I know a guy in my acting class and me and him get along great.
He's like a really good guy to joke around with and would seem like a great guy to be friends with; however--
I have to be a different side of me in order for us to really be good friends.
I don't mind being that side of me, but it makes me do horrible improv comedy..so I actually kinda do mind.
The class is at a community college, so I'll be going a university next year (if i can afford it and am accepted..gpa is pretty low to get in so I should be ok) where there are tons of really cool people to hang out with there and I won't have to change for anyone..but since thats next summer and not now and I've been in this situation(having to change myself in order to make a possible friend) a couple of times and I haven't really met anyone in a loong while I'd actually want to get to know..should I just find a way to "change suits" until I get the university?
2006-09-15 11:29:53 · 9 answers · asked by a_aramirez 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If you have to change yourself to have him as a friend, he's not a friend. Be yourself and you will truly have friends.
Damn, that sounded too deep; I need another beer.
2006-09-15 11:34:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
People say relationships take work. And yes, they do! However, it's something that both parties need to be invested in. If you are making all the changes and sacrifices to suit him then you are his slave, not his friend. Try being yourself, and maybe he'll still accept you. If so, then he is a friend. If not - - - - -.
Don't over work the situation. It should be natural and comfortable. If you are walking on eggs then a few eggs will get broken. Clear away the things that cause problems by talking. Let him know how you feel about different things and what makes you uncomfortable.
Suppose you like shocking your lover with an electrical cord - - - should he allow you to shock him if it makes him uncomfortable? No. And neither should you have to do something you don't want to do.
Focus on your self and your needs. Study, graduate, make a better person of yourself. If he likes what he sees then he will still, and always, be your friend.
Best wishes, from a true friend.
2006-09-15 11:43:52 · answer #2 · answered by tercir2006 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should most definitely NOT pretend you are someone else to make new friends. Not only is it incredibly difficult, you will never feel comfortable with the relationship because it will have been based on a lie. Just be yourself and work on becoming the best you you can be. I have found that the more you are comfortable in your own skin and have a strong sense of self, the more people tend to gravitate towards you. People can sense insincerity and by putting on an act, you may be pushing away the very people you hope to befriend. Good luck with University!
2006-09-15 11:40:51 · answer #3 · answered by MCB 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why are you trying so hard to impress this guy? You're leaving next year. So, if you don't want to be someone else then don't be someone else. It's pretty simple. If he doesn't like you for it you won't have to see him ever again....When you go to the university next year anyway. Good luck.
2006-09-15 11:38:53 · answer #4 · answered by Dean-o 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nah, you should be yourself! He's not worth the effort if he doesn't like you, for you. C'mon its college, there are thousands of people to make friends with, don't limit yourself.
2006-09-15 11:39:48 · answer #5 · answered by Smitty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not worth having a friend, if you can't be yourself. That's kinda the whole beauty of it. They like you for you.
2006-09-15 11:38:41 · answer #6 · answered by Nicole H 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your to confusing for me hon! I think if you like him then you shouldn't have to change and you should just stay with your studying. Good Question. God Bless you!
2006-09-15 15:11:06 · answer #7 · answered by SecretUser 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you know the answer
Have fun
2006-09-15 12:16:42 · answer #8 · answered by K.O. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be urself.
2006-09-15 11:37:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋