now ive found that hard cause i dont want to b friends i want to be his girl again...ive tryed just to be a friend but i cant help the way i feel.especially wen he still calls me by the pet name he used for me,gets a little flirty and even talks bout coming to see me....but now.he`s told me he thinks he`s found someone new...i dont want to hear how he took some other girl away for a romantic holiday or the fun he`s had with her...but he was also my best friend made me laugh like no other..and i do want him to be happy.but i wanted to be the one to make him happy..and in making him mad at the mo and he`s fallen out with me now cause i couldnt let go...he was very blunt in an email with me he told me he wants to be mates but ive got to sort my head out.....i dont want to lose him from my life but i know i am going to really struggle just being a friend....but i miss him so much and miss his daft s.o.h and the way he makes me laugh... my head is batterd. .what do i ?
2006-09-14 14:42:15 · 23 answers · asked by seeclearlynow 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
GET OVER IT AND MOVE ON!!-- if he has already told u that he loves u-- he even loved u more to let u know, and to tell u that he wasnt INLOVE with u!- that takes a man to do that!- i dont know the age, but there is plenty of good fish in the sea. I dont kno if u have some "unresolved" issues, however now is the time to concentrate on u and u alone!!-- i dont think that u r strong enough to be "just friends"-- and if he is continuing to call u and reminesice u need to put a stop to that~ u dont want to be a doormat, suck it up and get on with life. If a man knows that he has a hold on u, then he knows that u will jump, and do whatever when he calls, and believe me u dont want him to have that on ya. Yes it mite be a struggle at first, but again-- let it go!!!-- life is 2 short to be thinking should of, would of, could of, but u didnt, so move on, and enjoy life, and again-- concentrate on yourself, get urself worked on, find out what u want to do n life, and work on it. That way wen u real prince comes in your life this chapter would be behind you!!!-- and that is the step u want to take!-- good luck
2006-09-14 14:59:19 · answer #1 · answered by re r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you want to remain friends with him, as you say, then there is going to be a certain amount of tension between you. You probably should set some boundaries with him. Tell him that you don't appreciate the fact that he uses a pet name for you instead of your real name, that he still wants to flirt with you (put a stop to that), and that you really aren't interested in him telling you what's going on in his love life now that you two aren't together anymore. Once you set these boundaries and others that you might need, things should settle back into the friendship mode. It might take a while, given that you still love him like you do, and most likely will until you can find a man who will love you like you deserve, but I think that things will be OK, given the time to heal. I sure hope this helps, honey. Good luck and God Bless!
2006-09-14 14:50:18 · answer #2 · answered by kevin_p0 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get some therapy! Because you're never going to find someone that cares about you when you still have feelings for this guy and are spending time being his "friend."
Oh, sure, he probably likes the way you make him laugh and how you make him feel good but he doesn't like all these great things about enough to give up chasing other women and so, in a way, as long as you're friends then he gets the buddy to talk to, the "mate" he can laugh with but he also gets to screw any woman that he can get in bed.
Give him up as DEAD and move on with your life! You can't ride two horses at the same time and as long as you're in his saddle then you're not looking for the guy that can give you what you want to get out of a relationship!
2006-09-14 14:46:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to get over a break-up is to get away from that person. Seeing them will only deepen your pain. When my brother broke up with his gf, he was confused alot 'cos he missed being single, but he ended up back with her 'cos he loved her. The thing is, if he hasn't come back to you, then there's no point in still being his friend if you were only being his friend to hang onto a hope that he'll take you back.
Find someone new. The only way to find another great person you can't get enough of is to move on, heal, and discover that there is other great guys out there willing to be with you, just you.
2006-09-14 18:10:07 · answer #4 · answered by pacific_crush 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a typical line and when your getting dumped. They try and soften the blow a bit...don't be afraid to let it hurt and be done with him...I had a break up back in Jan and I was crushed, but surprisingly I move on rather quickly..and when I say moved on I don't mean finding another guy right away...give your self time to heal and grieve.
2006-09-14 14:56:46 · answer #5 · answered by kicker 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
best to have a friend than an enemy...i fell out of love with my ex...i loved him because he was a great guy, but i could not give him my heart, i just didnt feel that way for him any more..... we are still very close, we talk alot, sometimes when i need him he's there, he's still my best friend, so keep him as a friend....you'll regret it of you dont...it would not be fair on you if he was still with you and seeing someone else, so it's best to just let him do what he wants, you cant make him love you...be happy for him, let him go but be his friend
2006-09-14 14:56:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can be hard when the significant other has a change of heart when it comes to relationship feelings ......
it can be harder to think of being friends when you feel you have been so much more...
but feelings can change...
sometimes they can return to the love or learn to walk away....
be thankful he wishes to continue any form of relationship in a day when so many turn on each other as if have the plague.
2006-09-14 14:47:20 · answer #7 · answered by Marsha 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its always really hard when someone you love breaks up with you but the best thing you could do for yourself is no longer have any contact with him as this will just make it hurt more, try and go out and find someone else as hard as it is now it will get better with time.
Good Luck and i hope everything works out for you
2006-09-14 14:46:35 · answer #8 · answered by tigeroscar2005 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The "love me" or "in love" belief system if for the clueless, and not for a real man. He doesn't sound like much to me. Women really need to hold men to higher standards. There aren't a whole lot worth messing with, or going out with.
2006-09-14 14:45:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to assert this guy yet, it in basic terms isn't achieveable to be pals at this element. this is like being the boss and getting demoted to janitor. I easily have experienced this also and the whole suggestion i will provide is to placed as a lot distance between both of you as achieveable. I recommend drop off her radar thoroughly.....ladies consistently favor what they could't have.
2016-11-26 23:47:40 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋