I am falling apart. I am a 48 year old woman and my long term partner left me 2 days ago. Today he said he is unhappy and there is no future for us,and thinks a clean break is best, then seconds later he said he just needs to be on his own and take a break and doesn't know what he wants. He has taken very little with him but is coming over at some point over the next couple of days to get some more clothes etc. He has always kept another house 30 miles awy where his son lives and so had somewhere familiar to go. I can't give up on us. What do I do or say when he comes over. I love him so very much but perhaps haven't shown him enough of late as I lost my job and my esteem is so very low.
2006-09-14 11:57:00 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i understand how you must be feeling at this time.however,it sounds like this man may be feeling that life is passing him by.he is looking for something he probably wont find.this sometimes happens when men realise that they are getting older.he will probably realise that YOU are all he needs in life.give him a bit of time,and you will find he will come home.when he comes,just wish him well,and dont get heavy with him,he will leave respecting you,and will come home before too long.hang in there and good luck to you .god bless you.
2006-09-14 12:07:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she has moved along already. Some long-term relationships expire in less than 10 years these days. Though she gives you hope by talking about where she may be a year from now. Yes, she doesn't regard herself as single at the moment -- but is she committed to you or him? She didn't say. Complete the DIY so it won't be half-finished ... then consider renting it out if she hasn't come back. I think you ought to at least let her know that you would welcome her back forgivingly, but you should also be prepared that maybe she has closed your chapter in the novel of her life. Could go either way really. Good luck to you both. (The boss sure was a snake, wasn't he.)
2016-03-27 01:38:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest that when you find out what day he's coming over, cook a nice meal. Don't allow him to leave until the two of you talk. Inform him that if he's really so unsure that you would go to marriage counseling; that you want to make it work.
Explain to him that he is the love of your life and you'll do anything in your power to make it work, that you're sorry for maybe seeming down or turning him away, but that you'll do anything (including counseling) to save this relationship.
Be upfront, honest, and sincere.
Good Luck..
2006-09-14 12:04:54 · answer #3 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, don't let your age get you down. You're young enough to make a fresh start yourself.....better now than 10 years from now!
It's hard when you have to "break a habit". Try to look at it like that, and it may be easier. He's like a habit to you. There will be good days and bad days, but you are a human being and deserve more good days.
2006-09-14 12:01:07 · answer #4 · answered by professionalfemale01 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a very similar situation. My husband of 20 years decided he wanted a life on his own. I love him very much but I know it is better to let go than to try to hang on to him and end up losing my best friend. We do plan on staying in contact as friends but it does not help my pain of self esteem. You can not blame yourself for what he has decided. Get another job and go on with your life perhaps he will realize what he has given up and come back on his own. I hope mine does.
2006-09-14 12:02:13 · answer #5 · answered by jusme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he sould be doing this to your right now, since you lost your job and all. The next time he comes, tell him straight up that you're just a little down right now, and maybe that's it (he could be mad becuase your mad, that usually happens in relationships). Tell him you want another chance on your relationship, and tell him how much you love him, and show him you mean it (romantic dinners, etc.) I really hope it works out, my best wishes!
2006-09-14 12:01:04 · answer #6 · answered by Answer Givererer. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like maybe let him be, if he needs space give him this. Maybe seek councilling about your confidence and situation. Maybe help yourself and concentrate on you instead of him. I know you must be devistated, but try to keep a positive mind frame and work on making yourself happy rather than what you should do to get him back. If he has left there is a reason, and you can't change this.
Goodluck!! Keep your chin up, it will be okay.
2006-09-14 12:03:21 · answer #7 · answered by HappyHello 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People (the good ones..that you want) are in your life because they love you (for who you are) and want to be there. If you try to change who you are to appease someone it may backfire on you. Like that old saying goes, if you love someone, let them go...they'll come back if it was meant to be.
Try to be a happy, whole person by yourself. Don't rely on someone else to complete you. It just doesn't work that way.
2006-09-14 12:03:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is tell him how you feel. While I hate to sound so negative, chances are that you telling him this won't change his mind right then in there. It's good that you tell him though. It'll let him know that once he figures things out, and if what he figures out is that he wants to be with you, that he can come back to you.
2006-09-14 11:59:46 · answer #9 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should just confront him and ask him WHY he's leaving you. Then if you have a little talk, he just might come back to you.
If he doesn't just forget about him. Maybe there will be another love of your life ahead of you. Just put it behind you and move on.
2006-09-14 12:00:33 · answer #10 · answered by Sakura X 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋