How is it possible for couples to "stop" loving each other?

Question

I just don't understand this. I mean, could you ever "fall out of love" with your mother or you child?

I think people who say this never loved the person in the first place.

Answer 1

I don't think it's that we stop loving each other, it's just that we stop being 'in' love with each other. I mean I've been with my husband for 6 years and in the early years of our marriage he cheated on me, and lied about it. And then continued on after being caught, I thought that I could get past it because I love this man, and regardless of the fact that he cheated and lied, we can get past this, right? Wrong! This was about 3 years ago and I've honestly tried to get over it, but all the lies and betrayal that I went through with him, I'm slowly coming to the realization, that maybe I'm no longer in love with him. Have you ever heard that song by Tina Turner, "What's Love Got To Do With It," I finally understand what it means. I don't think it's possible for a couple to stop loving each other, after all the hell my husband put me through, I still love him, and I always will. The bigger, more important issue is am I still in love with him. There is a difference between the two, and the sooner you figure it out, the better off you'll be.

Answer 2

i don't think couples actually stop loving each other i mean if they were really in love in the first place, i think some couples who say that they don't love the other one just do it because they either don't want to or do not know how to explain why they want a divorce/break up whatever , if you say that it's like a means to a end ,like there is no -way i want you back or we are never getting back together. it tends to crush the other person's hope for any type of reconciliation, at least in my particular case i told my recent ex-husband i didn't love him anymore i did and i still do and i always will ,plus we have son together , so it's just one of those things , however i so not want him back period ,we had fun , and of course lots of hard times together , now we are both in really good relationships and i would never change the fact we met and were together so long , i learned alot of things , and we are still friends so it all works out in the end.

Answer 3

Honestly, I think the problem arises mainly when 1) someone is too quick to declare "love" in response to the other party in order to avoid hurting their feelings or some other ridiculous response or 2) when one person does not understand what love is and thinks the passing of those lovely initial hormonal surges means the end of love. I have been in your shoes, you can't know what they are or was thinking or feeling, or the motives for there actions. It hurts now, but you can find true love someday, probably when you're not looking. So be strong, & good luck.

Answer 4

I don't necessarily think you "stop" loving someone. I just think people grow apart. People change. Not all couples change in the same direction. Not only that, but sometimes when we fall in love with someone they are not always the person we thought they were.

Answer 5

People change and love does fade.. *sigh*. That being said, mother and child have a bond that unfortunately "partners" don't. And depending on expectations age all these are factors on staying together

Answer 6

very good question. many factors can make a couple fall out of love. from outside family members, gossip, different interests, different up-bringing, etc. in my case, my wife & i are 2 totally different people altogether. we were different when we got together, but now it worse as ever. in my experience, ive found when 2 people who come together (from completely different backgrounds) usually will clash on many issues. from raising kids, house-hold duties, financial decisions, etc. then again, i know of couples who are way different & make a great team. i think when the common ground you both shared at one point is gone, then everything starts drifting away. my wife & i are used to shop together, workout together, take kids to park, go 2 sporting events, go 2 eachother's family gatherings, etc. but since my wife got in an accident at work, her family now always wanting to borrow our car, drug use, not agreeing with other immediate families lifestyles, etc. were just not same couple anymore. couples that ive seen with common ground, whether it be similar interests, family values, goals, etc can go a long way since they compliment eachother as a team. member there is no "I" in team....its all about "we." as in kids, husband/wife, household priorities, etc.

Answer 7

You are right you can't fall in love with someone and then fall out of it.If it's that easy you where never in love.

Answer 8

Anything that you can fall into, you can fall out of. It's just a fact of life. Nothing, and I mean nothing, lasts forever.

Answer 9

People change. Sometimes you like the changes. Sometimes you don't. Sometimes they weren't who they pretended to be when you first met them.

Sometimes you're mistaking passion/lust for love. Love can be incredibly boring...and some people don't get that.

Answer 10

I think people who ask questions like this have not loved long enough.