you? would it be that bad to go and satisfy the needs she's not meeting and still be with her?
4yrs. and a kid I stay true but my eyes are wandering more and more each day
2006-09-15 09:13:25 · 16 answers · asked by D 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If sex is so sooo.. try some new tricks. Get a book on the Kama sutra
2006-09-15 09:15:51 · answer #1 · answered by Serious Mandy 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, dude, the first part of your question is understandable. Its tough when you really love and care about someone and the sex isn't great.
But thinking of going outside of your marriage is a bit low, as you are finding from your other answerers. I would suggest going to a therapist. Not long term therapy, but decide to go to like three sessions. Talking about sex is VERY threatening, so having a third party there will help the conversation. If you tell your wife basically, "I love you, I don't want to stray, but I'm losing interest in you sexually," she might just transform into an ideal stripper/sex vixen right before your eyes.
Be careful though, sometimes a woman's sexuality is MUCH stronger than a guys, you might be starting something where, in a year or two, YOU are the little prude holding things back.
Good luck.
.
2006-09-15 09:25:02 · answer #2 · answered by robabard 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No ,i would not get married because sex it's a big part of a relationship and if you not satisfied you gone end up doing exactly what you thinking of doing cheating,people that really love each other don't cheat,you staying true now as you say but i long can you resist the temptation.if you really love her you should let her know about the way you feel ,even teach or show her or you would like to be it to be.I'm sure she'll probably do it and maybe satisfied you .you'll only know if you truthful about the way you feel because if you love that woman she deserved to know the true about her relationship,and the rest is up to you
2006-09-15 09:26:39 · answer #3 · answered by jolie minouche 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk with her, tell her that you'd like to try new things. Kama Sutra, marriage counseling, toys, lingerie, new places.....She should be more than willing to try to make you happy... Just don't be an as$ about it. And maybe you should go get a load off, try to settle down your urges, and start thinking with the right brain a little. You have been with her for 4 years and have a kid together? You should have stept up and married her a long time ago. You've just been leading her on and taking advantage of her. I think you're a little immature. Sex and family shouldn't be taken lightly. It's not right of you to sleep with her and not commit. And it's not right of you to be looking at other women like that! Sex is a two-way street. If you're not that into it, then it's not going to inspire her to be into it either. Show her how to gets her groove on!!! Take her and make sweet love to her the way you want to, appreciate her..... get your mind right and it will be better. Ask her what she likes, what you can do to make things better for her; to where she would enjoy herself more and feel free to let loose her inhibitions. Tell her that you feel like she's not enjoying herself as much, and ask her what you can do to help her to let go more, and be a little wild!!!
2006-09-15 09:19:27 · answer #4 · answered by verony 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love shouldn't be denied. I have been with my wife 19 years. I still remember the marriage test we had to take at Normandale Lutheran Church in Edina, MN. The Pastor said we matched up great except for one little detail. Yeah you guessed, I wanted to rock frequently and my wife to be was good with an every now and then kinda thing.
He expressed concern that this might be an issue. Similar to the kind raised in your question. And yeah at times it is a major league frustration for us both, but we love each dearly and have learned to make time for it and to never let that physical intimacy just dry up and blow away. Because if it does, well then we might as well just be good friends. Right??
And dude, find ways to help your wife ignite that fire. If you care about her, you'll find the ways and who knows you might find a Jenna Jameson side to your wife you never knew existed. Go forth and discover!!
2006-09-15 09:19:42 · answer #5 · answered by KERMIT M 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you love her, there are ways to spice up your sex life. It's not hard and it doesn't even have to include movies or sex toys. Go to a book store or even on-line for some ideas. Or be creative in your mind. Love is more than just sex anyways. She should also be your best friend, like my husband is mine. Good luck and try it.
2006-09-15 09:38:54 · answer #6 · answered by MiMi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tough question, but as important as sex is, there is more to marriage than just sex, even then some days sex will be good some just ok, just try to make the best of every occassion, try talking and find out how you both feel about it, but if sex is the most important for you, then forget it, you´ll be frustrated by the end of the first night.
2006-09-15 09:22:19 · answer #7 · answered by Juan V 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Then obviously you don't love her enough. Maybe you're focusing too much on the sex having to get better. Mediocre is better than none, considering you don't die if you don't get sex = It shouldn't be as important as people make it.
2006-09-15 09:49:57 · answer #8 · answered by Magnuna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you turned into a stereotypical male who equates love with sex?
IF it is love so true then you will be committed enough to rekindle the flames. Remember, it takes two and one of them is YOU!
2006-09-15 10:07:34 · answer #9 · answered by anieska 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your unsure then don't do it. Can you live with mediocre sex life? I don't think so if your a male. Is that all you base your relationships on? If so your so closed minded.
2006-09-15 09:16:37 · answer #10 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋