I recently got married and have not been able to have intercourse with my husband because of the pain. It has been three weeks now and we have used lubricant and tried many times, but I feel a burning sensation and pain as soon as he touches me. Is this normal? What can I do? Did it hurt as much for you (women only)? Please help! It's very important to me! THANKS! :-)
2006-09-17 14:30:45 · 12 answers · asked by bridetobe 1 in Health ➔ General Health Care ➔ Other - General Health Care
I'm 25 and don't have a UTI...
2006-09-17 14:40:29 · update #1
First of all, don't think of it as intercourse...think of it as "sex."
The first time you have sex, it isn't particularly enjoyable simply because you don't know how it works. But what you are experiencing is completely NORMAL. It took me four years to overcome my fear of sex. I think it takes awhile to get in the right frame of mind and body.
First, make sure that your husband tells you to "Relax!" There's something reassuring to hear a guy say that. Second, you didn't mention whether your husband is engaging in foreplay or not...but if he isn't, it's very possible that the muscles in your vagina just aren't relaxed enough for intercourse to feel comfortable. Your body will release a natural lubricant if you are relaxed and excited. You should have at least 20 or 30 minutes of foreplay the first time.
Make sure that you are excited before you try intercourse...drink coffee with milk before you have foreplay...coffee is an aphrodesiac that will help you relax. Eat some chocolate.
About 30 minutes later, try some slow kissing...watch a romantic movie...massage also will help you to relax. You also need to relax your mind...imagine yourself in his body...feeling whatever he is feeling. You can also try dancing...some bump and grinding. Music has a way of making a woman relax.
Breathing is VERY important...even if you don't feel excited...breathe deeply and heavily because this will help your muscles relax. Sometimes acting like you are excited will actually make you excited.
Don't worry, eventually you will overcome your fears and find yourself enjoying sex. It just takes a little practice.
2006-09-17 15:34:53 · answer #1 · answered by Saura 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See a doctor.
It should not hurt as soon as he touches you. You may experience some discomfort until you get used to it, and tensing up will only make it worse, but a simple touch should not be painful.
Patience, foreplay, and lubricant should be all it takes.
A lot of people tell all these horror stories about all this awful pain and bleeding.
The first time I had sex, I was nervous, expecting the same, but I was simply amazed at how good it felt.
Something else may be wrong. See a gynecologist.
Lovemaking is supposed to feel good.
2006-09-17 14:42:22 · answer #2 · answered by zen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear you're having this problem. It's a wonderful time, and this is probably putting a bad "humbug" on it.
Burning sensation when he touches you? Hmm. You didn't talk at all in your question about whether or not your hymen is intact, but I'm presuming that it is.
Lubrication and lots of foreplay would've been my original thoughts, but you sound like you've tried all those.
In my humble opinion therefore, it's time for medical assistance. I remember that there is a procedure that gynos can do for you that ruptures your hymen for you while under an anaesthetic. This might help.
I hope your'e REALLY communicating with your husband about this, and let him know that you're going to a doctor about it, because I know if I wasn't having sex with my new bride that I was madly in love with I'd be getting sort of panicky at this point! Smile and joke about it as much as possible to let hm know it's going to be OK. [You know, it really IS going to be OK.]
Best wishes, congratulations, too!
2006-09-17 14:39:35 · answer #3 · answered by Jerry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It bothered me so bad the first time, I begged him to not touch me. But I got used to it in a few days though. After 3 weeks, I think you need to see the Dr. The burning sensation may be some type of infec. But don't let it go. Get seen!
2006-09-17 14:40:18 · answer #4 · answered by helpme1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The opening to the vagina is covered by a membrane (called a hymen) that can, at times, be difficult to penetrate. The biggest thing you can do is try to relax and not tense yourself up. I know this is hard when you're anticipating pain. Try having your husband slowly try to dilate your vagina with his well lubricated finger and once you can accept one finger, maybe he can try inserting two or three until your hymen is broken and you are able to accept his penis. If all else fails, see your OBGYN - your hymen can be broken by a physician if it's unusually thick.
2006-09-17 14:36:07 · answer #5 · answered by Ziva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is truly your first time, it can burn and be painful. You and your husband need to use lubrication and patience. Try "opening yourself" up with his fingers to start. Good luck, after the first time you won't even remember this!!!
2006-09-17 14:34:38 · answer #6 · answered by blondegirl1204 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to see your OBGYN to make sure everything is OK. There is always some pain at first, but if you are burning, it could be from the lubricant, best to see your doctor just to make sure you are OK.
2006-09-17 14:33:40 · answer #7 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello,it probably advisable to see a doctor or nurse because either you might have thrush or an infection.I remember the similar symptoms on myself and when i seen the doctor i found out that it was thrush and it didnt help because i was using fragerent soap to clean myself down below which was making it worse.cream from the g.p is totally reccommended and give it a week or so,you and your husband can experience pain free sex.good luck
2006-09-17 14:41:27 · answer #8 · answered by samantha m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something sounds wrong, and if its burning, it's definitely not normal. Consult a doctor right away! The sooner, the better ;]
2006-09-17 14:33:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and talk with an expert (Your Doctor)
Hope everything works out for you and your husband.
2006-09-17 14:40:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋