My daughter & grandson do not need me so much anymore. Now I walk the dog and make sure the house is secure (I come over for that!) They have learned to count on that! We are talking about my 30 yr old daughter and 12 yr old grandson. I have looked into moving to Hawaii (which is a 5.5 hr plane ride) I want to make sure I am not betraying my child and grandson. What's a grandma to do? Will they forget me and will I lose them forever? It's very expensive to get there. When my grandson was liittler we were closely involved and basically a unit. Now I think I can split (as we used to say) and they won't feel abandoned by me, will they? I want to see whatever I can, I have things to do out there!!! If I don't go, I will just be denying my God and getting old at home, and quickly. But what if I die somewhere else? I'm healthy and I do turn my health and plans over to Jesus Christ but I have never been in a position of leaving my best people behind. How do I present this?
2006-09-16 06:37:48 · 11 answers · asked by trees 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hi Nana , I am 56 yo male and i say that your time to live is NOW. Go live as you please and make yourself happy.
2006-09-16 06:44:32 · answer #1 · answered by blondguy92 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you could schedule some trips for yourself and see how it goes.
If you are going to move, give them ample notice so they can find another dog-walker. Sit them down and explain to them just what you put here.
As far as dying someplace else, write a will that states if you should die somewhere else, your remains are to be shipped home for burial. And wherever you move, make friends and acquaintances so someone notices if you get sick and/or pass on. Also, you will need relationships to compensate for the lack of company of your daughter and grandson.
In the meantime, you gave 12 years to your daughter and grandson. They should be able to stand on their own feet now. Tell them you will always be there for them, emotionally, but you have things you want to do in life. The great thing about e-mail, cellphones, etc. is you can keep in touch almost anywhere you go. You can still be a part of their lives!
2006-09-16 06:45:57 · answer #2 · answered by Stimpy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well that's hard, but the change in your grandson had to come, it's always like that, they're growing up and start their own life.
I was just in the same position but with a husband too, and we decided to stay put. We have our own life too, I don't mind doing little things for my daughter and girls, but I told them we need our space and are not on back and call. If I was single I would have been gone, depending on the money I'd keep my residence and travel back and forth every six months. But you live only once and of you're financially able to do what you want, go for it,
Just let them know that you love them but the time has come to look a bit after yourself. If the have any sense and are not egotistical they'll understand.
2006-09-16 06:45:45 · answer #3 · answered by Mightymo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a 57 year old Nanna. I am currently taking care of my Dad and my Aunt and on occasion still help my Daughter with her children.
I say, if you have the funds to split, then Go Girl! Maybe you should visit Hawaii, before moving there, I have heard that it is a very expensive place to live. If you have it in your heart to travel, then travel. You could live right where you live and travel .
If you are wanting to move, you have your children raised. Do something nice for yourself!! Your family knows that you Love them. Someday your Daughter could be in the same boat.
2006-09-16 07:07:30 · answer #4 · answered by kayboff 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your daughter and grandson plainly that grandma needs to live! They are old enough to look after themselves and it is your time in life to discover new things. You can keep in touch using a webcam, the internet, or just plain old writing. Start thinking about yourself--go on and LIVE!
2006-09-16 06:49:04 · answer #5 · answered by Miss J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do you have to move to travel? I would love to travel but I would still keep my home base close to my children. Even at 30 your daughter will still miss you and if you move that far away and she can't afford to travel to see you the relationship that you have will change. You also have to take into consideration what happens if you ever become ill and she can't afford to travel to come and see you, God is everywhere all around us, he does not ask us to move to Hawaii.
2006-09-16 06:44:02 · answer #6 · answered by oldmomma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say exactly the way you did here. Let her know what you would like to do, and tell her about your worries. How long will you be travelling? Would you be missing birthdays and Christmas? If you're not involved in their everyday lives, then it would probably not bother them. But it might bother them and they would definitely miss you if you weren't present at Christmas.
2006-09-16 06:53:11 · answer #7 · answered by Mommy2Liam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the heck with jesus...........go to hawaii and get yo wrinkled self a tan grammy!!!!!!!!! u deserve it!!!!
2006-09-16 06:59:45 · answer #8 · answered by Shnitzel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go for it.
2006-09-16 06:42:16 · answer #9 · answered by Unknown 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go nana go
2006-09-16 06:39:58 · answer #10 · answered by gabby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋