She's been talking behind my back and my other friends backs and I'm sick of it. Please help.
2006-09-15 06:55:59 · 40 answers · asked by Rosebud 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I've been caught doing this myself. I usually don't feel very good either doing it or after I've done it. The disrespect that I feel for myself afterwards makes it harder to do the right thing and apologize and swear off of it.
So it becomes like a binge cycle, I talk more s h * t about people for a little while until I re-convince myself that I'm actually a nice guy, and then I stop.
So your friend probably isn't feeling too good about herself right now. The best way to stop it from happening is NOT to retaliate, but play a little psych game. Build her up. If she's been running you down to others, go back to those others and have a conversation that's very sensitive and loving about your friend. and conclude with some of the reasons you love and respect her.
2 things will happen-
The people you talk to will think what a beautiful friend you are to have, and what a wicked bi**h she is for saying something bad about you. The next time she tries it, they'll jump down her throat.
It'll get back to her the wonderful things you're saying about her and she'll feel so guilty about what she's done that her self-esteem will hit super-critical low. She'll have to talk to you about whatever it was that was bothering her.
No matter how you slice it, you come out a winner.
I've actually done this, with GLORIOUS results!
2006-09-15 07:05:21 · answer #1 · answered by Jerry 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is your friend, then tell her how you fell! She might have stuff going on that you don't know about. Ask her if everything is o.k. because you've noticed she's not acting like she used to. Tell her gently that you've found out she was gossiping about you and you'd like to know why she would do that. If she's not your friend and not worth the effort, then take the high road, be the better person and just ignore her. If someone else brings something to you then you can set them straight. Good luck!
2006-09-15 07:01:33 · answer #2 · answered by ore2nc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do for yourself is to put this behind you. You are right, if your friend is talking about you behind your back, that is rude & disrespectful. It also puts into doubt if this person is a friend to you at all.
So what can you do? Find a new friend that you can trust.
2006-09-15 06:59:54 · answer #3 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally for me, once you start ignoring her and when you see her just act like you don't know her and soon she will realize that the reason why you act like that towards her is because she knows that you know that she did something really wrong behind your back...she'll hopefully apologize to you about what she did....fighting over it is not going to solve anything but start a war between the two of you...so why don't you be the woman in this situation and just ignore her.
2006-09-15 06:58:00 · answer #4 · answered by lilsweetone619 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not be her friend anyone. It is so bad when people keep stabbing each other back and forth. Someone will get really hurt. Talk to her and tell her this is it, if you do not smarten up we will no longer be friends. If she was a good friend, she would never of done this anyways.
2006-09-15 06:57:42 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's simple...Stop being her friend. That's all you have to do. Ignore her...when she asks why, say you don't want to hang out with someone who constantly talks about other people including yourself, behind their backs and then walk away or hang up or whatever...
2006-09-15 06:58:18 · answer #6 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's not a friend at all.You need to confront her in front of all your real friends and let them and her know about herself.Tell her to stop being so back stabbing and if she was real then she shouldn't have anything to say behind your back that she can't say to your face.
2006-09-15 06:57:56 · answer #7 · answered by DiamondXxx 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Friends aren't rude to each other. Just stop talking to her. Or better yet, tell her that you no longer want to be friends with her and stop talking to her altogether. There are plenty other people to make friends with. Good luck!
2006-09-15 06:58:51 · answer #8 · answered by movie_crit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well u can ask her whats her problem? or u can be the bigger person and ignore her and when she needs something she will come back to you and ask why havent you been talking to her. let her talk behind your back, inless you hear it come from her mouth then believe it forsure. but if you goin by he say she say **** dont always believe that cuz alot of people will hate. just remember what goes around comes around. dont waist your time or breath, she will come to you.
2006-09-15 07:00:40 · answer #9 · answered by LiL MaMa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
gurl you should do what all people do confront her and say i heard that you have been talling behind my back. This is what my friend did to her friend and i think that you should do something to make her stop if something goes wrong like she want to fight you tell an adult which includes your mom and tell her what is happening.
2006-09-15 06:59:41 · answer #10 · answered by shylilgurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋