i got married in september of last year.. three months later my wife started having an affair with my boss.. so i beat his ***.. left her.. and moved outta state.. first.. Was that stupid?..
she has been with him since then.. until just recently when he started abusing her.. now she calls me 30 times a day and wants to be my "friend"... im still so in love with her and im affraid that she knows that.. and is using me as a "feel good"... i still love her so much that i sabatoged my relationship with my gf so that i could "try" with my wife again... even though nothing has been promised.. once again..Am I Stupid?.. and most of all... should i try again?.. i married her for a reason.. she was the love of my life.. but now i dont know if i could ever forgive her for her betrayal..
2006-09-14 13:29:57 · 17 answers · asked by Matthew David 4 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
SWEETHEART,YOU ARE NOT STUPID. YOU JUST FELL FOR THE WRONG GIRL. AND YES SHE IS USING YOU! SHE WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO AS LONG AS YOU LET HER. YOUR BEST OPTION IS TO CUT ALL TIES WITH HER. IF YOUR GF IS A GOOD PERSON,WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO SCREW THAT UP JUST TO BE HURT AGAIN? LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP IS A GREAT SAYING. HEED THESE WORDS. GO ON WITH YOUR LIFE AND LEAVE THE PAST WHERE IT BELONGS,IN THE PAST. GOOD LUCK HUNNY!
2006-09-14 13:35:55 · answer #1 · answered by lisa j 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you answered your own questions. First, there is no "Stupid". It is the way you felt, and reacted to the situation. You keep saying that you "Still love her so much..." Do you love her enough to forgive her?? Can you ever trust her again?? If you love her enough to forgive her, and trust her again, then give it a go. If you cannot forgive her, and do not feel that you can trust her, then sever all your ties to her and move on.. That means no contact. No 30 calls a day, no talking, nothing. Make your decision and stand by it. You will be much better off in the long run....
And stop sabotaging relationships if this one is going nowhere....
2006-09-14 13:40:04 · answer #2 · answered by whidd2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not stupid, but even if you do get back with her there is a big chance that she will do this to you again when she did this to you she dindt give a **** about your feelings and if you do get back with her you will always have that in the back of your mind. I have being there once someone cheats on you this damages the whole relationship. I would say cut your loss and move on be with a woman that will appreciate you and love you.
2006-09-14 14:04:20 · answer #3 · answered by Queen Kitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three months after you got married your wife left you for your boss!! And you just gave up some one who loved you to go back to your wife!!?? Hmmm...somethings wrong there.I do how ever know that love rules the heart and the heart wins even though your brain is saying whats wrong with this picture!!You should be true to your heart and see her again, live with her what ever it takes to get you over her. Who knows maybe she does love you and this brought her to her senses. What ever you decide to do be sure to keep your bank account in just your name as well as your home, and the utilities so you can be free to send her packing if you need to. Don't sever your ties with your friends either you may need them in the future.
You are getting a second chance as well as giving a second chance .....I am a hopeless romantic and believe in those second chances and hopefully a happy ending.
~~Best of luck to you and yours~~
~Keep me posted as to how you make out~
2006-09-14 13:47:09 · answer #4 · answered by vtlovie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you shouldnt go back to your wife. She cheated on you, and will probably do it again if you gave her the chance. You've moved on - dont look back now. Yes, you did marry her for a reason, but you also left and moved out of state for a reason. I wish you the best.
2006-09-14 13:38:21 · answer #5 · answered by missie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You you really love her I would forgive her this once. Make it clear that if she ever cheats on you again then it will be over for ever. If you do decide to get back together with her remember that it might be hard to trust her now and building your relationship back up might take time.
2006-09-14 13:56:37 · answer #6 · answered by answergirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, so first of all, are you still married? If so, you need to resolve that before anything else happens. With what has happened, I would divorce her, but that is up to you. She seems very untrustworthy, selfish, and impulsive, based on her actions, and I couldn't be with someone like that.
Once you address your marriage, then you'll be able to make a more confident decision about her and anyone you might date in the future.
2006-09-14 13:34:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
look even if she left you for another guy , your heart must go out to her , he was beating your wife , omg can u imagine that . everyone makes mistakes , i think she learnt her lesson , give her another chance , you still love her. and plz if you do take her back , don't keep bringing up the mistake she made to her , that just causes old pain to return, doesn't do either of you any good
2006-09-14 13:44:34 · answer #8 · answered by jojo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know you love her and all but remember once a cheater always a cheater.... and cheating it a bad habit and ppl tend to always go back to their bad habit... even if they say they'll not going to cheat again, but trust me it will happen again... it's only a matter of time... so why would you rick it again... being hurt once it enough... even if you get back w/ her... the trust wouldn't be the same and you would always have to live in a life always doubting her love and trust....
2006-09-14 13:42:09 · answer #9 · answered by slt012 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont go back to that cheating woman u deserve better u shouldnt of did that to your gf!!!! and good job with the boss thing : }
2006-09-14 13:32:58 · answer #10 · answered by thinktinkgal 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋