when you had your 2nd baby by the time your first born is 14 month old? I just don't want my first baby to be jealous when her little sister comes. Any tips? I am a stay at home mom. All of my relatives are in the other country,so basically it's just me and my husband here in our place. I want to be the best mom that I can be..We really wanted to have 2 babies close in age so that they could keep each other's company and be bestfriends, playmates,everything..thank you..
2006-09-14 17:52:14 · 14 answers · asked by momof3 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
my first born as of now she's one year old,can't walk yet..she don't have balance yet..hopefully she's walking already by the time the 2nd one arrives..
2006-09-14 17:59:31 · update #1
my nieces are 11 months apart. they are so close to each other, they are like twins. their younger siblings are 15 months apart and while they are still pretty young, they are very close and really enjoy each others company. just try to keep your eldest involved as much as possible, even if it's a simple request like handing mommy a blanket or something, then reward the "big helper" with lots of praise. good luck!
2006-09-14 17:55:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to involve big sister in everything that you can. That's about the best I can say. My daughter is 10 yrs. older than her little brother, so she was old enough to understand that a little baby takes so much time and care. I don't think she was jealous at least that I could tell. She's just crazy over her little brother. And my step-sons said they weren't jealous, although I think my oldest step-son really is. We try to give all the same attention as the youngest, but it is hard with them being older, cause they always want to be in their rooms or outside doing their own things. I wish I could have had my two closer, but the right man didn't come along until later in my life. Sorry I can't help out any more. Oh yeah, I also try to take my daughter out to do something just me and her. I don't get a chance as often as I'd like, but it really helps just to let her know that I don't love her any less.
2006-09-15 00:59:32 · answer #2 · answered by sweet.pjs1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have 3 children, and never had any problems. My first is now 14, second is 12 and third is 9. I always included my first in everything. From feeling the baby kicking to diaper changing and feeding. Explain how important it is to be a Big Brother or Sister. Make him/her feel special about this. And reward that child for doing a great job being a good helper... Best Wishes....
2006-09-15 01:00:20 · answer #3 · answered by tinytinker79 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boys are 19 mths apart and there wasnt any jealousy just curiosity when the 2nd was born. Make sure when your child visits you in the hospital to NOT be holding the new baby. Make it all about him give him a big kiss and cuddle before introducing the new baby. Let him have some supervised contact with the new bub and in no time they will grow up to be best buddies.
2006-09-15 07:17:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your first child is bound to be a little jealous after all she has had your undivided attention for the past 14 months. Keep talking to her about the new baby coming.Once the baby is born try to let her help out with the new baby. And most importantly, try to spend some time with just you and her .
2006-09-15 01:07:37 · answer #5 · answered by Miss Kimmie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk up about the new baby coming and include your first child in helping fix the crib and all. Give her a roll in it too and she will be looking forward to the baby too. When the baby arrives, try to hold the baby and read her a story at the same time. The main thing is Mommy and Daddy should work together to give the firstborn a little "personal" attention and she will not feel left out.
2006-09-15 00:56:35 · answer #6 · answered by nobluffzone 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you want to be the best mom....wait to have the second!
If you havent gotten to the point where your first one can keep themselves busy then you'll be one exhausted mother not looking forward to the next exhausting day.
How can you hold a baby who possibly could be clingy or colic filled and be smiling and reading or playing with a toddler who is just as busy as ever and getting busier? The toddler will want all your time.
I would suggest buying a baby doll and doing a mock run with the baby if you are already expecting.
2006-09-15 00:57:29 · answer #7 · answered by tryinthis2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was the first born, maybe if my parents sat down and prepared me a bit better for this person that was going to turn my little world upside down, i wouldn't have been so jealous. when my sister arrived, they tired to pay my a lot of attention so that i didn't feel left out. my mom even let help her with little things when she would look after my sister so i felt included. it worked. i got over the initial jealousy. that years ago! from the sounds of it, you and your husband seem to be great parents and will do just fine in making both children feel special and loved.
2006-09-15 01:06:23 · answer #8 · answered by luvmuzik 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What goes on in the mind of a child? thinking of this may be your best answer to allow the older child to cooperate perfectly.
for a short time "just pretend" that what ever you have to do to the youngest.. you have to do to the oldest one too!
maybe allow the older child to think "hey ..this is not too much fun i do not want mommie fussing with me like this.. i wish she would just do it to the baby so i could get back to drinking my bottle.. or playing with that toy she just took me away from..
so a little extra play acting in this way... and not requiring too many times.. might set up things right way so the older child is perfectly happy you are not pestering him.. he will be glad instead that you are pestering the little baby.
it might only take 10 or 15 times (taking him away from the bottle he is enjoying.. or taking him away from a toy he is playing with. something a mother would never think to do because she would like him to drink his bottle or happily play. then you may never need do it again!
he will always be happy you don't have to do those inconvenient things to him any more! he will be happy the little baby is getting the attention instead leaving him the chance to do what ever he wants!!
so it is a little practice of tricking the older child "just a little bit"
make sure he really would rather be doing something else and then take him away from it to fuss on him as well as the younger baby.. he will want to get away from you.. he will be glad when he does and he will be glad the little baby now has to keep you occupied so you will not be pestering him in that way too.
just a trick
2006-09-15 01:38:34 · answer #9 · answered by David L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am about to have my second child and here are some things I have heard will help with jealousy. Buy a present and wrap it and bring it to the hospital with you when you have the baby. When your oldest comes to visit, give him/ her the gift and tell them it is from the baby. Let the toddler help as much as possible and include them as much as you can. They will be more cooperative if you allow them to help than if you tell them to give you time with the baby. I hope this helps! Good luck with everything.
2006-09-18 18:28:19 · answer #10 · answered by lookinout 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My kids are 22 months apart (cause i also wanted them close.)
My son never got jealous of our daughter. From the very start we made it really clear he was gonna be a brother. We use to always tell him to say hi to sissy and give sissy high fives.
I had to have ultra sounds twice a week and we use to take him to one. We let him buy something for her (he picked a stuffed animal) so that he could give it to her. I use to ask him if he wanted to read sissy a book, so he would read to her.
He did GREAT with her. She is 10 months now and hes almost 3 and they play soooooo good together and he loves to giver her bottles and talk to her.
Good luck. Introduction is a big thing.
2006-09-15 00:58:39 · answer #11 · answered by Natasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋