I'm I wrong for not wanting my future mother-in-law to move in during the beginning of my marriage, hell period? She's not sick, she's in her right mind and she has her own place. To top it off she don't want her son to have a life of his own. She's got him all screwed up. I told him that he's got to decide whether its going to his mother or me and I need an answer today, because I'm not marrying his mother. I don't have to live with her and I'm not living with her. I'm a wrong? He can't understand it to save his life. Serious answers please.
2006-09-17 08:32:08 · 21 answers · asked by Phatbum!!! 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
U did the right thing as u are his new family now. Mother needs to stay at her own place. She will just have to get used to the idea that his son is a grown man now with his own responsibilites.
2006-09-17 09:22:29 · answer #1 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you aren't wrong..you are absolutely right and do NOT marry him unless it is clearly understood that his mother will not now, nor ever move in. In fact I would think seriously about whether to marry him or not anyway if he's that screwed up then its pretty obvious the two of you will have a screwed up life. Resolve this or be done with him.
2006-09-17 15:36:22 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be aware of the fact that his Mother will be in your life no matter what. Is she pressing to move in or is your hubby pressing the issue. Either way it is wrong
He needs to cut those apron strings before he marries or you and him WILL have arguments about his Mother.
How old is he? Is he mature enough to take a stand? If not, honey, I would put off the marriage until he has grown up.
You need to be alone to establish your own family.
2006-09-17 15:40:52 · answer #3 · answered by Harley 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No you are definetly not wrong and do not allow it to happen. Check out my profile on some of the questions I asked, I just got seperated from my wife of 12 years because of my mom in law. She made all these promises to get us to move in with her about 3 years ago and she broke them all, took over as the head of the household, took over and bought my kids while she could not pay any of the bills and I paid them all, said it was her house not ours until she dies, my wife became more of a daughter than a wife to me. It got so bad I left. Oh by the way did I mention that I built 2700 sqaure feet onto my mother in law house. It is heart breaking that my wife does not love me anymore....I tried to go back and she will not take me back, her mom has convinced her that I am horrible.....The bottom line.....STICK TO YOUR GUNS AND DO NOT DO IT....TRUST ME YOU WILL BE SETTING YOURSELF UP TO FAIL....take it from someone who is failing. Feel free to contact me if you need more advice, I do not want to see anyone go through what I went through. Again I will be out for a while this evening but e-mail me through the profile if you want you are right you are not marrying his mom you are marrying him. I felt the same way I married her and her mom and it did not work.
2006-09-17 16:27:00 · answer #4 · answered by jbrown280000 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Unless this is a situation of heritage and tradition...YOU ARE 100% right. How are you going to make a marriage with some other woman in your nest?Let alone his mama! Whatever is wrong with your man needs to be ironed out BEFORE you marry him!
2006-09-17 15:37:01 · answer #5 · answered by steelypen 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are absolutely correct. Stick to your guns!
P.S. I would also like to add that you may be marrying someone who is very needy, and that can become a pain sooner or later. Also, mama is going to cause a whole lot of problems for you two. Are you sure about this marriage?
2006-09-17 15:36:56 · answer #6 · answered by Christian93 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you are marrying a Mommy's boy this is what you can expect. Your problem is not with his mother, its with your fiance, he is choosing and will continue to choose his mother over you. Can you live the rest of your life like that .
2006-09-17 15:35:38 · answer #7 · answered by David P 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have you seen monster in law? well try and talk it out with her. Tell her that he is now married, he has a life of his own and he can visit her whenever he wants and he doesnt need her living with you and him.
2006-09-17 15:36:55 · answer #8 · answered by Someone 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong, you's need to have your own space.
Two ladies have different views and different generations.
You want to live separate and live happy and still be her
friend in a way. So tell your hubby it could injure your
relationship and you don't want that to happen.
2006-09-17 15:36:45 · answer #9 · answered by michelle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, why is she moving in with you? No, you don't need to be married to her, but she is still family. Be careful of how you talk to your husband, because I'm sure there are members in your family that he doesn't like. You don't want to hurt or offend anyone.
2006-09-17 15:38:22 · answer #10 · answered by Mrs. Waiting 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋