i have my demons, my problems, etc. let's not talk about that because I don't want to be judged on them. I walked to high street today and ate some KFC and then went to goodwill and bought two t-shirts. as i left, a black guy was walking toward me. i see many black and white and other ethnic guys walking around but i automatically assumed that this guy is good looking but there is something wrong with him. call it intution. he only verified my suspicions by stopping me and saying "hey brother, can i pleasse as you for a favor?". he was very courteous and he put a lot of energy behind his pleading. but after glancing him in the eyes i decided to stick with my philosophy and walk away. i mean he is feeding into that stereotype of black guys always asking strangers for stuff. i knew it was going to be money. there is no reason why a grown strong and healthy man should ask someone, especially someone low down on the totem pole for a favor.
2006-09-16 09:22:17 · 30 answers · asked by ISOBESTANSWERS 2 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
i lived on the streets for 10 months and didnt' bother anyone, tried to do it myself, lived on $100 a month, and ate out of trashcans. i turned to the government for assistance. why can't he? i just dont agree stopping people and asking them for favors and it makes it look bad when black people do it. of course he automatically treated me like i was a bad person for not stopping to see what he needed. maybe we are all brothers, but i just dont know about what he is doing. i cant go anywhere in columbus without being accosted by a black person asking for something. campus, grocery store, goodwill, downtown.. it sucks. i've seen guys in cars get stopped by a random black guy asking if "big dog, can you spare some change"? i think its a disgrace but moments like this make me wonder if i am a bad person
2006-09-16 09:24:51 · update #1
im getting a lot of responses that it is bad because he was black. my defense is that if a whole bunch of white guys were doing it it would bother me too. i mean i'm half asian and half white but i dont want to feed into this race thing. i think these responses about him being black are very not thought out. im just saying more black people do it then whites. and i think blacks are racist too. if he was white, i would have probably got mad at him. he he was someone that i thought looked cool, like a would be buddy, i would have asked what the problem was and help him. but just because he was courteous doesnt mean he was.. and blacks are abusing this race thing by pissing on people because they dont stop and ask them what the favor is.
2006-09-16 09:29:07 · update #2
and finally i am judgemental about black people who are "hard on their luck" or act different because i believe in this society we sould try to share a similar responsible culture. does that make me racist? i hope not. but the simple fact is that from experience i know if i took the time to stop a BLACK guy and say "sorry no" he would have tried a different approach and kept trying. plus they are natural sales people so they will keep working on you making you feel bad because your not giving in to them. one time i invited a black guy to my house and it became stressful because every five minutes he kept bringing up money. first it was i need food. then it was like i need beer. then it was like i need a toothbrush. and i did it. and the end result was that hey robbed me at knifepoint with a knife he gave me and said "i played him like a biotch" and robbed me for $250. im sorry i brought black into this but im telling you how it is. stop avoiding race and accept black do it
2006-09-16 09:41:29 · update #3
wow. youre mean
2006-09-16 09:24:06 · answer #1 · answered by rk_927 2 · 2⤊ 4⤋
No, you're not a bad person because you ignored this person. The fact that he was black should have nothing to do with it. Some homeless people are black, some are white.
I've lived and worked in Chicago and Philadelphia and walked to work in both cities. Every day for years I passed an average of five homeless people each way all asking for something, some in more creative ways than others. You can't stop and give something to everyone every time.
After a while you get to know every technique the more creative homeless people use - "Can I ask you a question?" "Excuse me, can you tell me...?" "Can I ask you a favor?" "I just need money for a train ticket to get back to the suburbs." etc. I've seen this from people of all colors.
After a while you get a real vibe from people - where they are standing on the sidewalk, how they are dressed, the way they come up to you, etc. You know who these people are going to be.
I do the same thing you do, I walk away. You feel incredibly uncomfortable and used if you stop and listen to their story and then give them some money. I'd rather (and I have) give money to a homeless person who is less intrusively sitting there asking people in general for spare change (and not confronting individual people).
It's very uncomfortable in general to be confronted and feel as if you're being lied to and conned. Then you feel somewhat guilty because the person is homeless. So it's natural to just walk away.
But you shouldn't just assume that this is something black people do. Change that to just homeless people. I've seen white homeless people do exactly the same thing. If you think only black homeless people do this, then you'll get trapped unexpectely one day by a white homeless person.
2006-09-16 16:37:37 · answer #2 · answered by Jimmy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand what you are saying. Here in K.C. I work downtown and I see what you are saying all the time. What you are talking about is not a rasist thing but more of a begging thing. I too get tired of the pan-handeling and hearing "can you spot me some money so I can.......... Just to add to your story at the shop we also get crack- whores that come around. It's not a color thing because I see people of all races comming around. (it probally does not help that there is a soup kitchen down the street) One other part that you did not mention are the ones that come in and want to sell you something. Sometimes it 's new stuff tools and other things. Tell me this, are you a bad person for bying something that you know is stolen from one of these people? Keep in mind that an item might be as much as 80 percent less that in a store. Good, bad, or indiferent you were probally smart to walk away. You survived the encounter and in the greater scheme of things, isn't that the most imprtant thing? btw it was a very good question.
2006-09-16 10:12:45 · answer #3 · answered by MAD MEL 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you have been there, then you must know how it feels to be ignored by someone. If you felt it was right what you have done then no one can change your mind. I feel in your words that you feared the worse but you weren't certain that it was going to be the worst.
You are human and we all make mistakes and you are lucky to have that little voice. But I don't really know what to say really to you. This isn't a case of black or white, it is a case of choice.
You feel disordered I think, you haven't settled if it was the right thing to do or not. Think about this: lets say he did ask for money what would you have done???
Good luck sir. Love angel**
2006-09-16 21:49:13 · answer #4 · answered by Miss Sunshine Angle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean,but don't worry about. We, brazilian people, mainly northeasten, are considered to be friendly, helpful,etc... bullshit... there's a very increase of violence, corruption that sometimes we are tired of all stuff. Negligence, lack of attention from the government have made this with us and they're far from doing anything, so it's hard to be helpful with someone you don't know even though the poor whos's walking around the streets with no way home, 'cause no one wants to take risk anymore.
I'm even with my conscience(yes, it's a matter of it), I help people when I can do it and this makes me comfortable...in the end is not a matter of racism but lack of security.
Yes, I'm Christian, but not responsible for all the troubles in the world, so let the men of authority on that be the one to deal with.
2006-09-17 05:13:33 · answer #5 · answered by rossanadebora 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think because of your past experiences( life on the street) you shouldn't be put down for not helping someone.
However you should also dignify him by kindly telling him that you cannot help.
To continue walking, and ignore someone is like telling someone that you feel they do not exist, it is demoralizing, and dehumanizing, and should never be done, that is someone's child, someone's brother, someone's father perhaps that need help, always speak to someone with the respect you wish others treated you.
If everyone in the world did this there would be a lot less problems
2006-09-16 09:38:09 · answer #6 · answered by babacuz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You keep referring to the fact that he was "black"....so I must assume that this had something to do with your action.
Walking away from someone who is begging, tho harsh, has become the norm in large metropolitan centres. The volumes of people, legitimately & not, begging for money has become overwelming.
It wouldn't have taken you any extra effort to politely say "sorry, no"....but to just walk away is rather rude and uncalled for. If your action was prompted due to the fact that the guy was black...you might want to have a closer look at what makes you tick.
Bad? Probably not.......but not good either. Sorry!
Have a nice day.
2006-09-16 09:36:18 · answer #7 · answered by Canadian Ken 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well.... i'm not so sure if this has anything to do with this guy's ethnicity but rather in the fact that you don't know him and he doesn't know you and he opens with 'can you do me a favor'. i think the tone he approached you with seemed questionable and i don't find your response odd at all. if this guy actually needed help he would have said so - and not started by asking you for a favor. you need to trust your instincts and if you think somebody is trying to manipulate you than you're perfectly right to walk away. if someone truly needs help you sound intelligent enough to detect that and if possible you'd probably help them. this part of town sounds a little down and out - for various reasons people may not have funds and are looking to get some - be mindful and take care.
2006-09-16 09:28:42 · answer #8 · answered by jeejee 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It is very OK to be confused. We only start thinking when we are not sure whether we did something right or not.
Lots of people there to cheer you up.
The only person that has to find out what to do next is you
and next time you may still make a mistake by being too kind or too harsh.
Life is like walking on a razors edge. Follow your heart.
2006-09-16 12:25:15 · answer #9 · answered by nischal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not a bad person, I turn down people who ask me for money all the time. If I had money to give, I wouldn't trying to work all week long, those guys can do something to get paid, even if it's only raking yards or cutting someones grass. If you are a bad person, will I must be the devil, because I'm not giving them nothing.
2006-09-16 09:34:46 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel uncomfortable around people who ask others for help. I am a strong believer in you get what you fight for. It is up to you to make a life for yourself and what that life consists on is up to you. If you make a choice to be someone that begs - then you will get rejection on a daily basis - I have an idea get a job as a sales person - rejection must come easy for you. As far as the black or white thing - no need to mention color at all - there are several white beggers in the world as well.
2006-09-16 09:28:09 · answer #11 · answered by LaDonna J 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋