____, although she has now admitted it, openly, in at least one interview.

Tracy, Spencer. Long-running affair with Katharine Hepburn while he was married; Catholic hypocrite who wouldn't divorce his wife during his affairs. Difficult to work with. Alcoholic. Linked with Ingrid Bergman, Joan Crawford, Judy Garland, Paulette Goddard, Grace Kelly, Nancy Davis Reagan, Gene Tierney and Loretta Young.

Travis, Randy. FOD.

Travolta, John. Reportedly a nice man, but $cientologist and disingenuous about it. Reportedly a closet queen. Never graduated from high school. Difficult to work with. Linked with Richard Gere, Marilu Henner, Hugh Jackman (well, if so, John's got good taste in men, at least.) Olivia Newton-John, Kelly Preston (his wife and fellow $cientologist), Brooke Shields, and Debra Winger.

Trump, Donald. Focus of evil in the modern world. Embodies much that is wrong with America. Short-fingered vulgarian. Linked with TWANS.

Trump, Ivanka (daughter). Bulemic.

Tucker, Tanya. Recovering/current drug and/or alcohol addict. Linked with Glen Campbell.

Turner, Janine. Reportedly anorexic. Reportedly can be had as a kept woman for the right (high) price. A germophobe. Conservative Bush supporter. Formerly with Sly Stallone, Mikhail Baryshnikov, Troy Aikman, Mark Grace, Alec Baldwin. Currently with the son of Jerry Jones, Jr.

Turner, Kathleen. Drinking problem; may have fallen off the wagon, which is a shame if true.

Turner, Lana. Good mother; helped get her daughter off for the killing of Lana's mob-connected boyfriend. Linked with Desi Arnaz, Leonard Bernstein, Richard Burton, Sean Connery, Tommy Dorsey, Kirk Douglas, Errol Flynn, Clark Gable, Ava Gardner, John Garfield, Howard Hughes, Fernando Lamas, Peter Lawford, Dean Martin, Victor Mature, Tyrone Power, Mickey Rooney, Artie Shaw, Frank Sinatra, Robert Taylor, Mel Torme and Robert Wagner.

Twain, Shania. Nasty personality. Former kept woman.

Tyler, Liv. Emphatically enjoying her youth with nearly any cute boy or man within reach. Linked with Evan Dando, Joaquin Phoenix, and Bruce Willis.

Tyler, Stephen. Recovering drug addict; penchant for oral sex (giving) has led to std on his tongue and throat. Throws tantrums backstage if caterer screws up.

Tyson, Mike. A good argument for retroactive abortion. Abuser of women and rapist. Failed marriage to Robin Givens. Linked with Naomi Campbell and Robin Givens.

Ullman, Liv. Linked with Warren Beatty, Ingmar Bergman, Jerry Brown, and Henry Kissinger.

Usher. Diva.

Valentino, Rudolf. "Hung like a cricket." Bisexual. Linked with Marion Davies and Pola Negri.

Van Damme, Jean Claude. Hygienically challenged. Vain. Drug addict and alcoholic. FOD. Hard to work with. Wife beater. "A cheap bully." Linked with Jewel and Tori Spelling.

Van Der Beek, James. Former escort. Closet case. One of his recent birthday presents was John Wesley Shipp's favors. Also linked with Katie Holmes.

Van Doren, Mamie. Good old girl. Linked with Warren Beatty, Johnny Carson, Dick Contino, Tony Curtis, Eddie Fisher, Rock Hudson, Tom Jones, Steve McQueen, Joe Namath, Jack Palance, Elvis Presley, and Burt Reynolds.

Vandross, Luther. FOD.

Van Johnson. FOD.

Van Morrison. "What a talent. What a singer. What a songwriter. What a pain in the ****."

Van Susteren, Greta. Vain. Dull. $cientologist.

Vaughn, Vince. Has a problem with the bottle. FOD. Linked with Anne Heche.

Veidt, Conrad. Bisexual. Former transvestite and cocaine user.

Velez, Lupe. Former prostititute. Nymphomaniac. Committed suicide via choking on an overdose of pills. Linked with Charlie Chaplin, Gary Cooper, Jack Dempsey, Douglas Fairbanks Jr, Douglas Fairbanks Sr, Errol Flynn, Clark Gable, John Gilbert, Jack Johnson, Bert Lahr, Clayton Moore, Erich Maria Remarque, Edward G. Robinson, Randolph Scott, and Johnny Weissmuller.

Vidal, Gore. FOD, and not secret about it. Nailed Jack Kerouac.

Vigoda, Abe. The demi-urge.

Villechaize, Herve. Alcoholic. Abuser of women.

Wagner, Jack. FOD

Wagner, Robert. Possible early same-sex affair with Clifton Webb. Linked with Joan Collins, Stefanie Powers, Debbie Reynolds, Jill St. John, Barbara Stanwyck, Lana Turner, and Natalie Wood.

Wahlberg, Mark. Cokehead and booze-bag. Enjoys exposing himself in public places. Linked with Jordana Brewster, Gwyneth Paltrow, Winona Ryder & Uma Thurman.

Walker, Alice. Playing both sides of the field. Linked with Tracy Chapman.

Walters, Barbara. "Unpleasant, foul-mouthed, stingy." Self-centered, abusive towards her staff, and cheap. No sense of humor, and hates being teased about "Baba Wawa."

Ward, Sela. Linked with Richard Dean Anderson and Peter Weller.

Warhol, Andy. FOD.

Warner, Kurt. (QB of the St. Louis Rams) Anti-Semite.

Warwick, Dionne. Pot smoker.

Washington, Denzel. Faithfulness to his wife is not a concept with which Mr. Washington is a familiar.

Waters, John. FOD. Pope of Bad Taste.

Wayne, John. Conservative; sometimes showed a refreshingly modest outlook & sense of humor, though. Alcoholic. Reported crossdresser. Had a weak spot for Latinas. Racist. Linked with Clara Bow, Joan Crawford, Marlene Dietrich, Paulette Goddard, and Carmen Miranda.

Webb, Jack. Any early (1946) crusader (via his radio show "One Out of Seven") against racial, ethnic, and religious prejudice. Raped Mamie van Doren and possibly other women.

Weinstein, Harvey. Hard to work for.

Weisz, Rachel. Linked with Darren Aronofsky and Sam Mendes.

Welch, Raquel. "Evil to the core." Breast implants and "silicone from the ankles up." Very difficult to work with; prima donna wannabe. Linked with Richard Burton.

Weld, Tuesday. Drunkard and drug abuser. Linked with Raymond Burr, Richard Gere, Dennis Hopper, Gary Lockwood, Sal Mineo, Dudley Moore, Ryan O'Neal, Al Pacino, Elvis Presley, and Frank Sinatra.

Welk, Lawrence. "A real hardass...cruel to the band members and other employees. A regular fascist."

Welles, Orson. Unhappy man who deserved better in life. Didn't treat his women well, though. Possibly the Black Dahlia murderer. Linked with Lucille Ball, Dolores Del Rio, Marlene Dietrich, Judy Garland, Rita Hayworth, Eartha Kitt, Marilyn Monroe, and Gloria Vanderbilt.

West, Mae. Reported to be either a hermaphrodite or a very well-made up transvestite. (Hey, don't look at me like that, I'm not making this stuff up.) Liked daily high colonics. Linked with Max Baer, Gary Cooper, Jack Dempsey, Duke Ellington, Cary Grant, Oscar Hammerstein, Harry Houdini, Jack Johnson, Joe Louis, David Niven, Anthony Quinn, George Raft, and Bugsy Siegel.

White, Vanna. Former kept woman. Intellectually challenged. Has had L_____ affairs. Linked with Corbin Bernsen.

Williams, Barry. Unpleasantly stuck-up over the Brady Bunch, all these years later.

Williams, Billy Dee. Abuser of women.

Williams, Kimberly. Linked with Pete Sampras.

Williams, Robin. Recovering alcoholic & drug addict. Supposedly one of Hollywood's nicest men, although there are conflicting reports on this. Reportedly gave girlfriend VD. Reportedly hygienically challenged. "Borrows" jokes and shtick from other comedians.

Williams, Tennessee. FOD. Alcoholic.

Williams, Vanessa. Linked with Rick Fox, Michael Jordan, and Arnold Schwarzenegger (who she casting couched to get the role in Eraser).

Williamson, Kevin. FOD.

Willis, Bruce. His separation from Demi Moore was extremely bitter. Former bartender and reportedly a former male escort. Rumored to like boys, strippers, and group scenes. Generally vain & unpleasant person. Difficult to work with. Cheapskate. Linked with Lara Flynn Boyle, Milla Jovovich, Julia Roberts, Winona Ryder, and Liv Tyler.

Wilson, Luke. Linked with Drew Barrymore, Lauren Holly, and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Wilson, Owen. Linked with Sheryl Crow and Susanna Eng.

Winfrey, Oprah. Rumored to be a closeted L_____. Has used drugs in the past, but is not (reportedly) a recovering addict. Is very generous to her staff.

Winger, Debra. Difficult to work with. Switch-hitter. Linked with Timothy Hutton, Bob Kerrey, Nick Nolte, Al Pacino, and John Travolta.

Winkler, Henry. "The nicest man in showiz." Germophobe.

Winslet, Kate. Drug use. Linked with Leonardo DiCaprio.

Winters, Shelley. Linked with Marlon Brando, Ronald Colman, Sean Connery, Robert De Niro, Albert Finney, Errol Flynn, Clark Gable, John Garfield, Sterling Hayden, William Holden, Howard Hughes, Burt Lancaster, Anthony Quinn, and Lawrence Tierney.

Wonder, Stevie. Slut. Gave his (now ex-) girlfriend herpes.

Wood, Elijah. A very nice man. FOD, seen with Franka Potente to forestall rumors of his liking men, specifically Dominic Monaghan.

Wood, Natalie. Had trouble remaining faithful to her men. Linked with Warren Beatty, Jerry Brown, Raymond Burr, James Dean, Dennis Hopper, Tab Hunter, Steve McQueen, Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, Robert Wagner, and Christopher Walken.

Woods, James. Vain. Difficult to work with. Abuser of women. Has a taste for multiples. Linked with Heather Graham, Nicollette Sheridan & Sean Young.

Woods, Tiger. Emotionally and mentally immature, for all his skill and composure on the golf course. Cheap and a bad tipper for all his millions. Greedy. Has a thing for gambling, strippers, hookers, and porn. Very rude to the little people. Has a jones for blonde white women.

Wyle, Noah. Closeted FOD, or so the story goes. Also supposed to have a thing for older women.

Xuxa. Hates the kids on her show. Flashed some skin in a movie once, but never did porn. Linked to John-John Kennedy.

Yoakum, Dwight. Hygienically challenged. Emotionally (and possibly physically) abusive towards women. Hard to work with, and throws tantrums if his tea isn't fresh. Linked with Sheryl Crow, Bridget Fonda, Sharon Stone, and Charlize Theron.

Young, Loretta. Sanctimonious goody-goody, but had a child by Clark Gable and claimed she adopted the child.

Young, Robert. Alcoholic.

Young, Sean. Difficult to work with. Pot user.

Zane, Billy. Hard to work with. Switch-hitter. Linked with Kate Moss.

Zappa, Dweezil. Linked with Sandra Bullock & Sharon Stone.

Zellweger, Renee. Linked with Jim Carrey and George Clooney.

Zombie, Rob. A very nice man.



Feuds, Rivalries & Hatreds

Dan Ackroyd vs Woody Allen (Over Soon-yi)

Ben Affleck vs British royalty

Ben Affleck vs P. Diddy (Over Jennifer Lopez. Honestly, fellas, is that the best you can do?)

Ben Affleck vs Rob Schneider (B. said that "Pearl Harbor isn't like a Rob Schneider movie." R. responded, "Well, he's got that right. Mine's intentionally funny.")

Christina Aguilera vs Britney Spears (They just don't like each other. C. doesn't like B.'s teenybopper image, and B. envies C.'s superior talent. Oh, and reportedly C. told Justin Timberlake that B. was cheating on him, leading to the breakup.)

Christina Aguilera vs Eminem (He was nasty about her in a song)

Woody Allen vs Bob Hope (W. decried B’s “laziness” as a performer)

Steve Allen vs Howard Stern (S. wanted to censor popculture. H. was agin’ it)

Tim Allen vs Jonathan Taylor Thomas (J. snubbed the finale of Home Improvement)

Kirstie Alley vs Christina Applegate (After C.’s show outperformed K’s, K tried to get WB execs to cancel C’s show)

Kirstie Alley vs Yasmine Bleeth (Random bitchiness, with Y mocking K’s weight)

Kirstie Alley vs Shelly Long (Alley was disdainful of Long's leaving Cheers)

Kirstie Alley vs Parker Stevenson (Bitter divorce)

Robert Altman vs. Donald Sutherland & Elliot Gould (They tried to get him fired from MASH)

Tiffani Amber-Thiessen vs Sarah Michelle Gellar (T. claims that SMG stole T.'s wedding plans via their mutual wedding planner)

Gillian Anderson vs David Duchovny (Too much time together on the set of X-Files; time has mostly healed this feud)

Gillian Anderson vs Sharon Stone (Source of this remains unclear, but S. was talking about G. when she said she'd never work with a tv actress again)

Pamela Anderson vs Kim Cattrall (P. is a PETA member; K. loves leather, fur, and fishing)

Pamela Anderson vs Jenny McCarthy (Rivalry over similar roles)

Jennifer Aniston vs Howie Mandel (He dared ask her about Brad Pitt)

Jennifer Aniston vs Gwyneth Paltrow (G. angry at J. for Brad Pitt leaving her for her)

Jennifer Aniston vs Britney Spears (B. made public moves on Brad, which J. took exception to)

Jennifer Aniston vs Reese Witherspoon (J. was horrible to R. on the set of Friends; most likely due to J.'s jealousy/insecurity towards R.)

Fiona Apple vs Bloodhound Gang (B.G. had some crude things to say about F.A., and she, humorless as ever, did not take them well)

Fiona Apple vs Janeane Garofalo (J. criticised one of F.'s typically vacuous screeds; F. called J. a "cowardly *****")

Fiona Apple vs Dennis Leary (D. criticised one of F.'s typically vacuous screeds, making F. cry)

Fiona Apple vs Ozzy Osbourne (He mocked her in a bit of music video trickery)

David Arquette vs Rosie O'Donnell (R. just thinks that D. is an idiot, and has said so publicly. The evidence seems to bear her position out)

Bea Arthur vs Betty White (Bad blood from the Golden Girls set)

Fred Astaire vs Ginger Rogers (G. always felt that F. grabbed too much credit for what they achieved together)

Fred Astaire vs John Travolta.

Burt Bacharach vs Whitney Houston (W. was on drugs during an Oscar rehearsal, so B. fired her)

Backstreet Boys vs *NSYNC (Really, who cares why they hate each other? I just want to see them fight it out with pungi stakes)

Kenny (R2D2) Baker vs Anthony (C3PO) Daniels (Stupid, petty ego clash)

The Baldwin Brothers vs Kim Basinger (for alleging that Alec hit her)

Lucille Ball vs Joan Crawford

Drew Barrymore vs Robert Downey, Jr. (D. criticized R. for his drug use)

Drew Barrymore vs Christian Slater (D. criticized C. for his drug use)

Drew Barrymore vs Penny Marshall (D. pissed P. off with her unprofessional behavior on the set of Driving in Cars with Boys)

Kim Basinger vs Jack Nicholson (Bad on-set relations on Batman)

Bee Gees vs Robbie Williams (The Bee Gees hated R.’s version of “I Started A Joke”)

Harry Belafonte vs Colin Powell (Belafonte called Powll a sell-out)

Candace Bergen vs Steve McQueen (Bad on-set relations on The Sand Pebbles)

Sandra Bernhard vs Tom Cruise (She's disdainful of his closeted act)

Sandra Bernhard vs Ellen Degeneres

Sandra Bernhard vs Courtney Love

Sandra Bernhard vs Madonna

Halle Berry vs Angela Bassett (AB slammed Monster's Ball because AB thought HB's character was demeaning to black women)

Halle Berry vs Howie Mandel (He made a comment about her auto "accident." She did not take this well)

Mr. Blackwell vs. Anne Robinson (He pointed out that she's badly dressed. He's right)

Mary J. Blige vs Queen Latifah (Mysterious hotel fight–lovers’ quarrel?)

Blur vs the Spice Girls (B. slagged the Girls off in the papers)

Dirk Bogarde vs Judy Garland (Bad on-set relations on I Could Go On Singing)

Humphrey Bogart vs Audrey Hepburn (He was jealous of her on the set of Sabrina)

Humphrey Bogart vs William Holden (Bad on-set relations on Sabrina)

Humphrey Bogart vs Ida Lupino (Bad on-set relations on High Sierra)

Humphrey Bogart vs Billy Wilder (Over Bogart’s anti-Semitism)

David Bowie vs Kula Shaker

Boy George vs Janet Jackson ('cause JJ recorded a song with a venomous homophobe)

Boy George vs George Michael (Random bitchiness)

Boy George vs Oasis (Random bitchiness)

Boy George vs Gavin Rossdale (BG outed GR, to GR’s anger)

Marlon Brando vs Bob Hope (BH mocked MB at the Oscars)

Marlon Brando vs Val Kilmer (Val did his usual shtick on the set of Island of Dr. Moreau)

Brandy vs Whitney Houston (W’s jealousy over B’s success)

Brandy vs Monica (They fought backstage at the MTV Video Music Awards in 1998)

Toni Braxton vs Beyonce Knowles & Jay-Z (T. claims the pair plagiarized one of her singles)

Matthew Broderick vs Greta van Susteren (He tweaked her for her cosmetic surgery. She fired back at his troubled marriage)

Albert Brooks vs Adam Sandler (Albert Brooks correctly noted how shallow and vapid Sandler’s “comedies” are)

Pierce Brosnan vs Sean Connery (Despite S’s public statements he doesn’t think P does a good job as Bond)

Helen Gurley Brown vs Tina Brown (Duelling egos)

William F. Buckley vs Gore Vidal (Homophobia, pure and simple. Plus Buckley's envy over Vidal's superior talent)

Sandra Bullock vs Julia Roberts (S.B. took Benjamin Bratt's side in the Roberts-Bratt breakup)

David Byrne vs the rest of Talking Heads (Bad musical breakup)

Richard Burton vs Michael Caine (Caine is jealous that he never received the credit that Burton did)

James Caan vs Bette Midler (Bad on-set relations on For The Boys)

Nicholas Cage vs Stephen Baldwin (S. pointed out that Cage isn’t a good actor)

Nicholas Cage vs Sean Penn (Penn made some indiscreet, albeit accurate, comments about Cage's "acting")

Dean Cain vs Teri Hatcher (Really did not get along on the set of Lois and Clark)

James Cameron vs Kate Winslet (Cameron, that asshole, called Winslet “Kate Weighs-a-lot”)

Naomi Campbell vs Tyra Banks (N is jealous of T)

Naomi Campbell vs Bijou Phillips (Over Sean Lennon)

Naomi Campbell vs PETA (First she didn't wear fur, then she did)

Mariah Carey vs Christina Aguilera

Mariah Carey vs Sandra Bernhard (S was scornful of M in one of S’s shows)

Mariah Carey vs Jennifer Lopez (Jealousy)

Mariah Carey vs Mira Sorvino (Bad on-set relations on Wise Girls)

Johnny Carson vs Joan Rivers (He feels she betrayed him)

David Caruso vs Kim Delaney (On-set friction)

Cher vs Oprah (O. bushwhacked C. on her show with a clip of C. at Sonny Bono's funeral)

Cher vs Sonny Bono (A marriage gone wrong)

Chow Yun Fat vs Mira Sorvino (Sorvino was snotty towards Chow during the making of Replacement Killers)

Chumbawumba vs Prodigy (Uppity lefties vs. "there's nothing wrong with 'smack my ***** up' lyrics" morons)

George Lucas vs Connie Chung (Chung recorded unflattering comments about Lucas before and after an interview she did with him.)

Connie Chung vs Barbara Walters & Diane Sawyer (CC feels that the pair had a lot to do with CC’s ouster from CBS)

Dick Clark vs the Grammys (DC feels that the Grammys blacklist performers who appear on his show)

Bill Clinton vs Jodie Foster & Robert Zemeckis (Clinton was upset that his image was used without his permission in Contact)

Bill Clinton vs Al Gore (The incompetent and feckless Gore wasted all that Clinton had done and ran such a bad campaign that George W. Bush actually got elected. And that's why we should all be against Al Gore)

Hillary Clinton vs Robert Redford

George Clooney vs Hard Copy & Entertainment Tonight (Clooney was upset over tabloid tv)

George Clooney vs Bill O'Reilly (O'Reilly is scum. That's all the reason any of us need)

Claudette Colbert vs Veronica Lake vs Paulette Goddard (Bad on-set relations on So Proudly We Hail)

Joan Collins vs Frank Langella (Duelling egos)

Chris Columbus vs Michael Jackson (CC warned MJ to stay away from Daniel Radcliffe, of the Harry Potter films)

Alice Cooper vs Marilyn Manson (A., a born-again Xian, is offended by M.'s shtick)

Billy Corgan vs Black Crowes (General musical bitchiness)

Billy Corgan vs Courtney Love (Friendship/romance gone wrong)

Billy Corgan vs Green Day (General musical bitchiness)

Bill Cosby and the cast of The Cosby Show vs Lisa Bonet (L. has always been an ingrate towards B., who gave her far too many chances)

Katie Couric vs Ann Coulter (Because Coulter is an evil nitwit and Couric is not)

Katie Couric vs Diane Sawyer (Duelling egos)

Courtney Cox vs Rosie O'Donnell (Over the "dippy" David Arquette. What a thing to fight over....)

Wes Craven vs Madonna (A feud over W's 50 Violins)

Joan Crawford vs Bette Davis (Bad on-set relations on Whatever Happened to Baby Jane)

Joan Crawford vs Mercedes McCambridge (J was jealous of how much the crew liked M on the set of Johnny Guitar)

Joan Crawford vs Elizabeth Taylor (General bitchiness)

Creed vs Limp Bizkit (Duelling egos from two groups who are in denial about their mediocre talents)

David Crosby vs 'NSync and Britney Spears (Old fart Crosby disdainful of modern bubblegum music. Pot, kettle, black)

Russell Crowe vs Joan Collins (J. dogged Russell's looks)

Russell Crowe vs Denzel Washington (Washington refused to shake Crowe's hand backstage at the Oscars)

Russell Crowe vs Moby (R. manhandled Moby for presuming to use the same men's room as R. What a jerk!)

Penelope Cruz vs Nicole Kidman (Over Tom Cruise, of all things!)

John Cusack vs. George W. Bush (Because Cusack is a right-thinking gentleman who sees Dubya for the religious fascist that he is)

John Cusack vs Demi Moore (J. vocally disapproved of Indecent Proposal and of Moore for being in it; this stems back to bad relations on the One Crazy Summer set)

Matt Damon vs Russell Crowe (R. made a pass at Winona Ryder, who at the time was dating Damon)

Matt Damon vs. Chris O'Donnell (M dogged C’s partying behavior)

Matt Damon vs Annie Leibowitz and Vanity Fair (AL took MD’s picture when MD didn’t want to be photographed; VF then ran the photo)

Matt Damon vs Charlie Sheen (M dogged CS’s partying behavior)

Claire Danes vs Leonardo DiCaprio (Because Leo, that asshole, treated her horribly. If G-d is just, always a dodgy proposition, Leo will be treated equally badly someday)

Tony Danza vs Bill Clinton (Danze disapproved of Clinton's behavior in office)

Tony Danza vs Ellen DeGeneres (TD attacked Ellen’s open display of affection with Anne Heche. But then, Danza’s a moron, so this should surprise no one)

Bette Davis vs Faye Dunaway (Bad on-set relations)

Bette Davis vs Errol Flynn (Bad on-set relations on Elizabeth and Essex)

Bette Davis vs John Ford (He acted badly on the set of Pocketful of Miracles)

Bette Davis vs Lillian Gish (Bad on-set relations on The Whales of August)

Judy Davis vs David Lean (Bad on-set relations on A Passage To India)

Doris Day vs Kirk Douglas

Judi Dench vs Gwyneth Paltrow (Gwyneth displayed her considerable ego and counter-impressed Dame Dench)

Robert De Niro vs Dustin Hoffman (Bad on-set relations on Wag the Dog)

Bob Denver vs Tina Louise (Bad on-set relations on Gilligan’s Island)

Johnny Depp vs Roman Polanski (Bad on-set relations on The Ninth Gate)

Alan Dershowitz vs Woody Allen (Dershowitz disapproved of Woody's statutory rape)

Cameron Diaz vs Matt Dillon (Bad break-up)

Cameron Diaz vs Bill Murray (Diaz acted badly on the set of Charlie's Angels)

Leonardo DiCaprio vs Ellen Barkin (Bad on-set relations on This Boy’s Life)

Leonardo DiCaprio vs Martin Scorsese (Bad blood from the set of Gangs of New York)

Leonardo DiCaprio vs Alicia Silverstone (It was hate at first sight)

Andy Dick vs Chris Kattan (A. was offended by C.'s imitation of him on SNL)

Bo Diddley vs Will Smith (Bo was scornful of W’s “Gettin’ jiggy with it”)

P. Diddy vs Pink (she slammed his rapping "ability")

Marlene Dietrich vs Madonna (Marlene felt Madonna was stealing her act)

Celine Dion vs Mariah Carey (One of Celine’s #1 hits was pulled back because it was in danger of passing Mariah’s record for weeks at #1)

Shannon Doherty vs the cast of Charmed & W.B. (Because Doherty acted like an asshole. Quelle surprise, non?)

Shannon Doherty vs Matthew Perry (Bad break-up)

Shannon Doherty vs Molly Ringwald (A little matter of one’s parties making it impossible for the other to find parking spaces)

Bob & Libby Dole vs George W. Bush (Because Dubya is a conniving, backstabbing weasel with the heart of a serial killer)

Kirk Douglas vs Burt Lancaster (Duelling egos)

Michael Douglas vs Sean Young (Bad on-set relations on Wall Street)

David Duchovny vs Madonna

David Duchovny vs Robert James Waller (Because Duchovny suffered through Waller's book)

Robert Duvall vs Russell Crowe (Crowe wouldn’t do one of Duvall’s films)

Robert Duvall vs France (RD doesn’t like the superior attitude of some French)

Anthony Edwards vs Eriq LaSalle (LaSalle acted badly on the set of ER)

Eminem vs Ben Affleck (Eminem being a jerk)

Eminem vs Fred Durst (Eminem being a jerk)

Eminem vs Everlast (Eminem being a jerk)

Eminem vs Whitney Houston (Eminem being a jerk)

Eminem vs Moby (is it a feud when one member, Eminem, is completely beneath the other?)

Eminem vs Britney Spears (Eminem being a jerk)

Eminem vs Justin Timberlake (Eminem being a jerk)

Erik Estrada vs Larry Wilcox (The post-Chips years were not kind to Wilcox, while Estrada's ego has grown along with his waistline)

Joe Eszterhas vs Mike Ovitz (Duelling egos)

Robert Evans vs Francis Ford Coppola (Disputed credit over the Godfather)

Robert Evans vs Dustin Hoffman (Clashing egos)

Everclear vs Bush (Talent vs pretense and ego. If Bush is never heard from again G-d will have that much less reason to kill us all)

Everclear vs No Doubt (Talent vs hacks)

Rupert Everett vs Pierce Brosnan (Brosnan's homophobia)

Rupert Everett vs Mariah Carey

Rupert Everett vs Hugh Grant (Duelling egos)

Colin Farrell vs Bruce Willis (BW kept forgetting his lines on the set of Hart's War)

Farrah Fawcett vs Raquel Welch (Duelling egos)

Corey Feldman vs Ben Affleck (CF being jealous)

Corey Feldman vs Matt Damon (CF being jealous)

Corey Feldman vs Marilyn Manson (CF showing discernment)

Corey Feldman vs Dennis Miller (CF showing discernment)

Fergie vs Queen Elizabeth ('cause the Queen is an uptight hag who never enjoyed life and doesn't like when others do)

Carrie Fisher vs Eddie Fisher (he was a lousy dad)

Carrie Fisher vs Harrison Ford (he was a schmuck towards her after their so-brief affair)

Peter Fonda vs Dennis Hopper (Long-time friendship ruined because of money)

Joan Fontaine vs Cary Grant (Bad on-set relations on Suspicion)

Joan Fontaine vs Olivia De Havilland (O. was angry that J. got the role in Rebecca that O. wanted)

Joan Fontaine vs Laurence Olivier (L. was angry that J. got the role in Rebecca over Olivia de Havilland)

Foo Fighters vs Bush (Duelling egos)

Harrison Ford vs Anne Heche (Ford's homophobia)

Harrison Ford vs Brad Pitt (Bad on-set relations on The Devil’s Own)

Harrison Ford vs Sean Young (Bad on-set relations on Blade Runner)

Jodie Foster vs Michael Douglas (Bad on-set relations on The Game)

Jodie Foster vs Whitney Houston (Part of a lover’s triangle with Kelly McGillis)

Jamie Foxx vs Spike Lee (SL called African-American sitcoms ‘minstrel shows.’ JF took exception to that)

Jamie Foxx vs David Letterman (Foxx being a jerk)

Jamie Foxx vs LL Cool J (Jamie, don't even think about this one. Just shut up, already. LL is far cooler than you can dream of)

John Frankenheimer vs Val Kilmer (Val did his usual shtick on the set of The Island of Dr. Moreau)

Aretha Franklin vs Gladys Knight (Duelling egos)

Liam Gallagher vs Noel Gallagher (Brotherly hate)

Noel Gallagher vs George Michael (N. points out that G.'s attempt at social commentary is hypocritical)

Noel Gallagher vs Michael Stipe (Duelling egos)

Noel & Liam Gallagher vs the Rolling Stones (Duelling egos)

Vincent Gallo vs Anjelica Houston (Gallo being a prick)

James Gandolfini vs Uma Thurman & Ethan Hawke (Over a failed business deal)

Greta Garbo vs Marlene Dietrich

Leif Garrett vs Britney Spears (L thinks BS is out of control, and said so)

Bob Geldof vs Michael Hutchence/Paula Yates (Because Yates is a complete nutter)

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Neve Campbell (Matthew Perry was cheating on SMG with Neve)

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Alyson Hannigan (Gellar is jealous because Alyson is well-liked on the Buffy set, and SMG is not)

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Matthew Perry (Matthew Perry cheated on SMG with Neve Campbell)

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Julia Roberts

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Kerri Russell (SMG was scornful of Kerri's distasteful sexual boasts)

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs the Spice Girls (Random bitchiness)

Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Britney Spears (SMG kept BS from appearing on Buffy)

Mel Gibson vs. Bono (Bono thinks that Mel buried The Million Dollar Hotel, which Bono was involved with)

Mel Gibson vs the Vatican (M., despite being a Catholic, doesn't think much of the Vatican)

John Gielgud vs Laurence Olivier (Just didn’t like each other)

Kathy Lee Gifford vs Regis Philbin (Bad on-set relations, although, really, neither one is anything approaching, oh, what's the word I'm looking for, nice)

Kathy Lee Gifford vs Howard Stern (He never tired of pointing out her flaws)

Kathy Lee Gifford vs Ivana Trump (The company that publishes Ivana’s magazine published reports of KLG’s cheating husband)

Melissa Gilbert & Mike Farrell vs Fred Savage, Valerie Harper, Elliott Gould, and Kent McCord (Stupid, petty S.A.G. stuff)

Terry Gilliam vs Robert DeNiro (Bad on-set relations on Brazil)

Danny Glover vs Spike Lee (DG dogged Spike’s movies)

Whoopi Goldberg vs Oprah Winfrey (W tweaked O’s ego)

Bobcat Goldthwaite vs Jay Leno (BG did his shtick on Leno’s show. Leno didn’t like it)

Bobcat Goldthwaite vs Steve Martin (Comedians' rivalry)

Bobcat Goldthwaite vs Jerry Seinfeld (B decried J’s $cientology and “porking teenage girls”)

Elliot Gould vs Jerry Lewis (Duelling egos)

Kelsey Grammar vs Howard Stern (Because Stern poked humorless fun at Grammar, who was not amused)

Hugh Grant vs Tom Cruise (Grant was scornful of Cruise appearing shirtless on magazine covers. Said it wasn't 'manly.' I couldn't make this up if I tried)

Brian Austin Green vs the cast of 90210 (Because he's a punk, and showed that side to the other cast members)

Green Day vs Creed (Duelling egos)

Green Day vs Third Eye Blind (Duelling egos)

Pam Grier vs Spike Lee (P gave S a piece of her mind over S criticizing Tarantino for his use of the N-word)

Merv Griffin vs Donald Trumph (Real estate and ego clash)

John Grisham vs Oliver Stone (G, that hypocritical moron, wanted O charged for violence with Natural Born Killers)

Charles Grodin vs Mia Farrow (Old feud. I’m not sure there really was one incident that started it)

Charles Grodin vs Rush Limbaugh (Grodin has the good judgment to see what a horrible person Rush is)

Charles Grodin vs Howard Stern (Articulate literacy versus the cause of the downfall of American society)

Dave Grohl vs Bush (Duelling egos)

Dave Grohl vs Courtney Love (Fighting over the corpse of Kurt Cobain and the profits to be made from Nirvana's catalogue)

Bob Guccione Sr vs Bob Guccione Jr (Loathesome son versus contemptible father)

Alec Guinness vs Laurence Olivier

Bryant Gumbel vs Katie Couric (Because Katie's adorable and well-liked, so of course Gumbel had to treat her badly)

Sammy Hagar vs Van Halen (Hagar's departure was, shall we say, not amicable)

Bug Hall (Alfalfa on Little Rascals) vs Everyone (*Everybody* hated Alfalfa on Little Rascals)

Tom Hanks vs Bill Clinton (Hanks disapproved of Clinton's behavior while in office. If Tom Hanks disapproves of your behavior, you might as well kill yourself)

Tom Hanks vs 20th Century Fox (T. was unhappy with the "marketing" Fox did for That Thing You Do)

Woody Harrelson vs John Travolta (W. criticized $cientology to J's face, which J, of course, didn't take well)

Richard Harris vs Michael Caine (R. accused M. of ruining his talent through drinking)

Richard Harris vs Kevin Costner (RH felt that KC, in Dances With Wolves, stole scenes from A Man Called Horse)

Richard Harris vs Tom Cruise (RH, rightly, felt that TC overestimates his own importance)

Richard Harris vs Ian McKellen, Derek Jacobi & Kenneth Branagh (R. described them as "passionless" and Branagh as "mediocre")

George Harrison vs nearly every modern musician & band (George never quite got over being a member of the Beatles and couldn't credit modern musicians with being any good)

George Harrison vs Sean Penn (GH produced Shanghai Surprise)

Rex Harrison vs Charlton Heston (Duelling egos)

David Hasselhoff vs Yasmine Bleeth (Bad on-set relations on Baywatch)

Salma Hayek vs Jennifer Lopez (Duelling egos)

Teri Hatcher vs the rest of the cast of Lois and Clark (She was a stuck-up snot while there)

Goldie Hawn vs Bette Midler (Hawn was very unprofessional on the set of First Wives Club)

Nigel Hawthorne vs Sly Stallone and Wesley Snipes (They did not favorably impress him on the set of Demolition Man)

Patricia Heaton vs Michelle Pfeiffer (P. essentially called M. a liar over M.'s claims never to have had plastic surgery)

Don Henley vs Courtney Love & Rush (Henley being a prick, as usual)

Buck Henry vs Mel Brooks

Katharine Hepburn vs John Barrymore (Bad on-set relations on A Bill of Divorcement)

Katharine Hepburn vs Sharon Stone (KH was critical of Basic Instinct)

Charlton Heston vs Alec Baldwin (Conservative gun fanatic versus leftie gun control fan)

Charlton Heston vs Jane Fonda (Political stuff)

Charlton Heston vs Barbara Streisand (Political stuff)

Dustin Hoffman vs Bob Hope

Hootie & the Blowfish vs Spin magazine (Hootie didn't like Spin's coverage)

Anthony Hopkins vs Jodie Foster (A.H. wasn't happy that Jodie wouldn't do Hannibal)

Anthony Hopkins vs Merchant & Ivory (The latter are cheap)

Anthony Hopkins vs Quentin Tarantino

Whitney Houston vs Lauryn Hill (I got this one from Ted Casablanca. Ask him what caused the feud)

Whitney Houston vs Janet Jackson (WH stole a movie role from JJ, JJ put the moves on WH’s husband)

Whitney Houston vs Madonna (Duelling egos)

Whitney Houston vs the rest of the cast of Waiting to Exhale (W.H. was in full diva mode on the set)

Rock Hudson vs James Dean (Didn’t get along on the set of Giant)

Rachel Hunter vs Tara Reid (T. hit on Robbie Williams. R. didn't appreciate that)

Rachel Hunter vs Rod Stewart (Acrimonious divorce)

Elizabeth Hurley vs C. Thomas Howell (Bad on-set relations on Mad Dogs and Englishmen)

Elizabeth Hurley vs Gwyneth Paltrow (Duelling egos)

Elizabeth Hurley vs Julia Roberts (E was jealous of J during the shooting of Notting Hill)

Chrissie Hynde vs Carly Simon (Hynde got drunk and embarassed herself while insulting Simon)

Ice-T vs OJ Simpson ('cause Ice sees that O.J. is a psycho)

Enrique Iglesias versus Julio Iglesias (Weird jealousy and competition thing between the two of them)

Don Imus vs Bill Clinton ('cause Imus disapproved of Clinton's behavior in office)

Don Imus vs Howard Stern (They're competitors, and Stern has always been a putz about his competitors)

Jeremy Irons vs Tina Brown

Janet Jackson vs Mariah Carey (Duelling egos)

Joshua Jackson vs James Van Der Beek (Quarreling over Katie Holmes. Plus JVDB is a schmuck, which J.J. is not)

Michael Jackson vs Boy George (BG recently scared MJ with a stunt)

Michael Jackson vs Corey Feldman (C. thinks M. turned into a megalomaniac. What, you're only noticing that now?)

Michael Jackson vs Sony (MJ feels Sony sabotaged his career)

Michael Jackson vs Steven Spielberg

Samuel L. Jackson vs Spike Lee (SLJ claimed that Quentin Tarantino made “blacker” films than SL)

Wyclef Jean vs Lauryn Hill (Bad Fugees experience for L.H.)

Wyclef Jean vs Michael Jackson (Only M. knows the reason for this one. W. sure doesn't.)

Norman Jewison vs Joan Rivers (JR claimed that NJ treated his mistress, JR’s pal, badly)

Billy Joel vs Christie Brinkley (Bitter divorce)

Elton John vs David Bowie

Elton John vs Madonna

Elton John vs Keith Richards (Random bitchiness)

Angelina Jolie vs Winona Ryder (A.J. was underwhelmed by W.R. when they acted together)

James Earl Jones vs Spike Lee (JEJ thinks SL is a publicity-chasing loudmouth.)

Jon Bon Jovi vs Demi Moore

Harvey Keitel vs Edward James Olmos (Over Lorraine Braco)

Harvey Keitel vs Lorraine Braco (Bad break-up)

David E. Kelley vs Holland Taylor (Kelley's ego got in the way of recognizing Taylor's talent)

Patsy Kensit vs Liam Gallagher ('cause he's an asshole)

Chaka Khan vs Bill Clinton (She disapproved of his thing with Monica Lewinsky)

Kid Rock vs Tommy Lee (Over Pamela Anderson)

Val Kilmer vs Marlon Brando (Bad on-set relations on The Island of Dr. Moreau)

Val Kilmer vs Michael Douglas (They rubbed each other the wrong way on the set of Ghost and Darkness)

Val Kilmer vs Elizabeth Shue (Bad on-set relations on The Saint)

Val Kilmer vs Christian Slater (They fell out while working together on We Believe in God)

Steven King vs Nicholson Baker (King accurately described Baker's work as 'literary nail-trimmings.')

Sam Kinison vs Whoopi Goldberg (He was a sexist and a racist. That's reason enough)

Klaus Kinski vs Werner Herzog (Kinski was just awful to work with)

Nastassja Kinski vs Klaus Kinski (He was a bad father to her)

Suge Knight vs Snoop Dogg and P. Diddy (East Coast-v-West Coast hip hop feud thing)

Anna Kournikova vs Liz Hurley (A. called L. "ugly"--shouldn't you be concentrating on your tennis career, you skank?)

Anna Kournikova vs Venus & Serena Williams (A.K. is a conceited punk. The Williams sisters are even worse. Naturally, they don't get along)

Lisa Kudrow vs the rest of the cast of Friends (They've grown tired of her attitude & complaining about Phoebe not having a man)

K.D. Lang vs Britney Spears, Mariah Carey, Christina Aguilera and Shania Twain.

Matt Lauer vs Bill O'Reilly (Does anyone really need a reason to dislike Bill O'Reilly?)

Dino De Laurentiis vs Jodie Foster (Because Foster wouldn’t act in Hannibal)

Simon Le Bon vs John Taylor (Clashing egos)

John Le Carre vs Salman Rushdie (Le Carre disgraced himself by siding against Rushdie during l'affaire Satanic Verses)

Spike Lee vs James Cameron (S doesn’t think much of J as a director)

Spike Lee vs Jonathan Demme (Because J dared to direct Beloved)

Spike Lee vs Cuba Gooding Jr (S was angry at C’s 1997 Oscar speech. S mocked C in Bamboozled)

Spike Lee vs Charlton Heston (Over gun control)

Spike Lee vs Tommy Hilfiger (Because S buys into the lie that Hilfiger made racist comments)

Spike Lee vs George Lucas (Because of the loathsome Jar-Jar Binks)

Spike Lee vs Eddie Murphy (Because EM is responsible for The PJs, which Spikesaid “shows no love for black people”)

Spike Lee vs Ving Rhames (S thought poorly of V giving his Golden Globe to Jack Lemmon)

Spike Lee vs Will Smith (S is angry at W for playing Matt Damon’s caddy in a movie and because W chose Michael Mann to direct Ali)

Spike Lee vs Steven Spielberg (S thinks Spielberg has a double standard between movies about blacks and movies about Jews)

Spike Lee vs Quentin Tarantino (S.L. was offended by the use of the N-word in Pulp Fiction0

Spike Lee vs Robert Townsend (S.L. was offended that another black writer/director/actor was successful)

Julian Lennon vs Yoko Ono (Julian feels that Yoko ruined his dad)

Vivian Leigh vs Marlon Brando (V. found Brando “repulsive” on A Streetcar Named Desire)

Vivian Leigh vs Clark Gable (V. thought C. was smelly and vain, C. thought V was a foul-mouthed brat)

Vivian Leigh vs Lee Marvin (V disapproved of L’s drinking on-set on Ship of Fools)

Annie Lennox vs Elton John (AL gave a scathing interview about EJ)

David Letterman vs Cher (Because she called him an 'asshole' on set)

David Letterman vs Madonna

Barry Levinson vs Stephen Spielberg (BL feels that SS sabotaged An Everlasting Piece so that SS could get a knighthood)

Jerry Lewis vs Abbott & Costello (J. thought the pair were mediocre. He’s right.)

Jerry Lewis vs Dean Martin (It was an ego thing)

Jerry Lewis vs every comedienne living and dead (He said that women aren't funny and don't make good comedians)

Li'l Kim vs Jennifer Lopez (L called J a “gold-digger”)

Lucy Liu vs Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, and Bill Murray (Liu acted badly on the set of Charlie's Angels)

Lucy Liu vs Calista Flockhart (Jealousy over Ally McBeal stuff)

Lucy Liu vs Thandie Newton (T blamed L for the on-set tension on Charlie’s
Angels)

Jennifer Lopez vs Claire Danes (J doesn’t think C is much of an actress)

Jennifer Lopez vs Cameron Diaz (J doesn’t think CD is much of an actress)

Jennifer Lopez vs Woody Harrelson (J got annoyed with W’s jerk shtick)

Jennifer Lopez vs Selma Hayek (J accused S of being a liar)

Jennifer Lopez vs Madonna (J doesn’t think M is much of an actress)

Jennifer Lopez vs Jack Nicholson (JL thinks JN is an egomaniac. In this case she’s right)

Jennifer Lopez vs Rosie O'Donnell

Jennifer Lopez vs Gwyneth Paltrow (J doesn’t think G is much of an actress)

Jennifer Lopez vs Winona Ryder (J doesn’t think W is much of an actress)

Jennifer Lopez vs Wesley Snipes (J got annoyed at W’s constant passes at her)

Jennifer Lopez vs Britney Spears (B. kept J. waiting for a half-hour once, years ago. How dare she?)

Courtney Love vs Fiona Apple (Oh, there are any number of reasons for this one)

Courtney Love vs The Cranberries (CL was nasty about them)

Courtney Love vs Madonna (Friendship gone bad)

Courtney Love vs Alanis Morrissette

Courtney Love vs Charlize Theron (Bad on-set relations on Trapped)

Courtney Love vs Donatella Versace

Rob Lowe vs the cast of West Wing (He acts like a diva on the set)

Susan Lucci vs Sarah Michelle Gellar (Long-running feud from their acting days together)

Lorna Luft vs Charlton Heston (She dislikes the NRA)

John Lydon vs Liam Gallagher (Lydon slagged Oasis in print)

John Lydon vs most rap artists (Lydon went on, at length, about what crap rap is)

Norm MacDonald vs Don Ohlmeyer (Ohlmeyer essentially had MacDonald thrown off of Saturday Night Live)

Shirley Maclaine vs David Letterman (DL badgered SM about her reincarnation claims)

Shirley Maclaine vs Debra Winger (Bad on-set relations on Terms of Endearment)

Madonna vs Sandra Bernhard (Ruined friendship)

Madonna vs Boy George (He made fun of her in his musical Taboo)

Madonna vs Anthony Burgess (AB, of Madonna: “the bland leading the blind.”)

Madonna vs Celine Dion

Madonna vs Cher

Madonna vs Rupert Everett (Friendship gone bad)

Madonna vs Mick Jagger

Madonna vs Sly Stallone

Madonna vs Gwen Stefani (M feels GS is stealing her act)

Bill Maher vs Chevy Chase (Chase acted like a humorless prick, and Maher called him on it)

Bill Maher vs Ted Koppel (BM pointed out that TK estimates himself a little too highly)

Bill Maher vs Sophia Loren (BM said that SL is repulsive because she’s old. Not one of BM’s brighter moments)

Camryn Manheim vs Monica Lewinsky (Manheim disapproved of Lewinsky's behavior with Clinton)

Marilyn Manson vs Courtney Love (Manson picked a fight for the publicity.)

Marilyn Manson vs Moby (Moby saw MM being an asshole and called him on it)

Marilyn Manson vs Christina Ricci (MM being an asshole)

Marilyn Manson vs Spin Magazine (MM roughed up Spin’s editor)

Shirley Manson vs Jennifer Lopez (SM pointed out that JL is acting like a diva)

Walter Matthau vs Babs Streisand (Bad on-set relations on Hello Dolly)

Chris Matthews vs Ted Koppel (Duelling journalistic egos)

Paul McCartney vs Michael Jackson (Because Jackson bought the Beatles catalogue and began peddling it for commercials)

Paul McCartney vs Oasis (P’s jealousy over Oasis’ making money from the musical corpse of the Beatles)

Paul McCartney vs Phil Spector (PM hated what PS did to “The Long And Winding Road”)

Eric McCormack (Will) vs Debra Messing (Grace) (He's well-liked on the set. She's a shrill, humorless, self-important shrew who thinks she's above such things as palling with crew members)

Matthew McConaughey vs P. Diddy (P was angry that MM kissed J.Lo in The Wedding Planner)

Frank McCourt vs Richard Harris (Harris vehemently disliked McCourt's depiction of Ireland in Angela's Ashes)

Rose McGowan vs Woody Allen (Over Soon-yi)

Rose McGowan vs most everyone involved with the Lilith Fair (Rose being an asshole)

Ewan McGregor vs Minnie Driver (E doesn’t think much of M’s relentless pursuit of fame)

Natalie Merchant vs Courtney Love (CL wasn’t upbeat enough about the Lilith Fair)

George Michael vs Whitney Houston

Bette Midler vs Cher (Long-time feud)

Bette Midler vs Shelley Long (Bad on-set relations on Outrageous Fortune)

Bette Midler vs Ken Wahl (Bad on-set relations on Jinxed)

Alyssa Milano vs Shannon Doherty ('cause Doherty acted badly on the set of Charmed)

Ray Milland vs Marlene Dietrich (Bad on-set relations on Golden Earrings)

Dennis Miller vs Rush Limbaugh (Asshole vs asshole)

Liza Minnelli vs Tony Roberts (Bad on-set relations on Victor/Victoria)

Kylie Minogue vs Britney Spears (KM is jealous of BS’ fame)

Joni Mitchell vs Jackson Browne (Ill-will from the break-up of their relationship)

Joni Mitchell vs Kurt Cobain (JM said that KC wrote bad songs and set a bad example for today’s youth)

Robert Mitchum vs Shelley Winters (Bad on-set relations on Night of the Hunter)

Marilyn Monroe vs Tony Curtis (Bad on-set relations on Some Like It Hot)

Marilyn Monroe vs Clark Gable (M was very unprofessional on the set of The Misfits)

Marilyn Monroe vs Jack Lemmon (M was very unprofessional on the set of Some Like It Hot)

Van Morrison vs Bruce Springsteen (Jealousy on V’s part)

Morrissey vs the Smiths (Bad blood after their separation)

Kate Moss vs Claudia Schiffer (Duelling models’ egos)

Motorhead vs WASP (Let’s hope they both kill each other, eh?)

Kate Mulgrew vs Robert Beltran (Beltran criticized the writing on ST:Voyager. Mulgrew didn’t like that)

Eddie Murphy vs David Spade (DS mocked EM on SNL)

Bill Murray vs Chevy Chase (Bad on-set relations on SNL)

Bill Murray vs Dustin Hoffman (Bad on-set relations on Tootsie)

Dave Navarro vs Fiona Apple (He was creepy towards her, verging on stalking)

Dave Navarro vs Marilyn Manson (A pox on both their houses, I say)

Martina Navratilova vs Michael Jordan (Because she thinks he should have done more--i.e., done just about anything to help anyone other than himself and his bank account)

Jack Nicholson vs Angelica Huston (Bitter separation)

Oasis vs Blur (Oasis being assholes)

Oasis vs Chumbawumba (Duelling egos)

Joyce Carol Oates vs Truman Capote (He said of her: "[She] is a joke monster who ought to be beheaded in a public auditorium ... To me, she's the most loathsome creature in America. I've seen her, and to see her is to loathe her. To read her is to absolutely vomit.”)

Carroll O’Connor vs Norman Lear (Bad on-set relations on All in the Family)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Woody Allen (Over Soon-yi)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Bill Clinton (He disgusts her for all the obvious reasons)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Bryant Gumbel (Does anyone need a reason to hate Bryant Gumbel?)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Anne Heche (R finds A not gay enough)

Rosie O’Donnell vs Charlton Heston (Over the NRA and guns)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Michael Jackson (For all the obvious reasons)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Liza Minnelli (Liza backed out of Rosie's final show to do The View)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Kelly Ripa (KR went public with it being Rosie who humiliated Susan Lucci)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Joan Rivers (Rosie thinks Joan is mean-spirited, and said so.)

Rosie O’Donnell vs Tom Selleck (Over guns; Rosie was rude to Tom about that on her show)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Sharon Stone (Random bitchiness)

Rosie O'Donnell vs Oprah Winfrey (Jealousy is an ugly thing)

Gary Oldman vs Winona Ryder (They hated each other on the set of Dracula)

Tatum O'Neal vs John McEnroe (Bitter divorce)

Laurence Olivier vs Marilyn Monroe (Bad on-set relations on The Prince and the Showgirl)

Laurence Olivier vs Merle Oberon (Bad on-set relations on Wuthering Heights)

Yoko Ono vs George Harrison, Paul McCartney, and Ringo Starr (The classic musical feud)

Bill O'Reilly vs Ann Coulter (Duelling egos)

Bill O'Reilly vs Rolling Stone

Tony Orlando vs Wayne Newton (Business deal gone very wrong)

Ozzy Osbourne vs Marilyn Manson (Because Ozzy is a man of taste and refinement)

The Osbournes vs Bill Cosby (BC criticized the family as "sad")

The Osbournes vs Ted Nugent (Nugent, asshole that he is, described Ozzy as a "blithering, hopeless idiot," and Ozzy & Sharon returned fire)

Donny Osmond vs Marie Osmond (Sibling rivalry)

Peter O'Toole vs Michael Caine (O'Toole agrees with Richard Harris that Caine frittered his talent away with booze)

Al Pacino vs Francis Ford Coppola (Bad on-set relations on Godfather III)

Al Pacino vs Keanu Reeves (Bad on-set relations)

Camille Paglia vs Ralph Fiennes (She described him as ‘antiseptic’)

Gwyneth Paltrow vs Joseph Fiennes (Bad on-set relations on Shakespeare in Love)

Gwyneth Paltrow vs Minnie Driver (Over Matt Damon, of all things)

Gwyneth Paltrow vs Jennifer Lopez (Over Ben Affleck! Girl, please!)

Sarah Jessica Parker vs Kim Cattrall vs Cynthia Nixon vs Kristen Davis (After six years nobody likes anybody on the set of Sex and the City)

Mandy Patinkin vs Pat Benatar

Mandy Patinkin vs the Chicago Hope cast & crew (He was a complete schmuck during his tenure on the show)

Sean Penn vs Bill O'Reilly (Duelling egos)

Sean Penn vs Howard Stern (Duelling egos)

Matthew Perry vs Matt LeBlanc (Bad on-set relations on Friends)

Matthew Perry vs Selma Hayek (Did not get along at all when they acted together)

Brad Pitt vs Tom Cruise (Bad on-set relations on Interview with the Vampire)

Brad Pitt vs Harrison Ford (Bad on-set relations on The Devil’s Own)

Roman Polanski vs Faye Dunaway (Bad on-set relations on Chinatown)

Roman Polanski vs John Travolta (Bad on-set relations on The Double, and Roman trashed $cientology)

Kelly Preston vs Lisa Marie Presley ($cientology feud)

Andre Previn vs Woody Allen (Over Woody & Andre’s daughter, Soon-Yi)

Prodigy vs Madonna (Duelling egos)

Prodigy vs Rolling Stone magazine (Prodigy were upset over a RS feature on them)

Prodigy vs Spice Girls (Duelling egos)

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

2

Answer 4

3

Answer 5

4

Answer 6

5

Answer 7

Harry Hamlin Gay

Answer 8

Richard Simmons
Andy Dick
Tom Cruise
Richard Gere
Cindy Crawford
Clay Aiken
Marcia Cross

Answer 9

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Answer 10

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RE:
What celebs you think are gay in Hollywood and hiding it?
Why don't they just come out...

Answer 11

Merv Griffin Gay