so my roommate asked the other day if it would be ok to give her boyfriend a key to our appartment... I didn't really no how to say that I wasn't keen on the idea so I said "I guess"...that same day when he arrived he knocked then proceded to open the door with a key. Obivously she had given him one prior to asking if I was in agreement with this, and now more then ever I am starting to resent the fact that he has access to our home whenever he wants. Is there anything I can say to her about this without starting a fight? I'd really rather he didn't have a key, but I'm sure at this point its too late for that.
2006-09-17 02:25:05 · 18 answers · asked by m 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Even if you change the locks she will just have another key made for him.
Do you have a lease? Maybe the lease says you cannot give out extra keys? "Oh I am so sorry Tiffany, but the lease says we cannot give out extra keys. Could you please ask Roger for the key back? Gee I am so sorry about this.........etc."
2006-09-17 02:27:34 · answer #1 · answered by WendyD1999 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not talk to both of them together? Explain that this is your home too and you are uncomfortable right now with anyone else having the ability to just walk right in. At least he knocked before he came in using the key, that says something good about him. You can have this conversation calmly and without malice. Just a simple I am uncomfortable, why does he have to have a key, Is he moving in and splitting the rent 3 ways.....etc. That should help.
2006-09-17 02:29:38 · answer #2 · answered by Shawn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have said no but to salvage the situation you have now you will have to set some strict rules for how he may use that key. For example, he can't use the key when you are home or just whenever he wants. He can only use it for emergencies like she needs something from her apartment and you aren't there. Tell her you only agreed to it because you didn't think it was for regular use and you don't want him to have it if he is just going to come in and out like that.
2006-09-17 02:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by tenaciousd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its not to late.
Have a meeting with both of them at the same time.
Tell them you did not think it would be a problem, but after him coming over a few times, you realized that it makes you uncomfortable & you didn't know it would. Tell them you are sorry & that you don't want to hurt any ones feelings but that is how you feel. If they have any respect for you he will give the key back.
If they do not understand then you may have to move.
2006-09-17 03:02:51 · answer #4 · answered by Emptiness 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's certainly not too late to change this situation. Tell your roommate that at first you thought it would be okay for her boyfriend to have a key , but that now it really makes you uncomfortable. Ask her if it's really necessary for him to have one? Maybe if you see her side of it you won't mind it after all. But you both need to discuss this more and come to terms with it.
2006-09-17 02:30:56 · answer #5 · answered by rosecitylady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be time to find a new room mate- You can tell her you thought that you wanted him to have a key for back up purposes, like if you were both out of town or something so he could get the mail. Tell her flat out you are not comfortable with him coming and going as he pleases, and if she wants to share an apartment with him, then they need to move in together.
2006-09-17 02:28:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would ask her to talk about why he needs a key. Suppose while you were in the shower, he comes into the apartment and your roommate is gone, not only would it scare you, but it would be an invasion of your privacy. I would not allow him to have a key until I really got to know him.
2006-09-17 02:39:00 · answer #7 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not too late to change your mind. What she did was sneaky. Simply tell her you are uncomfortable with the situation and have decided he should not have a key. If she won't cooperate, you might think about moving when your lease is up. Sorry about your problem with your roommate, but stand your ground because it is your home too!
2006-09-17 02:30:04 · answer #8 · answered by Ms. G. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She was rude to even think abut given him a key since she does not live alone. If you don't feel comfortable with people not living in the apartment having a key to your place then say so.
2006-09-17 02:40:18 · answer #9 · answered by lady01love 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there,
I hope your friend is not the kind of girls who rush in her relation ship because its a big move for them unless they know each other so I guess the easiest solution to scare that what she did is a big mistake and she is moving so fast... Second , if she is rush and she really like the they step forward you gotta be honest with her .... just tell you thought it'll be fun but you really feel uncomfortable that he is around and you miss the fact the appartment..
don't mension that you knew she give him the before you agree unless she dosn't accept the nice way and before you mension it you gotta be sure that she did before from her boyfriend you'll probly think its impossible but boys tell they are like kid by this I'm sure he'll be out but I hope you don't have to
thank you....
2006-09-17 02:37:54 · answer #10 · answered by Dark angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋