I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for a year and a half, at the beginning it was great but then he lost my trust about 6months into the relationship by disguising a girls number in his phone and secretly hanging out with her while i was at work, he claimed they were friends and all they did was eat pizza and watch a movie together, i truely love him but after that my trust was gone, we broke up for about 2 months and now are trying to get back together but he told me he is going to hide his phone from me until he sees if i am going to be genuine? like basically making it seem like i am the one who needs to change i found his secret hiding spot for his phone last night in his bathroom drawer and it made me feel like sh*t, he has been working out every day which he never used to , he is different....how do you know if you should move on for sure even if you love the person sooo much?
please help
2006-09-16 06:04:29 · 19 answers · asked by KV 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Move on. Anyone who feels he has to hide things from you is not being totally open and honest. Once the trust is gone, there really isn't a relationship left to build on. And for him to turn the tables on you and imply that you weren't being 'genuine'? Sounds like a guilty conscience, doesn't it? And you say he has changed? I think you already know your answer, girl - he is a player looking to move on, if he hasn't done so already. For the sake of your dignity - run like hell. Your heart will mend and eventually thank you.
2006-09-16 06:15:45 · answer #1 · answered by oscarschic 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah I'd hit the road if I were you. It's either that or have him leave you first, I'd rush to make the first move and walk away with my pride. Stick to your guns. Shoot, if she was only a friend why didn't he tell you about it or invite you along? He must think you're that dumb, obviously you're not.
And I really like how he tried to turn the tables on you like you were being snoopy. He thought he was being clever by going on the offensive (or is that DEfensive). Well it didn't work now did it. You've been one step ahead of him all the way, might as well get out first too. Sigh, when will these guys learn we women are not easily tricked. Sometimes I think it's good that men are so dumb they haven't figured that out yet. It means we will always know what they're up to.
Linda
2006-09-16 13:11:57 · answer #2 · answered by Linda 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is VERY immature and needs to grow up. Personally if someone did that to me I would move on. But I am not you and I do not know what kind of state you are in, if you are feeling vulnerable right now it is possible that you will want to stay with him but I wouldn't he is the one that made the mistake and for him to tell you that he is going to "hide" his phone until he knows that "you" are genuine. I would be putting my foot down and telling him that I want "him" to show me that he is genuine and f*ck the phone sh*t I want proof that you are serious about this relationship or I am moving on!!!!!!!! Stand up, be confident and have self esteem and self worth, aren't you worth that?
2006-09-16 13:10:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey I'm from the old school and I TRULY believe when their is no trust. Their is nothing and him still hiding the phone from you should let you know that he's not being honest to you. And it's something going on with him and this girl. If you wanna be sure pray about the matter ask the lord to reveil it to you he will.
2006-09-16 13:27:43 · answer #4 · answered by tessie35 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been the other girl just eating pizza at first later he is divorcing and living with me lol. he might feel he has to give you a chance because you have history and it will make him look like he was cheating all along... but he has a "plan b" now so he is just waiting for you to mess up.. you should move on... mentally he has already you just need to let go.
2006-09-16 13:15:12 · answer #5 · answered by mizsinister 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like he is being secretive and a little immature. Once someone loses your trust it's really hard to continue on and have a healthy relationship with that person. You'll always be wondering if they are being honest with you or hiding things. I would be careful about becoming involved again with anyone who has not proven to be trustworthy in the past.
2006-09-16 13:11:15 · answer #6 · answered by skahermit 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Trust your gut feeling and heart. It sounds to me like youve already made up your mind to move on. Obviously this guy just wants you around when he wants you and will lie to you to obtain whatever he wants and is not ready to be in a serious relationship. Youre basically in a one sided relationship and these never work as youre finding out. Hes set in his ways and wont change but is blaming you for everything. Its time for you to move on and find someone who will love only you and treat you like a real woman. Good luck
2006-09-16 13:15:25 · answer #7 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to move on with your life. This guy isn't gonna change. Why in the world does he have to hide his phone from you? There must be something he doesn't want you to see. And if you guys are having this much trouble now, it isn't gonna get any better.
2006-09-16 13:11:07 · answer #8 · answered by Carrie! 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should have move on after that 6 month period when you found out about that girl,trust isn't freely given,its earned.In his history,he has severe issues, why make them yours,after he made it appear that ,it was "you", that would have ,iced the cake,Sounds like a player without a conscience.Treat him like a rabid dog,stay away !!!
2006-09-16 13:15:34 · answer #9 · answered by Tinkerbelle 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In this case I would definitely move on. Sounds like to me he doesn't resemble the person you loved in the first place.
2006-09-16 13:38:03 · answer #10 · answered by inluvwshana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋