I was friends with a guy for a little over a month , we had sex back in august and now i found out i'm pregnant.. For starters we are just friends ( stuff happened) and decided just to stay friends but when i told him i was pregnant he wrote back to me and said he NEVER wanted kids , he is 12 years older then me and has a life that is stable . WHAT DO I DO ? I already have 2 children that i'm raising alone ( father is involved) but i'm scared to raise a child who will possibly never know his/her father. HELP !!!
2006-09-15
05:44:02
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19 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Pregnancy & Parenting
➔ Pregnancy
I am keeping this baby , i just want to know if this has happened to anyone else !!!
2006-09-16
02:25:37 ·
update #1
I am keeping this baby , i just want to know if this has happened to anyone else !!!
2006-09-16
02:27:45 ·
update #2
Well I am a single mother of 2 children. Ages are soon to be 5 and one just turned 1. There father is not involved wtih them in any way and I do pretty good. There is nothing you can do to change his mind if he doesn't want to be a father. The only thing I can suggest for you to do is file for child support when your child is born. That is the least he can do. Good luck and congrats on your new baby.
2006-09-15 05:51:24
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answer #1
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answered by BabyGirl 3
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My son is 6! and has never met his father! It is nice! I make all the decisions and have no one else shaping my child behavior. Sometimes I get tired of doing everything myself but in the long run it is worth it. So far, there hasn't been any issues with my son. I made sure that he has positive role models in his life. He is very happy and well behaved individual. To be honest, his father not being around is probably the best thing for him.
Make sure the biological father pays support! Just because he doesn't want to be involved doesn't mean he doesn't have to pay! It is the child's legal right to have child support. It took me several years to go after my son's biological father! And he will have a better future because of it!
2006-09-15 13:03:14
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answer #2
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answered by crandle55 2
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Well he shouldn't have had sex then if he wasnt wanting kids. Because and we all know this...sex can cause pregnancy! Whether you protect against it or not.
I'm sorry to hear that he is being this way. I would just keep trying and keep him informed about the baby. Sometimes people change their minds about things. Not to give you false hope or anything because he doesn't sound like a great friend anyway!
2006-09-15 13:37:12
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answer #3
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answered by Lisa 4
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I am an adult that was born without a father. My mom raised 4 of us on her own, and all of us grew up for the better. If this man chooses not to be responsible, it's his own stupidity, but please don't allow a child the knowledge that their own father doesn't want them. Don't make the dad be a part of the child's life, because that will not only hurt you, but that'll also hurt your child. Good Luck, and hope everything turns out for you!
2006-09-15 13:14:13
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answer #4
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answered by jenniklog 2
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Don't panic <-- is not easy but possible. DON'T PUT HIS LAST NAME ON TH BABY. DON'T FILE CHILD SUPPORT. I DID and now I find a good man(a great man) he want to adopt my child and because I put his fathers last name. I have to go to Court and is a pain in the a....kick that "friend" out of your life. And keep going alone one more one less is not a problem. I have the same situation and I find a great man who my child call Daddy......so search some one better next time. there's thousand out there.
2006-09-15 12:55:41
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answer #5
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answered by j 3
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Try pointing out to him that people who 'never want kids' should have unprotected sex with 'friends' in the back of cars.
What's done is done. Firstly you need to decide what you want to do about the pregnancy. This is your decision and yours alone. If you decide to go ahead with the pregnancy, let him know. Don't allow him to change your mind. Secondly, he needs to accept the fact that his 'stable life' is going to change slightly. At the very least you are entitled to financial support.
I hope everything works out well for you.
2006-09-15 12:55:43
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answer #6
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answered by Gail H 4
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It is very simple....you tell him, both of you did this not just you, he may not want kids, but now he has one he need's to step up and be a father, he doesn't have to be with you because of it, but he does need to be there for the baby on the way. Good luck with all of this :)
2006-09-15 13:02:53
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answer #7
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answered by Just me 1
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You need to tell him the truth. You will never know. You might be the one to change his mind about having a child. Plus you wil need all the help you can. Oh yeah, and if the both of you are friends he will be there for you.
2006-09-15 13:22:55
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answer #8
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answered by Firstlady aka Bosslady 1
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I like it that way! My son is one and still hasnt met his father. In the long run it is wonderful cause my son will never know the asshole who denied hima family and i can always find another man to play the daddy role for my son. I wouldnt change it for the world. And think you wouldnt have all the arguing about who gets the baby this day or that day and the baby wont have a split family this way. I again love that my babies daddy is history. Funny thing is he pays child support and still wants nothing to do with him. Good Luck
2006-09-15 12:48:18
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answer #9
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answered by baby_gurl_3778 2
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If the baby's his, he helped put it there and should share the responsibility. He and you should have used a precaution. But, it's too late for that now. Tell him to step up and be a man.
2006-09-15 12:50:08
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answer #10
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answered by Cal 5
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