I lost the baby a year and a half ago. I was 21 at the time. Soon after, the father (my boyfriend) left me, which made the hurt worse. I don't have insurance. What can I do? I know I need help because of the way I'm feeling.
2006-09-16 16:14:53 · 14 answers · asked by chloekennedy7 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
find a support group in your area or try a local church. find someone to talk to.
i can't imagine the pain of losing a child....i'll say a prayer for you.
2006-09-16 16:17:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You'll never get fully over the pain of losing a close loved one, especially a child, and it's not expected that you do. It is OK to grieve, and there need be no time limit to your grief. Grieving is healthy and it helps you to rationalize your feelings. If you need someone to talk to, you might try calling a few therapists in your area to see if you can find one that offers grief counseling. Many therapists work on a sliding fee scale, and only charge what you can afford. There's also local county mental health clinics. I'm sorry for your loss. I wish you the best.
2006-09-16 23:26:40 · answer #2 · answered by Nate 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All good advise,but first know that it is OK to feel a lose. It is a normal process. When you were a child and you got hurt there was a lot of physical pain. Eventually the pain went away, you may always have a scar.But the emotion pain that still hurts will go away. And it does help to talk about it with someone that understands.
2006-09-16 23:35:25 · answer #3 · answered by always a friend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, believe me when I tell you that you are not alone. I have lost two babies in my life. The first time, I didn't even know I was pregnant. I was very young and had no time to even grasp the idea so it wasn't quite as difficult. but the second time, I was quite far along in my pregnancy and had purchased all the baby things.. chosen names.. and was so very happy and anxious.. and then there was no baby. It took a very very long time for me to realise that I was not meant to have that child. As difficult as that is, I look back and realise that the time and the circumstances were just not right. It has been more than 30 years since that loss, but I still think about it sometimes. I have since had 3 healthy children. They are gifts from heaven, each one of them.. but there will always be that wee soul that was never in my care. I will always think about it, but I will always know that he or she sits with God as it was obviously meant to be. Please talk with someone, Dear.. go to your minister.. any minister.. a friend.. a loved one.. someone you trust to be open and caring of your feelings.. and talk it through. It is perfectly fine to mourn the loss of your baby.. it is absolutely right to feel sad and lost, but there comes a time when you must put it in it's proper perspective and move on with your life. Your baby would never want you to stay this sad for so long. Good luck to you, Dear.
2006-09-16 23:46:33 · answer #4 · answered by Nancy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry. How difficult that is for you. If you can't afford counseling, have you tried to read a book on grief? Also, have you tried a local church? A lot of churches offer counseling for free, or the pastor will for free. Also try to find a support group for grief in your area (or start one of your own). See if you can't find some people who are going through the same thing.
2006-09-16 23:20:05 · answer #5 · answered by mountain_laurel1183 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
all of these answers are good. unfortunately there is no fix for your pain, only time will heal this one and its a burden for anyone who has lost a loved one. if you read one thing here it's that your life is still here and since there are no second chances, and you cant get back time try to make the best of what you have now. spend alot of time with friends family and loved ones. DO discuss your feeling bringing them in the open will definitley lighten the load
2006-09-16 23:26:24 · answer #6 · answered by steevo 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I dont think you will ever really forget.If you dont have any insurance us your outside resources. Church talk to your pastor, look in the paper for community events dealing with related topics, talk to your DR, go to social services an ask them. This is always are hard subject the loss of a child not every one experiences but the ones who do have a hard time with it. My neighbor lady lost her child to crib death 10 years ago and still talks about it and still has tears in her eyes every time.
2006-09-16 23:21:37 · answer #7 · answered by stitch1 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
look online for discussion boards with other women who have lost their babies, it'll probably make you feel better talkin with someone who has went through the same thing. My friend went to a local organization with other mothers who lost their babies and that helped her out a lot
2006-09-16 23:40:29 · answer #8 · answered by peachez082 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that you will get "over it" but sounds like you are stuck in a depression and can't get out of it. May need see a therapist or go to your doc and see if you need antidepressant to help you over this hump. God Bless You
2006-09-16 23:25:38 · answer #9 · answered by denise f 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your baby was born and then pasted away, you could put a picture of him/her on the wall or your dresser so that you can see your baby everyday, as if you never lost them at all.
2006-09-16 23:50:46 · answer #10 · answered by asprinfree_braindamage_please 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry this happened to you. You are right, you will need help because you need to be able to move on....not forget, but move ahead. Go to a medical doctor first, that visit will cost, but do that first, tell him your situation, and that you are financially unable to seek counseling. He may be able to suggest a free clinic.
Also Google your loss and find message boards. and chat rooms where you can share and compare what you are going through.
2006-09-16 23:28:49 · answer #11 · answered by chris 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋