how do you deal with people who talk behind your back?

Question

i don't mind them talking behind my back but i don't want them in my life. thanks.

one more thing. if you have such nasty people at work where they could be a threat to your "existence" what do you do. you want to keep them at a distance but they'll just keep pushing just to be mean.

no hon' i don't talk about everybody with everyone if I know this is going to affect them and make them feel sad or vulnerable. i'm decent & discreet. but thanks for the comment.

Answer 1

I think reality is that everybody is talking about everybody. You cannot avoid it.
The main problem - created by society - is a constant interest in other people's life - examples starting from gossiping to paparazzi.
So once society creates rules that go against human nature - people suffering are preocupied with others - making sure they are also suffering as well.

Answer 2

I found that confronting them with what they have said in front of other people who may not have anything to do with it will embarass them enough so that they think twice about doing it again. I am assumeing that these people are at work and therefore you would be justified in bringing it up in order to cover your a**.

I had that situation at work, they acted like high schoolers, talking about everyone behind there back and saying stuff they had no business saying. If it gets to bad, take it to your supervisor, they can have a talk with the person, but usually that just makes it worse. But you have to confront them in public eventually so they know you aren't playing that kind of game.

Maybe not the most comfortable thing to deal with, but some people are just really mean.

Answer 3

I will tell you
When ever someone come to you to report what someone else said behind your back your answer should be
*and what did you that say because I PRESUME THIS CONVERSATION was a two way * that should shut the tottle tel
and you march to the other person and Hi I heard you tell so& so
this & that about me
you must think that I am wonderful to use yourpresious time talking about me Thank you
Girl you will be amaze the affect that will have on them

Answer 4

You do not have to hang around people that talk behind your back. I found a friend of mines and her so called friend talking about me like I were no friend to them at all. I asked the two of them why was I so important to talk about? You should have heard the excuses that they came up with. Now the two of them are no longer friends and want to be my friend and the answer is no. I don't need friends like that when I have enemies.

Answer 5

a lot of people do that and I understand that it's hard .. I just ignore them and don't talk to them at all unless if they asked me a question.

I understand how you feel because I'd been through this situation, I understand it's hard.

tell them to back off and that they had crossed ur limits.

I hope this helps

Answer 6

Sounds like high school drama.
Find a new job. Doesn't sound like a reputable place of business.
Maybe you should mention the place so everyone can beware.

Answer 7

It tough. It's hard not to care what people think. We are human. People who do stuff like that are miserable people. Tell them to worry about their own lives and not yours.

Answer 8

I walk up to people, and say, "Are you talking about me behind my back?"

They'll say, "No!"

And I'll say, "Well, if you do, just do it loudly so I can hear it. Or talk about me in front of my back."

Yeah, that really messes with their heads.

Answer 9

You should become a success at whatever your job is now. That will make them envious toyou. but that doesn't stop people fromtalking bad about you, nothing does.

Answer 10

just dont listen and pretend you dont care-- they will sooner or later get the hint that you dont want to be friends with them. but dont take behind there back!