i just started a new job, and all my coworkers are males in their 50s and 60s and i am a young 20 somthing year old grad student...is that a bad sign or not? do u think they like me?
just ask me a lot of personal questions and than make jokes about me, or sometimes they just yell out my name in the office for no reason
2006-09-15 06:53:54 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
that sounds harmless enough, if they're not directly insulting you, then its probably their way of breaking in the new young guy. dont be afraid to stand your ground if something is really bugging you, but otherwise, i wouldnt worry about it. and, once you're pretty comfortable with these guys, dont be afraid to give them a little back too. that way they know that you're comfortable with it all.
and, if you're a girl, as long as its nothing sexual, i wouldnt worry about it. if they're teasing you in a harmless way, they probably just want to make you laugh a little.
2006-09-15 06:57:13 · answer #1 · answered by hellion210 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They are not teasing you - they are seeing where you fit in, and if you continue as you have been doing you will be bottom of the pecking order the whole time. Blokes don't do 'personal' so tell them to mind their own business or just don't answer, or smile enigmatically (or coldly, if you can manage that) It takes some practice.
What you are describing as 'teasing' is far more probably a veiled insult. Look at the kind of thing they are saying and reply IN KIND. So if they comment on your clothes, mention they are wearing a really dodgy tie today, or did someone else pick out that shirt? Never accept their comment, they are trying to trip you up. Practice with the day's comments when you get home and you'll soon get the idea. If you get stuck, give us some examples and I'll try some suggestions for you.
Older men (they can't possibly be older than 55) are extremely sensitive about their hair, so if you get really stuck peer at their hairline and say 'Gosh do all guys your age go thin on top?'. Again, practice and find some phrases that sound like you.
2006-09-15 14:16:56 · answer #2 · answered by Tertia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's just plain old good fun but I gather that it is hurting you. I don't think that they are intentionally hurting you however you do need to talk to them about it. Don't let it get out of hand because sometimes that does tend to happen. Just tell them how you feel and if they keep it up then you may have to go to the boss after all they are supposed to be the adults setting an example for the younger generation. I am in my early 40"s and I would not be teasing a 20 year old. I would be showing them the ropes if anything. Good luck.
2006-09-15 13:59:54 · answer #3 · answered by Medical and Business Information 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am nearing 50, and come from a clan of folks that are oft described as having "a dry sense of humor" OR " a bunch os smart A____es," depending on your point of view. We tease and get teased near incessantly. For us it is not mean spirited, but sometimes WE understand the joke and others don't. I can still stir up a dandy dirty look from my wife when I meant nothing at all mean with what and how I said it- was "just teasing." Maybe you should be on your guard to be safe, but listen to the teasing and see if that is not ultimately all they are doing. Of course, speaking not as a teaser myself, but rather a DAD, there are boundaries to teasing. Let no one cross them without a "I do not appreciate comments like that" if they come.
2006-09-15 14:08:58 · answer #4 · answered by Mike R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like they enjoy your company and are happy to have some new blood in the office. Especially of the female persuation.
If you find yourself in a group that likes to rib each other (as well as you), then join in...easy at first until you understand the general guidelines they have about what you can joke about.
As long as it is nothing sexist, sounds like you are in a fun place to work.
2006-09-15 13:58:39 · answer #5 · answered by ADF 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are flirting with you in their old-fart way. They think it's cute and would love it if you gave it right back to them. As long as the banter isn't cruel or intentionally hurtful just have fun with it. If someone does hurt your feelings, or hits a topic that is just way too personal, square your shoulders, look 'em in the eye and tell them the topic is off limits. Be articulate, calm and avoid insulting them back. Do it with as little emotion as possible and you will throw them for a loop, and you'll gain respect fast.
2006-09-15 14:07:11 · answer #6 · answered by smecky809042003 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as many have already pointed out regarding harassment. In any job that you have had in the past did you give the new person a hard time? I remember being sent in to the walk in freezer to get a box of pork chops at restaurant that did not sell pork chops
2006-09-15 14:07:42 · answer #7 · answered by stickman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you take it as a positive sign of acceptance by the group, it will serve you well.
If you take it as a negative, it will lead to concentration problems and poor performance and unhappiness.
Take it as a positive sign. How they mean it is not nearly as important as how you respond to it, and most of them are just following someone else's lead.
2006-09-15 13:57:29 · answer #8 · answered by Automation Wizard 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you male or female? This could be a case of sexual harrassment. If you are made to feel uncomfortable, you should talk to HR or your direct supervisor.
Additionally, they do not have the right to expect answers to personal questions.
2006-09-15 13:56:25 · answer #9 · answered by WendyD1999 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start worrying when they stop teasing you Its when they're nice to you that the axe is coming.
You're gonna get the business as a newbie in any situation, no matter what. It's how you deal with it.
2006-09-15 13:56:50 · answer #10 · answered by John K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋