How to break it to them?

Question

I'm currently in high school and I've been thinking about college. I've decided that I'm defiently not going. My mother understands and backs me up, but my father on the other hand, I don't know. My question is, what is the best way to break it to him that I don't plan on going to college? He knows I've been tested gifted, make good grades, and all, and he talks about college all the time, about scholarships, and how he would pay for it and all, even tho he's a high school drop out. Please help me decide how to tell him. I'm afraid if I did it the wrong way he would either be mad or disappointed.

I don't ever plan on going to college, I'm going to move when I get out of high school and try to get a career in music. If that falls thru, I write books, and some of them have already been send to publishers and have been accepted. I work at his motorcycle shop, I have for 10 years. I have all kinds of real life experience, and business experience. Also, I have my own money, I could get a scholarship and then pay for my own books, or he could, but I don't want to go. Also, those people who used the fast food workers as examples in their answers, that's a good comparison, except for the fact that I personally wouldn't be happy as a teacher, a doctor, a nurse, or anything to do with college.

Answer 1

Have you tried telling him what you want to do? Convince him that what you want to do in the future you don't need college. Even though he wants you to go, he may know that this is what you want and agree. He may put up a fight on the other hand. Then try your best to explain what you want to do and thats what your going to do.

Answer 2

I think that anyway he'll be disappointed and probably mad as well. But now the most important question is what are you planning to do if you are not going to college. That's what he's going to ask you right away and you should have a good answer. Also have you consider how hard it is to do great in the future without a collage education, are you sure that years in too this decision you are not going to regret it, you do know you are putting yourself in a huge disadvantage by taking this road....
Sincerely go to college, there is gotta be something that you want to do, and that you can develop a skill in college and make a career out of it.

Answer 3

just sit down with him and your mom and be open and honest. Tell him why, and then listen to what he has to say. Why don't you want to go to college? Being gifted and getting good grades is a good reason to go. Plus, in this day, a college education will get you the same amount of money a high school education got our parents' generation. You can barely live off of a high school education anymore, especially our generation when you have no experience to make up for an ed. Because of these facts, could you consider a compromise with your dad? You could try it for a semester, and if you still didn't like it, you could try to find something else you like to do.

added- trust me, I know about the barely living off of a high school education thing. The job sucks as bad as the pay. While my husband and I have been getting our education, we have worked high school level jobs, and we have a mound of debt, no savings, and an uncertainty on how to pay our bills to show for it. We are thrilled that I have now graduated and am job hunting for a job that we can actually live on.

Answer 4

Picture yourself 10 or 20 or 30 years from now.
Then go look at the people working in the fast food places, restraunts and bars. do they look happy and fulfilled? where do you think you will be? college usually only comes once in a lifetime, if you don't go now, you never will chances are very high you will wind up in a low pay low satisfaction job forever.
its the difference of about 20-150 thousand dollars a year. look in your local paper, see how much an apartment is going for in a decent neighborhood, look at the prices of houses, look at how much cars cost - call up some places to see how much they would pay you to work. you will meet a better type of guy at college too, one that is more educated and has better manners. you should go, tough out the 4 years then you are free free free - if you blow it now you will regret it the rest of your life - go talk to school counselors, talk to adults in low paying jobs - just don't be silly - if you don't want to move away, then find some college close.

Answer 5

Be honest with your dad and respectfully tell him how you feel, and ask him why this issue is so important to him. Remember there are two sides to every coin. I'm sure he just wants a better life for you than the one he has. Love sometimes causes parents to seem somewhat pushy, but we need to try to understand their reasoning as well as our own. Also, you might compromise and see how he feels if you just take a year off from education while you decide what is really best for your life because no matter what anyone thinks, it is still YOUR life.

Answer 6

College education can increase your income from High School only to well over 30%.
It's just a few more years of schooling. Being educated is something one on can take away from you. Stay in school you'll be great full later.
If your heart is truly set on not going, then be honest with your Dad, trying to hide your true reasons, may make him mad. But he should understand it's your choice to not continue your education or higher learning.

Answer 7

Yes, he will indeed be hugely angry and disappointed and not understand. Therefore, you might have to literally make secret plans to exit the area you live with a few firnmes whjo are like minded atfer everyone has gone to sleep. Have a plan with others to do things like learning housebuilding, or join the peace corps. Make fabulous use of your time and experiences. You can later write that you needed to find what your values and beliefs were outside of the family, that you live them abd you will someday return.

Answer 8

Grab a pen and paper...now find somewhere comfortable and quiet and Sit down...write down what you plan to be doing with your life 10 years from now. After you have wrote this down make a list. In this list realistically write down the things that you can do between now and then to help you achieve this goal.
When you have this figured out, go to your dad. Tell him your goal and have a conversation with him telling him that you have thought this out. You know how you plan to meet this goal and he will respect that!!

Answer 9

there is really no good way to break the news of not going to college to a parent but i think it will cushion the blow alittle if you have some kind of goals set in life you said that you were tested gifted i hope you dont just sit back and waste all that talent but there are alot of ways to become succcessful withput going to college but i think you should have some kind of career plan to make him feel alittle better

Answer 10

Why not go to college? It's an opportunity. But if you think you need a break then tell him so and make him understand that even einstein needed a good rest..good luck!!!