got married 2 months ago,known him 6, Im haveing filling hes very sneeky , I dont beleive i trust him. he opens bank accounts i dont know about puts all our lights gas cable in his name . likes me to be stuck at home when hes at work. so dont leave car . i have his daughter takeing care of her. tell me how do i find out if im wrong n what hes doing ?
2006-09-15 12:26:34 · 26 answers · asked by imthisrosetoo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like your husband is controlling and abusive. Though you only describe controlling behavior here ... opening bank accounts you don't know about (presumably in his name, only); all the utilities are in his name (so he can control keeping them on or turning them off, to keep you in line); taking the car so that you are not allowed to leave the house. If it's this bad at 2 months into the marriage I can promise you it will only get worse and worse. I'm not an advocate of divorce, but in this situation you'd be wise to keep it as an option. I worked with battered, abused (controlled) women for 11 years. And what you describe has me very concerned. Email me, if you'd like, I'd be happy to talk with you. God bless!
2006-09-15 13:39:02 · answer #1 · answered by celticwoman777 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to communicate with him and find out what's going on. Why would you marry him after only knowing him 6 months? Obviously, and not to be judgmental at all, you didn't know him well enough before you got married. I'm sorry you have to deal with all this.
I met my husband, got engaged, and got married within a 6 month period also and we've been happily married almost 6 years. All short term engagements aren't bad.
If you don't communicate, all you're able to go on is suspicions and accusations.
2006-09-15 12:31:35 · answer #2 · answered by TxCatLuvr 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk to him tell him you want more freedom you feel like you are being controlled if he still does this them maybe you should seek counseling and maybe even a divorce i do not agree with divorce but some times it is the only answer but try talking first let him know what you are thinking. 6 months is not really long enough to get to know someone next time spend more time getting to know them before you take such a big step this could mess up the rest of your life.
GOOD LUCK
2006-09-15 12:56:03 · answer #3 · answered by tim s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this but it sounds like he not only got him a new live in babysitter bu a new possession as well. I am not one to bad mouth love if that is what you feel you have. But if you see yourself doing more with your life then you need to make plans. or just be happy with the way things are in any case. good luck.
2006-09-15 12:40:42 · answer #4 · answered by LaLa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really don't know what to tell you
i don't want to come right out and tell you that you made a mistake but that's what is seems to me
i think that you should have waited a bit longer to know him better and find out things about him
but now that you've done the deed
all i can say is that he is now showing you his true colors and he's now coming into the light where his actions are concerned
in my opinion you should find out from him what he expects from you
i mean let him word it out so that your clear on what his wishes is of you
and then if you don't agree about them let him know and try to see if you both can work things out
i wish for the best for you
2006-09-15 12:54:55 · answer #5 · answered by annie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey i got married to soon too like 3 months ago and well I'm also 4months pregnant ,filing for a separation already . if there's no trust then there's nothing. and i only knew hI'm for 3 weeks . my mistake im learning from it .
2006-09-15 12:32:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but you are not mature enough to even date if you married at six months. What I mean is you need to use common sense and not emotions to make your decisions.
This is your fault as much as it is his.
I feel sorry for his daughter in all of this. Shame on both of you for messing with her life.
2006-09-15 12:42:19 · answer #7 · answered by Martin M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry your going thru this but you brought it upon yourself!! I dated my husband for 5 years before we got married!!! I have been married now for about 9 years going on 10. Same mistake my sister made just like yours!! But at least the man doesn't hide things from her!!!!!
2006-09-15 12:38:34 · answer #8 · answered by Rainbow Brite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't advise you to get a divorce. People give up on relationships too easily nowadays. Instead of talking to us here, you need to be asking him WTF's up with his behavior. Also, if he is a dirtbag, you probably already saw the signs before you married him. Communication is key. Talk to the man and let him know that you're not having it.
2006-09-15 12:32:04 · answer #9 · answered by hiclaude 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well I have to say... you should have known him a bit longer than you did before you said the vows. However, since that has been done, I have no clue unless you just talk to him about how you are feeling and what you are thinking. Biggest part of a relationship is communication. Good luck.
2006-09-15 12:29:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋