My husband had a huge porn addiction. It was really rediculous. He has the stuff everywhere. He would spend hours looking at it on the net and magazines everywhere and movies.. ect. He puts down anyone who does not look like those girls. He calls people fat, skinny ect ect.. if they look like a magazine girl they were hot. I was constantly trying to loose weight and keep- fit but I am in my late 30's. I dont think I look bad but it was never good enough. I got tired of trying to compete with air brushed implanted women with wigs. How does this happen? How do guys get so immersed and addic ted to this stuff?
2006-09-16 07:43:26 · 37 answers · asked by Lynnette G 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well his addiction to porn is not the problem here but the fact that he puts you down and compares you with porn girls. Most men love porn but they dont call they wives fat, I mean no man in right mind would even consider calling his wife fat, other than that porn is good for relationships it spices things up
2006-09-16 07:47:11 · answer #1 · answered by kevin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-07-19 01:16:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you loose the weight? You should lose weight instead. Too bad it was rediculous, I guess that's better than bluediculous.
Look, the reason we are all here is because men have an extremely strong sex drive. It's hard wired. Porn takes advantage of that. It's mean for him to compare you to that.
The girls in porn never age, they just keep getting younger ones, so it's not fair to compare. Plus, I bet he's no prize. I don't understand why women are confused and act like it's only their guy that likes porn. He takes it too far when he verbalizes his thoughts though.
2006-09-16 07:50:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U asked a lot of good questions, but i'm surpriseed you didn't ask the obvious which would be "how do i help him stop?" cause that would be most healthiest for him, and your relationship.
i will address that question:
one thing to do is to place photograps of you, him, you and him together, pictures of your children, family pictures, all next to where his porn addiction is.
for example, if he's watching porn on the computer, make sure you put family pictures aaaall around the computer. if he is remotely religious at all, also put jesus pictures there too. tell him, he cannot remove them.
he should start to feel shameful when he looks at porn and his "family" and "god" is watching
also, tell him and you should know that
PORN IS NOT AN ADDICTION BUT A CHOICE.
a lot of people would say "but it's an addiction": meaning, it's an addiction, it has control of me and i have no control over it, therefore i can't change.
but it's not an addiction, it's a choice.
and basically, bluntly put, your husband is choosing porn over his family.
please talk to him and tell him that porn is not an addiction but a choice. ask him if he'd rather have his porn of his family. you may have to give him an ultimateum, especially if you have kids...
trust me, that's the oldest trick in the book, to call something an addiction. because when you do that, you can throw your hands up and say "it's an addiction, i have no control over it".
it is not an addiction
it is a conscious choice he is making every day.
family or porn, family or porn.
2006-09-16 07:49:41 · answer #4 · answered by chapped lips 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
sometimes when a person doesn't have a gf/orb/f for a long period of time like a couple yrs or so...and haven't had a sex partner besides themselves for a long time...porn takes the place of intimacy...some people tho may have a hard time breaking the habit of watching porn because they have gotten used to it for so long....it should Never take the place of a real relationship but maybe some people feel more secure knowing that porn will always be there and thier g/f or b/f may not.
I used to have a few in the closet..i think i still might...i haven't looked at them in a long long time
also I know a few women who have some stashed away so i don't believe it's just a man thing
2006-09-16 07:53:56 · answer #5 · answered by chefzilla65 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's selfishness. My dad was/is(?) a porn addict. He was unsatisfied with what my mom offered in bed. If he had actually worked with her and loved her more, I think they would still be married today. I'm not a naturally aggressive person, sexually, but my husband has been very good at loving me and making me feel sexy. He isn't into porn at all, he thinks it's stupid. My husband says porn is the lazy-man's sex. He gets all his gratification without the work. I'm guessing you guys have problems other then his porn addiction. You might want to look into seeing a sex or marriage councilor.
2006-09-16 07:47:53 · answer #6 · answered by Luckiest_Wife_EVER 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not only men who struggle with this addiction. It's just like every addiction, the more you get, the more you want. If you are not in treatment then you are really out of luck. It will just continuosly progress, costing more money, more time, more real relationships with real people. I am sure he won't be able to think about this clearly until he has a little recovery. My heart goes out to you. This is not about you or your deficiencies. It is about HIS sickness. Believe me he would be the same no matter how you look.
2006-09-17 22:00:31 · answer #7 · answered by Sandra W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might be that he wants someone like that and be a slut like the women in those movies I agree it's ridiculous that men become addicted to porn my guess would be that he is fantasizing that he is the man in the porn movie and he's doin the woman in it and with all due respect if he cant see what he has at home then he's an @$$ hole
2006-09-16 07:54:20 · answer #8 · answered by rita morales 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. men like porn. evolution has made men have the compulary urge to spread their seed. its how the world got populated and our species stayed alive. now, however, we have a society that says a man is a "player" if he does this.. so instead of going against society, men turn to porn to release their needs. be happy he is finding a safe alternative (masturbation) instead of hookers, workmates, etc and bringing STDs home to you.
2. get online and do a little research of your own. look up "retouched photos before and after" and see what pictures of models look like BEFORE they hit the magazines. it will make you feel better and give him a much needed dose of reality.
3. if it continues and really bothers you that much, seek marital counciling and see if you can continue to be in this relationship or if it is time for you two to go your seperate ways.
2006-09-16 07:50:12 · answer #9 · answered by .jess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is obssesed with what society tells him are ideal women. The thought of sticking his dick (= power) into what for him is perfection has gotten the best of him. Men want to have sex. It is what keeps animals from dying out. Unfortunaly he needs a better hobbie. I love porn but I would much rather make sweet love to my girlfriend then rub out to a movie.
Please don't make yourself miserable trying to keep up with his misguided ideals. If you both want to put the time in he can get over this. If not...... start cheeting on him. J/K
2006-09-16 07:55:18 · answer #10 · answered by Paul P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋