Why do I have such a hard time making the right decisions in my life?

Question

I have an associates degree, and my IQ is 136. My friends always tell me that I'm so smart. So why do I have such a hard time making good choices in my life? I am also Bipolar, could that be why or maybe something else.

I'd like to hear some other people's theories. Thanks!

Answer 1

Unfortunately major decisions in our life are dictated not only by our heads but by our hearts. And more unfortunately the "fun" choice or the choice we find the most appealing is usually the one that will involve the most risk of being hurt or disappointed.
I don't think being bipolar is at fault here, it is just part of life as we know it.

Answer 2

Charlisa,
Making right decisions
is an acquired art for
most people.

Your IQ of 136 may
have an influence in
that you may be too good
at too many things,
so it becomes very
difficult to decide what
is best for you.

As well, there are
different kinds of
intelligences,
some people are
street smart and
are born with that
6th sense that no
matter what they
do it seems to work.

Others, have to work
really hard at it, but
it is doable. The first
thing to do is to get to
know yourself, what you
like, vs what others expect
of you, what makes you
content, how you can
make a difference, and so
on,

Being Bipolar, I would
think would make you
even more susceptible
to things around you,
thus giving you in some
ways a head start over
others; you've probably
experienced pain, fear,
and things most do not,
so use that to your advantage.
Look at it as an additional
'insight'.

Whatever you do, try
to organize your priorities
and go from there. If you make
a mistake, like we all do, you
just get up, dust off, and
continue on to the next
challenge.

If I had a penny for all the
dust I've accumulated,
I would have the library of
my dreams!

Follow your heart, your
mind and most
importantly, don't
analyze until you paralyze....

All the best!

Answer 3

Intelligence has very little to do with good decision making. When you finally come down to making a decision, it's usually your emotions that confirm whether your decision was correct or not. When your emotional system is out of whack as it can be with a bipoloar disease or anything else that screws up your emotional quotient, you really have no sense of whether your decision was correct or not because your feelings may correlate very little with whether the decision was good or not, so it's hard to be confident in the decision you make.

In little things, just recognize that there aren't always right decisions and that it's very much ok to go either way. It's a matter of personal preference. In big decisions, mull it over some more, and make a decision that you can back up so that when you later have to justify why you made it, at least you had a good reason to make that decision so that you'll have no regrets.

Answer 4

Maybe your difficulty is with how you define "good choices". I always see myself as making the best choice I can at any given moment. If the results are not what I wanted or expected, I chalk it up to an adventure and see what I can learn from it. If I get really frustrated and unhappy, I vent and rage and scream for a while (a few weeks, months or years!) then I sit down and contmeplate ONE thing I could do differently. Just one thing. If I think of more than one thing, it gets me worked up and frustrated again.

Perhaps, like me, you need to learn patience more than anything? When a decision feels "wrong", its usually just because I am not getting what I want. Which isn't really the biggest disaster after all, it just means life is asking something of me I didn't expect. And that's not a bad thing...

Answer 5

Could be many reasons. I've been there, too, but without the bipolar.

My experience has been poor or no guidance fromgrade school and high school, lack of parental involvement, emotional thinker and decision maker, didn't know how to set both short-term and long-term goals for myself.

And I admit that some days I still can't even decide what to eat for breakfast or lunch !

Answer 6

Because you make it hard. Why not carry a notebook around...when you have the decision to make list the pros, cons and where you will be 15mins, 15 months and 15 years after you make that decision.
(i.g. Should I have sex with that amazing girl/guy that I've just met at a hot club without a rubber.

Pros: They hot! I might fall in love or get free sex with no strings.

Cons:STDs, Possible, Creepy crazy person, drag queen/king, serial killer or long lost sister/brother. (you don't know them...remember?)

15mins: Great sex/worse sex ever

15 weeks: STDs...AIDS or you/chick is pregnant.

15 years: Kid asking where their dead beat Dad is, the abortion might affect you more then it should, that person is a complete stranger to you now or your medical insurance has dropped you because you are a risk.)

Answer 7

There different types of smarts in life, street smart book smart decision smart, etc etc.
I know nothing about bipolar but I know making wrong decisions is not hard to do.
Good luck, and follow your heart, might not be smart, but at least it will be true to you.

Answer 8

i have the same problem, and it's affecting me really strongly today (kinda having a panic attack). i think i overthink things, but don't know what to do about it. and i don't know if it's so much that i have a hard time making "good" choices, but that i can't make decisions period. i agonize over them to no end, and destroy situations in the process. like today.

Answer 9

I think the bipolar has a lot to do with it

Answer 10

You may be trying too hard. Just do what comes naturally.