Choice # 1-- Let 2 people move into your home that will cause major stress for everyone already living there, With no move out date insight...
Choice # 2-- Co-sign for the 2 people so they can get an apartment, knowing they have skipped out on 3 other places owing money.( skipping out in the middle of the night kind of thing.)Leaving damage at one place.
The option of doing neither is not available to you for reasons that would take to long to explain. Your budget does not allow for to many changes.. What do you do???
2006-09-15 05:02:10 · 20 answers · asked by Kismitt 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I can't really answer this question without all the details. Who are these people that you have no other options? Are they family? Friends? Family I could see having only two choices, but friends.....I don't know. Remember that you are in charge of your own life and doing something that makes you uncomfortable in any situation is not right! If you have time, could you post more detail or e-mail me? Thanks and good luck!
2006-09-15 05:09:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont see why you dont have a choice. The only choice you have for yourself and your family is to do what is IN THE BEST INTEREST for you and your family.
If having people move into your home would cause undue stress to you and your family, then dont let them move in.
IF you know, that that these people dont take responsibility for themselves and leave other people to clean up after them, then you dont want to co-sign, cause when they dont pay, your left with the responsibility of whatever you co-signed for, in addition to all of your own family obligations.
It may be considered rude, but sometimes you have to be. You have to think of you and your own family first, they are your top, first and foremost priority.
If you budget doesnt allow for too many changes, take care of your family first and explain to those who are wanting your help, how much you are able to help them and why.
They may not like it that you wont let them move in, and they wont like it because you wont co-sign, but you have responsibilities of your own, and you dont have to take on to full grown adults.
They are never going to learn to do for themselves if theres always someone there to clean up after them. It sounds harsh I know, but sometimes you have to have tough love for those that you love.
Help them find an apt that is below their living standard (obviously they have been trying to live better than what they can afford, and dont appreciate the better apts they have had since there has been damage left at previous homes they have rented or leased) somewhere that DOES NOT REQUIRE A CO-SIGNER.
If paying by the month is too hard for them, help them find a place that rents by the week, the rent is often higher, but if you dont pay each week, you dont get to live there either. Some places that rent by the week often pay all the utilities except for a phone, cable and internet, those things are considered extra and you pay for them on your own.
Help them out but dont put yourself out in the cold to do so.
2006-09-15 12:16:58 · answer #2 · answered by Shalamar Rue 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Certainly not co-sign, I know of someone who has lost everything because she did this...
Allow them to move in, but set up a stipulation that they must move into their own place by a certain date and they must contribute to the housing cost with you...food, portion of hydro etc. Letting them off with no cost is not beneficial to anyone. Letting them stay for an indefinite period is going to further cause problems for all in the home.
A short duration stay with responsibilities until they can locate a place is probably the best alternative to all scenarios.
If none of the above suits...they can go live in a shelter...you can only bend backwards so far before you damage things for you.
Good luck
2006-09-15 12:09:01 · answer #3 · answered by dustiiart 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Choice number 2
2006-09-15 12:14:37 · answer #4 · answered by Rinnie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do choice #2 and make them sign a contract that you have a lawyer make. Make it so that if they sip out on the rent or damage the property in anyway they will have to check themselfs into rehab. If they do not they can be put in jail for failure to pay. You will have to be strong and do what you say you are going to do. Even if they are family. The pattern that you were are talking about is usually found in people who are addicted to drugs. There is no respect for themself. If they don't respect themselfs then how do you exspect them to respect someone else. I would not put them in the house knowing this. Be very careful not to let children be around them!!
2006-09-15 12:14:10 · answer #5 · answered by womanofthefire80 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both choices are really bad, but with the only two choices left the option one might give you some kind of control.
Prepare an written agreement about use of the space, cleaning and other duties and behavior. and have it sign and notarized, Put some penalty clauses for misbehavior whether you will enforced them later it will be up to you but it will give you some edge. Good luck.
2006-09-15 12:14:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Choice #3 - sort of like choice #1 but with rent due and move out date specified (say 4 - 6 months). If the rent is paid to you, then co-sign the lease. If not, bye, bye to them, they are on their own.
2006-09-15 12:05:55 · answer #7 · answered by DanE 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Choice # 1, but tell people moving in they have a time frame on how long they can stay there and they will have to help out on the bills.
2006-09-15 12:05:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
DO NOT COSIGN! Given their history you will probably end up with their apartment payments. Let them move in and take on the stress that will cause. Once they finally leave I am sure you will be much happier not having to pay for their apartment.
2006-09-15 12:07:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is ALWAYS other options. For whatever reason, these are the two YOU chose. Neither work for me. I would never cosign for someone who was irresponsible, and I wouldn't disrupt my home for people who I would assume are selfish and immature. I'm willing to bet this is family your describing and feel obligated to help. Well, maybe if people stopped bailing them out, they might actually grow up and take care of themselves. Personally....I'd give them the local welfare phone # and drive them there for their to apply. You have to responsible for your own choices.....welcome to life!
2006-09-15 12:12:16 · answer #10 · answered by wendy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋