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I need to build confidence badly.....if i can believe in myself then i know my life will be a whole lot better....so how do i go on about doing this and also eliminating the little shyness i have too in all areas of my life like sports and social settings and lastly having confidence in my abilities at school.....also how do i stop caring about what ppl think of me...and please dont just give the clichee answers just to get points like believe in yourself or screw them........please help me out here

2006-09-16 19:38:52 · 10 answers · asked by anonymous 27 4 in Social Science Psychology

10 answers

Confidence is not an easy thing to "learn" but you can become more confident, best way to do this is to start setting small goals and acceiving them , it builds confindence to accomplish small things, this makes way for much bigger things, as far a social situations you really just have to go into them with as little thought as possable, i mean if course think about what your doing and saying enoguh that you arent making an *** of yourself but sort of seperate yourself from the situation, when people say just "**** um who cares" thats actually really good advice, theres so many people out there that any few just DONT matter, if there going to judge you for things or not like you then forget them there not worth your time, havuing that attitude is the best way to attain confidence and social skills, if you are timid you will blunder and always seem skiddish to other people. speak with a strong voice and SOUND confident even if your feeling very imtimidated by the situation ,people will SEE you as confident and treat you as a confindent person and the next thing you knwo you WILL be confident because of that reinforcment.
were social creatures, there is no way you will ever truly not care about what others think, anyone who says they dont is full of crap, but you dont have to let people know that you care about what they think. its all about how people perceive you not even what you actually are.many of the people you might feel intimidated by might be very much like you but you dont even realize how much similar you are to them because you perceive THEM as being something greater then they are.
hope that at least sort of made sence, good luck to you.

2006-09-16 19:54:07 · answer #1 · answered by None 4 · 4 1

It takes practice and one has to build upon their successes.

If you're shy in social settings, then it's a good idea to have some topics to discuss. You don't have to go into a lot of details but know some key points. Read up on current events and follow up with a visit to some blogs. Second, the other person may feel just as uncomfortable. It's natural and just because two of you happen to meet, it's doesn't mean you'll hit it off. Instead just work on getting to know the other person better if they seem interesting, e.g. what they do, what their interests are, etc.

With sports, you just have to practice. It's not always fun, but I say work on the fundamentals. You cannot go wrong with doing that all the time. If you don't know what the fundamentals are, then ask someone like the coach or teacher. Maybe they can suggest some exercises. Furthermore, reading about your sport should help you develop your interest in it as well as inspire yourself to do more.

Finally, with school one has to study if they're not super smart and can rip off the homework in a flash. My rule of thumb is to get the difficult subjects done first. Then the easier ones and the subjects you are interested in will take care of itself.

What if you're really not interested in any subject? Well, try to find what interests you in those subjects. Surely, there has to be something. Even if you have talent in one particular area, the person who gets a well rounded education and exposed to many views will still have a leg up on you other things being equal.

2006-09-16 19:52:55 · answer #2 · answered by callahan 2 · 3 1

Confidence many times (especially for teens and people in their 20's) starts on the outside, not the inside. Especially in a culture like America that values youth & beauty. You need to work on your exterior package. Change something about yourself - your hair, your clothes, etc. Inner confidence usually comes later in life (30's, 40's, plus).

Since you mentioned sports, I am going to assume that you are a guy. So, becoming good at a sport is also another way to gain confidence (and friends/social status). If all the above fails, you could always become a "bad boy." People in general, and women especially, are always attracted to the "bad boy."

Oh, but stay in school and don't do drugs (not too cliche, was it?!).

2006-09-16 20:05:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

A lack of confidence is the need to be perfect. You need to tell yourself that you are good enough just the way you are. I bet you are a people pleaser. Some times you have to be yourself no matter what other people think. I hope this helps.

2006-09-16 19:56:32 · answer #4 · answered by d_guy67 2 · 1 1

self assurance comes with understanding your self, and liking your self and being genuine to who you're. You base your value of your self on your guy or woman opinion, not others' critiques. So, you look at your solid factors and you nicely known the failings you like approximately your self and you do issues and act in a manner that shows character and integrity and you're making a favorable impact on others so as which you understand your self. You do issues that build your shallowness, like conquering fears - and achieving targets. You pay attention on your guy or woman drum, save on with your guy or woman lead, make judgements and selections that are in alignment mutually with your values - you should make sparkling your values and encompass your self with people who make you sense solid, who assist you. yet maximum of all, you should discover ways to assist your self - no you will do those issues for you. It has to return from interior of. It takes perception and listening to your inner self and being observant and paying interest to what's happening around you and having the braveness to be you. do not enable your self be defined by ability of others - you be the single to confirm who you're.

2016-10-15 02:12:37 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Don't be afraid, all people make faults.
Face the world ,asking this question was already a good step.
Trey to make some "good" friends not bad friends who give you that feeling.
Have a good hobby and meet people with the same interests.

2006-09-16 20:02:04 · answer #6 · answered by Chantal D. 6 · 1 1

you know you have to think that you are the man other people you are takin to are nothing in front of you.if you will feel that way you will devolop confidence.

2006-09-16 20:14:54 · answer #7 · answered by cool k 2 · 1 1

you need to learn to love yourself first. you need to stay calm & focus on what you're doing. =)

2006-09-16 19:41:45 · answer #8 · answered by jv637 5 · 1 2

Just be yourself.

2006-09-16 19:45:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1 5

have faith on allah .

2006-09-16 19:40:55 · answer #10 · answered by Rimi 2 · 0 6

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