My father convenced me to leave my kids in Iowa and move to Arkansas. He left his kids behind in his second marriage. They have nothing to do with him at all. He has been married to my mother under nazi rule for 26 years unable to sneeze without permission, my older brother has been married twice and had three kids, one living with him as he still lives with my dad under his rule. My dad said in time I will forget the pain of loosing my kids, and I will be much happier without them. He said I should be with him the original family. That I will have less stress and less worries than if I were still living in Iowa near my kids and under my ex-wifes rule. Is he right? or is he Satan in disguise?
2006-09-15 10:44:47 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
his advise is horrible, so if you do the opposite of what he does you'll be OK. most important, if you do what your heart tells you, you'll probably make the right decision. Don't abandon your kids ever, they're the biggest treasure, be a man and the role model your father never was, your actions are going to be the best example for them, you set the standard. Sorry but the truth is your dad wants to validate his actions by having you guys repeat his history. you just need to brake the circle he started and prove him wrong. Do the right thing, you don't need his advice. If you thought he was right then you wouldn't even ask, you know the right thing to do. Thank God you're not like him.
2006-09-15 11:32:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one can make the decision for you, as you have to decide what is in your heart. But we can give you some of our opioions. I for one would not leave my present family behind, no matter what, what your dad did was wrong as well. Unless you and your wife just can not get along, but if you have a great marriage whey destory it at. What if you move in your dads house adn figure out that is not what you want in life now, is your wife goign to take you back . I dont think so. How are you goign to tell your children about the life you chose over them. I know exactly how them kids are going to feel, because my real dad ( who is deceased now) but he chose, his new wife after my om and him were married for 5 years, him and his new wife had 3 kids together , i never seen or met my dad. The last time i seen him and i vaguely remember it i was 5, I just remeber waking up and he was leaving thats all i remember. Just think of the kids if anything. And if you were to leave, and yor wife remarries and that person treats them kids just like his own how are you going feel about it?
That is all i am going to say. I wish you the best of luck in whatever you chose, just remeber you have to live the life you chose some things cant be changed after it happens.
2006-09-15 10:53:31 · answer #2 · answered by tammy3873 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Satan in disguise, no one who truly loved you would ask you to make just a mistake. Your kids should be your number one priory, go back to them before it's too late. The stress of dealing with your ex, is better than living without your children. Your dad sounds like a devil, leave go back to your kids, don't punish them for your and your ex's mistakes and don't let your dad fool you into believing you can forget your kids, you will just regret it later in life, don't make the mistake. GO TO YOUR KIDS NOW!!!!!!!!
2006-09-15 10:53:35 · answer #3 · answered by ME 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do YOU want? This isn't his life, its your life, and you should be making your own decisions. Why should you get over the pain in time, when you can continue to be a part of their life if thats what you want. It sounds like you are still under his thumb, do you like living under Nazi rule? You created your own family, even if the marriage didn't work out, your children are still your children, don't abandon them, they will always wonder what they did to make you mad at them.
2006-09-15 10:52:46 · answer #4 · answered by smartypants909 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You dad has major issues and he doesn't have your best interests at heart. You are a father - which means you need to be there for your kids, whether you are with your wife or not. You aren't living under your ex-wife's rule if you aren't married to her and living with her. Your kids do deserve their dad and they need their dad - don't do something selfish like leave them just so you can live with your dad and be oblivious to everything.
2006-09-15 10:47:49 · answer #5 · answered by Rawrrrr 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It looks like your Dad still wants to control your life.
I am a father who has a son, that lives about 1500 miles away. Try stretching your heart that distance...It would hurt.... That it's exactly how it feels when your children are far from you.
You are your own individual. You know what is best for you, and your children. You KNOW the answer to your question.
2006-09-15 10:52:08 · answer #6 · answered by lucero63e10 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No oh my god are you stupid, why in the hell did u have kids if you want to just dump them for no f ucking reason, you are old enough to make ur decisions, if you choose to go with your dad you would regret it for the rest of your life, and if i was your child i would hate you for the rest of my life and even if i was the only person that could save ur life i would let you die, since you never cared much about me, and payback is a bi tch
2006-09-15 10:56:36 · answer #7 · answered by lilykiss8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Satan in disguise
2006-09-15 10:47:31 · answer #8 · answered by Brezzy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry you listened to him a mothers love and loss is nowhere near as a mans.he did the wrong thing and you will resent him for it and be mad at yourself for doing this.your
children should come first before anything.
2006-09-15 11:15:55 · answer #9 · answered by nanny2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you even consider leaving your kids? They didn't chose to be born.Yes,he is the devil in disguise
2006-09-15 11:20:51 · answer #10 · answered by missmadhatter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋