My boyfriend and his mother eat my money up... what should I do?

Question

I know I might sound stupid. But I am a christian, and christians help people out when they need help. Because when you do that, you will in return be blessed. But now I feel like it has got out of hand with my boyfriend and his mother. They have helped me out before, but not nearly as much as I have. Everytime I turn around she needs money, and I loan her anything from $50-$300 dollars. I have even did several loans for her that she has never paid, and I am in a lot of financial situations because of her. I buy my boyfriend and his family food almost everyday. His mom lost his job, and my boyfrien is looking for a job. Recently their cars got tooken away from them, and now they are driving my car. Should I stop helping them out? If so, how can I tell them without hurting them?

Answer 1

BE SINCERE AND SIMPLY APOLOGIZE NEXT TIME YOU ARE ASKED (for cash or food)- SAYING "I AM SOO SORRY I JUST CANT. I HAVE GOT MY SELF IN A HOLE AND I AM HAVING A HARD TIME GETTING OUT OF IT".
they should know what you mean and where you are coming from.
maybe they will make an effort to help you out of your bind.
if they dont they arent your true friends at all.
and if they are good reliable people deep down inside- EVERY BODY WINS!!

Answer 2

Find where it says in the bible that you should help others until you are living in a card board box? It isn't there. Helping people is fine, but do you remember the saying that "you can give a man a fish and feed him for a day, or teach him to fish and feed him for life"? You're only giving the fish. You're not helping.

Dump him. He will either go out and get a job or leech onto someone else. I'm betting the latter.

Answer 3

STOP BEING A TWIT and tell them to get up off their butts and do something for themselves!!! They are taking advantage of you, and you are letting them. Lose the boyfriend, and you will lose the mother as well.

Forget about the money she owes you, you will probably never see that money again. He's lost his job, she doesn't have a job, they're driving your car, and you don't want to hurt their feelings?? Come on, get a backbone and stand up for yourself!! This is your stuff they're using, and I bet you don't get a car with a full tank of gas either.

Don't worry about their feelings, this is about your feelings. Tell them they have a certain amount of time to get their affairs in order, because the Bank of Sweettart05921 is closed for business.

Answer 4

You are being a door mat. of course you need to stop handing money over to them.Yoy don't owe them anymore.Just explain that from now on you have bills that you have to get caught up on and you can no longer be able to lend them any money or your car!If they are driving your car are they also covered by your car insurance and your paying that also?
"Old Chinese proverb that applies.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.Teach a man to fish and he will never go hungry"

Answer 5

if u love ur bf u will talk to him and tell him how u feel and maybe u can raise money for them amybe through a chruch function i mean there r ways u can help them without comin out ur pocket everyday

Answer 6

They are taking advantage of your good christian nature.They are bleeding you dry.Get rid of your boyfriend and find a proper christian boyfriend.You deserve to be treated with the upmost respect,they are using you.

Answer 7

Move out. Tell them you have to take care of an aunt in another state.

Answer 8

definetly stop...this sounds like it is way beyond helping out and become supporting. Once you start saying "no" its easy I promise, i had the same problem..minus the boyfriend and mom thing...

Answer 9

Start getting promisory notes and making them pay it back.

Answer 10

never let someone borrow money when they already owe you money. they are taking advantage of you. draw your boundary and know when to say NO.