I have been divorced for 9 years and have 2 children. I am in a same sex relatationship with another woman and we have been together for 7 years, but dont live together. Recently she had a big row with my kids over something her daughter did, and now wont be in my house if they are here, but I'm expected to be happy at her house when her kids are there. She does mean the world to me but I feel lousy about how she treated my kids. We spend all our spare time and holidays together, but she cant see what shes doing. What do you think the future holds? We thought we would eventually live together once the children were off hand. Has anyone, even in a hetrosexual relationship had problems with their partner not accepting their children?
2006-09-17 07:38:38 · 17 answers · asked by Roothii 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I personally haven't been in this situation, but a few of my friends and relatives have. All I can say is that it has never turned out for the better when a partner cannot accept the other partner's children. Your children are a part of your life, and therefore, a part of you. Do you really want to be with someone if they can't accept your children? And what's more is that your children do not deserve to be outcast in any part of their mother's life. Talk to your partner and tell her how you feel about the situation, and if she can't accomodate you and your children being in her life cut your losses. Your partner is just that...a partner, they are in a sense, replaceable; there are many more fish in the sea. Your children are permanent, and they need you.
2006-09-17 07:50:01 · answer #1 · answered by bluearia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HI!
I read all of your question, and I have always felt if someone divorces and has children they should not mix another partner with the kids. The kids suffer. Divorce is traumatic for everyone and if there is a need to date, do it but do not bring another in the lives of the kids.
2006-09-17 07:42:11 · answer #2 · answered by -------- 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My g/f and I have 4 adult children between us. They all treat each of us with love and respect, but she is not their parent and I am not her kids parent. We don't cross that line. Our kids are also friendly with each other but don't have alot in common so aren't great friends or anything.
I think trying to maintain a relationship when your kids and your partner don't get along tears you apart too much to be viable. Your kids have a right to their mom until its time for them to go. I think you need to talk to your g/f and get her side of it, and then explain to her that you need to come to an agreement on how you will handle the kids because the relationship can't go on like this. You may lose her, but your kids have to come first if they are not adults. Good luck to you.
2006-09-17 07:45:55 · answer #3 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh expensive...you've gotten self belief in spite of you like, do in simple terms no longer tell human beings what God does or would not want... the certainty is you know with the aid of religion, what you have found out for your self and heaven forbid which you go against it. human beings have distinctive perspectives, even different the two committed and sensible christians have distinctive perspectives. you're the two good. This worldwide isn't appropriate and the christians residing in it are no longer appropriate and thank God He has made a approach so you might understand forgiveness.... unfold the affection and share your excitement and you're able to be able to help easy the way for others. in case you unfold hate and debate you have already lost. in my view i do no longer see that I extremely have something to assert to human beings in comparable intercourse relationships that i could no longer say to those in opposite intercourse relationships... all have fallen short.
2016-10-15 02:31:52 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay this is my opinion. Either way it's not going to work out I'm sorry to say only men/woman relationships are going to work. I suggest getting out of this relationship and find yourself a man. Yes there are @$$holes out there, but there are nice guys too! Get your life back! Just because your earlier marriage didn't work out does not mean you should give up on men! There are others out there. Hope you don't take any offense to this! Best of Luck and God Bless!
2006-09-17 08:27:42 · answer #5 · answered by Dispirited 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gay or not, step children and step parents are a minefield waiting to go off.
Do not let your children be treated badly. They will resent you for it. You can find another lover but your children will be with you until you are old!
Its such a tough question! I wish you all the best
2006-09-17 07:44:50 · answer #6 · answered by Nicola H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who's the adult here? Tell her to grow the f*ck up! She's not mature enough to be a mom, let alone be around your kids. You kids are your blood. Are you gonna throw them out with your morals too? You sound like a winner yourself.
2006-09-17 07:43:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship will crumble if this continues you must ne honest with her, say you love her and tell her how much she means to you. Or do it subtly drop hints etc. Or this is a bit drastic be off hand with her child do EXACTLYwhat she does and she should notice. Just keep telling her what she means to you.
2006-09-17 07:43:19 · answer #8 · answered by andrew c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have a step son that lives with my wife and i. we have 2 boys together. my stepson and i all we do is fight. he don't think he has to listen to me and i cant send him away. were his dads right were taking away ( i wish i could get hold of him and talk to him about it).
any way if you cant have your kids around then tell her her kids cant be around either it was their fault as much as your kids. and then if it has to be then move on.
your kids are blood she is water what is more important. her or your kids.
2006-09-17 07:49:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she does not want to be in your house when your kids are there, she is not worth knowing, you're children should always come first.
2006-09-17 07:43:36 · answer #10 · answered by thebigtombs 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋