She is 17 and her boyfriend is 23.Yes I know what your thinking and older guy and a younger girl.He's my friend to and seems to be a good guy,But u never know.She went to planned parenthood today and found out shes 6weeks pregnant.Shes pretty against abortion.But shes to young has no job and hasnt even finished high school, her and her boyfriend havnt even known eachother for a year.I told her to really think about it.I told her that no matter what her decision i will be there for her.Her and I decided to post this question-please help up and only serious answers please.
2006-09-15 20:34:00 · 21 answers · asked by scorpio_hyna707 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
May God give her good spirit to fight for herself and her baby. All the best and Congratualtions. Remember one thing she is below 18 yrs and without any job. She has to go long way , boost her morale and support her as much as you can till she will start work alone. I know its very difficult but friends like you will definately support her. Take care her all check up periodically. Never miss any of tests required during pregnancy. A gyno will guide you.
2006-09-15 20:43:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well now that you've said the "A" word they're all going to come out of the woodwork with heartfelt pleas of "don't kill your baby" and pages of cut and paste links on the horrors of you know what. Thing is though, she is an older teen, will be nearly 18 when the baby is born and the father is older. Legalities of a 17 y/o with a 23 y/o aside, perhaps they are old enough and mature enough to have that baby.
But if she's only 6 wks pregnant? Well you say she's against abortion so it seems "what she should do" and "what she will do" may not be the same thing. Anyway, bottom line is, only she (and her boyfriend) and perhaps their families are the only ones who can make the decision on what to do. As her friend you really have little influence. But it's early enough that her options are still open.
2006-09-15 20:38:02 · answer #2 · answered by BabyRN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I also had a friend in a very similar situation. You would be amazed how much people could accomplish when they put their minds to it. If she truly is very much against abortion, or it just doesn't seem right for her, she can make it work. My friend was a heavy pot and ciggarette smoker, not to mention drinker. She quit all of the above worked a full time job until she had the baby and made it work all without anybody else. She is now married and has another one on the way. And this is years later. My sister went through something similar also. People have a way of making it work. Assure her she will be okay, she has been blessed, and even though she is young if she chooses to have the baby, there should be nothing in her life she is more proud of. And I think and have seen that when people take that outlook their parents often follow suit.... even though it sometimes takes them a little longer.
2006-09-15 20:51:51 · answer #3 · answered by neon49 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend went through the same thing when she was that age. I can't tell you what your friend should do, but I can tell you what my friend did. She was also against abortion, but she didnt rule it out immediately. She talked to her parents and her boyfriend and they agreed to help support her and the baby. She ended up dropping out of high school, but she went back when the baby was a year old and got her diploma. She is still with the father and is now taking classes at the community college nearby. It's a hard life for a while, but it is doable if your friend decides to keep the baby. No matter what she decides to do, she needs to be open and honest with her boyfriend and her family and make sure she considers all options carefully before making any decisions. And for you, it's good you'll be with her through this because it's an emotional time and she's going to need her friends.
2006-09-15 20:41:49 · answer #4 · answered by kaizee21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This answer hits close to home as I got pregnant at 16. I gave up my baby for adoption as I, too, didn't want an abortion and couldn't give a child a stable home. My boyfriend was 20 at the time and supported my decision. It was very difficult but I made sure it was an open adoption and I still see my birthdaughter. The best thing you can do (you are already doing) is to be there for her no matter what. You could suggest she look at some websites on open adoption and parenting options. The ultimate decision will need to be made by her and her boyfriend. Adoption is rare but can be a wonderful, rewarding option. Good luck to you and your friend, I really appreciated having friends like yourself throughout my pregnancy.
2006-09-15 21:00:39 · answer #5 · answered by melissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
#1 talk to her parents then If they truly are not ready for the challenge Adoption is a great choice.
I was adopted and I thank God every day that I was. My birth mom was in similar circumstances and my adoptive parents couldn't have children so I was the best gift anyone could have given them. I am now 37 and my birth mother and I have started to write to eachother so I truly feel for all of you involved as this will change all of your lives no matter what the choice. There are open adoptions that allow for some contact or closed where the baby goes to a family with no further contact. I will pray things go well no matter what her choice is, she is so very lucky to have you.
2006-09-15 20:52:00 · answer #6 · answered by NotSoTweetOne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend needs to accept the consequences of her irresponsible actions. Are there people who still have unprotected sex?!!! What about AIDS and STI'S?!!!
On the other hand, there is abortion. THis will take away the baby but not the memory of having killed your child. Your friend will never forget having an abortion. And yes, abortion is killing. The question is whether or not that she thinks that killing her child is for the betterment of her future.
Its unfortunate that she is 17 and pregnant, but that is her own fault. She should have the baby and give it away if she does not want it. I do not see why her beby should die to give her a better future that she messed up all on her own. And who said that abortion = better future? Your future is what you make it, and she can make it with the support of the people who love her like you. And please learn from her mistake.
2006-09-15 22:01:54 · answer #7 · answered by fareen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was 17 (well 18 when she was born)and boyfriend was 26 and we had our baby are still together with 2 more kids we have been together 12 yrs and married 6. And we are happy very happy! And he did not go to jail for sat rape! never knew anyone to go to jail when the teen was 17 younger yes 17 no.
remember adoption is also an option and some gparents adopt their grand babies and raise them as their own so they are still at least in the family. Good Luck but you NEED to tell your parents
2006-09-15 20:56:45 · answer #8 · answered by impala1972 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a difficult time, and your friends are lucky to have someone like you to offer support. The decision must be that of your best friend, of course, but if it were up to me, I would go for a termination, that the guy pays for.
Everyone learn from the experience. Sex is grown-up stuff, and a 17 and 23 year old should know better.
2006-09-15 20:41:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly Having The Age Difference Like That, Good Luck On Gettin' Them To Stay Together......I'd Say Abortion.
2006-09-15 20:35:50 · answer #10 · answered by iLL_TeK_NeekZ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋