Ok, so im 13, a couple months ago i looked at porn, and now i am scared that i am bi. First of all i dont want to be bi, i have a boyfriend, and i love boys, but its like sometime i think about having sex with girls, or i think about girls having sex and I HATE HAVING THISE THOUGHTS. I think that that are so wrong, My mom says its just a phase, and she said if you liked girls, you would like your friends, and I DO NOT like my friiends, i just like them as friends, I really think that i am not bi, and it is my decision too. But i am making myself CRAZY with these thoughts, I HATE THEM!!!! I dont want to have sex with a girl or a relationship, but i think about having sex with them but i hate IT!!! Can someine help me, Has anyone ever had this problem, if u did can i email you sometime, and mabey you clould help me???
2006-09-16 12:33:15 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Don't worry about those thoughts. You shouldn't take them too seriously. You just had a glimpse of something different and that started a curiosity. If they repulse you, instead of intrigue, they you don't really have a desire to be with girls. Try thinking of them as silly thoughts, not as serious thoughts. I know how you feel, because similar thoughts have gone through my mind, and I know I'll never go gay (I'm a man). They don't happen often and I'm repulsed, but I just laugh them off because I know I love women too much. I know I want to be with someone of the opposite sex. Also, you're at that age where your hormones corrupt your thoughts, and in a couple of years your body should calm down. So, hang in there and don't put too much belief into those thoughts or you'll think too much about them. I hope I've helped you and I want to apologize for not leaving my e-mail address because I feel uncomfortable doing so. But remember, if you do have those thoughts, you don't HAVE to be with a girl. That they are just silly thoughts and you would rather be with a boy.
2006-09-16 13:21:33 · answer #1 · answered by einstein's firecracker 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Amber, I had written a whole page for you and some how it vanished into thin air. I just want you to know that I am sad that you were exposed to porn and now have a whole slew of unsure feelings going on. I am willing to talk with you more. You are more than welcomed to email me. I do know that it is important for you to respect your feelings. We have all been given a sense of what is right and wrong, a conscience if you will, and if you hate those thoughts it ok. You are not bi I can assure you. Look forward to hearing from you.
2006-09-16 19:54:04 · answer #2 · answered by Yodawise 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are bi, but I hope you realize the effect that just looking at porn has. Porn is not natural, it shows raw sex in the most unhealthy ways. It is degrading to women and girls. The girls who pose for these are often treated badly.
When you start having thoughts these thoughts, force yourself into a more pleasant thought. Plan ahead what you are going to concentrate on to get these thoughts out of your head, and please, for your own sake, do not be sexually active with your boyfriend either. There is too much responsibility and too many dangers involved to carry that baggage at such a young age. Stay away from sexually charged books, movies, and conversation (Except with your parents, then for information purposes.)
Do not allow this to make you feel crazy. Let yourself learn a lesson, and avoid these situations in the future.
2006-09-16 23:27:10 · answer #3 · answered by mamasheilag 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hey, I'm 67 and I still think about having sex with other men. I think just about everyone imagines having sex with one of their own sex and it does not make you bi. Having sex with males and females makes one bi, not our thoughts. You will go through many phases in your life. Worrying about them all will drive you crazy, so just enjoy your thoughts and your life.
2006-09-16 19:41:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
where did you find the porn???you're still a young girl who should be thinking about romance or a first kiss!!!!did you tell your mom that you were reading porn???and she allowed it???this is why young girls get pregnant or some disease!!!sex is for mature people who can deal with these problems!!!you're having these thoughts because you are too young for porn and too young for sex and too young to know if you like girls or boys!!!stick to reading your lessons that will help you!!!you have enough growing up to do before you even think about sex!!!
2006-09-16 19:48:38 · answer #5 · answered by ....FED UP............ 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well ... if you don't want to have sex with a girl, I guess you're not bisexual.
Bisexual means you get turned on by (ie. want to have sex with) people either male or female.
This is a very complex area and many people would argue about whether turned on by is the same as wanting to have sex with etc.
I think your boyfriend would be very happy that you have thoughts about girls having sex.
I think you should relax about it. You seem a little stressed out by it. If you relax, you might find that the thoughts that you find intrusive will settle down and go away.
My daughter has tried to shock me by telling me about how she is bisexual. She went to the mall with this female friend of hers. She was 13 at the time and so I didn't let this faze me and she has turned out to be very heterosexual (uncomfortably so for me whenever her bf is about *fume*).
My own experience was more of a fleeting joke thing. I was driving along and saw a new billboard (this was years ago) displaying a pair of nice smooth legs. I thought "Mmmm - nice legs" only to recoil in horror as I turned the corner to find that they belonged to a prominent olympic swimmer (male).
So he's got nice legs. (Smooth!)
I don't want to have sex with him *shudders*
So chill! It'll sort itself out.
Be nice to yourself and be comfortable with yourself. Let yourself find out about yourself.
Cheers!
2006-09-16 19:41:40 · answer #6 · answered by Orinoco 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry it is probably just a phase and it is quite common. You might even get a crush on a particular girl but it is just a passing phase because of your active hormones.
2006-09-16 19:42:02 · answer #7 · answered by Gone fishin' 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They're right, it is quite normal. Not to mention that girls' bodies are much more attractive to look at than a males (no offense, men, but it's true). I'm prefectly straight, and am very much in love with my man, and I can tell you this. No problem.
2006-09-16 19:39:27 · answer #8 · answered by kurokoneko86 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 13 the most you can enjoy is masturbate. Leave other options to a later date say when you are 16 or over
2006-09-17 08:59:02 · answer #9 · answered by Gopal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don' t panic you are just growing up and discovering sexuality. just relax and don't try and grow up too quick. It takes time to discover who you are. There will be lots of 13 year olds out there having the same thoughts you are.
2006-09-16 19:40:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋